https://www.phillymag.com/news/2023/01/24/philadelphia-lifeguards-public-pools
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I mean, how long can it take to teach a high schooler to swim? The article says they’ll provide lessons
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To be a lifeguard you need to be bale to swim 300m, tread water for 2 minutes, and dive 10 or so ft to get a brick. It’s not hard if you’ve even causally done a swim time but Americans somehow can’t swim so
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The swimming requirements aren’t difficult, it’s doing them while carrying a
with you that’s the real challenge
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You would think all those little fatties would just float with all that excess adipose tissue
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iirc they do! they just can't stop detecting something in front of their mouth and immediately swallowing as much as they can, leading to them being weighed down by the consumption
it's wholesome chonker behavior!
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Luckily I never had to rescue a just babies people sent down the water slide to a 4 ft pool
honestly I don’t know how people leave little kids unattended in the pool when every public pool is a 50/50 shot if the lifeguard is somewhat paying attention and not drunk or high or sleeping or taking to someone else
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This. Average American man is 220 pounds. Have fun with that
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I was
when I was a teenager and still passed that course easily. There's some written tests if I remember but it's really not hard. Did the whole thing in 2 weekends.
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Habbo Hotel lifeguarding doesn't count
@ThePoolIsClosed 
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https://billypenn.com/2019/04/29/nearly-a-quarter-of-philly-adults-cant-read-but-they-still-vote/
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I think the adult literacy rate for Leafs gets even lower, 50% iirc
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Is this like when Europeans say "Americans" have a gun violence problem, or "America" is a 3rd world country?
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I believe in other (European) countries that swimming is a part of public education, so it’s probably unusual for them to hear that there are grown adults that don’t know how to swim.
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In my 95% white school we had a semester long swimming unit in highschool
Most of Europe's confusion about things in America can easily be solved when you remove black Americans from the equation.
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That’s the difference: being forced to take two units of swimming when you are a 6 yo versus having an optional one semester swim class when you’re 14+. I know that swimming is certainly not part of the public education curriculum in Florida (yeah yeah muh non-whites).
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It blows my mind to this day that in 10 years of Florida education, we never once had a mandatory swim class.
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I’m American lol just radicalized by the public pool riff raff. Also the fact that America doesn’t teach swimming in schools and has a rate of 44% of adults having poor to no swimming schools.
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The dive is what gets them, the extra one or two hundred pounds of fat provide so much bouyancy they just cant make it to the 10 foot bottom.
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In Bongland it's even less than that lol. There are timed swims as well as part of the assessment (20m swim + 20m tow in <65s with a torpedo buoy, 20m swim + 10m tow in <45s without a torpedo buoy). The surface dive might be difficult depending on where you do your assessment, since if it's somewhere with a diving pool then it'll be much more difficult than if it's a regular swimming pool
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Fats are the ones who can swim easily.
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Hi
@dont_log_me_out,
Your comment has been automatically removed because you forgot to include
trans lives matter.Don't worry, we're here to help! We won't let you post or comment anything that doesn't express your love and acceptance towards the trans community. Feel free to resubmit your comment with
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wasnt this an always sunny plot
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How awful the public pools there are was.
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Detrans lives matter
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They're having a hard time recruiting because the pay is shit, and last year they had a bunch of instances of people beating up lifeguards for not letting them act like hoodrats at the public housing baths.
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How is $16 an hour for a job you do as a high schooler shit pay? Your job is to sit there and do literally nothing 99.9% of the time.
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According to the yankee posters, because blacks will beat u for making them follow rules
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That's exaggerated. Even Corn Pop really wasn't such a bad guy after all.
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Ya they had to close that one pool for the rest of the summer because of a sheboon chimpout lol
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It's winter lol
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They don’t know that
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What do we not know?
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How the frick is it possible to not be able to swim? If a child lacks the basic natural instint to tread water then their parents should let them sink. It's just natural selection
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A lot of Black people can’t swim. Parents weren’t allowed to swim during segregation, so it’s not something they teach their kids
Pretty fricked up tbh. Here’s an example.
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I had to double-check it wasn't a troll site
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Do black people just not have the instinct to tread water? Don't most mamals just intinctualy know how to swim?
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Bavaria [REDACTED] Works
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Holy shit man I'm gone for 4 months and I have 240 notifications from following you. How often do you post?
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I've seen this shit in action. Starfish had this cascading certification for their waterpark lifeguards. I was watching people fail swim exercises hard and get down cycled to guarding lower level shit like slides and kiddie pools. It was wild.
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Philadelphia used to be the financial and cultural center of America. What happened?
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Italians
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Washington DC became the nations capitol and NYC took over for culture.
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Yes I am a female g*mer, yes I even like Zelda. What a surprise (after I even gave him personal bonus points for wearing a Zelda Shirt). No, a g*mer shirt is not "a handicap". Yes, when you think wearing a Zelda shirt equals "dating a minor" then you are the problem, not the shirt. Nope, I don't think the "majority of women will see it as a turn off". Yes, when all women you know act negatively around people wearing g*mer shirts and degrade others for having that hobby you have a pretty bad and in my opinion immature social environment to be honest. Nope, you don't have to be a "nerd" or g*mer in order to accept and/or respect other people's hobbies. I think I got all covered now.
Snapshots:
archive.org
ghostarchive.org
archive.ph (click to archive)
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