Sort by controversial for maximum drama, I was too lazy to edit the URL accordingly on mobile
This, is god darn hilarious. Personally, I not only wake up and get high everyday, I am quite literally high 24 hours a day. when I wake up in the middle of the night, I go take dabs then go back to bed. I’m the epitome of your “problem”.
I am having the best year of my life both career and personal wise. Just cracked 6 figures for the first time with a month and a half left for the year, and am in the healthiest spot mentally I’ve been in since I’ve been an adult. Just because a lifestyle doesn’t work for you, doesn’t mean it can’t/won’t work for someone else
Concentrated cope in its purest form 
Nah weed MAKES life worth living man, some of us are more complicated than some corporate npc personality and we actually like/need the effects of weed to actually get us through the day. Call it weakness I call it vitamins man, it’s medication, you don’t NEED it but if you found something that got rid of your headaches, kept you relaxed and it dosent end up as bad as heroin, or some shitty prescription drug to zonk you out then why the frick not use it.
Yes some people can abuse weed but a lot of us don’t and actually function on it. You dumb motherlovers who think this is cartoon world and you think we are as 2D as you can get fricked lol
Dude, weed lmao
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Bruh. Ofc you think you do a better job when you smoked one. Your heart rate is through the roof. And you probably do half a set and forget the rest. This nonce is gonna try a squat while high and either shit himself or die of a stroke because his blood pressure just popped his aorta.
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I can see the form from hwre
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This guy is only half as r-slurred as an old highschool buddy. He was convinced that if you are on antibiotics and then get hammered you have a 50/50 shot of being instantly cured...
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Да, товарищ. This is advanced Russian medical knowledge.
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This works for me but I skip the part with antibiotics.
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Had to spot a dude who was high, he couldn’t figure out how much he wanted to bench and spent like 5 mins trying to add the plates up… luls
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At least alcoholics who start the morning off drinking know they're pieces of shit
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r/cripplingalcoholism is the only self-aware subreddit on the entire site, it's amazing. Maybe there really is something to alcohol
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It's the only good subreddit these people are killing themselves in real time and they're somehow still more human than Redditors
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I stopped using caffeine today and it’s going poorly.
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Beancels anonymous
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Excedrin brah, 1 pill has 65mg caffeine, it will keep the headaches at bay and a low enough dose that it helps you ween off.
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Drink green tea. It contains L-Theanine, which calms your nerves, and you can find variants with only 25mg of caffeine. You could also just take theanine on it's own until the caffeine withdrawals go away.
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People call me crazy/good for not drinking coffee but the truth is that it doesn’t work for me.
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Just buy a pack and smoke the last cigarette, it will be easy to quit after that.
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being depressed because your parents told you to stop smoking: a weedcel origin story
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Literally "I know I'm not addicted because I do it every day and don't want to stop". Most intelligent stoner detected
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Fricking dabs... "hey man. You like dabs man? Wanna do some dabs, bro?" Dabs sound like something you should be overdosing in a back ally on. Leave it to weedcels to make their pot consumption seem as sketchy and drug addictish as possible as soon as it starts to gain more mainstream acceptance
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The people I knew who were heavily into dabs legitimately became r-slurred
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Same but with booze.
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Most boozers acknowledge they have a drinking problem though, they just won't do anything to fix it. Potheads can't even bring themselves to admit that they're addicts.
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Out of every drug addict group, stoners are the most annoying and least self-aware. Even bartards know they're r-slurs and have entertaining stories (just keep an eye on your wallet). Stimstrags are kind of irritating if you're not on their level, but a lot of them are genuinely productive. Alcoholics are based and know they're killing themselves. Psych heads can be really slur-tarded with hippie bullshit but it's not a universal truth like it is for stoners, some of them are just cool old guys that grow shrooms in their garage.
I would genuinely rather hang out at the local park with methhead homeless neighbors than sit awkwardly with a stoner as they mumble some dumb shit at me while watching cartoons.
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Stim addicts are either sucking peepee for crack/meth or post-human masters of the gigatweaker grindset. It's 50/50. There's a reason that special operations and combat pilots use "go pills". If stims are used for productive goals, they're incredibly useful.
Bartards will always hold a special place in my heart because they're the most entertaining addicts by far. Stoners just devour trash food and think they've solved the problems of the world, bartards rob pharmacies, crash stolen cars, and get in fights with cops.
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I fricking hate stoners.
I'm sorry, I don't have a single funny or insightful thing to add here, I just really fricking hate stoners with every fiber of my being. Even the worst alcoholics I've met have all been completely open about the fact they have a problem, but stoners will literally tell you straight-faced "just because I literally cannot function without weed 24/7 doesn't mean I'm addicted!"
I don't even have a problem with mj in general, if someone wants to chill with the occasional joint or edible I don't care, but people who make it a lifestyle have failed as human beings.
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Based Sigma Cracksetter
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Neurodivergent People Shouldn't Have Rights. I understand this sounds extremely messed up, but please hear me out. Approach this with an open-mind, and then see how you feel. You may be surprised.
Let me preface this by saying, I believe all humans should have basic universal rights, and I'm even a vegan because I believe all sentient beings should have basic rights.
Neurodivergent people do not follow logically from this. I don't know how society has become so uninformed on the autism spectrum. There have been a countless amount of peer-reviewed studies that demonstrate beyond any reasonable doubt that neurodivergent people are not sentient beings. They have no self-awareness, can not perceive pain, emotions, etc. For all intents and purposes, they are biological machines. This is just science. If you disagree with me, you're disagreeing with all those peer-reviewed studies.
Now, if something isn't even a conscious being, why does it deserve rights? Watch me get downvoted for stating facts.
Snapshots:
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Quite the dramatic take, snappy
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In every weed bro thread there is a lawyer or doctor who works over 9000 hours a week and smokes daily just hanging out on the Reddit sidelines waiting to tell you that it TOTALLY doesn’t everyone a lazy pos.
For how hard these guys work they do sure seem to be on Reddit a lot
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