How to write like a dramatard: a case study

Many of you may already be aware of this website, but I thought I'd post it so our newfriends know what good drama bait looks like. Introducing sarahjessicaparkerlookslikeahorse.com! Some background: if you somehow aren't aware, Sarah Jessica Parker is hideously ugly and everyone rightfully hates her for it. In 1994 she acted in Ed Wood, and at one point her character actually asks "do I really have a face like a horse" (link to the clip), which is allegedly the first instance of the horse joke. Yes Sarah, yes you do.

Although it has remained relatively insignificant over the years, the site has attracted the attention of the Guardian, DListed, Perez Hilton (the webpages where these two mentioned the site no longer exist), and several radio shows, including a couple on XM. This is all due to the website simply existing; true dramaposting should be able to passively upset/entertain people like this.

The website's owner calls himself "The Stablemaster", and spent an incredible amount of time putting together everything from impressive photoshops, fake letters from organizations such as the "Greater California Bay Area Equine Anti-Defamation Society", articles on US domestic policy, and even making tasteful clips such as this one. The site is also embellished with several claims of awards they've received; adding easilly-disprovable lies like these to your posts is one of the easiest ways to upset people, especially if you double down after the lolcows point out your lie. Take note newfriends, this is how you write bait that's fun for the whole family.