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I thought Donkey Kong December was forced and unfunny. 
Therefore, if I block everyone who participated in it, I'll stop seeing unfunny posts, and only ever see gems 
I called this idea 
COMEDY EUGENICS and I still stand by the principle of it, but ohmyGOD Kongs were the WORST target 
You guys carry this website. Seriously, my feed is absolutely dry and desolate now. It's magnatudes slower, and the posts that get through are less funny.
I'm sorry Kongs. You were right and I was wrong. I am reversing the ban
I'd still consider this experiment a success though. Why? Because, by making my feed a boring stagnant swamp, I learned who the real enemy is.
Wanna know who is really killing rdrama? The true coal miners of this site?!?
THE UNBLOCKABLES
THAT'S RIGHT!! THEY'RE THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO I DIDNT BLOCK!!! And when you see nothing but their post, oh my GOD is it a chore!
I am starting a new initiative. A NEW FRONTIER FOR COMEDY EUGENICS. I will be making a browser plugin that blocks ALL THE UNBLOCKABLE, UNTOUCHABLE SWINE!!! Then, and ONLY THEN, will my feed be pure!
in the meantime, I have some apologies to write.
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Previous post: https://rdrama.net/post/260719/marseyparty-event-carbine-carnival-1-lolcow
Hey friends. 
It's been 4 days and I think we've had some decent turn out in that time, some proper crazy from a lot of these doods. 
Although I must say that the so-called "!ranchers" of this site are sorely lacking. 
But now comes the part the lurkers love, it's voting time!
The prize is 10k DC/MB for the winner, 
and for the runner-up: the privilige of sucking a botched phallo like any good chaser would dream of. 
Here are your contestants:
First off is @Dramamine's submission: /u/broken-markers (he/they)
Pooner, Torrrettes, compulsive child kisser and attention seeker, eating disorder memes, constant relationship drama, parents tired of pooning, "disabled", post in /r/furry about insectsonas, has a cool lizard, lots of plushies like a real dood, makes unironic pooner art
the dood
Full post
The good and bad of an unfortunate tic about kissing kids
If it's a small crowd or one person I can apologize and explain I have tourettes (I have FND, not tourettes but that would take far too long to explain that, hey I have tics that look like tourettes but it's a different neurological condition... So I just use tourettes as the buzzword people can instantly understand).
It's unfortunately a very common tic for me, but my friends and boyfriend are very chill about it. I met with a new friend of a friend at a gathering and we thought it would be funny to just. Not mention the tics. It's clear I have them, but towards the end of the night my boyfriend just swung in and said "it's true you know. He really does love kids ;)" which cracked everyone up. I'm glad I have people in my life who understand and can joke with me about it all.
During a very quiet moment in highschool, during a school assembly, I yelled it. I KISS KIDS!!!! And everyone swung their head around to look at me. I just sank into my wheelchair embarrassed, until I made eye contact with my favourite teacher. He was bright red and teary eyed, stifling a laugh so hard, which made me smile. He was trying so hard not to laugh but it helped me turn it from being a mortifying moment to seeing the humour in the situation. Imagine that. A silent room and one kid screaming that, and then no repercussions because the kid can't help it. It was in hindsight really quite funny.
My mum loves me. She tells me that and shows me that and says she accepts who I am. But. She's been "just too tired and busy" to even try using my pronouns for 4 years.
She does so much for me, she's my full time carer because I'm disabled. So. I feel bad about complaining. But. She just doesn't try at all in this one part of my life. I'd be fine with her fucking up and making mistakes. But knowing that she won't even try hurts. She knows it hurts, I've told her that it hurts, and says she feels bad about it. But. She just has so much going on in her life... I know this. She does so much for me and so many other people, but it still hurts...
For the foreseeable future. Nothing is going to change with her, and I know trying to prompt my dad would be a waste of breath. I'm going to try and see if maybe my brother is willing to try, but it's also going to be difficult... I have amazing friends thankfully, but having her with me 24/7 (I have to be constantly supervised) can be hard.
I love insectsonas! This is Robbie the pirate beetle :)
This is Wembley the weevil! I'm going to make him into a costume :)
Went looking for my food scale that I hide behind my plushies and it was goneโฆ it's back in the pantry. Who found it. Who moved it. Oh God. They know. They haven't talked to me butโฆ
https://old.reddit.com/r/ftm/comments/vvpodl/i_failed_the_man_test/?sort=controversial
https://old.reddit.com/r/styrofashion/comments/uufbo0/my_school_formal_outfit/?sort=controversial
dood
Second we have @houellebecq's /u/stripysailor - A whole ass breadtuber
frequent poster on /r/ftmfemininity
breadtuber
And the 
bottom of this contest is @911roofer with two whole submissions, firstly is /u/bagooly, a weirdo that dresses up as an alien and obessively posts about snails and bugs (in a creepy way).
So I've been dealing with a very intense kind of ocd that's related to sexual themes for many years now. It was caused by too much Internet access, viewing things I shouldn't have at a young age and genetic stuff..im also autistic so that doesn't help. It is pocd, pedo ocd. I am deathly afraid of pedos and as a result of some trauma and being exposed to stuff, I gaslight myself into thinking im one. I see horrible visions hundreds of times a day and it is exhausting..I go in these loops for hours in my head battling with the thoughts. I've blocked myself from going on tik tok because talking about pedophilia is so normalised and even joked about. Its fucking miserable and my last therapist couldn't assist me much, though she did help a bit. I recently realised that I think im mistaking jealousy for attraction. I see teen boys and think what im feeling is attraction, but its really jealousy because im jealous I missed out on growing up male (im trans). I used to be much worse than I am now, I would go into these states of deep anxiety where I'd be sobbing and frozen still for hours on end being flashed images of horrible things in my head. But now I just feel nausea when I see them, but I can ignore it. I don't think im a nonce anymore, but I still have a nagging sensation in the back of my head.
This is where the problem starts, I cannot afford therapy and I don't even know what kind of therapists to go to..I don't have the motivation to go to one either, I just become stressed thinking about it and feel like I cannot be fixed. Can anyone give me advice, im very lost. Every day is tiring. I feel like I'm never gonna be okay, I wish I could look at a kid without being triggered. Is there anything I can do to soothe myself while I look into therapy?
I should mention, im not really suicidal, too lazy and id miss my family. But I do think about it and how it would release me from this torture. But im not going to do it.
Is also a Guilty Gear player 
@KongEnjoyer
Or more than likely only obsessed with A.B.A @Aba , the pooner character of XX
The other lolcow submitted is /u/sunnydaisy4ever; claims to be a muslim with a (ftm) โsonโ and a (ftm) โboyfriendโ https://old.reddit.com/r/ftm/comments/1bfvq0y/muslim_trans_men/?sort=controversial. She's divorced and put her kid on hormones without her husband's consent. https://old.reddit.com/r/cisparenttranskid/comments/1c3zf42/how_to_talk_to_parents_about_horomones/kzkx2wx/?context=8&sort=controversial
Her mother is Turkish and does not approve
Now... go vote young dramatard! 
(in comments)
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Most Based Comments
Basedness: ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐๐๐
naw you're going to gain weight with my baby in your stomach. (-8)
Basedness: ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐๐๐
Ask if over weight? Hides body. ๐คฆโโ๏ธ (6)
Basedness: ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐๐๐
Angriest Comments
Angriness: ๐ก๐ก๐ก๐ก๐
Angriness: ๐ก๐ก๐ก๐ก๐
The validation seeking of women in this subreddit is insane. (2)
Angriness: ๐ก๐ก๐ก๐ก๐
Don't listen to this loserโฆ you're not fat (-1)
He's being sarcastic dumbass. Ask stupid questions, get stupid answers (2)
Biggest Lolcow: /u/Ok_Spinach_1026
Score: ๐ฎ๐๐๐๐
Number of comments: 3
Average angriness: ๐๐๐๐๐
Maximum angriness: ๐ก๐๐๐๐
Minimum angriness: ๐๐๐๐๐
NEW: Subscribe to /h/miners to see untapped drama veins, ripe for mining! 
autodrama: automating away the jobs of dramautists. 
Ping HeyMoon if there are any problems or you have a suggestion 
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An American dad faces 12 years in prison for having a tiny bit of hunting ammo in his carry on bag in Turks and Caicos.
— Robby Starbuck (@robbystarbuck) April 24, 2024
He could miss his son growing up over this.
Do not visit there until heโs sent home. Let @TCIPremier know what you think about this! pic.twitter.com/ssOjS5sOPE
https://twitter.com/robbystarbuck/status/1783131128922087840
Bruh it's just spare bullets, he didn't know it was illegal!
https://twitter.com/robbystarbuck/status/1783146493731295429
Y'all
https://twitter.com/robbystarbuck/status/1783145423978242252
https://twitter.com/shakoistsLog/status/1783271257628438555
Remember Brittney?
- championoid : Keep yourself safe
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british table just stiffed on a $250 check. close the borders.
— brecht apologist (@madisontayt_) April 23, 2024
https://twitter.com/madisontayt_/status/1782686622959489105
https://twitter.com/keymaraes/status/1782744437472346153
- WayOut : Dramapilled
(proud straggot & bleeder tracker)
+ 
at NYU. High IQ 
protestors leading the charge! 
[FIXED AUDIO - 29
- 86
@Dramamine
@BWC PING RELEVANT GROUPS !grillers
So basically someone told her to protest so she did, like an obedient 
said her tattoos got her rejected for a job 
, but experts 
say personality is far more important
- mr_anthrope : Finally @i_only_downvote_bad_posts downvotes a bad post
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THIS IS THE MOVEMENT:
CITIES ALIGHT
TO SOME EXTENT
IT IS NOT THE MESSAGE OF THE MOVEMENT
BUT THE FACT OF IT
BUT "STOP ETHNIC CLEANSING IN ZIONIST ISRAEL" IS A GOOD MESSAGE
AND WHICH CITY SHALL BE NEXT?
I WILL CONVEY TO YOU THESE PRINCIPLES
THAT OCCUPY OF OLD DID LEARN:
1. SEND YOUR MESSAGE, AND LEAVE.
YES, OCCUPY WAS ABOUT OUR INABILITY TO OCCUPY PHYSICAL SPACE AS A PEOPLE
OCCUPY WAS BY ITS NATURE AN OCCUPATION
TEMPORARY OCCUPATION IS PRECISION
TAKE YOUR CITY BACK, EVEN IF JUST FOR BUSINESS HOURS
GIVE PLANNED MEDIA INTERVIEWS
STICK TO APPROVED TALKING POINTS
WE ARE THE 99%
WE ARE THE 99%
WE ARE THE 99%
ONCE THE MOVEMENT HAS BEGUN, JOIN THE MOVEMENT. MORE PROTESTS BECAUSE THERE ARE PROTESTS AND BECAUSE THE MILITARIZED POLICE MUST BE BROUGHT OUT SO THAT PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THAT WE ARE IN A POLICE STATE
WE ARE IN A POLICE STATE
THIS IS A POLICE STATE
PROVOKING THEM IS FOR THE YOUNG, AND YOU MUST GET TO THE OBJECTIVE, AND THE OBJECTIVE IS: ACQUIRE SENATE SEATS THROUGH LEGITIMATE MEANS
CONVEY MY REGARDS TO YOUR ASSOCIATES
, sorry
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๐ฆ๐ทโผ๏ธ๐จ SUBBED: Protests against Mileiโs reforms break out!
— Lord Bebo (@MyLordBebo) April 24, 2024
โThey buy used military planes for $600,000 but have no money for canteens.โ
What do you think? pic.twitter.com/8WTp65BZoY
She should talk more like this
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๐คฃ he just read the teleprompter ๐คฃ
— Clown World โข ๐คก (@ClownWorld_) April 24, 2024
"Four more years? Pause?"
pic.twitter.com/2g00pkHNd3
Him realising he had to keep that shit going for 4 more years
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Alright Ms.Corinthians 13:7 https://t.co/iR3C5gc8dL pic.twitter.com/q6gnNyW99i
— Max Bloomberg-Cohen (@SamWalters100) April 24, 2024
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Sex is for making children.
— Andrew Tate (@Cobratate) April 24, 2024
Any man who has sex with women because it "feels good" is gay.
Oh my pee pee feels good this is great!
In fact if you are 40 with less than 5 children you're probably gay.
All that feel-good pee pee sex and hardly any genetic legacy?
that they're being discriminated against while applying for jobs at 
businesses
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OP
100% of my applications with a white name were completely ignored.
More than 60% of my identical applications with a Punjabi name received a response, including some interview offers.
If Canadians hate ray-cism so much, then why are we mass importing a large number of people who only want to work with their own caste?
Letters to the Editor
A Lotta mad Indians in the comments lmaoo - pinkpantherlean
Hired an HR person of Indian background at our company. The only people she hires are East Indians. Not one white person in the two years she's been in the job. - SplashInkster
I've been having the same issue here in Surrey BC. At the warehouse I worked they hired an Indian manager. After that all the white ppl were fired and replaced with Indians. Then he moved my shift from the morning to graveyards which the company knows I can't do because I take care of my disabled brother after work so I was forced to quit. Now I have been unemployed for a year because the mass majority of surrey consists of Indians who run all the business and only hire their own ppl. - Life\_Patience\_6751
People out here asking for proof like they haven't been to a Tim Hortons, Walmart, etc. lately. And then calling you ray-cist for pointing out ray-cism? - New-Midnight-7767
Ever walk into a Home Depot or Lowes that has an Indian store manager ? Literally ALL THE FKN STAFF are Indians. It's disgusting the obvious ray-cism. I almost complain to corporate when I fill out the review on the receipt, and ya they apparently don't give a shit. - Unusual\_Eggplant\_642
8% of the population, yet 100% of the employees at a store. Totally normal. Nothing to see here... I have been complaining about this for a very long time. If Demographic A makes up... 3% of the population of your town.... but that demographic is somehow 50 of the 60 employees working at a single business, then there is a reason for that. And that reason is ray-cism. (And you know it's doubly true when you point out this absurd statistical anomaly and are instead called racist yourself.) - OldManSyndrome
Canadians have fetishized diversity and have been the most malleable population when it comes to having any identity - BigDinkie
Brother, as an Indian, let me tell you... They are ray-cist, s*x-ist and while they may be hospitable and nice, they're extremely ray-cist. As a darker skinned Indian, these Punjabis are ray-cist towards me. - CashBitter9664
This is just the start. I was warned before coming here, this is one aspect I hate in Dubai. Once they get to higher management, that's itย - railfe
At my last work I hired some Indian guys they were great I really enjoyed working with them, they were from the south and one time I had a guy in for an interview and they noticed he was from the north they basically told me if I hire him they'll quit - Additional-Rhubarb-8
Why does my upvote keep disappearing? - RedHotSnowflake2
Hypermuscular Hindu Beast 
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don't know where this talking point came from but all the online women got the memo. My anti-women tweets this week were met with a host of accusations of muslimry, where before it would have been some other slur https://t.co/fC3GPooZ6K
— Zero HP Lovecraft ๐ฆ ๐ (@0x49fa98) April 24, 2024
I'll vote for your guy pls don't take away my right to
Scrote moment
No wonder a Corsican and the Italians came closest to conquering it all
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I'D FIGHT HAT GIRL. FU-GIRL WASTES CHUDS WITH THAT BAT, AND SOMMELIER-KUN MOGS @Picos_ice_cream IN EVERY WAY EXCEPT SOCIALIZING.
@Picos_ice_cream STAND WITH ISRAEL BECAUSE MEIN FรHRER SUPPORTED A PALESTINIAN HOMELAND FOR THEM.
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- WayOut : Vive le Quรฉbec libre!
i like this marsey its the best 
to chant Free Palestine 
during Drag Queen 
Story 
Hour. I honestly can't even come up with a joke title this is beyond 
my capabilities
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Eh que jโai pas de mots polis ici. pic.twitter.com/huUcQ4CCfX
— Mell -โ๏ธ ๐ ๐ฎ๐ฑ (@Mielly007) April 24, 2024
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I have done a deep dive and have leveraged AI to analyse this schizo poster because it's really too much for any sane human being to comprehend. He literally posts essay after essay putting @sneedman,
@RitalinRxAlt, and the like to shame.
bring your word count up .
Anyway, the gist of it: dude sees layers and layers of conspiracy everywhere. He links shit that is and isn't real, trying to tie it to his incredibly long ramblings. He somehow manages to pump out a novel a day leaving the likes of Brandon Sanderson blushing (George RR Martin is already in the grave). He also claims to be a cowboy.
For the sake of relative brevity, I am presenting several examples of his most controversial unhinged posts as links to the full novel of a post on reddit that have the anchor text formatted as responses to prompts to chat GPT3.5 with "give me a one sentence breakdown of the previous post that highlights some of the more strange and fringe aspects" with the full text. Please let me know when you have finished perusing the library of babel.
I have broken up the following screed with some relevant marseys designed to occupy the attention of dramatards.
In short, I cannot offer you a summary of what this individual believes in besides a deep seeded pro NATO stance because they say so god darn much. They are literally posting as I compose this post. I can't keep up, I have to somehow sate my human needs for nutrition, hydration, waste expulsion, and sleep. It's not possible to keep up with this machine of a human typist. I cannot imagine the WPM this neighbor spews, may god have mercy on his family.
paying 15$ per foam container 
of eggs, chicken 
breast, and lettuce...rhats like 2$ of ingredients there 
Jesus 
christ 
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the fricking mundane drama of users lives has taken over this site but its whatever
literally, now some of us wanted a fricking cool countercultural politics joint
also like that aint working out
@Aevann Im happy to run a fricking spinoff site and a fricking codecel has been acquired otherwise, and The fricking spinoff site would be fricking faster but go off i guess
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