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EFFORTPOST CHUD :marseyclapping2: Kino :marseyclapping2: REVIEW: "Lady Ballers" (SPOILERS INSIDE)

What's up g*mers. Merry Fistmas to you and Season's Sneedings. Enjoy this early Christmas gift.

On November 27th, 2023, the "Daily Wire" revealed a trailer for their upcoming "comedy" film, titled, "Ladyballers." Have yourself a peek if you haven't already:

The film was directed by and stars Jeremy Boreing, the CEO of the "Daily Wire," a chud internet news outlet-turned media company.

BRIEF REVIEW

This movie is absolutely r-slurred, but is not as bad as I thought it would be.

As far as comedy goes, the film has a mixture of geriatric Facebook humor, "dudebro" comedy, and unfunny slapstick. There are some visual gags that are pretty hilarious, and the pacing is not bad either. Still, it's preachy at times and many of the jokes fall flat.

In interviews promoting this film, Jeremy Boreing often spoke about the "raunchy" comedy films that were popular in the early 2000s, like "Dodgeball," and "Tropic Thunder." Boreing lamented that these kinds of films are no longer being made, and really haven't since the Obama administration (that's right, Obama ruined America AND comedy movies). This movie was very much inspired by those kinds of films, which is very clear to see in the final product.

Still, the movie lacks a "polish" that a real Hollywood film from that era would have, as nobody with actual talent would risk their careers to be in this movie. Many of the jokes are like 70% propaganda and 30% joke, not dissimilar from an SNL sketch, but written from a right-wing point of view. Many of the jokes that are actually funny are poorly delivered. I found myself laughing at jokes because of how bad they were.

Considering that nearly all of the "actors" in this film are not actors, this wasn't terrible. If you like "dudebro" comedy or are a fan of the Daily Wire, you might actually enjoy this film. There is no groundbreaking social commentary on transwomen in sports, or even any new jokes making fun of :!marseytrain:s (again, it's all boomer-tier :marseytrain: humor).

If you want to see an actually hilarious movie made by the Daily Wire, watch "What is a Woman."

SYNOPSIS (Spoilers Ahead)

The story begins with a flashback to 2008. High School Basketball Coach Robert "Rob" Gibson (Jeremy Boreing) is on the sidelines, coaching his team during the Tennessee State finals. Being down ten points at halftime, Coach Rob delivers an "inspirational" speech to his players in the locker room, telling them that "winners are just losers that win."

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His team rallies from their deficit to defeat their opponents and secure their state title. After the game, he is interviewed by the local news, who dub him "COACH MIRACLE." Rob basks in this moment, winning his THIRD state championship as he holds his beautiful wife, Dharby.

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The scene fades to the modern day, 15 years later. Rob is now a recreational league basketball coach at a rundown community center, and his players are completely disinterested in anything he has to say, instead using their phones during practice. An extremely African American player, Kevin, openly disrespects Coach Rob while he gives a speech on the importance of winning.

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Rob mentions an international competition known as the "global games," an event in which anyone can compete for the glory of being a winner. The players seem completely disinterested. Kevin then body-checks Coach Rob after he makes a comment about the someone from the rec league stealing his catalytic converter. Kevin drops a literal sawzall while doing this, which is meant to be a gag I guess.

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As the players leave, Rob gets a text message from his daughter Winnie, who needs to be picked up from elementary school. He speeds down to her school while speaking on the phone with Gary, the director for the rec center. Gary explains to Rob that it's racist to tell the students to not steal from him, and after Rob makes a comment about stealing being bad according to the bible, Gary fires him over the phone.

As Rob pulls into the school, his car is giving off significant amounts of fumes and noise due to the catalytic converter missing.

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Quick Notes From Holly!

Getting your catalytic convertor stolen sucks a fat peepee. I had it happen to me once. I left my piece of shit car parked at my work overnight and some tweaker took a sawzall to my car and stole it. As I turned over the engine, the loudness was deafening. The car's engine was no longer connected to the muffler, so the raw noise of the engine made my small commuter car sound like a formula 1 racecar. Catalytic convertor thefts have been on the rise in the US and on the west coast for many years now. They are commonly stolen for the rare, precious metals inside, including rhodium, platinum, palladium and sneedium. State and local governments have decided to combat this rising theft problem by requiring photo ID to sell used car parts, which is r-slurred because these things are being stolen for their precious metals, not their value as car parts.

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Rob arrives at the elementary school to pick up his daughter Winnie, where a triple covid-masked teacher accosts him for being late for the fourth time. Rob can't hear the teacher sneeding at him, so she removes her three masks one by one while yelling at him (I lol'd at this scene).

As Rob drives his eight year-old daughter home, he asks her about what she learned at school that day, and she proceeds to regurgitate socialist talking points about the cold war and capitalism. Winnie then mentions that a classmate showed Winnie "her peepee" in the girls bathroom. Rob is incredulous and asks why a boy is in the girls bathroom. Winnie explains that the "boy's" name is "Mary Margaret" and is actually a girl, and Rob needs to stop "misgendering her." Rob expresses disapproval the public schools curriculum, and mentions sending Winnie to a private school. Winnie retorts that private schools "uphold white patriarchal privilege." Rob asks Winnie where she is learning all this from, thinking it's the public school. Winnie explains that she learned this from her mother Dharby's new "partner," Kris.

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Rob pulls up to Kris's place, where we find Kris (Matt Walsh) meditating in the front yard in front of some tacky rainbow "in this house" signs. His entire house is decorated with "current year" political signage. Rob tries to have a conversation with Dharby about what happened to Winnie that day, but is interrupted by Kris, who talks about an upcoming athletic competition he is training for, which has $5,000 cash prizes for each heat.

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Kris explains that he values his health and keeps himself in shape with MRNA vaccines and an insect-based diet (I laughed at how terrible these jokes were). As Kris wanders off, Rob can't believe that Dharby replaced him with such a clown, but Dharby explains that Kris is a good man that cares about things other than winning. Rob tells Dharby that winning is important, and Dharby responds by telling him that if Rob thinks winning is important, he should try it sometime (sick burn). Rob leaves in a huff.

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Looking for work, Rob arrives at a CD store he worked at as a teenager. His boss told him he was always welcome back, so Rob arrived 25 years looking for a job. He was greeted by a beautiful black queen, who explained to him that the store had changed ownership in that time, becoming a diner known as "The Dollhouse" that features drag queens as waitresses (why isn't this a thing). Rob is shocked to find one of his former star players from his 2008 team, Alex, working at the diner dressed in drag. Rob got hired on as well.

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The scene cuts to the two men dressed in drag, sitting at the bar together, and lamenting their circumstances. When Alex asked what happened to Rob, Rob explains that he hasn't changed, but the world around him has. He complains about how the world has gone soft, how men are supposed to "lead from behind, not make fun of losers, and get out of the way" and how people don't value "winning" as much. Alex explained that he tried his hand at acting for about ten years in LA, but couldn't find work, obviously due to the fact that he's a straight, white male. Despite the years taking their toll on Alex, he claims he is still an extremely fast sprinter.

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We now see the two men in an alleyway, with Alex sprinting to show his coach that he's "still got it." Rob convinces Alex to train for the upcoming competition, "Nashville Runs." They began their training immediately, running away from a high level coomer, who becomes a running gag in the movie:

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The next day, Alex and Rob attended the competition, with Alex still wearing his blonde wig from work. Upon attempting to register, the official told Rob that the men's events were all full. Rob refused to leave the line, and the white blonde woman official threatened Rob with her taser, saying "I will tase a white man" before actually tasing him. Upon seeing Alex and thinking he is a transwoman, the official apologized profusely and allow them to register for the women's events instead, free of charge.

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Rob decides to go along with this, telling Alex that even a male athlete "past his prime" is still significantly faster than a woman in peak physical condition. Alex resents being told he's "past his prime," and takes issue with competing against biological women. Rob explains that his daughter had told him that this is the way the world works now. That if Alex is going to wear a dress, he may as well wear the dress of a champion. Alex put on fake tits and joined the other women on the starting line.

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Alex destroys the women in the competition, winning every single women's event by massive margins. This drew the attention of the local news. News anchors Stacy Santiago-O' Brian (Brett Cooper) and Drake Diamond (Michael Knowles) were called out by their fellow journo, investigative reporter Gwen Wilde (Billie Rae Brandt) for misgendering Alex during her coverage of Alex's record breaking achievements that afternoon.

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After the competition, Alex and Rob celebrated their victory at the bar, with Rob pocketing most of the money and only leaving Alex with $500. Alex mentioned that he has been approached for a sponsorship by bud light (lol). While discussing plans for their next grift, the two are interrupted by Gwen Wilde, who confronts them with her knowledge that Alex isn't trans and they are doing this for the money. It turns out she is secretly a TERF, but wants in on the grift.

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Gwen explains that as the "DEI" crowd got their paws on the "Global Games," they have since "democratized" the competition, allowing amateur

s to tryout for the games. The organization also began allowing transwomen to compete. Gwen believes that it won't be long until all of the best woman athletes in the world are, in fact, men.

"Cheating, lowlife men, like you."

Alex protests, saying that everyone will hate him and Rob if he attempts to compete in the "Global Games" as a woman. Gwen responds that the public will LOVE them for doing this, because she will tell them to, as this is her job as a journaloid. She offers to run PR for them in exchange for exclusive rights to their story, and half of the prize money. Gwen then comes on to Rob, who takes him home and ties him up later that night. He gets a surprise phonecall from Alex, and two come up with the brilliant idea of playing basketball in the "Global Games." The two then decide to get the team back together.

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The pair find the Crain brothers, two half-brother fraternal twins that were known for constantly fighting, but also being very close. The two brothers had opened up a sussy used car lot. They were easily convinced to join Rob and Alex, who had neglected to tell the brothers that they would be competing as "women."

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The team went on to find their former center, David (the dude that sort looks like Elon), living deep innawoods after suffering a mental breakdown during a college basketball game several years ago.

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In college, David witnessed a Badger mascot doing pelvic thrusts, which caused him to get distracted and lose the game.

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This lead to him fleeing to the mountains, building a cabin, and spending his days murdering badgers. David wouldn't be as easily convinced to join the team, who did a terrible job or persuading him, mostly calling him fat and weird. After his former teammates left, David made his way to the basement of his cabin, revealing the mascot tied up and held hostage at his cabin.

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David emerged from the cabin and announced that he would rejoin his old team. This left the squad needing only one more player. The reunited athletes looked through their old school yearbook at the Crain Brothers dealership, looking for any old players that would still be interested. David then arrived freshly shaven, with a FRICKING JEREMY'S RAZORS AD IN THE MOVIE.

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It didn't seem like anyone good was still available. The team came up with one more idea. Their old towel boy, Felix.

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Felix is super rich now, but is still very much the same person. He is super weird and is obsessed with what his former highschool friends think of him:

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As the players settle in to Felix's home gymnasium, which is creepily similar to the one they played on in highschool, the former teammates erupted in a fistfight after David's PTSD was triggered by one of the Crain brothers doing pelvic thrusts in their old highschool mascot costume.

Their scuffle was interrupted by Gwen, who had arrived unexpectedly, and informed the teammates that Rob had neglected to tell them the "terms" of their new "professional sports careers." Rob explained to the men about his plan for them to compete as women, against women, for the purpose of making a bunch of money.

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The players did not take this news well. They had been excited to be part of a team again, and relive their glory days. They weren't thrilled about dressing up like women to beat them.

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Coach Rob gave another one of his inspirational speeches. Rallying the players around the fact that they basically all peaked in 2008 (except for Felix obviously), with the Crain bros now running a skeezy dealership and David living innawoods off of rodent meat. If they want to reclaim their former glory, they needed to need to take this chance at success. This shitty speech is enough to convince these broken men to sacrifice the last part of their dignity and dress up as women to compete together once again.

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Just after this speech, Dharby also arrived at Felix's gymnasium to drop off Winnie. She seemed to be affected by the presence of Gwen, thinking that Rob had actually moved on from their relationship.

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The players checked out their new jerseys, and start dressing up. Rob mentioned that the players would need to shave, as women don't have beards. Winnie corrected him, saying that lots of women have beards, including her art teacher. Gwen picks up on Winnie being well-versed in "current-year" politics, and decides to pick her brain. Winnie then lectured the team on all of the convoluted gender identities.

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Winnie explains that as a "man," you can become a "woman" without any physical changes to your biology. You were a "woman" all along, unless you decide to be a man again. Then you were a "man" all along, unless you can't decide, in which case, you're "genderfluid." The players think this is kind of bullshit, but Alex reassures them that being a woman is easy, you just need to shave your legs, cry at work, and tell yourself how brave you are for doing things that require zero physical courage.

THE GLOBAL GAMES

The team made their way to a "Global Games" qualifier being held in Nashville. We see our news anchor friends have returned and are now virtue signaling HARD following their on-air embarrassment.

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Here we see the time for the first time, the "Lady Ballers" in all their glory.

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The women's qualifiers are almost completely empty, as nobody actually cares about women's sports, including other women. The only people in attandance are a lone dude passed out in the stands, Winnie, Kris, and a mortified Dharby.

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(God I love Kris, he has the best energy) The "Lady Ballers" faced off against the "Hawkettes." Upon seeing the "Ladyballers, the "Hawkettes" coach immediately begins SNEEDING, incensed at the idea that his all female team is playing against a bunch of grown butt men in wigs. They turn to the referee, who is none other than BEN SHAPIRO himself. Ref Shapiro explains that he doesn't give a shit either way, that he was only paid like 50 bucks to be here. The game began, and while the women used actual tactics and "basketball fundamentals," the men easily overpowered them with their physical advantages. The women's coach threw his jacket on the ground, calling the game "garbage." He then received a technical foul from Ref Shapiro, who also cussed him out on the sideline, owning his butt with facts and logic.

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As the game continued, Gwen posted clips of the game to social media. A "social media flash mob" randomly showed up at the arena and start cheering on the "Lady Ballers," who were literally dunking on their female opponents, beating them 98-17. David noticed the "Hawkette" players crying on the sidelines following their defeat, being consoled by their coach, which had a deeply negative effect on him, and he began to have second thoughts on this whole operation. Also affected by this was Dharby, who thought this entire game was a total mockery of sports.

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The players were then offered many lucrative sponsorship deals immediately following their triumph over the "Hawkettes." Seeing the limitless potential of the "virtue economy," the players decide to stay the course. They continued to sweep the competition in the qualifiers with ease, winning their next four games with almost zero effort. In addition to dominating women's basketball, the "Ladyballers" also competed in other women's events being held at the "Global Games," including weightlifting,

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wrestling,

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and swimming (featuring a cameo from Riley Gaines, the sore loser swimmer who lost fair and square to Lia Thomas).

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The Crain brothers also explored their newfound sexual identities as 'lesbians," boldly going into the women's locker room.

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Felix, now going by "Shelix" became a Dylan Mulvaney-style influencer.

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As the "Lady Ballers" notoriety began to grow, Gwen covered their rise in a televised, exclusive interview. The team discussed their rise, and their issues as "trans athletes." Alex gave a tearful, seemingly heartfelt interview on the struggles of being a transwoman. Also while on the show, Coach Rob explained to Gwen that according to Winnie, one can even be "trans age," allowing "Shelix" to play teeball against elementary school girls. The movie cuts to "Shelix" going up to bat against a flabbergasted girls team, hitting a line drive that takes out a girl in the infield.

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After the interview, Coach Rob touched base with the players. While David was focused on making the women's tennis team, and the Crain brothers were interested in using their notoriety to hookup with female fans, Alex seemed to be actually really happy about living as a woman (this is subtly hinted at throughout the movie up to this point, but now it's out in the open). And admitted that everything he had said during the interview was true.

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After leaving the studio to meet with Dharby in the parking lot to drop off Winnie, Dharby confronted Rob about his grift, telling him that what he is doing is wrong. Dharby goes on to say that the only person on his team who is probably trans is "Alex," who is deeply unwell. Rob counters Dharby by mentioning that he learned all this gender shit from Winnie, who learned this from her woke school, and Dharby's woke "partner," Kris. Rob goes on to say that it's bullshit that r-slurs like Kris get to make this crap up, but when people like Rob capitalize on it, then all of a sudden he's the bad guy.

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Rob says the only thing that matters is that he is happy, and his "girls" are happy. Dharby retorts back that they "aren't real girls." This is overhead by our boy Kris, who can't believe what he has just heard from his "lover" Dharby.

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Dharby, fed up with everything, leaves with Winnie, leaving Kris and Rob together in the parking lot.

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"At least we still have eachother."

The movie cuts to game four of the semi-finals. Here we see a cameo by the Zodiac Killer himself, Ted Cruz!

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The "Ladyballers" are playing like "Ladyballsack." David's wrists are fricked up from playing tennis, the Crain bros are tired from piping women all the time, and Alex is slowly morphing into a woman himself, and is getting worse at sports as a result.

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The "Lady Ballers" won, but it was an ugly win, with the game ending in a brawl between the Crain brothers. Rob gave a press conference, doing damage control for his team, and reassuring everyone that the "Lady Ballers" would be able to perform in the finals.

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Exhausted from the day's events, Coach Rob sat in the locker room, trying to decompress. Winnie walked in, and asked her father if they could talk.

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Winnie sat down next to Rob and told him that she wants to become a boy. She said she wanted to be a winner, just like her Dad. She explained that she thinks boys are simply better at everything, like basketball, swimming, MMA, STEM, karate, being rockstars, driving, parking, opening jars, etc. Rob concedes that boys are better at those things, but they are just things men made up to be good at. Rob went on to say that women are better than men at all sorts of things, like being nurturing, multi-tasking, caring about people, making friends, and that, most importantly, women civilize men. That the world would not be able to exist without women. Plus women can bring people into the world, which is a superpower no man will ever have. Dharby overheard this heartfelt message from father to daughter, and was deeply moved by it.

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Rob returned home to find Gwen in his house, who had picked the lock. The journo confronted him about his post-press conference conversation with his daughter that she had overheard, as Rob was still mic'd up from the press conference.

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Gwen then told him that he needs to get control of his team or she would expose him as a fraud. Gwen is fully dedicated to profiting off of the transhumanist grift, and has staked her career in profiting off of the trans movement. She needs Rob to win and make sure his team can keep it together or she will "cancel him."

THE FINALS

The qualifier finals begin with a shot of or beloved news anchors. #Transracialism

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(This is the hardest I've laughed in the movie up to this point)

Our brave "Lady Ballers" took to the court, where they met their opponents:

THE COWGIRLS

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The "Lady Ballers" were awestruck. The "Cowgirls" coach had swapped out his all female roster with REAL BLACK DUDES and it looked like Gwen has also switched sides/was playing both coaches. There was no way they could stand a chance.

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The homeboys BALLED on these fake-butt honky bitches. The "Cowgirls" buckbroke the "Lady Ballers" the same way they had buckbroken all of the legacy women's teams previously. They ended the first half 0-55 against the "Cowgirls."

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After the first half, the exhausted "Lady Ballers" returned to the locker room, where the Crain brothers were confronted by a "Hawkettes" player they fricked during a "basketball slumber party" together. She revealed that she was pregnant with twins, and that each brother was the father of one twin.

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The spirits of the team were in shambles. They were worn out, and it was clear their grift (at least in basketball) had run its course. As they reentered the court, Coach Rob admitted that they "have taken this as far as we're gonna take it." Rob then said that while the "Lady Ballers" aren't girls, they sure as heck aren't men either. The only thing they could do now is lose the game with some dignity.

The players did remind Rob that they had still qualified for other Women's events in the Global Games, so they would all still be attending, but probably not for basketball. Rob told them that they needed to forfeit those opportunities, because their legacy would be "erasing women from sports." They agreed. Rob told his players he had a plan, but needed them to buy him some time.

After narrowly missing a gunshot from the head from Gwen, who was up in the rafters with a sniper rifle, Rob then spoke with Alex one-on-one. Alex, now going by "Alexia" told his coach that while he thinks biological males competing with females is clearly wrong, that he is a woman, and that all those years playing basketball, he never quite felt like himself. Working at the drag diner, "The Dollhouse" made him feel like himself for the first time in his life, and this is who is really is. He then told Rob that his parents have never been more proud of him.

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Coach Rob tells Alex that what they are doing with women's sports is nothing to be proud of, that he's not a woman, but a lost man in a lost world with shitty parents, and a bad coach. He then tells Alex that they did wrong by him by going along with the lie and not telling him the truth. After Alex asks Rob, "How can you be sure I'm not a woman?" Rob punches Alex in his Ladyballs.

As the second half is about to begin, Blaine Crain decides to grab the mic from the announcer and propose to the Hawkettes players that he had supposedly impregnated with his brother Jack. Jack and Blaine then got in a fight in the middle of the court before a "Cowgirls" player shoved them onto the announcers desk.

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David confronted this player, who was then pants'ed by Felix, revealing his peepee to the audience.

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The audience recoiled in horror and fascination at the large, black snake before them, including the coomer guy from earlier and Andrew Klavan (another Daily wire Cameo). This HAD to be in the movie, as many American Conservatives are OBSESSED with black peepeees.

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As the second half is about to begin, Coach Rob comes up with a 5-D chess plan to beat the "Cowgirls." He brings his daughter's girls basketball team to the court. During the second half, Gwen approached Rob and tell him that she won't "cancel" him after all, but that their work together had come to an end, and she will also never have s*x with him.

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As the girls are so adorable, the black dudes have no choice but to let them win. The crowd goes wild as the little girls overcome a massive point deficit, in a heartwarming game.

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JUST KIDDING. DEM BOYS STYLED ON EM

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NINE MONTHS LATER

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The Crain boys reopened their dealership, making it into a youth sports center. We also see that Alex is living as a man once again, and Rob and Dharby have expressed a mutual interest in getting back together. Coach Rob gave a speech at the grand reopening, talking about the importance of doing the right thing over winning.

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We then see that Kris is stalking them outside of the youth center, looking totally unhinged and photographing them in his car. Kris then removes his wig and is revealed to be NONE OTHER THAN GIGA-TRANSPHOBE MATT WALSH HIMSELF, accompanied by Candace Owens.

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While Candace is confused as to how Matt Walsh LARPING as a hippy and boning some guy's ex-wife had ANYTHING to do with the plot of the story in ANY WAY whatsoever, Matt begins laughing maniacally.

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THE END!

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CAST

Jeremy Boreing

After moving from Texas to Los Angeles to start his acting career, Jeremy Boreing met young conservative columnist Ben Shapiro during the early 2000s, and the two eventually started the "Daily Wire" in 2015. The DW's flagship program, "The Ben Shapiro Show," elevated the burgeoning news outlet to unprecedented success, with the rise of the organization paralleling the rise of Shapiro and his orbiters, each of which have developed a following of their own, and are featured in this movie. Jeremy has used the success of the Daily Wire to branch out into other forms of media. It looks like with the early success of this film, we can expect more chud comedies in the future.

Daniel Considine as Alex/ Alexia Cruise

This guy is some noname actor and producer, according to IMDB.

Jake Crain as Jake Crain

Blain Crain as Blain Crain

David Cone as David Cone

I lumped these three together, as they have a Daily Wire show together that talks about sportsball. I've never heard of them until I saw this movie.

Tyler Fischer as Felix/ Shelix

An NYC-based comedian and content creator, and has some future projects in the works at Daily Wire. He's a chud comedian that is good at pretending to be a soyboy twink. Tyler Fischer plays "Felix," an annoying and weird towel boy that the team picks as a fifth player. His only purpose in this movie is to be "hehe silly beardo manlet," like a shittier version of Zak Galifinakis.

Bliie Rae Brandt as Gwen Wilde

Bilie Rae Brandt is a men's wellness and dating "social media influencer." She plays Gwen Wilde, an unhinged BPD "career woman" who blackmails Rob throughout the film.

Lexi Contursi as Dharby Gibson

Lexi Contursi is an actress, dancer, and piano player, known for minor roles in "La La Land" and "Ted 2." She plays "Dharby," the unfortunately named MILF and soon to be ex wife of Coach Rob.

Matt Walsh as "Kris"

Matt Walsh began his career as a radio host in the early 2010's, before working for Glenn Beck's "Blaze Media" in 2014. He also began contributing for the Huffington Post and began writing at the Daily Wire in 2017. In 2018, Walsh started his podcast on YouTube, being part of the Daily Wire's network of shows. In the beginning, Matt Walsh trailed significantly behind the more established Michael Knowles and Andrew Klavan. This would change in 2022, when Matt became the face of the "Frick :!marseytrain:s" movement, releasing his groundbreaking "What is a Woman" documentary, which netted him the coveted "Transphobe of the Year Award" for 2022. He has since eclipsed the others to be the second most popular host on the "Wire," only being surpassed by Ben Shapiro himself.

Walsh plays "Kris," the granola butt hippy that is dating Rob's soon to be ex-wife. Kris is easily my favorite character, and I can tell Matt Walsh really enjoyed playing him, although I was disappointed that "Kris" was a psyop the entire time.

Brett Cooper as "Stacey Santiago-O'Brian"

Brett Cooper is a young female clone of Ben Shapiro (kind of like X-23 and Wolverine) She was created in a laboratory as a project in 2020 to win over zoomers on tiktok, and was unleashed on the internet in 2022, complete with a studio set designed to look like a normal girl's room. Most of Brett Coopers fans are not zoomers, however, but coomer chud simps that want to nut on her big eyebrows.

In this film, she plays "Stacey Santiago-O'Brian," a local news anchor who gets publicly admonished by her colleague on-air, and is forced to undergo sensitivity training, along with her co-anchor, Drake Diamond.

Michael Knowles as "Drake Diamond"

There is a running joke at the Daily Wire that everyone who works there fricking hates Michael Knowles, especially Ben Shapiro. A Yale Graduate, Knowles leveraged his friendship with a classmate into appearing on his classmates father's show, a Daily Wire host by the name of Andrew Klavan. Knowles would build a small following with his appearances and first entered the public chud spotlight with his book, "Reasons to vote for Democrats: A Comprehensive Guide," a 200-page book full of empty pages. He went on to have his own show on the "Daily Wire" and be a regular contributor to Fox News until 2019, when he was blacklisted for making fun of Greta Thunberg.

In this film, he plays "Drake Diamond," a local news anchor who gets publicly admonished by his colleague on-air, and is forced to undergo sensitivity training, along with his co-anchor, Stacey Santiago-O'Brian.

Cameos by:

Ben Shapiro, plays a referee.
Andrew Klavan, plays an audience member in the finals.
Ted Cruz, plays himself.
Some others I probably missed.

FINAL SCORE:

5.5 / 10

80
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So its not Scary Movie good but its not Meet the Spartans bad.

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