When normies have loud s*x, I'm playing Baby Shark or Rickroll or some shit on repeat at my loudest. I'm done being nice. I will let them know that I can hear them, because they already know I can. They're just banking on the fact that I won't say or do anything. But I will. Thanks for the idea @universal
Intution
The concept of having a “sixth sense” is paradoxical. If you feel iffy about something and don't do it, you'll usually never know whether you were right or wrong. There are exceptions of course. You can have a bad feeling about your mom, and then realize she has cancer that day.
Today I had one of those moments. I wanted to go to the beach to collect shells. It rained so I didn't go. I also wanted to stop at a shack at the beach that has some absolutely legendarily yummy food, even for veganbros. Alas, I was thwarted.
I wanted to go to the weed dispensary to get some bud instead (having not hit bong in ages). I got struck with the strongest sense of “don't do it” I've felt in my life, and it was related to driving. I feel like if I drove, I would be mangled right this very moment.
I've hinted at it a few in my posts, but I had a car accident that totaled my vehicle this year. It's made me afraid of driving but I don't really live somewhere where I have the luxury of crawling away from driving. Being an adult is strongly tied to driving in addition to the whole place not being pedestrian-friendly at all.
I got in my car and my music refused to sync with my car system. Whatever. I started driving and the dread was so strong I turned back and went home. This wasn't fear. It was like that feeling of someone staring at you from behind. Now did I dodge a horror or was I being a little b-word? We'll never know.
Do you relate? Ever had something similar happen where you didn't do something because of instinct and not fear?
On a side note, I have a Quest 3 and nothing to do with it. SWERF so no porn.
Ethan Crumbley
I relate a lot to Ethan Crumbley. Not because of his violence, but his mind filled with violent imagery. I see it too, Ethan. The difference is that I see it on myself. That white flesh exposed just white until a minute later, the blood floods like a leaky tap.
Leaky tap is the right metaphor. It feels like your leg is broken, your brain is broken, reality is broken. To not do it right now is a massive feat. The pain would hurt so good. It would overwhelm me, sometimes enough give me a panic attack.
I deserve the pain, the self-destruction. Evil flows through my veins, and all I do is wrong. I'm a bad person, and those who hurt me should be rewarded for their good deeds. Not one cut, not two. Four, five, then the half-assed first aid.
I'm a waste Ethan, we both are, we both should be chucked into the bin. I'm garbage, I'm trash, I want to overdose so badly.
Today, I'd like to discuss Ethan, the Oxford shooting, and a few things that went wrong. I'm doing it. Fewer Holly and some will be repeats because my brain is dead from all the pills no joke. Plus I need space for for the story. I think there's like 20 image limit.
The Birth of Ethan Crumbley
Crumbley is a Florida Man that moved to Massachusets a few years after his birth. This move disrupeted his regular development and ability to make friends. His parents also left him alone for long periods.
This is something mentioned by neigbours who have stated that the kid was ocasionally left overnight and instructed to make his own supper. He would also scream, and ocasionally knock at neighbors doors crying.
A bunch of sick shit happened during his childhood years. Red flag is an understatement. Let's talk about schools not giving a shit. I used to write about self-harm in high school. The school took the essays and published them in the newsletter as “good writing”. Uhm, I'm literally telling you I'm hurting myself habitually and I received praise. And back then it was pure cat scratches (i.e. just using a compass to scratch myself until I bleed).
You like my writing now, Mrs Pet? Oh wait, you're fricking dead. Shitty school counsellor. Your death will be nothing but a story to me as well. I should write about it and mail it to her children but I lack the vindictiveness. I might send this whole thing to her though although it would inevitably have police knocking at my door even though I've committed no crime except share literature.
Here's my gripe. I was left to suffer. When that suffering resulted in behavior that inconvenienced them, I got punished. What?! Frick off. As an adult I can't imagine treating anyone's child that way, yet alone one I was being paid to take care of. If I knew a child was hurting themselves, I'd take that as the purpose of my life to end my suffering.
I got sent to a counsellor who told me “well, you don't have to say anything if you don't want to” and that was the end of it. Never, ever, ever brought up again except to publish. Yes, at 28 as I process the cruelty of the adults of my childhood I am upset. These were my first encounters with genuine, unmitigated, “I don't give a frick despite my ability to and I don't care to justify it” malice.
I have 0 ill-will against peers. We were all growing up, and I probably harmed more kids than the reverse. That is my cross to bear, and I'm sorry. For peers who hurt me, you are forgiven. You couldn't have done better even if you wanted to. Doing worse was the pathway to doing better. The adults who knew? As much blood on your hands as there was on mine today as far as I'm concerned. A baby human came to you for help and you fricked them off. I can't think of a worse crime.
And don't post triggering content in a fricking newsletter for teens you fricking idiots. I can't fathom how many people learned how to hurt themselves from this or were triggered to start hurting themselves again, even if they only have the story in memory.
Ethan Crumbley's Red Flag
Crumbley didn't have red flags. They were crimson, something like the tail of a charmandar always following him around. This was not was not a child that should have been in a regular school, and it is evident and I'm probably not the first to point this out.
The report tries to not blame folks, but it's hard not to.
The first is a dead bird's head he kept in a jar. He eventually left it at school where it was discovered and caused great uproar in the school. Was it occult? An omen? Who would do something so perverse?
A deer head was also found, along with graffiti, but this was not an act from Crumbley. The graffiti was likely kids attempting to jump off the building hype surrounding the occult and the school. ]
There have also been reports that Crumbley had a countdown to November 30. This is not true. No students knew of the incoming shooting prior to the event.
As the report reveals
First, the data: During the 2021-22 school year, leading up to the shooting, the average daily attendance at OHS was 93% of students present/ On November 30, just over 93% of students were reported present, slightly higher than the daily average. Reported absent from OHS on November 30 were 112 students out of approximately 1,708 enrolled students.
Crumbley had had interactions with the counsellor prior but these was routine and nothing of note was found. Following that there were minor incidents, including with the Spanish teacher who noted that Crumbley said his family is “useless” or something to that effect. It should be noted that the counsellor's memories don't always align with those of others, which is a trend you'll see throughout the report.
The mention of “false recollection” is usually code for “is bullpooping”. They never say anyone is lying but they do point out that someone's account doesn't make sense or is contradicted by someone else.
So let's start with the nonsense of the day before and on the attack. Your jaw will drop when you realise exactly how things went down. This is a 500 page document I'm drawing from so forgive me, but for this day, I'm using bullet (kek) points. Also, he gets the Voldemort treatment but frick off you know his name.
in the first period he pulled out a bullet and showed it to his teacher Kubina who was shocked but did not report it
In the same class he was found looking at images of bullets on his phone
2nd period - “One of those students told police after the shooting that when he and the other student asked the Shooter if he wanted to be the person to write for the group, the Shooter did not respond. This student then saw the Shooter pretend to hold a gun. The student did not pay any attention to this gesture by the Shooter at the time.”
In period 4, Kubina finally reports the bullet to Hopkins and Ejak (Dean)
“ Hopkins testified that he wrote, “I'll be touching base with him as well” because he saw that the original email was sent to two other staff members and he “was planning on being involved with the other two staff members.””
The kid brought bullets to school and showed them to his teacher in first base. That isn't a “I'll touch base with him” moment. It's school lockdown moment you dumb fricks. This is like going on a date and just carrying condoms in your hand and your date acts shocked when you wanna fugg at the end.
Eventually, Crumbley is sent to Pam Fine who's some anti-bullying officer. She asks him and he says he and his mom like shooting. The report points out the obvious and the same thing that happened to me
Had they asked the Shooter more about his shooting-range hobby, they may have discovered that his parents recently bought a handgun for him or his use at the range, which in turn may have provided greater context for Hopkins the next day when he again found himself dealing with concerning behavior by the Shooter.
Also
Neither Fine nor Hopkins searched the Shooter or his backpack during the meeting, nor did they ask him for consent to search. Which blows my mind. We don't know if he was strapped that day. He very well may have been.
We're in fourth period now. Fine calls his mom, then we get the whole “don't get caught” textl spiel between the two. In period five, you're going to love this one.
On cross-examination by the Shooter's attorneys, Dr. Anacker testified that the Shooter told her that at some point during the school day on November 29, 2021 he wrote in his journal that he was going to do the shooting the next day. It seems likely that the journal entry quoted above is the entry that the Shooter described to Dr. Anacker.
We're past crimson. We're devil-red.
Social media
Maybe that's normal in burgerland but most 15yos aren't posting pistols online.
Day of shooting
In registration class, the following occured:
During this class, Karpinski noticed that the Shooter was watching a video on his
phone in class that depicted a person shooting other people, shown from the gunman's
perspective
She alerts Fine and Karpinski but “Karpinski did not see the Shooter's behavior in watching this video (or viewing an image of bullets) as indicative of potential violence toward himself or others, but she thought it reflected a change in his typical personal behavior. Once again, we note that by promptly reporting concerning student behavior, Karpinski acted appropriately under the
circumstances.”
During math, he wrote weird stuff on a math test. His teacher went to the front office, causing him to be called to Ejak, but he had scratched away the majority of the disturbing content on his paper already. His parents were called and sent her the pictures. Both parents arrive, and they discuss the disturbing content before Ethan's backpack (with the weapon of murder) was retrieved but not searched.
His parents left, and it's noted that “Neither parent hugged or touched their son, or even said goodbye to him”.
There was a breakdown of communication. Stringing together everything in the past few days should have been important, at least enough to search him, but it wasn't. The student was allowed to returned to class and a based moment happened:
“While walking into Jasinski's classroom that day, a student said, “I wish it was the last day of school” (referring to the last day of school before the December holiday break). This student told police that the Shooter responded, “Don't worry, it is the last day of school.””
Then this conga line of shit happened:
- a student interviewed by police after the shooting said that the Shooter showed him a live round and one or two empty bullet casings. This student said that another student grabbed the live round out of the Shooter's hand and held it up as if to show the teacher, and the Shooter grabbed it back and put it away in his pocket or backpack. According to police
notes, this student also said that the Shooter asked him if he (the student) had earplugs; he thought that the Shooter had a hearing sensitivity and that was the reason for his
question. The Shooter also asked this student and the other two students at their classroom table again what classes they had during fifth hour.
- Another student in Jasinski's fourth-hour history class told law enforcement after the shooting that a friend of his showed him real bullets on the day of the shooting. After this
student saw the bullets, he saw his friend give the bullets back to the Shooter. There is no evidence that Jasinski saw the Shooter displaying ammunition in class that day or any
other day
- Another student in the Shooter's fourth hour World History class also heard the Shooter's comment about that day being the last day of school. Specifically, this student told police
that he heard the student described above say that he wished it was Christmas break and that the Shooter responded by saying that it was the last day of school. There is no
evidence that this student reported this statement to anyone at OHS prior to the shooting.
- This student also stated that near the end of the fourth hour class period (after lunch), the Shooter asked him and two others what classes they would be in during fifth and seventh
hours. After they told him where they would be, this student asked the Shooter why he wanted to know, but the Shooter did not respond.
The shooting (crumbley's perspective)
After the fourth period, he entererd the bathroom and cocked his gun, causing the kids there to shit themselves more. They were not killed
After exiting the First Bathroom with his gun, the Shooter shot and wounded seven OHS students, two of them fatally, in the span of only seven seconds. We believe that the last
best chance to prevent the shooting had already passed, when Counselor Shawn Hopkins and Dean Nick Ejak allowed the Shooter to return to his third-hour class with his
backpack, unaware that the backpack contained a gun and ammunition. When the Shooter emerged from the First Bathroom, no one could have prevented these first seven
victims from being shot, short of having a security officer in this bathroom or immediately outside it, ready to thwart the Shooter before he used his weapon
Once he began, Crumbley was ceaseless with his onslaught. He turned the corner, saw Phoebe and Eli first, and shot Phoebe in the face, though she survived. He then fired at a a group of girls, injuring Hana who was shot multiple times. One of his most tragic victims is Madisyn who he killed in the south 200 hallway but would not be let into the classroom out of fear. She was shot at close range by Crumbley.
There had been no announcement of the shooting so not everyone knew yet. Tate entered hall 200 from the courtyard and was murdered at close range from Crumbley. The last victim was Justin who was. In the bathroom. When Crumbley entered, he and Keegan noted his dead eyes. Keegan slowly walked away. Pots, an armed adult, creaked the door open for two seconds before fricking off. Crumbley then shot Justin at close range.
Sorry for the shitty post. Pills(no, not benzos) got me zombied up. Hard to not sleep all the time. In the next post we discuss the entire shooting and what the adults did lol so far we have
not enter the bathroom with the gunman
Not let in Hana who was shot and killed
It gets pretty bad and Pots is just the tip of the iceberg.
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Yakety Sax is a good one.
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