eric 'the bike lock bandit' clanton releases statement

93  2017-08-17 by 4chan_pol_ambassador

158 comments

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That's the second site he's opened for his statement. The first one had comments turned on and he was roasted to a crisp in them.

Link please?

https://www.indybay.org/newsitems/2017/08/16/18801580.php

The comments have been... sanitized. Since I last visited.

When I was interviewed at the police station detective Hong had the nerve to say to me, “the internet did the work for us.” My case threatens to set a new standard in which right wing extremists can select targets for repression and have police enthusiastically and forcefully pursue them.

for anyone who doesnt know who this upstanding guy is he was running around during protests and smashing peoples heads with a u-lock. he was always wearing costumes/masks but /pol/ combed through hours of footage from multiple sources and managed to track him down. and he is butthurt about it

username checks out

My case threatens to set a new standard in which left wing extremists can select targets for repression and have u-locks enthusiastically and forcefully strike them.

and some people want to cure autism

Wow 4chan has gone mainstream they have ambassadors now?

someone has to plunge their hands into the filth so you can keep yours clean

God's work son

You know it never ceases to amaze me that people think evidence gathered from the internet magically cant be used in court

Well probably because the internet can absolutely get it 100% wrong. We don't have all the resources a police department has. We just have autism.

Is he pretending it wasn't him?

Because it was pretty fucking obviously him.

he plead not guilty. but considering hes being charged with 4 felony assaults i think he kind of has to.

Yeah, I think he's figured that whether he pleas for a decade or is found guilty at trial for two his life is over either way, so might as well swing for the fences.

Even if he loses, prison sounds like his paradise: an all powerful government feeds, houses and clothes you all on the taxpayer's dime.

And all the BBC you could ever want! Or even if you don't want it!

Way to short, I didn't finish

Are you trying to tell me there are consequences for my actions?

THIS AGGRESSION WILL NOT STAND, MAN!

he plead not guilty. but considering hes being charged with 4 felony assaults i think he kind of has to.

I wonder if he's looking for a not-guilty verdict via jury nullification?

Four felony assaults with a shit ton of evidence against me, I'm not sure I'd want to gamble my life with a jury trial. Seems like seeking a plea deal would be the better course of action.

3 strikes lol

I don't think you can get all the strikes at once. That's how freeway Ricky Ross got out after going away for a life sentence.

He's saying "the videos are unverified! The cops and prosecution didn't investigate, they just read 4chan and somehow tricked a grand jury!"

Yup

My case threatens to set a new standard in which right wing extremists can select targets for repression and have police enthusiastically and forcefully pursue them.

Uhu. Law enforcement now loves the alt-right according to this guy lol.

Hes a antifa commie, is it any surprise he hates police and think that law and order is against him?

The stupid fuck literally used the word "comrade" is his fucking post. LOCK HIM UP!

Yeah, law enforcement is capitalist oppreshun

Obviously Milo called in favours on the judges, you know that guy who got sacked from his job, had to self publish and no one is buying the book he wrote, cause you know he obviously has lots of sway.

yeah even from his writing alone it's pretty obvious

'If I did it" the blog post.

If the u-lock hits you must acquit.

Ahh the OJ method.

haha you're going to jail.

He'll have to join the Aryan Brotherhood, there.

I want this to be a reality show.

i mean if we are being all jokes and shit, race wars would be a decent reality tv show. no real pls.

I have a feeling it's going to happen.

"The Aryan Brotherhood: At Least We Use Lube."

Why would you not use lube.

Pretty sure I am going to regret asking.

Bussy blood is cheaper :')

Gotta shank that butthole first.

I hope to god he ends up with a 14/88 tat right on his neck.

Apparently he already has anti-fascist ink on his arm, so that's gonna be a problem

The great thing about skin is that it's removable!

Especially in prison!

Hot kitchen oil does wonders for that sort of thing.

not for long!

Wasn't this guy a college professor?

Man he's going to have a good time in prison, aren't their a bunch of white supremacist groups where he's ending up.

Depends.

Either way, dude is going to be some Latino guys bitch pre-transfer.

Depends.

Yeah, he's gonna need those soon enough.

I bet he will be a black guys bitch in no time. He's got pretty eyes, and long hair.

I'm hoping he is preparing his bussy for tyrone

If he doesn't consent, then he is racist!

His bussy is how he's going to pay reparations

Bussy4Bubba

i'm sure he'll continue to vocally fight white supremacism inside of prison like he did outside! he won't even have to worry about the fascist cops getting in his way and protecting the fash!

When I was interviewed at the police station detective Hong had the nerve to say to me, “the internet did the work for us.”

Holy shit my sides are in orbit.

You would think a college professor would know how to use commas.

Oh well, he won't need grammar where he's going.

"professor"

Bitch doesn't even have a PhD.

"Get owned by gamergate, bitch," he added.

Then the officer yelled free Bussy and told me to Keep Myself Safe

I dunno Brianna Wu said something similar when the FBI found nothing wrong and couldn't act on her accusations, she said they just took the internets word and didn't look into...maybe theres something to it....like them both being nut jobs.

He can talk ethics about pending bussy.

He actually was a prof on ethics, lel

That is the joke

oh

Supportericclanton.com lol no

Nothing like quite like using a fresh corpse to bring support to your cause.

Right? The fucking cowardice and opportunism of this Guy

Yeah, even I think that's shitty and I'm using the recent death of my father to avoid going to work.

I'm sure that's what your father would've wanted tho.

Like 5 paragraphs of himself. A few short sentences of Heather. This prick couldn't be more transparent.

Let’s stay focused on what matters here: some fascist pig cop has his zines, mannnnn

However, five weeks later the Berkeley police smashed into two houses, held guns to peoples’ heads, handcuffed, verbally abused, and stole the belongings of over a dozen people including books and zines.

Not your zines! Those fucking monsters!

-Were they poorly xeroxed?

-And how!

Suprised zines are still a thing, thought the internet would have killed them off.

that's like, a perfect comedic sentence, in that you're kind of with him until the last word ruins it all

He really, desperately needs you to know he reads zines. Remember zines? Remember? If you don't remember, you probably never heard of them- it's an underground thing. Remember Husker Du?

Yeah, we can publish a 'zine. My dad's office has a professional grade copier and he, like, owns the building.

Likely the entirety of their belongings.

And their antifa flag

It was a bedsheet they painted.

he deserves life for using the word zines unironically.

This is your brain on leftism.

When I was interviewed at the police station detective Hong had the nerve to say to me, “the internet did the work for us.”

Holy shit

Detective Hong tho...

Them Asians always being honky's bitch.

Even the Asians see through Clanton's bullshit.

What choo mean "even the Asians"?

Literally the first tankie Asian I ever saw is that fugly little Vietnamese bit who got arrested for vandalizing that statue recently.

Detective Hong is a P.I.M.P.

The people accusing me are horrible so I couldn't have done it.

The people accusing me are horrible so I couldn't have done it.

Don't laugh. It worked for OJ.

It's really hard to add any joke to this statement.

Are we sure that site isn't satire?

How about the rest of the site?

Man, that dumb fuck should really shut the hell up. Remember his foray to /r/legaladvice "for a friend"?

Also it's civil disobedience - the whole point is it's illegal. Enjoy prison for the cause, fag.

Got a link?

His "friend" asked for legal advice of how fucked he was here.

Original post was remove, but you can see it here

Also out of the loop thread

The guy is hilariously dumb

i think the concern is the people could see the videos and pictures and where we were standing combined with the accusations, things could be interpreted the wrong way. So while he didn't do anything, the weight of Twitter and certain Voldemort type websites may convince people of things that didn't happen.

kek

/u/zahlman - with whom I have never interacted before:

Please go sodomize yourself with the nearest convenient chainsaw, gently if possible.

When I am forced to talk about idiots who move their lips when they read in the future, I won't ping you (despite your new spot at the top of that list), and I should hope that when the occasion presents when you have to talk about people who are better than you - do me the same courtesy and don't ping me either despite the obviousness of my position on that list as well.

Toodles.

This is such weak-ass flame bait.

I have faith that you can do better than this.

Look - there's very little to work with. The guy uses the word "kek" which means that he's a trump supporter. What can I do or say that is worse than that? It's like trying to make fun of a Browns fan. They're already a Browns fan - what more can you do? So with Trump supporters.

Sorry to disappoint.

What can I do or say that is worse than that?

You could be from California.

Dude. California is awesome. Mountains, coast, beaches you can swim in, good food, good wines, the PCH, Hollywood.. I get that that was intended to be some weak ass anti-liberal comment but...Jeez.

Ramblings indicate you are from California. So you are worse than that after all.

See you too can be a winner!

Well I'm not.

Well that's too bad I guess, back in /u/zahlman 's loser category then.

good food, good wines

Imagine unironically believing this

Ta mère enculé, mec

Fdp

Verpiss dich du arschloch. Ou si vous préférez en français, Me faut retourner à la pute qui m'a accouchée.

I have no desire to sleep with her. Sorry.

I really hope you believe that saying kek means you're a trump supporter, makes it just that more hilarious.

If you couldn't figure out that he's a trump supporter from context...I'm not sure what I can do to help you. Maybe some courses in formal logic?

Man I definitely do not want to go to whatever school gave you courses in formal logic if saying kek means you are a trump supporter. Is that from Shareblue university? Because there is no logic involved in making that connection.

Every time I think I might've underestimated the intelligence of the people who like Trump, it turns out I've missed my mark and overestimated by a wide margin. I guess i should blame myself. I try to be open minded, but I suppose open mindedness shouldn't include crediting people with the intelligence not to drown in the rain. I'm sorry I overestimated you.

No fucknuts, 'Kek' was simply the icing on the cake. The fact that that douchecanoe tried to call me out based on the bike lock thing confirmed it. The fact that you can't figure that's what I meant by saying "context" is what clues me in that you'd stare up at the pretty clouds and the swirly raindrops open mouthed with awe until you drowned.

Let me quote you directly.

The guy uses the word "kek" which means that he's a trump supporter.

I responded, it is hilarious if you unironically believe this. I didn't mention anything else the guy said. I responded to something you quite literally said. Nice moving goalposts.

I don't unironically believe it. But it's part of a package deal. To the extent that you're taking this seriously… That's your own fault. I just like screwing with alt-rightards when I happen to be in a popcorn sub. The fact that you can't handle the heat in your own kitchen reflects on you… not me.

I know I'm getting baited into serious posting right now, but chill out dude lmao. 99% of people in this subreddit aren't alt-right. I just don't freak out like you do and immediately accuse anybody who disagrees with you as alt-right. Like it's actually unhealthy. If you wanna talk about it, feel free to msg me.

I don't unironically believe [this guy that I'm trying to screw with belongs to a group]

I just like screwing with [people who belong to the group in question, which is why I'm trying to screw with this guy]

Do you actually know what the word "unironically" means?

I don't unironically believe [this guy that I'm trying to screw with belongs to a group]

I just like screwing with [people who belong to the group in question, which is why I'm trying to screw with this guy]

Do you actually know what the word "unironically" means?

I don't unironically believe [this guy that I'm trying to screw with belongs to a group]

I just like screwing with [people who belong to the group in question, which is why I'm trying to screw with this guy]

Do you actually know what the word "unironically" means?

The fact that that douchecanoe tried to call me out based on the bike lock thing confirmed it.

Because only a Trump supporter could possibly think that Antifa does bad things, despite all the video evidence of them doing bad things.

Sure thing, buddy.

If you aren't one then tell me I'm wrong.

If you aren't one then tell me I'm wrong.

I already did. You pretended not to notice.

pretty much only Trump supporters care about antifa

Wow, you actually believe this. You really can't think of a reason why other people would care about their documented actions? In this fantasy land of yours, the only real reason for not being okay with people getting hit over the head with bike locks by fucking university professors of ethics because of their political views, is sharing those political views?

Protip: I'm not even American.

Doesn't matter whether you're American or Canadian or from wherever the fact that you want to gargle some tangerine testicles is what makes you a Trump supporter. That you can't vote for him in three years does make me happy, however.

The guy uses the word "kek" which means that he's a trump supporter.

Isn't this some of that poor rationale you were criticizing in that BoLA thread?

No. Context is everything. Internet detectives are generally useless for things IRL, but for the purposes of a post in r/drama - I'm happy to do essentially no research and insult some neo-nazi apologist based on a tiny bit of research. Isn't that the point of this sub?

Or has this place turned into yet another r/conspiracy or r/wikileaks where it's just a bunch of T_D alts trying to pretend they aren't the mouth breathers they really are? The front page makes it seem that way, but I'm not a frequent visitor here, so I don't really care. It's a pity they have to leak out and infest the rest of this otherwise fine website but diseases have to spread so I don't know why T_D would be any different.

Yes, the point of this sub is to make fun of others, which is why I am poking a hypocritical little puppy such as yourself.

A lot of the Donald supporters get shut down here, or at least riled up enough to get a laugh. A lot of the supporters for the left too. We are equal opportunity piss takers.

Oh, those were meant to be pokes? Felt like feathers. Carry on. Was pleasant.

I use a feather touch to get you aroused. Foreplay has always been a staple of my sex life.

The guy uses the word "kek" which means that he's a trump supporter.

I mean, I'd post an image macro of Trump saying "Wrong.", but you'd just take that as further evidence.

Toodles.

I hate that word. I now declare you my enemy.

[knees shaking]

y u mad tho

Not really. But if I get called in to some right wing playground yeah… I'll shit in the sandbox. Most of my Reddit time is spent modding a serious sub, where I am actually extra nice to Trump voters. So when I have the chance to tweak their noses in their native environment… Yeah I'll take it.

Mostly I have pity for y'all. Some contempt. A tiny smidge of fear but mostly I just feel pity. It's unfortunate how far we've fallen as a country that people like you show your face isn't public instead of hiding them behind the hood. It makes me sad.

some right wing playground

lol. Because only right-wingers could possibly have a problem with literal anarchists and communists waving around Soviet and red-and-black flags on American streets while destroying property, committing violence, intimidating the locals and engaging in black bloc tactics.

No, I have a problem with them because they're making it difficult for left-wing progress to be made. You fuckers could and should have actual health care (not some insurance racket) by now if you were even as good at getting people to try things as new parents are at feeding new foods to their firstborn. You got Medicare set up in the fucking 60s, hot on the heels of all the other equality law you managed to pass, and then you let it all go to shit because you'd rather reeeeeeeeeeeee about cisheteronormatipatriarcapitalism or something instead of going "hey maybe instead of addressing the problem of uninsured poor people getting sick because they can't afford $150 for routine medical checkups by making them buy insurance they also can't afford, we could try making it a line item in the budget instead of this other useless shit we were thinking about".

Meanwhile I'm up here in Canada twiddling my thumbs and wondering when these idiots will realize that dental care is also important enough for the same treatment, and potentially prevents a ton of other more serious conditions down the road that sometimes literally kill people.

where I am actually extra nice to Trump voters

You genuinely think that doing your job as a moderator to keep a civil subreddit civil when OP is someone you disagree with, constitutes being "extra nice" to that OP. Impressive.

Thanks. I treated myself with an Oreo when I posted that.

(Can you guys seriously not tell I'm just fucking around? I thought that's what you're supposed to do here?)

(Taking you seriously is mandatory by the same rules.)

(Hmm. I read the sidebar it said I was supposed to create drama, so I did. I think I may have taken it too far.)

Wait who the fuck are you again? Haha oh right, I've got you tagged from 7 months ago - my only interaction with you, where you were claiming that the Trump admin was going to be great for trans-women, haha.

How's that worked out for you so far? Goodness I'm impressed that you're still salty 7 months later.

Lol I like the part where you link to my comment so everyone can see how it doesn't say what you're claiming it says.

And no, I've interacted you besides that, you just forgot.

BTW, you're still objectively wrong about FADA containing any provision about conversion therapy, and also this part

In Trump's first 100 days of office congress will draft some form of anti LGBT legislation which curtails specific rights and Trump will sign it into law without protest.

didn't happen AFAICT, unless you'd like to try to challenge that.

salty

Lol, how can I be salty when I'm #winning?

So tragically delusional.

So you'll be happy to point me at the wording in FADA that explicitly references conversion therapy, or the anti-LGBT legislation that was passed in Trump's first 100 days, then? You know, because it's so obvious that I'm delusional and that reality is not as I describe?

So you'll be happy to point me at the wording in FADA that explicitly references conversion therapy, or the anti-LGBT legislation that was passed in Trump's first 100 days, then? You know, because it's so obvious that I'm delusional and that reality is not as I describe?

So you'll be happy to point me at the wording in FADA that explicitly references conversion therapy, or the anti-LGBT legislation that was passed in Trump's first 100 days, then? You know, because it's so obvious that I'm delusional and that reality is not as I describe?

But he is an academic lecturer. Only proles and laborers are dumb.

Use a VPN guys or TOR or SOMETHING, they caught me. Btw I'm about to leave the country so they can't arrest me.

hahahahahahahahaha.

It's one thing to deny you used a bike lock to attack someone, but to drag that poor woman killed in Charlottesville and Mumia into his shitpost?

This fuckin guy

He'll be fucked plenty in the bussy.

Mind if I serious post a bit here...

and stole the belongings of over a dozen people including books and zines.

If I was trying to gather support I'd probably dispense with trying to be a hipster and just write "magazines". More than that, police collecting books and magazines as evidence isn't exactly new ground to cover.

detective Hong had the nerve to say to me, “the internet did the work for us.”

You used a bike lock to assault someone that was protected by an army armed with military grade autism. That's on you dude. Detective Hong is just along for the ride.

Heather Heyer gave her life trying to stop the growth of this hate.

Don't try to invoke your comrade that got killed specifically in an escalation of actions that you were part of. The Alt-Right didn't start showing up in full LARP gear until you Antifa turds had started assaulting people who were peacefully demonstrating. You've played your part in the escalation, congratulations.

Special thanks to the Bay Area Anti Repression Committee and the Labor Action Committee to Free Mumia Abu-Jamal for helping build support

That's a great way to get your word out. Use a group that is actively trying to free a cop killer...

Seriously fuck him, he is one of the big reasons violence escalted in the first place. He's partly to blame for the death.

haha i love how hes just throwing all the buzzwords out there

also

When I was interviewed at the police station detective Hong had the nerve to say to me, “the internet did the work for us.”

hahahahhahahaha

Good job on the political street violence, Eric. You are an hero.

Bay Area Anti Repression Committee

lol

Lmao they found the nask and weapon, with blood on it in his house

His bussy better be ready

They did? Holy shit, I need the source on that, its fucking hilarious how anyone can think he is innocent.

An “Iron Front” tattoo on his bicep, photographed while he was being logged into jail, “is associated with Anti-Fascists,” too, according to court papers.

lol

Outside the courtroom before the arraignment, Siegel became involved in a heated back-and-forth argument about free speech and the alleged violence from Clanton with about 10 right wingers. One had a Make America Great hat on, another carried the so-called Kekistan flag. A few of the protesters started a chant of “lock him up, lock him up.”

lol

2-4 years per felony

lol

Court papers reveal, however, that Clanton struck at least seven people in the head

lol

No lock is gonna keep Bubba from his sweet honkey booty

Is this the best Trumpers have to wave away the Charolettesville Charger of Nonviolence?