You're not shit next to me. My genes are just light years superior to yours and I don't even need to look at you.

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I thought women couldn't have depression?

/u/two__sheds just admit that you're kinda a failure at everything, including ending your life. If you were serious about it, you wouldn't try and OD on No-Doze

Mmm, nice try.

"I took 20 aspirin! I'm really serious!!" Isn't a great look, sweetie

I'll take "I'm bad at suicide" over "I'm trolling a person about their past suicide attempts!" any day, hon.

you realize that a Remington and a field would do the trick right? It's pretty clear you were never serious about following through. Why do you want the attention? Even after the fact it's just "oh woe is me"

Ooh, right, I forgot that I'm never supposed to contribute my own relevant experiences to a discussion. Duh.

I'm not sad about my past attempts. Puking up those pills is the best thing that ever happened to me. What I'm sad about is the fact that not everyone who hits that kind of low has a second chance. You know, like the men dying unnecessarily from suicide at greater rates than women.

I'm sad

Here's a picture/gif of a cat, hopefully it'll cheer you up :).

I am a bot. use !unsubscribetosadcat for me to ignore you.

Good bot!

You made yourself throw up because you wanted out? Again: it's clear you were never serious

You poor thing.

Sleeping pills don't work too. That shit will end you up in a hospital under comma and maybe even sever neurological damage. Don't half ass it because you'll make your life even worse.

^THIS PSA IS FOR ALL OF YOU!

Also my PMs are open for anyone who just wants to talk! <3

under comma

Don't you hate it when you become a punctuation?

Goddamnit 😂

Rofl how does aspirin taste on the way back up?

I would imagine bitter? It's an acid.

I just figured out where I am. I was trying to figure out when TiA became such a cesspit. Makes sense now!

You guys enjoy, I've got to get going.

user reports:

1: BASES ARE BITTER, ACIDS ARE SOUR YOU FUCKING IDIOT

they right

Hahaha, got me there.

I mean, you're obviously not serious if you're using pills. That's why I have big ass tablets of sodium cyanide in my garage

Lmao, taking Tylenol isn't even a suicide attempt, it's just being a massive faggot

Take a look, see where I said I took Tylenol ;)

So what'd you take? Advil?

No, birth control, of course! Because I wasn't serious!

Fucking numpty XD

I mean, if you were serious, there's super simple and effective ways tbh.

I'm sorry that I didn't meet your exacting standards for suicide attempts?

You guys are a whole other breed.

"I've tried nothing and I'm all out of ideas"

You're bad troll that's all. They're just trying to milk you. Lmao

I'm well aware. If I wanted to bait them, I'd give them more to work with. I'm waiting for someone to pick me up, so I don't have anything better to do.

You guys snorting some blood pressure meds?

We're going to cut ourselves with plastic knives, actually.

No, I'm picking up my car from the dealership. Sorry to disappoint.

See, my prefered method would be using a car. Funnel that exhaust into the cabin and go to sleep.

Super easy, super effective

I'll pick you up. Ok tell me why garlic bread isn't better that buttered toast and why those who don't think that why shouldn't be sent to a gulag?

Don't worry, there's always next time to get it right.

*sweaty

But really, if you want to go out, you have to do something suitably dramatic. Snort some crushed glass or something, that'll show 'em.

I ended up going with the option nobody expected: sorting my shit out and becoming a happy, functional person. That really showed them.

>happy

>functional

And yet here you are, defending what passes for your honor on r/drama.

I don't have anything better to do at the moment. You guys are the ones who keep talking to me.

at the moment

Yeah, I bet you don't, sweetheart. This or any other.

Remember, suicide is a perfectly good method for solving your problems. It's okay, just open the helium valve and let your troubles float away.

Can I kill myself with mashed potatoes and gravy?

Mmmm GRAVY!!!

I ended up going with the option nobody expected: sorting my shit out and becoming a happy, functional person. That really showed them.

Tbh, you should have tried to kill yourself with PEZ candy. Or maybe too many pretzels. Probably would have been more effective than taking more than the recommended dose of ibuprofen

Not sure where the ibuprofen idea came from, but you guys really like that theory.

So what was it? Aleve, Nyquill? Some antibiotics you found in the medicine cabinet?

It was this little known pill called "noneofyourbusiness".

I find it kind of surreal that I've got multiple people asking me to prove that I really wanted to kill myself by detailing the method I used. Then again, I'm on the internet.

It was antibiotics, wasn't it? That's why you won't say.

No need to prove it since you obviously didn't lmao. Just like everything else in the world, you have to go to a real man if you want something done right

You realize what the sidebar says right?

I never said anything about her killing herself. I said she's a failure all around

u/xjapxn your post is bad and you should feel bad! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

IKR? Like I've never been told I should kill myself by some teenaged edgelord on Reddit before.

Edgelord? "Mis" Muh men aren't serious about suicide how about bait harder next time lol. You're attempt is pathetic and you should feel bad! Lol

And I'm not sure where that came from.

I think that men dying at higher rates is a horrible thing, and that it should be addressed. I don't think the solution is to educate women in the benefits of firearms as a divide method.

We need equality, tbh. So women need to bump those numbers up. Maybe the government should set up a quota? 🤔🤔🤔

Or you could cut out the middleman and just start executing women. You know, since they're not serious.

Now THERE is a solution. Pls send me your full name so I can write you in as my presidential nomination when Trump's 8 years are up.

Not eligible, unfortunately. Sorry 😔

I'll still do it, we need those kinds of ideas in governemtn

How come I'm not surprised?

In an industry filled with thirsty kissless old virgins, of course that group will feel threatened by the arrival of more women. More people who will be able to tell them they suck, that they are without remedy, that they are disgusting to normal people? I'd feel threatened. Then again, they should feel threatened, because they are the kind of people (these pasty-white, socially inept, inexperienced neckbeards) that shouldn't be hired to begin with! Not women, but them! Their toxic personalities, which got them where they are now, and their disgusting hygienic standards (not to say anything about their unattractive looks) is the stuff that drove people away from them in the first place.

As a woman in tech, I'm sick and tired of dealing with social outcasts in an everyday basis. None of my non-STEM friends deal with things like this. Every time I talk to them about having to work with people with zero social skills, that don't share any interest in normal social events, that have zero social experience, that get creepy, that are the epitome of the neckbeard, I'm treated as though as I did work in some sort of hospice for the mentally challenged. They get to work and collaborate with normal, well-adjusted coworkers, which makes their work more fulfilling, makes them want to improve and get involved, and even have repercussions in their social lifes. Me? It's like dealing with freshmen from high school. And I dread the possibility of encountering them outside work. Like, fear-for-my-life level of dread.

The real problem with IT? It's filled with socially inept white men. Get rid of them, and see the industry boom. You think the Knuths, the Dijkstras, the Hamiltons, the Shockleys, the Moores or the von Neumanns of the past were socially unadjusted? They were normal people. They managed to get along with normal people. Chat, keep a conversation, date, get laid, party, go out on weekends. It's impossible to work with people who are better described as "androids trying too hard to forget they are in part humans". It simply doesn't work like that. Maybe in the future, when AI manages to take over the software industry, such an entity can be useful. But this industry basically demands that any newcomer becomes maladjusted. That is bound to backfire.

And you are seeing the backfire already. China is gaining ground. So does Europe. Places where the neckbeard, socially inexperienced virgin stereotype of an IT worker doesn't really exist. I've worked there with amazing and talented people who also knew how to relate to people, how to collaborate, how to work in groups, how to socialize. They were creative. That's why you see a drop in quality in Silicon Valley: they are hiring robot-wannabe, academics-obsessed manchildren who have known (or worse: cannot know) any other life than coding/software/engineering. Of course they are going to stunt. There's nothing new. No new ideas, no new worldviews. The same always-repeated mantras, dogmas, rule-of-thumbs and "deities"/idols they worship.

Again, the solution? It's not "hire more women/black people". It's stop hiring socially stunted, inexperienced, kissless virgins. Then women and minorities will flock back to you and you'll get several new sets of fresh eyes.

We should always strive to offer better guidance to people on how to achieve their aims and ambitions.

I think that men dying at higher rates is a horrible thing

what if it's white men that are dying?

Oh, well then, something something patriarchy privilege. Because apparently at some point I was deemed an sjw?

wrong answer. enjoy the ban.

Agreed, educating women in the benefits of firearms would only lead to male strength being meaningless.

> implying edgelords don’t already reply to me in spades

Lol a jap getting upset over some suicide. Isnt that your national pastime?

Yeah i probably should have realized that. The Japanese are all about efficiency and would have been asking the same questions as u/cuckslovetrump

Meanwhile on reddit, there's an entire subreddit that thinks female depression is myth.

r/incels?

Yeah, but I think I've seen similar sentiment around on reddit before incels.

I think they mean the female orgasm.

Women do all kinds of shit for attention why not suicide

Men choose more violent methods by which to attempt suicide. It doesn't mean they're more serious about it than women.

Probably so. That does make it a worse problem, since we have a higher death count here.

u/two__sheds, people can't recover from their depression if their suicide attempt when through. So while women attempts suicide more often, the failed attempts will (hopefully) give them another shot at recovery. Men don't enjoy this privilege because they went for the "go big or go home" approach.

I agree with /u/two__sheds here, it's the patriarchy's fault that women are bad at killing themselves. Which means that if we destroy the patriarchy, more women will end up dead. This is why as a woke good boy feminist I completely support misogyny.

To think of all the lives I've probably saved simply by harassing women online. Feminists should give me some sort of award for my service.

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/u/two__sheds you're right, men do commit more violent suicides, just ask Maddox. If I were you, I would suggest following his strategies.