I'm back, baby!

234  2018-08-22 by MasterLawlz

For those of you that were unaware, yesterday, August 22nd in the current year +3, at approximately 2100 hours, your beloved moderator MasterLawlz was stripped of his title. That's right, the man who brought you so much joy was removed of his ability to do so.

I will never forget the cold stare my computer screen gave me as it read "MasterLawlz: You have been removed as a moderator from r/Drama.". I turned off my computer and looked at what little I could make of my pale reflection in the screen. A silence washed over the dimly lit room consisting just of me and my laptop covered in Pepe the frog stickers which sat atop my underwear which had long since crusted over with dried semen.

I thought to myself: Is this it? Is my life over? My one true reason for existing is no more. Should I end it right now?

But then a thought occurred to me: what if this was just the beginning? Was I now finally free of the life I had chosen? Could I now do the things that God intended like traveling? Or feeling the embrace of a woman? Could I become a functioning member of society that is able to go to bed every day knowing he is benefiting the world and the people around him while also enjoying everything life has to offer?

But now I don't have to worry about any of that stupid shit anymore because I'm back, motherfuckers! Give me your upvotes!!!

89 comments

1  gaynazifurry4bernie 2018-08-22

Praise be!

1  UmbellateSaxhorn 2018-08-22

F

1  Butch_Patterson 2018-08-22

Praise TayTay!

1  AnnoysTheGoys 2018-08-22

You're stuck with us

1  JasonJewn0va 2018-08-22

What's that song called again? Stuck in the shower with you?

1  GadolBoobies 2018-08-22

Stuck in the shower with Jews

1  YHofSuburbia 2018-08-22

He's not stuck in here with us, we're stuck in here with him

1  Yiin 2018-08-22

Uovote

1  muck4doo 2018-08-22

Like the pages of his tranny porn magazines.

1  Yiin 2018-08-22

No

He's free to flip through these.

1  MozzerDozzer 2018-08-22

They're sealed shut from his incessant cumming on them.

1  GadolBoobies 2018-08-22

Ed isn't a mod, what's the fucking point anymore?

1  SnapshillBot 2018-08-22

The people involved here probably don't even respect bussy all that much.

Snapshots:

  1. This Post - archive.org, megalodon.jp*, removeddit.com, archive.is

  2. r/Drama - archive.org, megalodon.jp*, archive.is*

I am a bot. (Info / Contact)

1  cmakk1012 2018-08-22

My CROPS are WATERED, my FACE is CLEAN

Truly God is bestowing His grace on us today

1  Yiin 2018-08-22

How many sons do you have?

1  froibo 2018-08-22

This has been one of the longest emotional rollercoasters I've ever been on.

1  GadolBoobies 2018-08-22

Why are we here? Just to suffer?

1  Yiin 2018-08-22

I'm here to laugh. But I'm not sure about you mortals.

1  SAC-Lawn_Gnome 2018-08-22

Like a Phoenix rising from the Ashes...

1  WarSanchez 2018-08-22

More like a fart seeping some liquid...

1  YameteOniichanItai 2018-08-22

Don't forget, you're here forever.

1  brudabruda 2018-08-22

This adage hits home often. I havent been in “normal” online communities ever since pol defiled my mid 20s mind in the start of 2015

It all started with DRUMPF!!!!

1  Jonny_Stranger 2018-08-22

Ah, that explains your brain melt.

1  brudabruda 2018-08-22

I dont do that shity anymore since 2016 when reddit invaded it for muh trump memeeees xxxddd

Theres quite a few i did that are still floating around. Mostly trump+magic the gathering character edits

1  Jonny_Stranger 2018-08-22

Wow that's awes super sad.

1  brudabruda 2018-08-22

I post on drama what do u expect?

1  songthatendstheworld 2018-08-22

Better

1  3E4K3RWRGZPR970NVH28 2018-08-22

There's the spirit. Let's turn this up a notch.

1  brudabruda 2018-08-22

listen up you fucking collosal faggot. who the fuck do you think you are?

huh? really? lets be honest here. you think you can come in here and start some shit? you wanna do this? right here right now? really?

got nothing better to do huh. fucking pansy ass loser. wow. look at you. I'll let you know that Im a skilled machinist making over 60k in a cost of living area of 101. you know what that makes me, a lord over you, a shit tier fucking min wage Walmart cuck like you? I make fucking money. fucking asshole.

so what the fuck are you trying to imply here? so what if I browsed pol in my day. it changes nothing about the fact that you are a min wage slave while i fucking rail in the cash to buy gold with my awesome job that requires, i know its hatespeech to you, a trained skill.

1  3E4K3RWRGZPR970NVH28 2018-08-22

You turned the knob the wrong way.

1  brudabruda 2018-08-22

wow epic one liner XD! good job, king fucking bugman of the Reddit is what I see when I look at you, loser.

1  HebrewHeadwear 2018-08-22

Try to calm down, mdegenerate

1  Yiin 2018-08-22

NICE alt

1  brudabruda 2018-08-22

Nice alt

1  vtesterlwg 2018-08-22

the right wy

1  Jaxius3 2018-08-22

OwO

1  EarnestNoMeta 2018-08-22

no let's not

1  ironicshitpostr 2018-08-22

Why

1  zenicaone 2018-08-22

traps and other gay shit

1  vtesterlwg 2018-08-22

/pol/ is god tbh

1  hyledog 2018-08-22

No, no, my friend. You’ve always been here.

1  KingWayneX 2018-08-22

Hes doing it for maggie

1  [deleted] 2018-08-22

[removed]

1  brudabruda 2018-08-22

BLESSED DAY!!!

1  CordialCalamity 2018-08-22

Slut

1  SamWhite 2018-08-22

That was a harrowing 20 hours. Welcome back.

1  insert-usr-name 2018-08-22

Told you they would just mod another retarded faggot - turns out they’re recycling their retardedness.

1  pepperouchau 2018-08-22

didn't read

1  MasterLawlz 2018-08-22

rude

1  AlecOzzyHillPitas 2018-08-22

Honestly your writing chops are quite passable. You should branch out into other subs full of people certain that they’ll be the next David Foster Wallace.

1  EarnestNoMeta 2018-08-22

praising the bare minimum of mental faculty

1  giroth 2018-08-22

/r/WritingPrompts

1  lickedTators 2018-08-22

"WP: You spend your days modding the dumbest subreddit, when suddenly you receive a message, "You have been demodded..."

1  BobMcBobGuy 2018-08-22

yay

1  Starship_Litterbox_C 2018-08-22

Yess

1  shaun_krant 2018-08-22

My grandfather is in the hospital with stage 10 terminal cancer, your shitposts are the only thing that keeps him going, each day he asks "is /u/masterlawlz new shitpost out yet!?" When you were de-modded I knew that giving him the bad news would kill him, and now I don't have to give him the bad news, for the sake of my grandpappy, good to have you back ☺

1  Barkasia 2018-08-22

But did he have terminal cancer before MasterLawlz started shitposting?

1  shaun_krant 2018-08-22

I will admit, the doctors have linked the tumors to masterlawlz posts but he believes all in all it was worth it.

1  SJCards 2018-08-22

https://m.imgur.com/wqMWK7z

1  Unicorn_Abattoir 2018-08-22

"man"

1  wwyzzerdd 2018-08-22

Hey Lawlz,

Long time listener, first time caller.

Please remove that stupid fucking sticky post about some degenerate redditard that's been sticked for days. Its a lame post and I don't give a fuck about that person.

Also please give /u/xNotch some food.

1  Redactor0 2018-08-22

I never doubted for a moment that you would prevail in the end.

1  MasterLawlz 2018-08-22

Thanks, brother

1  Alexlincoln2 2018-08-22

How many times have you been demodded?

1  MasterLawlz 2018-08-22

Too many to count

1  serialflamingo 2018-08-22

I didn't realise you were gone, so it didn't upset me if that's any consolation.

1  Yiin 2018-08-22

Upmod

1  YourLocalMonarchist 2018-08-22

thanks for reminding me to slit my fists!

1  ObsessedAussie 2018-08-22

Wow

1  AssHat_McGee_ 2018-08-22

man fuck you dude!

1  seenten 2018-08-22

ghey

1  rationalhuckleberry 2018-08-22

what if this was just the beginning?

No.

Was I now finally free of the life I had chosen?

No.

Could I now do the things that God had intended for me like traveling?

No.

Or feeling the embrace of a woman?

I'll admit I stopped to laugh for a good five minutes. No.

Could I become a functioning member of society that is able to go to bed every day knowing he is benefiting the world and the people around him while also enjoying everything life has to offer?

No.

Now welcome back bby!

1  JustANameWithNumbers 2018-08-22

Missed you habebe

1  Sai22 2018-08-22

I missed you BB

1  Thefbiman 2018-08-22

You were gone ?

1  MasterLawlz 2018-08-22

Yes, thank you for noticing

1  Thefbiman 2018-08-22

(っ˘ڡ˘ς)

1  reallyrunningnow 2018-08-22

But then a thought occurred to me: what if this was just the beginning? Was I now finally free of the life I had chosen? Could I now do the things that God had intended for me like traveling? Or feeling the embrace of a woman? Could I become a functioning member of society that is able to go to bed every day knowing he is benefiting the world and the people around him while also enjoying everything life has to offer?

Nah fam.

1  charming_tainter 2018-08-22

You should write Harry Potter fanfic erotica

1  giroth 2018-08-22

implying he's not doing that already

1  geraldo42 2018-08-22

Who demodded you?

1  MasterLawlz 2018-08-22

justcool I think

1  Yiin 2018-08-22

/u/ComedicSans does /u/justcool393 have ANY cool?
I say no.

1  ComedicSans 2018-08-22

Removing /u/MasterLawlz was kinda cool. So maybe?

1  DarkResurgence 2018-08-22

Get aids fag

1  PureGold07 2018-08-22

Literally like who

1  voicelesshoodwinker 2018-08-22

😄😍😘😜

1  Tony49UK 2018-08-22

!RedditGarlic

1  [deleted] 2018-08-22

[removed]

1  DistortedLines 2018-08-22

Welcome! My new Taypost is in your honor

1  CocoNutsOn 2018-08-22

Sweet.

1  DoubleGarlic 2018-08-22

who?

1  Flag-Assault 2018-08-22

I'm confused? Can someone explain like I'm five?

1  EarnestNoMeta 2018-08-22

zzzziiiip

1  dogDroolsCatsRules 2018-08-22

Noice.

1  HodorTheDoorHolder 2018-08-22

We all float down here

1  GrittyOil 2018-08-22

this is gay

1  FrostBittenSalsa 2018-08-22

Post bussy and then you'll get the upvotes you crave

1  jaredschaffer27 2018-08-22

I remember this one guy I met, he was dating one of my ex's friends. We met up with them in Buffalo, New York (home of hipsters and used condoms on the ground.) Anyways he used to watch this pawn shop show where people would come in desperate for (drug) money and he would laugh at the whole spectacle. When asked why he liked the show so much, he said without a moment's hesitation "because these people have such shitty lives, it makes me feel better about my own." 2012 me thought that was an embarrassingly grotesque thing to feel and subsequently to say out loud to other people.

However, I can't help but feel the exact same way he does, only instead of shitty reality TV shows, it's your digital life. Glad you're back, lawlz.