Did you know that the bathtub was first marketed in north america as a horse trough and dog scalder?

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Hello Vsauce Michael Here!

It's ok, we still have u/watermelon_bubblegum to fill our quota of mentally impaired butthole exhibitionists

Your guys' obsession with me will never cease to amaze me.

Who is your favorite Steven Universe character?

Peridot, she fuckin rules

Mine is Rock

That's pretty vague, considering all the gems are rocks I'll just assume they're all your favorite

That's true.

I guess my favorite one is Concrete Enema

You're so funny.

Thanks

I'd like to put a straw in your pupil and drink the fluid of your eye ball.

Wow, now there's a kink even I haven't heard of!

I was complimenting you :(

Okay

You're too pure for this subreddit

Yes I know

You seem cool.

Did someone really just say that in r/drama? I'm astounded, thanks

it begins again

Yeah we're cool with you when you aren't making an ass of yourself.

I'm not concerned whether you're cool with me or not

rude

You really don't get this place. If someone gives you a hard time just tell them they're the load their mother should have swallowed.

Why would I do that? Lol I don't give a shit what's being said about me

Lol I don't give a shit what's being said about me

Yet you keep getting baited into threads.

What bait? I come when I'm called and my username was mentioned! So here I am, that doesn't mean I give a shit that just means I have fun engaging you

I'm imagine a response akin to "oh no don't bait me daddy"

I'm not saying "oh no!" I always come around when I'm called! And I wouldn't say daddy, I only call my fiance daddy

Cuck him and post bussy

Wait a sec...

Omfg hahaha you guys just cannot grasp the concept of polyamory!

Nobody has difficulty understand wanting a wallet with a sex toy attached, they just all wish they could have their own.

Wallet with a sex toy attached...? Wtf are you even talking about?

concept of polyamory!

Actually I do grasp it and its kinda fucked, and I say this as a swinger. I find most poly people are just pretty slutty but don't like to be thought of as sluts and go with the poly label cause they are like totally in love but have primaries and "secondaries" etc.

Fuck that, I'm a slut, my wife is occasionally a slut, we fuck people and move on.

That's not how we think of it at all.

Yes I know what you think of it, but I've been in the alt-lifestyle scene for 17 years now. I've gotten to see the long term which you have not. I have some friends dipping their toes into poly currently, I can see the metaphorical train coming.

Well that's not happening to us

No one who watches Steven Universe is cool.

Dude that show is better than game of thrones, I fucking love cartoons Steven Universe kicks fuckin ass!

I gotta be honest, I've never watched it, I just got sick of the tumblr style fan art.

Well the tumblr art is awesome and the show is awesome so you're really missing out, I feel a little bad for you it really is an experience

Star is better though

Star?

Star vs the Forces of Evil. Pretty good show on disney. takes a lot of cues from Gravity Falls.

I only enjoy that show for the cuckqueaning memes

Oh huh, been meaning to check out gravity falls but so far Disney has me really unimpressed with their shows right now, lion guard especially could have been so cool if they'd just kept the continuity of the second movie and not dumbed the art style down so much, the hyenas suffered the most from that

that show is better than game of thrones

Nonetheless, his statement stands. I have spoken.

You would understand if you saw it! Seriously it's really really complex not just for a kids show but any show

Things can be complex and still be retarded agenda pushing faggotry

Agenda pushing lolwut hahaha

From the director: I want to teach kids about consent

rape scene engage

lol k

Uhhh there are no rape scenes in Steven Universe

Shit i dont even watch the show and i know more than you fam

They like fuse and shit as a form of sex and the white one lies to/manipulates the big black one about why they need to fuse

Lololol fusion is not sex. Jesus.

https://www.reddit.com/r/stevenuniverse/comments/3ag38g/seriously_though_fusion_isnt_sex/?st=j6182u4v&sh=e24c8e04

top comment

even the sub agrees with me

No they agree with me, it's not directly sex, in general it's not, garnet is not having sex with herself all the time, the "its inappropriate thing" I interpreted more as just a joke, the jasper and lapis thing was alluding to rape but for the most part it represented an abusive relationship. It's all subjective

No they agree with me, it's not directly sex, i

Wow, a shitty cartoon isn't always consistent with its themes. I'm shocked. But even so, this is coming from fans of the show, so even when biased against the show having faults, they pretty much say "yeah it's totally reasonable to consider it that" as well as the fact this is within the context of the director/creator literally claiming to be discussing the idea of "consent". And one of the characters literally jumping into the others crotch... like...

Here's a great overview for anyone interested

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j38aX4JxINQ

You're just a dick, literally every person I've met that doesn't like Steven Universe has turned out to be an asshole haha and I'm not kidding on that one I wish I was

Haha if you don't like the things i do, even if it's explaining rape to children to push an agenda about my worldview, then you're just an asshole haha

I'd like you to tell me how anything I've said is wrong though. I'm fine with being an asshole. I'd rather be that than the type of person that puts rape into kids tv shows

It's something kids should learn about in a way they can relate to in a metaphor that isn't graphic. But, I don't need to defend myself for you so I'm ending the conversation here

Little kids don't need to learn about rape. That's really fucked up dude.

But, I don't need to defend myself for you

It's "to you" ya doofus.

smh

To which? Teaching rape to children or not knowing a super common phrase?

Either way, yes, shameful

You obviously just don't get it

Yeah I don't really get why youd teach children about rape. Seems kind of fucked up to sneak shit in there like that.

Hahaha you just do not understand the show at all

I'm pretty clear on the self righteous sanctimony as the arbiters of sexual suggestion for children. Which is pretty fucked up and disgusting. But degeneracy always is.

Omg this is just getting funny

I'm glad you like exposing children to inappropriate topics, but you really shouldn't.

Whatevs dude but you seriously just don't like I'm ok im high now so this is funnier now and im just done lol

Whatevs dude but you seriously just don't like I'm ok im high now so this is funnier now and im just done lol

Was this really so stressful you needed to take drugs to deal with it? You might have a problem

Haha nah dude I just happened to start getting high during, it is a common occurrence when I'm commenting on reddit no matter where I am

That's pretty sad. You should see someone about that.

Like my psychiatrist who encourages it because it's better for you than clonazepam? Yup, already am!

Classic. Hope you can stop degeneracy as a crutch!

I HAVE SPOKEN.

And your words mean nothing to me

Cool by /r/drama standards.

Lowest bar set in the universe for "cool"

What did I ever do to you?

It used to be good to watch, still it pretty decent. Then it turned into a LBGT+ head-cannon party for the mentally ill. Now the average fan is a blue haired, drama riddled, gender of the month kind of person.

Why do those gender bending people like it so much?

Cause its got a rape scene but its okay cause reasons

Imagine actually believing the gems have a sex and that it's a sex positive show...

You obviously haven't watched it haha

I have watched every episode. I have yet to see any sex, genitalia, or even biology. They are all holograms coming out of rocks. I can forgive you for wanting to sexualize a children's cartoon, honest mistake.

You have nooo idea what kind of person Rebecca sugar is hahaha

Total dumb cunt and sjw, also hideous? Nah, I know. I love the show, hate her personality.

Yeah ok your opinion is meaningless

Prove otherwise

No

moo moo moo

You never cease to amaze us

Uhh okay lmao

This is an impressively comment, even by r/Drama standards. You never cease to amaze us.

This is an comment, even by r/Drama standards. You never cease to amze us.

this is. you never cease

this. cease

this but unceasingly

I had a seizure reading this thread

Why don't you tell us whose alt account this is, then we'll talk. 19 hours old? Really?

If someone gets pinged here, gives us shit in at least a somewhat witty way, and doesn't take us seriously, they'll be embraced by the community.

I'm afraid you now have several gentleman suitors with varying degrees of autism...but mostly severe.

Please remove me as an approved submitter.

Yeah I know.

where the videos at

Unfortunately, gone with the downfall of eroshare and I haven't started re-uploading yet

:'(

I know, 30+ vids gone, maybe only 10 of em still saved on my computer because video files are so huge

user reports:
1: i think i'm in love with this girl. what do?

idk watermelon u wanna take a drama commenter's virginity?

If you give me remote access to your computer I can help you store them on a dropbox

Really.

I just want to help is all

With what? Lmfao

With your file storage silly

Riiiight yeah no you're not hahaha

No it's okay. I'm a friend of your parents.

Get a room ffs

This is just stupid I am laughing so hard

;)

I seriously don't even know why but you're just making me laugh out loud over here!

:0

Alright I'm ending the train here this is getting silly

;)

user reports:
1: i think i'm in love with this girl. what do?

Keep yourself safe.

Oh I get that all the time, I'm used to it.

Maybe you should keep yourself safe, too.

Safe from what? Lol

Old age, mostly.

Uhhh alrighty, can do.

Its 2017, 1TB drives are like 40 bucks or something, common now.

40 bucks may as well be 400 for someone living on the poverty line.

If I were shameless and female, of which I am only one of those things, and if I were in need of money, I'd look into the cam sites. I had a friend who, made er well over the poverty line with that.

I already did that for a while, there's no need to now I'm moving to England in two months

Bring a Burka.

Excuse me?

U MAKE ME HAVE SEX

Um alright. Good for you.

user reports:
1: please ban this person for making moves on my girl

And interrupt a cripple fight? Please.

The mentally ill aren't cripples

fucking reee

They are in /r/drama.

Dude i said reee

that means i win

embraced by the community

This is not a fucking "community" faggot

It is and has been for a while, thanks to efforts by sardine mods.

Make peace with God being dead.

Don't think too much on it. This sub is filled with idiots.

(Yes, that includes me)

Oh I know, been here many times before.

We're losing Jewdank so we're flailing around for a replacement. But honestly you'll never quite live up to her legacy of narcissism, trashiness and just straight up insanity.

Well duh I am nothing like jewdank lol

Get a shitty tattoo on your arse and maybe we can make do.

I don't get shitty tattoos, I pay top dollar for mine that's why I only have one so far

God, it's like you've had your sense of humour surgically removed.

No I have one, you're just not funny at all

There there.

Is she the one that posted on the Gorrilaz Sub and got Shat on?

Yep that's me! No shame. That's how I always keep ending up here

Your acceptance of all this is interesting. You seem like a chill person.

You Annoy me, can we please ban this thing from /Drama.

Ha ha

Shame is for losers and fat people. So losers.

Okay?

Sure?

nigga looks like a lego

I'd really appreciate it if you not use the N word, please, if you could just edit your comment.

Okay, okay haha I'll admit that was definitely a dumb thing to type out instead of just keep in my head, you guys can say whatever the fuck you want, racial slurs just make me squirm sometimes. But yes that I deserve to be made fun of for lol

Ok Nigger Kike.

Y'know what that's actually funny because my dad did some digging in our ancestry after my grandma died and apparently I've got black as well as Jewish origins so he started saying "Oyvey, nigga!" (Cannot spell whatever the fuck that first word even means lol)

I deleted my comment because you said that. I hate you now.

Lololol omfg that's hilarious

Please will you be my girlfriend? I have a hard time talking to females IRL and you seem like such a cool girl. Don't mind the neckbeards on here. They are just jelous because they're buttholes aren't nearly as perfect as yours.

I am a virgin, but I would worship your ass like you wouldn't believe. Plz tell me how you want to be licked bcuz I would be there for u babe in every single way. U kno it babe. I'm tellin u. Trust me on this one my babe. I would seriously eat your shit if it meant I could run my fingers yhrough your hair just one time. Omg you are so hot and cute and funny and a good rapper and witty and u kno how to take a joke and u are just great.

Don't mind the haters, cuz they have no life. unlike me. You are my life. I watch all ur post and u are the one reason whu I haven't killed myself. I love you and I want to beclose to you and I love you and you are so pretty and jsut aaahh. <33

I'M DYING!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOL

Omg it's the goddess responding im so thankful. I love you and i think about u all the time and u respond to me(!) My heart is bursting of joy this is my best day of the year and probably ebver. I'm so nervous and happy lol

I don't only care about ur butthole and your girl pussy I promise I love ur coo, style and ur charisma and everythhing. I wish I culd kiss ur neck and ur throat an ur fingers and emty the trash can for u. not just have sex omg. IM NOT LIKE THOS OTHER GUYS I PROMISE THIS TO YOU

Rememeer that other time we talked in this sub. I said u looked like a version of me like 5 yers younger and i said my fetish was to hav sex wit you cuz you looked like me. and u responedd that u thought the idea was cool but I did't respond cuz i was scared an nervous and stuff omg. so sorry for that cuz i felt we had a connection and stuff :((

Srs i will do anything for u u are the one thing in my life right now.

Wait what really you were that dude??? No way link to the thread! Lmao

Oh, you remember. Tried to find it, but I don't even know what to search for. It was really freaky though and I know it got linked back here. What the fuck is wrong with you even answering such a request? If I remember correctly you were vaguely interested in that """kink""" Tsk tsk tsk. That's how you get raped gurl.

I was serious about the lookalike part btw. It is kinda spooky looking at you. You've got the exact same eyes, eyebrows and chin as me ~5 years or more back. I was emo when I was a teen too and I had a similar short haircut. Freaks me out. Especially when you show tits, broad hips and pussy. Hard to describe, but it's exactly how I imagine I'd look if I was a woman.

I'm not saying your ugly, we're both very attractive obviously ;)))) But you know... It's like watching yourself masturbate in a mirror. Freaky as fuck.

Haha I've responded to way worse things trust me. I'm a fucking pervert I love helping other perverts get off obviously I wouldn't be here if I didn't love that lol my subreddit is full of a wide range of weird fetishes so I told myself I'm no longer allowed to judge anyone for anything :P

Do you have any clothes for men laying around? You should do some pics fully clothed, with a baggy hoodie and jeans. Try to jut out your jaw as much as you can and only make masculine faces.

That would get me off m8

Sorry I don't take requests from shitstains

What I'm a shitstain now? You're the one bright spot in my otherwise dismal life :(

I'm the one? Lololol

You're The One For Me

Not available in my country. I am so glad.

If you weren't my twin-sister waifu I'd legit threaten to murder you over such a comment.

Hahahaha this is hilarious

Post Bussy to prove your worth

Stop discouraging the lolcows

(((Black)))

Is ni🅱️🅱️a better?

Is dis nigga serious

Hahaha omg that was one of my favorites

Wow I forgot about that train wreck of a video.

Is that a guy?

How'd you even hear of this. Obviously aside from being subscribed to the sub, but you make it sound like it was Reddit news haha

fuck, that was so painful. I couldn't get past a minute

I feel like u/homemadecouple is making a strong case for a replacement too

She looks like the product of an entire trailer park jerking off into a turkey baster.

Wow, her face is terrible. No wonder most of her shots don't show it.

So she considers whoring herself out to be a hobby (Whoreby, lmao)? To each their own, i guess.

Anyway, i get the impression that she found some dude to settle down with and she doesn't want him to break up with her before she can divorce for his shekels, so she'll have to keep this dark part of her life secret for now.

If smoking a cigar can be a hobby, anything can.

I bet she "smokes" "cigars"

I bet she sucks big fucking dick.

I know she does, because i saw a vid of her choking on one

Send me that shit stat nibba

I didn't save it, someone posted it here. Maybe someone will repost it ITT now.

Just found it on the hub, very easy to find if you're feeling nostalgic

But also that dick is not even that big so wtf

Search spankbang.com for jewdank, you can't miss is.

It is kinda shitty TBH.

Very very shitty

I needed porn to help me after watching it to end. Two dicks down.

Not sure if this is a euphemism going strait over my head.

But cigars can definitely be a hobby to enjoy

I guess a more general point is that if consuming an item can be considered a hobby then so can creating one, even if that item is S E X

Anything can be a hobby. My hobby is shitting on my neighbor's front porch and blaming it on the kids next door.

As a cigar smoker, it's amazing to see the sense of unironic community that goes on in a cigar shop. Probably one of the most non-forced diverse places you'll find.

Exhibitionism can definitely be a hobby - and turning a hobby into a side hustle is pretty common.

Source: me and an ex used to post on reddit and ran a fairly popular couple photography/advice tumblr (~44k followers). It was definitely a hobby for us. But we never monetized anything because it seemed like it would make everything weird and suck the fun out of it. And we also weren't drama magnets.

Still, I very much remember the feeling when you just get totally sick of it all.

So you murdered her

It's usually easier to just stop posting...

Why yall break up

Normal person stuff, absolutely nothing to do with our blog, etc. Nothing dramatic, we are still on good terms.

You're meant to doxx her fuckhead.

Amateur hour apparently.

Lmao I wouldn't do that even if she cheated on me and I hated her guts. Some things are sacred.

No dude is wifing that horrible ass tattoo. It's the Mjolnar of deal breakers.

It's like a whore version of share cropping, right?

it's so sad to see how the misgonyists of rebbit can ruin anything good or pure like /u/McDewjank

I mean, I ruined yer nan m8, so not that big of a... stretch.

What is dead may never die, but rises again harder and stronger. And with a freshly bleached asshole that was written off as a business expense.

Bahhh

Did you know that the bathtub was first marketed in north america as a horse trough and dog scalder?

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Has anyone ever told you about the legend of Darth McJewdank the troubled?

So she's retiring early from her very prosperous career?

she's a marketing genius. i bet she's done more in the last week than you will for decades

Unless she pays off all of my student loans, buys a house, two cars, and raises two healthy kids, I doubt that.

what a white bread life. no wonder you're jealous of the great women who keep things weird and new.

You don't know me. And if she's supposed to weird and new, I'll stick with my own thing.

lmao insecure white boi spotted

ok

m8 Unless you are shaggin yer own nan, ya can't touch me.

Who even are you

m8, anyone can do that. Buttplug and photoshop iz the hards.

unless she does [unimpressive things all adults do] shes not as successful (read: mediocre) as me

Get a shitty ass cheek tattoo, and show the internet pics of me shoving things up ass. Got it.

would prolly be an improvement from raising kids and having sex w ur wife twice a year

That's some lab-grade projection. Am I speaking with the infamous jewdank army?

Hahahaha implying i have my life together enough to have a wife or kids

lol im only pretending to be a dumbass

??????????

Anal for money > paying off my degree and other stuff that defines a sucessful adult in 2017

Then why leave such a great career?

So she's gonna take up streaming?

/u/susanstranglehands got any advice?

Have lots of daddy issues and tits.

Finally, someone here that gets it.

She hit the wall.

You considered being the next Jewdank?

Maybe if I get diagnosed with histrionic personality disorder and gain 50 lbs.

Sounds hot. You should do it tbh, it's not like you've much else to live for.

I almost did it once actually

You're right. Butthole selfies it is.

Sad day, she's lost the passion for showing her butthole to strangers.

And photoshopping out her hideous tattoo

flying to dubai with a saudi prince who loves scat every other weekend is not a relationship

I have been unhappy as of late which impacts my life on here. In turn my life on here impacts my happiness,...

I desire to be this much of a loser one day.

Look in the mirror. You got there Mo.

Got 'em^Fag

How long til she comes back? I give it a day. Tops.

I'm heading to Chicago today

this is your big chance /u/riemann1413

she goes to lolla as a full grown woman

honestly this might be the most disgusting thing i've learned about her

^ mad nobody likes him enough to go to festivals w him

thank god. if someone in my social circle wanted to go watch children take E for the first time i'd prolly stop speaking to them

not taking the e urself

grow up and do a real drug, like heroin

heroin and dancing dont mix too well

That's not true, I've seen some heroin addicts do a great OD shuffle

when the naloxone hits

Bunch of products were hiding from the storm in the port-o-potties on Friday. She probably felt right at home.

riemann is a chicagoan? that explains a lot

Rumor has it so does noodles

Honestly, good on her.

Over under on he back before September 15th?

She'll crash back into reddit on September 11th.

whenever some shit goes sideways at the office, or a relationship hits a bump and im not happy about it: at least im not in an internet whore's fanclub. redditors always manage to cheer me up

Guys, I'm totally cereal right now.

/u/mcdewjank Real talk: You should honestly leave reddit, you can't show yer ass forever m8. Life has to go on unless you are staring in professional dick taking videos, but I don't see that happening beyond a bang bus episode. You are getting older, its starting to show, that is life. So go, be free! Go cause irl work drama and turn the water cooler toxic. I believe in you!

for the 8th time

Big Bird made less of a fuss when he left sesame Street. Get over yourself. There's no shortage of dimply asses on reddit.

Is it bc she got fat

Next account will be /u/ewdankjay.

Why the fuck do people care about this woman so much? She is barely 2 steps above "not fat" on the beautiful scale, and her shit is more stale than beef jerky from China.

Because hate-jerking is a thing.

Like hate-fucking, but for autists.

Nooo! Now where will I get my attention craving (literal) asshole fix?

Oh right, basically everywhere else on the entire internet.

user reports:
1: If I ask nicely, would u/phedre blow me?

What say you, /u/phedre?

You do this on every post now.

Eh, only the ones with a non-stupid report. TBH I thought this one was kinda funny.

/r/bestofreports

Not quite the same - the reporters expect things to get posted here, so they are scattered over a number of different comments. There is occasionally something worthy of that sub, though.

I believe her this time

we missed u LLAXIS

So /u/mcdewjank, does your boyfriend like looking at your terrible ass tattoo or is he gonna make you laser that shit off?

Just ping /u/misterjewdank

I wonder what /u/sheepdank has to say about all of this.

Bahhh

It's almost as though whoring yourself out on the internet was never going to make you the Fortune 500 company you thought it would.

I must admit I was a little sad when I found out her name isn't actually McJewDank. What a cool name she could have had.

uuughhhh i want to give her a dairy enema and watch her fart it out all over me