Straight up, I need someone to do some CSS magic here for the hole, and I need images, memes, the works. And I'm will to pay in cold, hard MB. I would even make it crypto up to a certain amount if that's what you want. It's all in your grasp, your greatest desires realized. All if you do some webdev bullshit, or make me laugh.

The reason? It's election season. That's when we need to get good, or become registered independents. So, here's the deal Cornpop, I have some cash, you have some talent. Flap those titties and we got a deal, got it?

And to make it sweeter, and to hedge personnel costs, I'm making this a contest. I alone will be choosing the winners, but rest assured I'll pretend to take advice.

For CSS, and really this is first come, first serve if it meets the standard, I will pay out 20K MB.

For sidebar images, I'll pay out 3k, then 2k, then 1k prizes. I may tip some of you beyond that if we get some real bangers.

This is your chance to leave a mark on the world's most intelligent forum for political discussion. The internet is mostly bots and centrists, so we don't have a lot of competition.

If all else fails, remember: Extremism works.

!chuds wonder what subreddits Alec moderates

lmao he looks just like you would imagine

Wow

This is not an edit I copied it directly off his website

OTHERWISE THERE IS AN OLD PERSON NO ONE WANTS

(this message requested (presumably) by @Geralt_of_Uganda, our resident Witcher)

Thread theme

In my last State of the Race post, I discussed how tight the race was. Biden, despite the majority of Americans think he's old and r-slurred, had a very narrow lead over Donald Trump. I called it to close to call. Then the debates happened, and it became quite easy to call. Sleepy Joe was so bad that after some humming and hawing, he gave up and put Kamala in charge of the race. Any dreams of a 1968 Democratic shitshow were quashed as Harris extremely swiftly united the vast majority of the Democrats behind her candidacy immediately, with the ambitious types like Newsom and Pritzker instead bickering for second place as her running mate.

So, what does this mean?

Donald Trump (Crips - NY)

The facts for Teflon Don remain mostly unchanged. Here you have a tremendously unpopular man tied to tremendously unpopular Roe v Wade repeal (because America loves killing babies ) who can only win when he's facing off against people somehow less popular. There has been one major change - his running mate was announced

This eyeliner wearing cute twink has been the campaign's biggest weakness since announced. He is Trump's worst traits made manifest - while Trump has said he won't sign federal abortion bans, Vance has called for a total abortion ban without a r*pe or incest exception. While Trump's attitude towards women offends the median voter, Vance has said women in abusive marriages shouldn't leave. When Trump is left reeling trying to adapt to a new, much stronger opponent, J.D Vance has a minor media cycle about fricking a couch. (He probably didn't) (Probably).

Picking Vance was a double down to bring out his core base, despite the fact he had the r-slurred edgelord vote locked up, based on the idea that Trump would slap around Sleepy Joe. Up against someone that can form coherent sentences, he's suddenly a piece of dogshit.

Is Drumpf in an unwinnable situation? Not necessarily. His opponent is deeply flawed. She was given the thankless job of Border Czar, and that's an issue Trump has a massive leg up on. She can speak full sentences without sounding like she's about to die, but she's still tied to the unpopular Biden administration. There's already been a few decent ads attacking Kamala as a radical liberal, which could be effective. But will these ads generate more disccusion when Vance gets involved in another scandal about how people without kids shouldn't vote or whatever? Trump in the cycle has been strongest as an abstraction - the idea of Trump, this butthole who made the economy strong and preceded over a peaceful world, was someone the voter's could hold their nose for and vote. Trump, the butthole lunatic that hates women, does not get the same treatment.

And I'll address this now - plenty of people here will say "um who cares about Vance lole". Median voters do. The people who don't follow politics and like it to be nice and boring will care that the Vice-President would be a particularly r-slurred 4chan /pol/ user.

Kamala Harris (Alzheimer's Association - CA)

The above post makes it sound like Kamala's got this locked up, like the guys she got locked up for weed as DA in California, but that's not exactly true. Trump's net favourability averages out at -9.6%, while Cackling Kamala averages out at -13.6% according to the most recent gallup poll. The popular vote for Trump vs Harris ends with Trump leading by 1% - when Hillary Clinton won the PV with 2%, this seems dire for Kamala. So why was I pooping on J.D Vance so much?

Besides the fact he deserves it for robbing Burgum, there are only 2 issues with Kamala. 1. She's a terrible speaker 2. She's tied to Biden's administration.

Both of these problems are easily countered by her strength - she's not an old, old, old Catholic.

She is ready to make abortion, the Democrat's strongest issue, front and centre. And frankly, her likeability issues are overstated. It's not 2020 anymore, she doesn't sound like a high wine aunt anymore, she sounds fine. She's not good, she's not exactly Reagan or Bill Clinton, but she is entirely adequte. With just some modest rebranding, she can work on being more likeable in a away Trump can't work on his likeability issues (since being an butthole is his brand) and Biden's age issues (because he was dying). With months until November 4th and a massive cash advantage over Trump, it's my belief that she will win this race. And don't take my word for it - Trump is scared of her too, kittying out of the debates they had agreed on, since he cannot win against someone coherent and not dying.

Also I want to get this off my chest - I've seen people say online say "erm why are Republicans making fun of her laughing a lot lol they are weird" the laughing is bad!! It's annoying and fake and she should cut that shit out!! Don't you dare call her a Happy Warrior!! She is no Hubert Humphrey!!

Caveat

Kamala is seriously considering four men for her running mate. Governor Josh Shapiro of Pennsylvania, Governor Andy Beshear of Kentucky, Senator Mark Kelly of Arizona and Secretary of Transport Pete Buttigegig. For the most part, these are all excellent choices. Shapiro has a controversial stance on education but would ensure the key swing state of Pennsylvania, Beshear is popular enough to win as a social liberal in deep red Kentucky but the Kentucky Dems don't want to lose him, Kelly was a fricking astronaut but has a poor record on unions.

Then there's Mayor Pete. Shapiro and Kelly having glaring weaknesses, but they're dull policy weaknesses. They aren't campaign derailing frick ups like calling all single women "cat ladies" to just really piss off every woman into getting up and stopping you from winning. They aren't Vance. Mayor Pete is. He provides no strengths and plays into Kamala's worst weakness, her ties to Biden. With the other running mates, Kamala is an agent of modest change. With Mayor Pete, she becomes the Joe Biden second term. Trump is likely praying for her to pick to Joe Biden, so he can reuse as many attacks as possible on her. If Mayor Pete is her running mate, then I believe Donald Trump would win.

What did Ben Garrison mean by this

In my boomer times we could try to forget that you were on the enemy side for half the war.

Well to me it's like John Wayne in "Big Man Mclaine": It's like in the war. There's people (Japs) and there's us (people but the good guys), and I think that's pretty simple.

!chuds journo moment

Pulled AP article: https://archive.is/3gAIn

The Associated Press has deleted a report debunking a false claim that Ohio Sen. J.D. Vance once wrote about having s*x with a couch.

Vance, the former Bay Area resident who was recently tapped to be former President Donald Trump's running mate, is the subject of a viral online rumor spawned by a July 15 post on X. The post, from user @rickrudescalves, said Vance admitted to "f---king an inside-out latex glove shoved between two couch cushions" in his bestselling 2016 memoir, "Hillbilly Elegy."

This reporter has read "Hillbilly Elegy," and no such passage exists. Regardless, the post quickly went viral, causing several news outlets to publish reports debunking the claim. Mysteriously, though, the AP deleted its report Thursday.

A statement from the AP, which other news outlets pay in order to run articles written by the wire service's journ*lists, didn't offer many details as to why its story debunking the claim was deleted.

"The story, which did not go out on the wire to our customers, didn't go through our standard editing process," an Associated Press spokesperson told SFGATE in an email. "We are looking into how that happened."

A representative for Vance did not immediately reply to a text from SFGATE.

The numerous articles fact-checking and debunking the couch claim have done little to stop the spread of memes. On Thursday, X was inundated with posts mocking Vance. One showed a man trapped under a couch with the caption, "J.D. Vance when she wants to get on top." Another post simply said, "JD Vance upsetting his wife on purpose so he has to sleep on the couch."

Vance, who was selected to be Trump's vice president just last week, has endured a rough start on the campaign trail. The couch claim started gaining traction just days after Vance had an awkward moment at a rally in Virginia after cracking a strange joke about Diet Mountain Dew.

"I had a Diet Mountain Dew yesterday and one today. I'm sure they're going to call that racist, too," he said, claiming that Democrats believe it's racist to do anything. "But, it's good."

One X user combined the couch claim with Vance's soda joke. The user, @travishelwig, posted a photo of himself holding a bottle of Diet Mountain Dew in front of a couch. The caption read, "had a couple hits of this and now im looking at this couch a little different."

I searched Ronaldo a few weeks ago and found it right away but now I don't see it.

Did Jews do this?

I NEED TO UNDERSTAND WHY HE KEEPS BRINGING THIS UP. WHAT IS HAPPENING??? pic.twitter.com/E44sKhd8jo

— Damned Therapist (@DamnedTherapist) July 24, 2024

🚨Approximately 30 minutes ago, Gab learned that Thomas Crooks, the deranged Joe Biden supporter who attempted to assassinate President Donald Trump, may have had an account on our platform. We are unable to confirm that the account in question actually belonged to him.

The… pic.twitter.com/BcJrZJ4Yhk

— Andrew Torba (@BasedTorba) July 24, 2024

Who is Andrew Torba? I checked this incredibly low effort Kiwifarms post from Null and learned that he's the fat founder of rightoid twitter alternative Gab https://kiwifarms.st/threads/andrew-torba-gab-gab-com-gab-ai-dissenter-dissenter-com.36596/

!nonchuds

the bait post:

https://old.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/1eavo0h/donald_trump_and_japans_first_lady_who_pretended/

Explanation:

After seeing what some of these subs have become (non-stop Drumpf bad posts), I decided to test out the theory that anything remotely critical of him would get massive engagement.

I posted a picture of Donald Trump at a dinner with Shinzo Abe and a questionable claim about Abe's wife. This claim went viral on Social Media at the time, to the point that the MSM spent time trying to determine how true it was

When I checked this morning the post got over 100k upmarseys with mostly supportive comments all following a very similar format. They were either related to the title, or following the same three talking points (Trump is dumb, an adjudicated male feminist, old & likely suffering from dementia).

A few minutes ago, I was banned permanently from the sub, with the comment I made on this sub being the reason why (they literally linked it in the message).

When I asked what specific rule I broke, I was told it was against their anti-bigotry rule which prohibits racism, sexism, transphobia, etc.

They then linked another comment I made here with the caption 'you know what you did' and muted me.

Based on these events, it would appear large sub jannies are aware of this activity on their subs and also attempting to shut down criticism of it.

I know this is probably old news to a lot of you but I just thought it was worth sharing.

I've attached photos for proof:

Photo #1: Original post on large sub

Photo #2: Ban message

Photo #3: First comment linked in ban message

Photo #4: Comment linked under 'you know what you did'.

I did my best to discourage brigading but if the mods of this sub feel like this post puts this sub in danger from the reddit overlords feel free to delete this.

https://old.reddit.com/r/stupidpol/comments/1ebdnpd/current_state_of_astroturfing_on_reddit/

!nooticers learn your history

Were There Black US Presidents before? The people thought that Barack Obama is the first black President of the United States. Wrong.

1. John Hanson (a Moor) was actually the 1st President of the United States, he served from 1781 -- 1782 and he was black. The new country was actually formed on March 1, 1781 with the adoption of The Articles of Confederation. This document was actually proposed on June 11, 1776, but not agreed upon by Congress until November 15, 1777. Maryland refused to sign this document until Virginia and New York ceded their western lands (Maryland was afraid that these states would gain too much power in the new government from such large amounts of land).

Once the signing took place in 1781, a President was needed to run the country. John Hanson was chosen unanimously by Congress (which included George Washington). In fact, all the other potential candidates refused to run against him, as he was a major player in the revolution and an extremely influential member of Congress.

As President, Hanson ordered all foreign troops off American soil, as well as removal of all foreign flags. He established the Great Seal of the United States, which all Presidents since have been required to use on all Official Documents. He declared that the 4th Thursday of every November to be Thanksgiving Day, which is still true today. Even though elected, one variable that was never thought through was that America was not going to accept a Black President during the heart of the enslavement period. Enter George Washington.

2. Thomas Jefferson was the 3rd President of the United States, he served from 1801 -- 1809 and he was black. His mother a half-breed Indian squaw and his father a mulatto (half white and half black) from Virginia. He fathered numerous children with Sally Hemmings, a mulatto slave with whom he lived with in Europe.

3. Andrew Jackson was the 7th President of the United States. He served from 1829 -- 1837 and he was black. His mother was a white woman from Ireland who had Andrew Jackson with a black man. His father's other children (Andrew Jackson's stepbrother) was sold into slavery.

4. Abraham Lincoln was the 16th President of the United States, he served from 1861 -- 1865 and he was black. His mother was from an Ethiopian Tribe and his father was an African American. It was told that his father was Thomas Lincoln, a man to cover the truth, but he was sterile from childhood mumps and was later castrated, making it impossible for him to have been his father. Lincoln's nickname "Abraham Africa-nus the First."

5. Warren Harding was the 28th President of the United States, he served from 1921 -- 1923 and he was black. Harding never denied his ancestry. When Republican leaders called on Harding to deny his "Negro" history, he said, "How should I know whether or not one of my ancestors might have jumped the fence?"

6. Calvin Coolidge was the 29th President of the United States, he served from 1923 -- 1929 and he was black. He proudly admitted that his mother was dark but claimed it was because of a mixed Indian ancestry. His mother's maiden name was "Moor." In Europe the name "Moor" was given to all Black people just as in America the name "Negro" was used.

7. Dwight E. Eisenhower was the 33rd President of the United States, he served from 1953 -- 1961 and he was black. His mother, Ida Elizabeth Stover Eisenhower, an anti-war advocate, was half black.

So, America has survived and thrived through our first Seven Black Presidents and we will survive and THRIVE through the election of this one!

He seems to believe the shooter was a CIA asset and that Biden was involved with zero evidence to support any of that I also recall him believing the covid vaccine is designed to erase our memories and make us easier to control chemically among many other things.

1. Until Kamala Harris replaced Biden, every single lefty thread was going on and on about how bad a choice Kamala as a replacement would be.

2. Within 24 hours of Harris being the replacement, most of those threads have turned fully pro Harris.

3. This is going to create a whiplash even among half the lefties, who first would not be able to make peace with the hypocrisy, and secondly would still be riding with Biden with how much they have been propagandized over the years.

4. Trump will still be as liked among the people who were going to vote for him two days back. So Harris coming to the top is more about her gaining voters rather than Trump losing voters.

5. She is unlikely to have the support of the black vote due to how many blacks she has locked up during her career.

Conclusion:

Trump is still going to win because he is just like the last time he got elected, competing against somebody even more unlikable than him, only this time, he also has the advantage of them coming to the front in the last minute, and has that photo of him getting shot in the ear.

Because they're stupid

https://old.reddit.com/r/AskHistory/comments/1dp6j22/what_is_a_misconception_you_used_to_have_about/

So very stupid

https://old.reddit.com/r/MarxistCulture/comments/1e677ul/in_lugansk_monuments_to_the_victims_of_the/

Russians are also vermin

https://old.reddit.com/r/europe/comments/1e8jf69/russians_occupiers_demolished_a_monument_in_honor/

https://old.reddit.com/r/UkraineWarVideoReport/comments/1e8kcd5/russian_occupiers_demolished_a_monument_in_honour/

https://old.reddit.com/r/UkraineRussiaReport/comments/1e8ljyj/ua_pov_russian_authorities_demolished_a_monument/

https://old.reddit.com/r/europe/comments/1e8jf69/russians_occupiers_demolished_a_monument_in_honor/

But not as disgusting as redditards

https://old.reddit.com/r/PropagandaPosters/comments/16fy6f2/holodomor_rememberance_poster_ukraine_2008/

>A Michigan man suspected of using an all-terrain vehicle to run over an elderly man for supporting Donald Trump died by suicide as police closed in on him, according to authorities.

>Police in Hanpeepee – a city located in the state's upper peninsula – said the man in question was under investigation for allegedly running over an 80-year-old man at about 5.45pm local time on Sunday.

>The elderly man was described as a supporter of the former president who was posting a political sign in his yard, according to police. Police also said he displayed stickers and flags that were supportive of law enforcement. He was taken to the hospital in critical condition with serious injuries after the man on the ATV struck him, authorities said.

>Investigators said they had identified a suspect in the case by Monday evening, and he had been linked to a total of three cases which were apparently "politically motivated".

>That man later contacted officers, told them he wanted to "confess a crime involving an ATV driver within the last 24 hours" and asked to be picked up, police said in a statement. When police arrived at the scene, they found a 22-year-old man dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

>The events in Hanpeepee came a little more than a week after Trump survived an assassination attempt at a presidential campaign rally in Butler county, Pennsylvania, on 13 July. The gunman at the rally fatally shot a 50-year-old Trump supporter, former fire chief Corey Comperatore, while the former president was wounded on one of his ears.

>The assassination attempt prompted bipartisan condemnations of political violence, including from the vice-president, Kamala Harris, who is expected to be the Democratic nominee to face Trump in November's presidential race after Joe Biden announced on Sunday that he would not pursue another term in the White House.

>On 17 July at the Air Zoo Aerospace and Science Museum in Portage, Michigan, which by car is about nine hours away from Hanpeepee, Harris said political violence was unacceptable.

>"There must be unity around the idea that while our nation's history has been scarred by political violence, violence is never acceptable," Harris said. "There can be no equivocation about that.

>"At the same time, the hallmark of American democracy, the hallmark of any democracy is a strong competition of ideas, policies and a vision for the future. And just as we must reject political violence, we must also embrace a robust discussion about what is at stake in this election."

We need to Make America Great Ag-ACK!!!

!accelerationists

Kamala has now the odor of the unsuspecting ornamental doormat-style "yes man" second in command who suddenly & seeminly accidentally took power & changed the political course:
Sadat, Deng, Putin, Stalin, and of course, Claudius.

— Nassim Nicholas Taleb (@nntaleb) July 23, 2024

Timeline of Events

Sunday
•Joe Biden drops out.
•Kamala Harris announces campaign with Biden endorsement.
•Kamala Harris says she is going to work hard to earn the nomination.
•Kamala Harris makes calls to party delegates.

Monday
•Kamala Harris continues making calls to… pic.twitter.com/ZxzyxegZin

— Black Lives Matter (@Blklivesmatter) July 23, 2024

Fox new stands with BLM

https://www.foxnews.com/politics/black-lives-matter-says-dems-party-hypocrites-installing-harris-sans-public-voting-process

Catholics stand with BLM

https://catholicvote.org/black-lives-matter-blasts-dems-as-party-of-hypocrites-for-annointing-kamala-harris/