You're saving the glue outta frame for desert, right?

Dessert, neanderfuckup.

Not knowing

You must have had a lot of good boy points to get those tendies and fries.

You have to eat a furburger if you want chicken tendies.

Now with added cancer!

Snapshots:

1. This Post - archive.org, megalodon.jp*, archive.is

^{I am a bot. (Info / Contact)}

sentience

Snappy is just Tay AI reborn

🤩🤩

Give me, give me, chicken tendies Be they crispy, or from Wendy's Spend my hard-earned good boy points On Kid's Meal ball pit burger joints

Mommy lifts me to the car To find me tendies near and far Enjoy my tasty tendie treats In comfy big boy booster seats

McDonald's, Hardee's, Popeye's, Cane's But of my tendies none remains She tries to make me take a nappy But sleeping doesn't make me happy

Tendies are the only food That puts me in the napping mood I'll scream, I'll shout, I'll make a fuss I'll scratch, I'll bite, I'll even cuss!

Tendies are my heart's desire Fueled by raging, hungry fire Mommy sobs, and wails, and cries But tears aren't tendies, nugs or fries

My good boy points were fairly earned To buy the tendies that I've yearned But there's no tendies on my plate Did mommy think that I'd just ate?!

Tendies, tendies, get them now! You fat, ungrateful, sluggish sow!

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

poet laureate.

Vocaroo. Now.

>being this new

Yes I'm aware of the video, newfag.

But tears aren't tendies, nugs or fries

ain't fits the meter better

goddammit, i swear every time i leave town for business your mother just lets you do whatever the fuck you want. tell that worthless bitch to call me asap

TEEEENDDIEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSZZZZZZ

too many starches where are your veggies

I am posting here in the hopes that you will help my to find my son. He is 43 years old and suffers from ASD. His computer was left open to this page, and the “d” “r” “a” “m” “a” keys are slick with chicken tender grease, so I know he must visit this community frequently.

For the most part my baby boy is non-verbal, but he does have a few word approximations that he uses to ask his mummy for his favourite things (bussy = chicken tenders, gussy = Mountain Dew, honey bussy = honey mustard dipping sauce, etc.). However, he mostly communicates by making shrieking sounds and banging on the walls until I bring him chicken tenders. He is a growing boy, after all!

I made a huge mistake earlier this afternoon when I let my stupid (now ex) boyfriend Sven persuade me to purée a small amount of cauliflower into the batter I use to coat my baby boy’s chicken tenders before I deep fry them. You see, because my son has autism he only eats a handful of foods, and his doctors have advised me to just let him have whatever foods he likes due to his severe condition. Sven is a well known local volunteer softball coach, so his health and physical appearance are obviously very important to him and an important part of his career. This was how he convinced me to try to deceive my sweet good boy. He said “he is retarded Elena! He will never notice such a small amount of cauliflower in his food! He barely chews it, and drowns it in honey mustard for fuck’s sake! The boy needs to start eating healthy foods or he’s gonna drop dead of a heart attack! You are the parent Elena!” So I did the unthinkable. I added the tiniest bit of cauliflower purée to his chicken tender batter. My poor sweet boy!!!!! Of course he noticed right away when I brought him his 4pm pre-dinner snack :( before he even tasted them he started shrieking and screaming “vegetals!! vegetals!!!” He threw the platter of chicken on the floor and started throwing his feces and urine around his bedroom and at myself and my boyfriend (my son is not able to use the restroom due to being morbidly obese and unable to fit through a standard door frame, so he often uses bottles and bowls to relieve himself in his bedroom - such a big boy!). I was so proud of my good boy for using a new word, (vegetables!) but instead of celebrating his growth, I am sobbing because my sweet boy is now missing!

When I ran to the kitchen to make him some fresh unadulterated chicken tenders before he became famished from his tantrum, he must have run full speed into the wall of his bedroom, which is an exterior wall. Sonehow, he crashed right through the wall! I guess on account of his heavy set frame and his extreme rage (induced by my horrible deception)? By the time I got back to his room to investigate the crashing sound, he had already disappeared! I know he had planned to leave for good, too, because he took his Asian lady body pillow with him.

I have contacted the local police, but they just told me he is a “grown man” and there’s nothing they can do until he has been missing for at least 48 hours!!! He will starve to death by then!!! I am so lost without my good boy.

Of course, I immediately kicked my boyfriend out of the house and told him never to come near me or my sweetie again!!! I also put several platters of fresh chicken tenders with chocolate milk and Mountain Dew around the house and in the nearby woods, but so far they all remain untouched :(

I’m hoping against all hopes that somehow my good boy will read this, or reach out to one of his internet friends and you can relay my message to him.

My dear sweet good boy,

Mummy is so sorry for what she did to you. She will never ever ever add any vegetables to your chicken tenders ever again!! That awful Sven is gone forever from our lives! It will always be just you and mummy. You will not need to worry about any more “good boy points” because I have awarded you 100,000,000 of them and chicken tenders will always cost 0 points. Please come home!!!

Love,

Mummy xoxoxoxox

If any of you are local friends to my snuggly boy, and he approaches you in person please be careful! He is startled easily and becomes enraged and violent. The best thing you can do is put out plenty of chicken tenders and chocolate milk to keep him busy eating while you contact me so I can come and get him. And do NOT touch that body pillow!!!

Hey, so maybe those letters are greased because he was typing "Ramadam." Ever think of that you fucking CIS breeder racist.

Are you he didn't just misspell merde a lot? E's and A's aren't that far apart.

No slaw extra toast 👌

no slaw

what are you, 4?

Eating mayo communion.

OUT!

seattle

drink bleach

HEY MOTHERFUCKER, ILL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT SEATTLE NOT ONLYNINVENTED THE INTERNET, THEY HAVE A GOD DAMNED GOOD GRASP ON BOTH POLITICS AND SOCIAL ISSUES.

WHAER ARE HOU FROM HUH? POORTLAND? HAHA I LAFF CAUSE POORTLAND IS LITERALLY ANTI-FUN.

CONSIDER YOURSELF BLOCKED, SPORT

goddamn youre a fucking retard. tell your handler im sorry

HAHA are you sorry yet???

sorry about what a bitch you are

seriousposting

lol pwn trash

SEATTLE

SOY

BOY

Seattle

Soyattle

Soy battle

Soy asshole

Soy rathole

Soy borehole

Soy boyhole

Soy gloryhole

Soy goy boy

Soy goy

Soy boy

So?

ikr literally the only reason Portland exists is no sales tax

leave portland out of this, you fucking jerk.

instant downvote, cute. fucking redditor scum

I'm, right now, logging into all 30 of my accounts to downvote everything you've ever posted.

Say goodbye to your precious karma, kiddo

good one NEET fucktard faggot

drown in hippy cum

wanna snort some fent?

For realsies?

What do I owe you?

you have to suck off u/pizzashill

How many times

I'm, right now, logging into all 30 of my accounts to upvote everything you've ever posted.

Say goodbye to the integrity of your karma, kiddo.

do it again ass-baby

fucking mayo trash

get raped by pnw red neck farmers

Ah, I See You're a Man of Culture As Well

What's your wife's boyfriend having?

You moron. You imbecel.

Is that chipotle mayo?

Nah, it's a from a chain called Raising Cane's and it's their special sauce, can't remember what's in it tho. Probably soy or ketchup or something.

Do you not have real friends to show this to?

REEEEEEE VEGETALS TOUCHING TENDIES

ooh i love canes

Top notch.

Zaxbys is better fite me irl

hahaha thats so fuckin stupid holy shit

u know what these tendies need? a slice of american cheese

-- u, an idiot

How many piss jugs did bitch mommy make you empty for such a feast?

All I 👀 want are 🐓chicken🐓 tenders🍗

Fresh from the hands✋ of the 🍗tendie vendors

Chunks of 🐣chicken🐣 I will toss

Into spicy🍛 mustard sauce

👱Mommy👱, I am hungry - famished

Those nuggies on🔛 my 🍽plate🍽 have vanished

I suggest you get me ➕more➕

Now🕥, not later🕑, fucking whore!

I scream😱 and shout 😠 and wet 💦 my diapies

My bum🍑 needs soothing 💦wipey wipeys💦.

Do you want me to get a🅰️ rash😠?

😫Only you would be so🆘 brash😫

This is why my 👨daddy's👨 gone🏃

I'm 😞ashamed to call📲📲 you 👱mom👪.

👱Mommy 😭cries 😭, and fills my 🍽 plate 🍽

Tries to douse my 🔥flaming🔥 💢hate😡

🐓Tendies🐓 are the only thing

That seem to ease the gripping 😡pain😡

The pain within my hungry tummy

Feed your 👼baby👼, feed me mummy👱!

Those sweet 🍯 🍗tendies 🐓 in my tum

Mask my stinging rashy bum🍑

👱Mommy sits💺 and has🈶 🅰️a🅰️ drink🚱

The only 🕦time🕦 that she can 💁think

Is when her baby👼 has his treat

Of chocolate🍫 milk🍼 and chicken🐓🐓 meat 🍲🍲

😭Mommy👱 knows what😦 she must do😭

While her baby👶 has ❌no ❌❌ clue🗝

Pulls the trigger🔫, flash📸 of 🕯light🕯🕯

✅Now it's over, all is right✅

🎧Silence🔇 graces 👱mommy's ears👂

😏Smiles through the streaming 😭tears😭

No more➕ 🍗tendies🍗, poop💩 or pee💦

The pain is over, mommy's free💜

This was beautiful. 😪

What are some other movies where the villain wins in the end?

Killing your child isn't villainy. It's just fleeting tranquility.

New hot take on abortion.

Did you not have enough Good Boy Points for the Caniac combo? Loser.

Fish and chips is my favorite euro dish. Nice bro 👍

No Caniac combo? This is how the democrats win.

I'm a sucker for the gym. Haven't played a video game in over a year, I just work out, study, and have fun in real life. I think it'll be a good routine for college next year, I just hope I can resist smashin too many flowers because I do know it's smart to be safe about that. I'm writing a snog about what it means to be a man and what I've learned over the past year as a Senior2018 man :)

the fuck did you get lost? or did i eat teh pasta

Jesus fucking Christ Cain's chicken is actually beyond what chicken should taste like, the perfect tendies.

MasterLawlz confirmed not living in Master Race PNW

ask him i dunno

LET THE TENDIES HIT THE FLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR

Nice man, enjoy!

But what is our most illustrious mod, /u/xNotch, having for dinner?

Bussy tendies.

Ok

The state of modposting in 2018

Aw shit!

Dick

You fucker are too busy memeing to understand the glory that is Raisin cains

Those actually look pretty good tbh

shitty food?

The internet can say what it wants, Chicken and Fries is an easy go-to that's fairly decent no matter where you order it.

What the actual fuck is going on here? What is with chicken strips?

I hope you enjoy your food

I love raising cane's tendies

Canes? Where in the deep ass south are you?

Raising Cane's chicken is just about as salty as most of your comments, Lawlz.