@goderator200's comment on 'A physique update and my ascent to egoism. How I will become a better Spiderman.'

Here is my current physique. I took these photos last night.

I am around 200 pounds now. The current routine I'm running is the Candito 6 week that I have modified slightly because I don't really need rest days, so I add a day in to focus on weakpoints. I do BJJ and Muay Thai for cardio. I do not track calories, I pretty much eat whatever I want which is why I am around 15 percent bodyfat. Once I fill everything out a bit more I will cut and go for ~12 percent bodyfat. Currently I am probably around 15 percent. I have decided to take a picture of my physique at the end of every 6 week cycle.

Personally I am not happy with where I'm at. My lower body in particular sticks out as being particularly awful (even though I am wearing the worst kind of shorts for a leg picture) as I have been taking it easy on my legs ever since I hurt my back going for a 505 pound deadlift. To remedy this I will start adding leg exercises to my "weakpoint days" as long as I don't have a full leg day the next day. I will also switch all my leg accessories to the 8-12 rep range and go to failure while keeping my squat and deadlift strength focused.

What I am happy with are the changes that have taken place in my life because of my pursuit of vanity. The increase in testosterone has given me the drive to get out of my parents houses and move across the country for a job (that my father's friend got me) after rotting for years. I have also been slept with five different women since August after a near 1.5 year dry spell, I've been experimenting with dating apps for the first time since I was in college. and it feels like I don't even have to try anymore. I have had success from simply posting a shirtless photo, or inviting them out to go "ghost hunting" with me.

I think a large part of my success is I moved into a much more populated location. I'm getting so many matches with just a lazy car selfie. I have also noticed that there are way less fat women here. I'm really happy with my move.

Now you are probably wondering if I am just posting this all just to brag. The answer is yes I am writing this because I like to brag and I really like attention, but that's not the entire reason. A big part is that I have been telling lies, and I need to get them off my chest so that I can finally move onto living a sincere life.

Most of you aren't aware of the years I spent as a NEET. I posted pictures of my messy room and my physique at the time, and my physique was pretty bad. I was in a really dark place the first time I posted it and just didn't care anymore. But I gained some slight amusement from the reactions people would have to how depraved my life was so I leaned into it and began to exaggerate. I added over a decade to my age to make it seem like I had been a NEET for a longer period of time. I pretended to be a virgin even though I did very well in college. I pretended to be proud of the fact that my parents gave me an allowance because of how it would upset the poors. Ultimately I exaggerated and played a character online to mask my struggles.

I obviously was not happy though. A happy person does not fall into the hole that I did. And it was especially painful because during my time at college I had everything. I was a college athlete, I had a lot of friends, and I was successful with women. The only issue I had was I would withdraw a lot because having friends was exhausting. I started withdrawing for a week at a time. Then two. I would lose friend groups during those periods, then I would come back and make more and lose them again. I had friends who tried to keep up with me but I ghosted them because I just didn't have the energy to respond.

It is a unique experience, to go from someone who had everything to having absolutely nothing. Due to my rich parents I didn't even have a struggle to motivate me, it was like I had entered into some sort of purgatory. I started to get all of my social interaction from trolling people on the internet, because due to my inability to be sincere I couldn't even make internet friends. I covered up negative thoughts with research chemicals and THC, which actually worked pretty well and is probably why I spent so much time in that hole. It was only when I tried to quit that I started to suffer, and since I had an infinite money glitch there was little reason for me to quit. I eventually I moved onto posting my peepee in anger just because I truly did not care anymore. That was probably simultaneously both my greatest and worst moment at the same time. Looking back at that photo now with my messy and dark room in the background I see a broken man, but at the same time I see one who didn't lose his pride. I was literally at rock bottom and I did not care. It was around that time that I began my ascent into egoism which is ultimately what helped me confront my insecurity and allowed me to begin rebuilding myself physically and mentally.

There are a few quotes from Miyamoto Musashi that accurately depict the period of my life that followed. "A shinobi would know the difference between honor and victory" as well as "Seek nothing outside of yourself". I took those to heart. There was nothing I wouldn't do for power. All of my attention went to improving myself and my own skills. I continued to use my physique to troll, it was funny to see it get better and better each time I spammed it at whoever I was arguing with. My training also started to feel good, the pump was euphoric, I started walking and getting around 10-20k steps per-day which cleared my thoughts. I took full advantage of my parents resources and sustained my body with the finest food and supplements. I used people like Zyzz and the Tren Twins as inspiration and started listening to hardstyle and ego-phonk all the time. I saw myself as a castle that needed to be fortified, and the rest of the world as potential attackers.

That mindset, of course, clashed with the side of me that enjoyed trolling. It also will not help me grow long term. It helped me out of this hole but now I need to adapt to my new situation. I don't think the solution is to abandon my ego, I think it will be to embrace, but in a way that does not cost me my sincerity. As I build a life that people genuinely want to be part of, I'm finding I have no more need of insecurity. My focus now is only on my art.

Which is why I am going to be starting a new project. It will be a spideymemes twitter account that is targeted at the growing Indian demographic. I will create a script that will take a spideymeme, apply hindi to it, and then automatically post it to this twitter account with tags that draw in the 1.5 billion sars. I will use everything I learned while making my trollstation to pull this off without a hitch and then probably get hired at Google.

https://x.com/rdramaspiderman

I will buy twitter premium so that my memes get more exposure, with the ultimate goal being to start gaining ad revenue. As I have no need for money, all of this ad revenue will be used to purchase marsey bucks which will then be transferred to @Spiderman. He has been a true friend to me, and is one of the only people who stuck with me through what I consider a dark period of my life.

I am also planning to finally get on steroids for real this time instead of just lying about it as a joke. My plan is probably to blast 500mg for a 12 week cycle. I want to run my current program for a few more months before I start so I will not be starting for 3-4 more months. I want it not just for the physical benefits, but for the drive it will give me in my career. I am doing a lot more than I used to do, so I am starting to get tired.

Also I will be meeting up with @Bridge irl after Christmas. We will go to Burger King and review their menu, and we will also get a few of their crowns to keep as souvenirs. Thank you for the attention. I will be marking this as an effort post to maximize the attention I gain from this post. Please follow the twitter account, I am too busy to start on it now but in the next few months after I make sure I can handle my job without getting fired I will be able to give it the attention it deserves.