EFFORTPOST The Requiem of MoonMetropolis. A lesson on why you should put effort into your trolling.

If there is one thing I despise, it would be "low-effort" trolling. I see it all over this site. Today I am going to start enforcing consequences.

https://rdrama.net/post/308178/you-are-all-useless/7166452#context

Now it all starts when the user, @BooMetropolis enters my thread. He does nothing but spam emojis. A technique that was funny back during my amateur days of trolling, but one that I grew out of before I even left middle school. I tried to reason with him for a few comments to give him a chance to be more creative. He did not listen and continued to spam. When faced with a spammer there are multiple ways to counter them. I prefer finding a lower effort way to spam. Once I googled his name and discovered that he proudly displays his name and face for all to see. This only serves to make my job easier.

I instantly begin counter spamming. While he has to manually search for an emoji, I simply press ctrl-v and respond with his own face.

As I work from home and treat trolling as one of my passions it will be easy to counter spam him with his own face. But I will not stop there. Normally I would, but this guy considers himself a skilled troll. And yet he resorts to amateurish tactics? Disgusting. He needs to learn.

Before I explain what I did next, there is something one should know about me. I do not get off to porn, and I only release myself once per week in order to peak my testosterone. Moon's most major mistake was messing with me on a release day when my test is peaking. I also only ever get off to my imagination, and my own erotic novels that I have written and self-published. The next thing one should know is that I have mastered multiple forms of meditation, primarily focus meditation. One of the ways I have trained this is by releasing in the same exact spot on the wall for nearly a decade. I always place a target to prevent stains, and I can hit it from over 3 feet away now without even looking.

Why is this relevant? Because I released all over MoonMetropolis's face.

Your first response is probably going to be "Isn't that gay?!?" A response that is easily countered. Because you see, I was not thinking about Moon at all, my thoughts were focused entirely on his mother and my original story that I wrote about her. I simply stuck his face to the spot on the wall where I normally aim for and by controlling my thoughts I came all over him in the most heterosexual fashion. Below is the story I wrote and used as my inspiration. I wrote this in about 45 minutes, and was still on the clock when I wrote it meaning I made more today writing that story about riding Moon's mom than he made at all today. This is something called "effortless mastery". Years of work trolling the ff14 ERP community put on full display for all to see.

Sognara stared at the screen, his fingers hovering above the keyboard as "Moon" spammed emojis. It was a typical online spat, but for Sognara, this wasn't just about winning a digital war of words. He was disgusted by the low effort that his fellow "troll" was putting out. He decided it was time for a requiem. He googled Moon's name and instantly found his name and face. "Some people put no effort into their cybersecurity..." Sognara said smugly to himself as he stood up from the desk.

For you see, Sognara was not an ordinary troll. He had mystical powers that gave him the upper hand in more than just trolling. His eyes narrowed as an idea began to form in his mind. After a few keystrokes, Sognara's screen flickered, tapping into something beyond cyberspace. Through the glow of his monitor, he could see the dimly lit room where Joshua sat typing furiously. But his gaze shifted, zeroing in on the woman moving through the house in the background—Joshua's mother. A grin crept onto Sognara's face. She would be the key to his next move.

With a few whispered words, his power surged through the connection. In Joshua's home, a strange aura enveloped his mother. She paused in the kitchen, her hands trembling as she gripped the counter. Her body began to change—stretching, expanding, until she towered over the room, her head brushing the ceiling. She gasped in shock, trying to steady herself as she realized what had happened.

Joshua, oblivious, continued typing at his computer, wasting his entire life away, spamming emojis because there wasn't a single creative thought flowing through his thick skull.

Sognara wasted no time. With a surge of energy, he projected himself into Joshua's home. His form materialized near his mother, and without a second thought, he leaped onto her back, gripping a lock of her now massive hair like reins.

"Let's give your son a little wake-up call," Sognara chuckled, pulling on her hair as if steering her like a mount.

His mother tried to resist, but Sognara's will was too strong, her eyes wide with confusion and panic, moved forward, her huge feet thudding against the floor with each step. Sognara dug his heels into her sides, urging her toward Joshua's room.

As they approached, the walls of the hallway trembled. The floor groaned beneath her weight, and without hesitation, Sognara guided her to kick through the door. The force sent wood splintering into the room, causing Joshua to spin around, his face contorting in disbelief as he saw his now enormous mother standing in the doorway, Sognara perched smugly on her back.

"What the—?!" Joshua stammered, standing up from his desk, his hands shaking.

"Hey, Joshua," Sognara called, his grin widening. "Still think you're the best troll around?"

Joshua's mother, in her dazed state, stumbled forward, her massive hands flailing as Sognara guided her into the room. Her foot came crashing down on Joshua's desk, shattering it into pieces. His computer went flying across the room, sparks flying as it hit the wall.

"Mom?!" Joshua screamed, running toward her, but Sognara yanked on her hair, steering her out of the room. The giantess clumsily moved through the house, knocking over furniture and smashing through walls as Sognara spurred her on like a wild horse.

The house began to crumble under her weight, each movement sending tremors through the foundation. Sognara cackled heartily as they smashed through the kitchen, the giantess' hand accidentally sweeping dishes and appliances off the counters as she tried to regain her balance.

Joshua ran after them, helpless as the destruction unfolded before him. "Stop! What are you doing?!"

Sognara turned to face him, smirking. "You thought you could out-troll me? This is what happens when you mess with the master."

With one final command, Sognara guided the giantess toward the front of the house. Her foot slammed into the wall, creating a gaping hole as the structure gave way. The roof began to collapse, dust and debris filling the air.

As they stepped into the yard, Sognara gave one last laugh before jumping off her back, landing nimbly on the ground. The giantess shrank back to her normal size, collapsing into the grass, dazed and exhausted.

Sognara gave Joshua a mocking salute before he snapped his fingers, vanishing back into the digital void, leaving Joshua standing in the wreckage of his home, stunned and speechless.

With this blow dealt, I will now easily when the battle of wills and beat him at his own game. He will eventually realize that he can't out spam me when it takes me less effort to simply paste his face. If this continues to the point where I get bored of this I will hire an Indian to join the site and I will pay him 20 dollars per month to reply to any comments directed at me with his face until he gives up. That is called the power of having a job.

For the rest of you who lack creativity or who put no effort into your work I want you to consider this a warning. That is all for today.