They aren't wrong, all of you are worthless.

/u/xNotch exists ya know

Hmm, but why would /u/masterlawlz devalue himself like that?

I know he can be pretty self-deprecating at times, but even for him this would be low.

Hey I didn't know you came back lol

Only occasionally to insult people or to sexually harass /u/riemann1413

give it to me daddy

http://i.imgur.com/XKrXjQt.gif

Daddy, is it twu dat /u/_lilpoundcake was booted from dwama because of her gussy?

lpc left on her own accord. dont ask for the details, that's all i know.

dont ask for the details

What are the details?

You're not shit next to me. My genes are just light years superior to yours and I don't even need to look at you.

Snapshots:

1. This Post - archive.org, megalodon.jp*, archive.is

^{I am a bot. (Info / Contact)}

Amazing that snappy pulled a quote from Dave Cgapelle so quickly

Good bot

My asshole itches.

wish there were sources for these quotes

They are all the same source. Navy SEALs. Tendies. Attack helicopter. Balls-deep in Amy Schumer. All from a black-budget AI project called /pol/

I see Amy Schumer as a challenge, more than anything. Here is a woman who, in every single aspect, is absolutely revolting - her exterior AND her personality - yet I can't help but wonder what would be like, to plunge balls-deep into her repeatedly. That's right. Balls-deep. With no protection. I won't lie, I'm extraordinarily-hard while typing this. I want to grab this... thing... and that's what Amy Schumer is, let's not delude ourselves, a "thing"... by the hips and ram mercilessly in and out of her quivering, malformed cunt with the force of a gladiatorial chariot, while she makes stupid faces and contorts orgasmically, unable to control her bodily reactions even if she wanted to. I would erupt violently inside that corrupt and corrupting womb as though the entire fate of humanity depended on my seed penetrating the foul walls of one of her ovaries, the electrical fusion from this coupling creating the Antichrist, as our combined, guttural, Chewbacca-like roars shattered glass and walls alike around us, the house toppling down while we lay there in a filthy, disgusting mess. Yeah. I reckon Amy Schumer does it for me.

That tub of lard is all yours buddy. Careful though her axe wound smells like barn animals.

Gross

Ovum.. sperm dont penetrate ovaries. Well maybe yours could

Now that's a good joke.......wait, is she serious?

Maybe one day. But she needs to take a break go live a normal life for a couple months. Find her roots again.

Find her roots again.

Shouldn't be hard to find, we can all see them and it's pretty clear she's not a blonde.

Malcolm X died for this.

She's be right if Netflix paid by the pound.

Fuck, I made that joke to Kevin Smith a few years ago when he was giving a speech and I noticed his tickets were 3 times more expensive than the other shows at the con.

who?

Director of Jay and Silent Bob movies, made hot garbage since then.

Never heard of them

They were the two guys in Dogma if you've seen that.

Is that a movie?

Yeah they made this old meme

Never seen it

He was in Die Hard 4. Fat nerd guy. Don't pretend you haven't seen a Die Hard movie; just don't.

Are they Rated R?

No, you're thinking of this

If she's still going someone must find her entertaining. Who's watching her?

I'm willing to bet her special was really popular, it had her fans watching it and like 10x that many hate-watching it.

Even if that's the case it got nowhere near the numbers Dave Chapelle's specials did and they had to kill their five-star rating system because of it.

it obviously fucking sucks but i wouldn't doubt that it's one of their better viewed comedy specials is all. i watched it all before smashing that 1 star thumbs down.

I never rate things on Netflix if I don't like them. If my opinion is that it deserves less than three stars I just exit it. My wife gave that special a 1 star because I wouldn't. It was awful.

If she's still going someone must find her entertaining.

That's not how the entertainment business works. I realized it a few years ago when the woman I was dating at the time started watching Will and Grace. The lead actress on that show had spent the previous few years in a series of failed television shows (go look at her IMDB). Most people with a string of failures like that would have a hard time getting work, but she kept getting cast.

An even better example: Lena Dunham. No one likes her as a person or an artist yet she gets all sorts of press. It's all about connections.

Some "celebrities" aren't in any way popular or beloved, but they're presented that way by the media. Amy Schumer is definitely one of these celebrities. If you tell enough people that someone is famous and talented at least some of the more retarded people are going to believe you. If not for the media coverage and special support from the industry she gets because her uncle is a senator (Charles Schumer of NY is her uncle) you'd never hear another word about her.

No one likes her as a person or an artist

i heard people liked a movie she made or something

i heard people liked a movie she made or something

That's exactly my point. Where did you hear that? Probably from some entertainment blog/show/magazine. After the idea gets spread around media a bit you'll have some idiots start agreeing with it so they can sound like they know what's up. It's not a natural process. These people aren't where they are because of their own talent. People like that don't need to be propped up. They get where they're going and stay there based on their own merit/popularity. When the media makes your career they can break career. All the media needs to do is stop covering you or start writing articles about how terrible you are.

Everybody who likes something I don't like are sheep.

How can you miss the point so hard.

Tell me who your favorite artist is (in any medium) and I'll reply back with a wall of text about how they're being "propped" up by extensive media coverage, favorable reviews, and adoring fans.

William Shakespear, literature.

have fun bro

That's exactly my point. Where did you hear that? Probably from some English teacher or literary magazine. After the idea gets spread around literary circles a bit you'll have some bardolatrists start agreeing with it so they can sound like they know what's up. It's not a natural process. Shakspeare isn't where he is because of his own talent. Playwrghts with talent don't need to be propped up. They get where they're going and stay there based on their own merit/popularity. When literary critics make your career they can break career. All the media needs to do is stop covering you or start writing articles about how terrible you are.

lol

i give you props for trying

I agree it's a weak argument. Which is my point.

Artist I don't like is enjoying success? They're propped up by favorable media coverage.

Artist I like is enjoying success? They earned it through merit.

Prove me wrong.

I didn't give you permission to reply to me. Listen, it was entertaining, first. Hell, it was actually funny. But now I'm getting the feeling that you actually think that you're on my level. From the day I was born, I was destined for success, you little shit. I was brought into this world by a software engineer and and a prominent actuary, both of Norwegian descent. From the moment that the fucking curtains were raised, I was set to dominate the STEM fields. And because I had guardians that actually cared about me, I flourished. Pretty soon, I was placed into a special school of correspondence, specifically I.M Gelfand's school for gifted children in New England. I not only reached my parents' expectations, but I passed them with flying colors. I had raw talent. I was fucking better. I was surrounded by 6th graders, many from Hong Kong, whom were smarter than half the posters in this fucking thread. And now, where am I? In MIT, getting my double BS in Electrical Engineering and Physics, with a Stanford-Binet tested IQ of 147 at age 17. Get this through your head: you are nothing. I am worth more than your entire goddamn family. I'm smarter than you, better looking than you, taller than you, wealthier than you, and more employable than you. While you type out another post to get cheap laughs, I'll be simultaneously working with the brightest minds in the world and fornicating with my beautiful girlfriend. It gets on my nerves when people pretend to be better than me. Know your place, you fucking vermin. Never, ever reply to my posts, again.

You're fucking dead, kiddo.

No grunge is right, Trainwreck had it's funny moments, John Cena.

It's like that lady who ruined Ghostbusters still made a funny movie called Spy.

Aul Feig is a woman now?

When was he ever a man?

Spy sucks

You are entitled to your wrong opinion, Jason Statham alone was worth watching the movie for.

Sometimes a man needs to go to sea

Adam Sandler still sells tickets. There's an audience of people who will consume any trash made available to them.

Adam Sandler still sells tickets. There's an audience of people who will consume any trash made available to them.

Yeah, Adam Sandler still sells tickets...despite the fact that 90%+ of the media about him now is how terrible his movies are. To hear it on the news, in print, or on Reddit/Facebook/Twitter, Adam Sandler is the Nickleback of comedic actors, but people still watch his stuff. Why? Because Adam Sandler's career isn't built solely on puff pieces about how he's the voice of his generation (Dunham), nor was his career launched from relative obscurity to prominence with excessive, undeserved hype (Schumer). Adam Sandler built his audience on the basis of his own work and talent, regardless of what your opinion of his work, talent, or lack thereof. Adam Sandler's audience isn't there because someone told them he is the next big thing, they're there because they like Adam Sandler.

Hi Adam, I liked you in Happy Gilmore but Jack & Jill made me want to wear blackface and shout at a cop.

(((Debra Lynn Messing))) (born August 15, 1968) is an American actress. She is known for her many television roles, most notably her eight-year run playing Grace Adler on the NBC sitcom Will & Grace.

Following her graduation from New York University's Tisch School of the Arts, Messing had short lived tenures on the Fox sitcom Ned & Stacey (1995–1997) and the ABC sci-fi Prey (1998). She rose to prominence in her role as interior designer Grace Adler on Will & Grace (1998–2006), earning both commercial and critical success throughout the series' run.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Debra_Messing

Debra Messing

Debra Lynn Messing (born August 15, 1968) is an American actress. She is known for her many television roles, most notably her eight-year run playing Grace Adler on the NBC sitcom Will & Grace.

Following her graduation from New York University's Tisch School of the Arts, Messing had short lived tenures on the Fox sitcom Ned & Stacey (1995–1997) and the ABC sci-fi Prey (1998). She rose to prominence in her role as interior designer Grace Adler on Will & Grace (1998–2006), earning both commercial and critical success throughout the series' run.

^{[ PM | Exclude me | Exclude from subreddit | FAQ / Information | Source ] Downvote to remove | v0.26}

my parents love Lena Dunhams show Girls. There's def an audience out there

I watched Girls because of Kylo Ren. It is a terrible show, and Kylo is a fart in it. A giant fart.

https://www.reddit.com/r/bestof/comments/6vo0vo/jubbergun_explains_why_amy_schumer_is_still_around/?sort=confidence

Bitch, you high. That's barely an adequate /r/Drama post. You'd have to be a special form of stupid to post it to /r/brigadesbestof.

Drama: any incident, scene, gaffe, rumor, opinion, or disagreement that is blown entirely out of proportion.

Do your part to keep our community healthy by blowing everything out of proportion and making literally everything as dramatic as possible.

Fair enough.

That's not how the entertainment business works.

But that's exactly how it works. Basically every single actor you know and love has starred in absolute shit before they made it big.

I rented Snatched

I stand en retched

Stupid drunk chicks who like "I was so wasted" and "my vagina" jokes.

Hell, I am willing to bet me or anyone else here is worth more to Netflix than she is.

Is there a racial wage gap? If so has she factored that into her equation?

Everyone is giving her shit for asking which makes it all the funnier when I read now that Netflix paid up.

Basically political extortion. Her uncle is a big-shot in the Democratic party. Either they pay up, or he has his buddies hold up the shit they want done.

Too, also, a million clickbait articles calling Netflix a bunch of sexist white supremacist misogynistic rape apologists.

Fuck this lard ass smh

The CEO of Mylan, the company who is responsible for the Epi-Pen and its outrageous price increases, is daughter to a US senator or something. So basically same shit, different racket.

wow, i guess she can be funny after all

Maybe she realizes she is going the way of Dane Cook and in a year she won't be relevant.

Even he managed to get a couple fat Disney checks.

You do not understand how Hollywood works. She will continue to star opposite of other female stars and be in at least one shitty comedy every single year until 2022 where she tries her hand at a serious role, a true "Oscar vehicle".

It will probably be a biopic of two "alcoholics", Tina and Amy, struggling to get their lives back on track after abusive relationships.

The critics will tell us all how amazing and deep the performance and when we watch it we'll be collectively scratching our heads with a few wtf's slipping out, "I mean it was decent I guess, but Oscar??" we'll then rush to the internet to post our confused thoughts and before typing a word be greeted by an unending precluding accusations of misogyny.

I am sure there is a planet out there when Shumer is as worthy and talented as Chappelle, but it sure as shit isn't Earth.

fucking lol shes not though is she

Well shed gonna need more tjan they made to pay for all those jokes she stole!

lol no you're not

lol

I see Amy Schumer as a challenge, more than anything. Here is a woman who, in every single aspect, is absolutely revolting - her exterior AND her personality - yet I can't help but wonder what would be like, to plunge balls-deep into her repeatedly. That's right. Balls-deep. With no protection.

I won't lie, I'm extraordinarily-hard while typing this. I want to grab this... thing... and that's what Amy Schumer is, let's not delude ourselves, a "thing"... by the hips and ram mercilessly in and out of her quivering, malformed cunt with the force of a gladiatorial chariot, while she makes stupid faces and contorts orgasmically, unable to control her bodily reactions even if she wanted to.

I would erupt violently inside that corrupt and corrupting womb as though the entire fate of humanity depended on my seed penetrating the foul walls of one of her ovaries, the electrical fusion from this coupling creating the Antichrist, as our combined, guttural, Chewbacca-like roars shattered glass and walls alike around us, the house toppling down while we lay there in a filthy, disgusting mess.

Yeah. I reckon Amy Schumer does it for me.

I mean, if sold as pet food, sure. There is more of her.

Women are funny. Get over it.

REEEEEEEEEEEEE

deal with it white male :)

In the 50's women were "in the kitchen" because men made enough money to care for his family! Oh and Men cared for their families, Men were proud to be men! Kids were raised at home, and not in daycare!, People were proud of what they had because they earned it! They were proud of their country, their families and their accomplishments! The economy tanked and people this it's ok! It's getting better but won't be back to great until we get back to the free market. https://mises.org/library/american-economy-not-free-market-economy

There is so much information that you could read about how America use to be, if you wanted to, but then you would have to care a little but about this country and I just don't see that happening. Have a wonderful day and MAGA!!!!

is that the face of autism ?

Yes. Copy pasta courtesy of u/MotherforTrump

mother of god

They have believed the lies that the MSM have been putting out for so long that they can't handle any kind of reality because they are terrified by what they have been told! They have lost all ability to form their own opinion or have a thought of their own! They can only feel what someone else tells them to feel and think what they are told to think! We will break most of them and they will start waking up. But there are going to always be some that just need to be put down because there is no hope for them! But this is why it so important to make sure our kids have to ability to call bull shit when they see it and they can form thoughts of their own, they also need to know how to be problem solvers and only using violence for self defense if they need to!

dat irony tho

Some women are funny, this is not one of them, this is just a joke stealing hack.

ahah cry more manbaby :)

Time to go beat my wife.

Oh bb no wat s u doin'

Netflix's response

actually they gave her more money

That was probably first good and original joke I've heard from her...

What a shithead

For whatever reason, women love and idolize this broad. She has the whole feminist movement behind her.

Oh, Christ, not all of us. Not even most of us.

BodyPos

no ur not lmao

I didn't know there was a pay gap between white women and black men. Will this hurt the narrative?

The core problem here is that Netflix has ordered way too much garbage and now its showing

Please more shows like Ozark

Please more shows like Ozark

I second this motion. That show is wild.