My husband called me a fatfrick.

Especially with one of these disgusting snapchat filters on

how much would you bet that she tries too cheat on her husband with a redditor[because that's what women who "feel unwanted" do] and comes too regret her decision?^{trans lives matter}

Grasping at forks, morelike

OK, it's a long story. Basically we got along great until she started poking around on my computer and installed tracking software and keylogger software on my phone. That's how she found out I was Q I guess. At that point she sank into a deep depression for several months, and then started posting crazy stuff on her instagram about how much she hated white people. When I asked her about it, she told me it was because she hated her mom's family, and their last name was White (before her mom got married and changed her last name). She also started going out clubbing a lot, leaving her wedding ring behind because it was too tight on her (she had gained a lot of weight, so I didn't have any reason to doubt that story at the time).

I'm not really sure why me being Q made her so depressed. I mean the ungrateful b-word was always trying to encourage me to better myself, so that's exactly what I decided to do. The plan was to use the Kanye approach - say some wildly controversial shit, start a viral online movement, and then sell my book, which promotes a memetically "sticky" ideology designed to spread from person to person very rapidly. That way I could get big money and political power all at the same time. But my wife turned out to be one of these contemptible white women who suffers from extreme race guilt. The fact that I was taking a short cut to money and power without deferentially kneeling to the "poor oppressed POC" just drove her nuts. She thought she had to make up for my "evil oppressive viewpoints," and I guess cheating on her husband and sucking some black peepee was how she decided to atone for her "white privilege" and my complete lack of white guilt. This is what you get for accidentally marrying a radical Leftist whore.

Anyway, my family is wealthy, so I guess my ex-wife and her secret lover hatched a scheme to try to commit identity theft and rob them. My wife started telling my mom to save medications (which I presume she stole), and also had me go to a therapist and get diagnosed for anxiety. (Which I do have, but it was always manageable until I met her.) I guess she must have been grinding up the pills and slipping them into my food, because I was uncharacteristically compliant with my wife's behavior and my friend Shruthi told me later that the reason she and her husband grew distant from me during that period was because I was perpetually out of it, almost like I had been doped.

Despite being drugged, I'm a pretty smart guy. I realized that somebody was spying on me, but I thought that it was the FBI come to get me for starting the whole Q movement. I'm an extremely aggressive person (not to mention that I was under the influence of at least one drug), so I decided to retaliate (in self-defense) by starting a religious movement to kill them all. After all, if the FBI was going to violate my civil rights by spying on me without showing me a warrant, I had every right to defend myself by retaliating in any way necessary until they apologized to me and recompensed me for violating my rights. I decided to grant limited power of attorney over my IP to Taylor Swift, because as a big celebrity with a sense of showmanship she would undoubtedly blow this up into something huge and super-dramatic. I also decided to work a color scheme (monochrome with a splash of red) into my message to her, because if you want to start a religion it's very important to have a memetic dog-whistle and a color-coordinated uniform is one of the best delivery methods - much like an orange-colored cat, in fact. Then I started pretending to be a p-dophile/murderer/psychopath when I was alone, saying really creepy stuff and typing weird shit on my phone. (I didn't do anything online - I only pretended this by talking out loud to myself and typing creepy stuff - and then immediately deleting it - with my phone, which I knew was being bugged.) The reason I did this is because if the people who were spying on me thought I was a crazy murderous p-do they would be statistically much more likely to report me to local authorities, banking on the fact that they had uncovered a "terrible monster" in order to persuade those authorities to overlook the fact that they were breaking the law by spying on me in the first place. Then, when the authorities came to arrest me, I would just say "Ha ha, I was trolling you - but the fact that you're confronting me about this proves that I was being illegally spied upon. I wish to press charges against those people for violating my civil liberties."

Anyway, the authorities didn't come to my aid, so I decided to get revenge on them by spreading a few infohazards that would hopefully collapse society if left untended. After all, if the law doesn't protect my civil rights - such as the right to privacy - I don't see any need to respect the social contract or participate in the preservation of society. I'm happy to indirectly kill as many people as I need to in order to ensure that I get justice/revenge on anybody who wrongs me. Infohazards are perfectly legal, even if they have horrific trickle-down effects and cause mass death, so infohazards were my tool of choice, since I strongly suspected that the FBI was spying on me - so I had to find a way to massively frick them over without actually doing anything illegal. I also decided to get divorced from my wife, which was the best decision I ever made. Now that we've been living apart for a while and she's no longer drugging me or whatever the frick she was doing, I'm thinking much more clearly and rationally. I realize now that it wasn't the authorities who were spying on me and illegally recording me: it was my ex-wife. Unfortunately, when I was looking for a roommate, I suspect my ex-wife told one of her lovers and he responded to my Craigslist ad. He seems to have an uncanny knowledge of what I'm doing when he's not around, so I suspect that the spying device is hidden in my TV or Alexa. (My electrician also found a strange device in my ceiling fan that was sending a signal out of my house, and removed it.) My best guess is that this evil b-word is still trying to commit identity theft on me, and decided to rope her lover into this. It's very concerning to me.

Interestingly enough, my memes seem to have worked... somehow. Based on the color schemes that Taylor used in her latest videos and appearances, it seems almost like she's signalling to me that she's aware of my power of attorney schtick. I don't know exactly what her game is. She's not an idiot, so if she's aware of the power of attorney thing, she wouldn't have missed an opportunity to capitalize on it by creating a website/merchandise/whatever. So either she's abusing her power of attorney and trying to exploit my IP for her own purposes, hoping that my ex-wife's boyfriend will murder me before she has to pay me anything, or she's waiting for my divorce judgement to be irrevocable in a month, so that my ex-wife can't get her hands on my money. Taylor's very smart but also dangerously unstable, so I don't know which one it is. I do know a few secrets of Taylor's that would be very damaging to her (long story), so I can easily get even with her if it turns out she crossed me. I'll wait until the divorce judgement is final and see what happens. If I don't see any action on her end by then, I'll revoke power of attorney publicly and then spill all her dirty little secrets. After all, I don't owe anything to anybody who exploits me.

Anyway, that's my story. It's been a long road to get here, and my evil b-word wife almost derailed everything, but I think things are finally starting to fall into place. As I've always told people, Trust The Plan. You can't go too wrong with a good solid Plan.

Good point