Background: Rice University has a statue of its founder William Marsh Rice front in center at the main entrance. (wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Marsh_Rice) Unfortunately, despite donating his estate to education, he was not wholesome 100. Rice University was designated "whites only" and Rice had owned 15 slaves. Rice University is currently hyper-progressive and there has been a big movement to take down or move the statue (which holds his cremated remains btw). However, there's been some opposition, particularly from older alumni and donors. That's where you come in:
A little trolling: Rice has made an open anonymous survey for anyone to give their thoughts on the statue. Some people who care way too much about a statue with nothing better to do WILL read what you write. It's our responsibility to shed light on William Marsh Rice's buck breaking that historians have covered up. We can't let Rice get away with covering up all the broken bucks!
Also, if you want to write a more satirical bit, they featured over 200 responses last time, so the bar is low.
One thing to keep in mind: Rice students are like strawmen of progressives. I thought "fatphobia" was a right wing strawman until a Rice student unironically accused someone else of it. You don't need to tone down the absurdity as long it's the right kind.
Edit: copy paste your responses in the comments
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Did my bit by writing about buck breaking, peppering it with some whining about capitalism and multi-generational trauma and also suggested that the statue of Rice doesn't deserve any respect and hence should be replaced with one of Ray L. Johnson, the University's first Black student
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
FYI, I read a lot of the featured responses, and I heard all of those points unironically except buck-breaking.
Good job. Should fit right in.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Thanks. I also did a thing where I compared the statue with a violating phallus, drawing an analogy to buck breaking of the mind in CURRENT YEAR. Too far?
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Perfect.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
Goddam that's good. Pretty borderline, though. Those kids are just r-slurred enough to feature what you wrote. They won't let feelings get in the way of proper skepticism.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
I suggested public gay s*x parties and having queer POC drone operators blow up the statue
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Now we're getting r-slurred.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
Laughing so hard I'm crying
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
Where do you read the featured responses? Mine wasnβt subtle at all so I doubt it gets featured but one can hope
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
https://m.box.com/shared_item/https%3A%2F%2Frice.app.box.com%2Fs%2F643sihknv0vadpa7otzgxlm703jkjtu5
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
As a person of color I request, nay expect all Caucasians to apologise for their actions. Every action they have committed was either an act of violence against me or built upon the legacy of an act of violence against me and is therefore an act of violence against me and I will no longer tolerate any acts of violence against me.
Apologise. Apologise for your buggery.
The founder of Rice should be moved, along with his statue. His ashes should be buried in ground away from all university facilities in a place which nobody can or should visit. He was responsible for the breaking and enslavement of my people and slavery was perpetrated as a way to feminine-ize my people in a process known as "buck breaking". I have no idea if Rice personally participated in this but it goes as part and parcel of the black slave experience and is responsible for pushing a homofascist agenda onto my people today. We will not be broken and I will not forget the ruthless sodomy inflicted upon my ancestors.
Also the veggie menu in the cafeteria does not include hummus most weeks. Please include hummus.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
you moron, it does include hummus
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
I didn't actually check the menu did I?
What are you? The Daniel Day-Lewis of LARPers?
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
All those words won't bring daddy back.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
I'm doing my part
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
Everyone had slaves lol. Even the blacks. The natives had black slaves during the trail of tears.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Try to get in the spirit of things.
Nobody appreciates a seriousposting rightoid.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Agreed, however it's funny and sad that saying factual, non-r-slurred things about idpol race shit is rightoidism now
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Itβs rightoidism when you let it cloud a very nice trolling opportunity
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Don't stop short - all other concerns wither before the pulling of the leg.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
furry is zoophile blackface
Snapshots:
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Speak your truth king π
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
https://i.ibb.co/TKQ8rYY/8616c665bdc3.webp
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
My reponse to the first question:
And the second:
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
Forget the statue, I recommended renaming the university. βThe name Rice cannot be separated from the practice of slavery itself.β Changed the wording a bit obviously.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
gonna try to say the name of the university is racist because rice was stolen from bipoc by colonists, and should be renamed to an indigenous grain like maize.
here's what I ended up writing
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
I LARPed a buttmad old rightoid who would never give a penny again if they touched the statue
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
Didnt grab my response to the second question. It was about buck breaking though.
It is insane that they still allow half starved, stick figured proportioned women to walk around campus. As someone with a larger body type, the way these vapid bimbos trance around is very obviously done to provoke others. I end up staying by in my room because some of girls I see around campus trigger my anxiety so much. Can we have some space made for larger body typed women to feel more comfortable?
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
Said some crap about "BIPOC bodies." Let's see if it's included
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
Link?
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Nvm, I am r-slurred.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
So cute :)
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
It's OK, we all are
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
I ran out of funny ideas help
https://i.ibb.co/XZCs6qK/4659028f0475.webp
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
why does this need to be a country club post
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
i don't want them to trace my username to find my identity (shouldn't be possible anyway, but I'm paranoid). I also posted this on mobile data so they can't track me that way either. If you want to post a clone of this yourself, I can delete this. Also, the responses might be a little more restrained and not "n-word lmao"
Edit: Screw it, publicly listed
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
No one at Rice is smart enough to do that tho.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
is there anything more cucked than attending a non T10 private school?
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
This but unironically. What a waste paying money to be educated in Texas.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
Found the schizo.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
if I were named make Pepe dank again I would not post my university on the internet just personally
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Wait, does he go to this college?
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
yeah and I only know that because he indicated it in another comment here. heβs just dumb
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
youβre really dumb
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
oh ic
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
I provided some useful feedback
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
I did my part. Feels good to be a conscientious citizen of the drama state.
https://i.ibb.co/ZJv9ZVD/5561a29a6951.webp
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
Is "Living Privlidge" too obvioius?
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
So when are we going to see what gets featured?
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Survey closes the 30th. If they show responses again (may not happen again), it will be at the soonest weeks after that, but I wouldn't count on it. They'll probably announce a decision and that will be it. They might also complain about a racist group submitting hate speech after that one guy's response. I'll keep you posted, but don't expect anything to happen.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
Jfc that's 3 owls in one cartoon cat fan forum - Who Knew?!
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
I use to have rice football season tickets, cause my dad was cheap
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context