Boomers try making a website, forget it's not the 90s and Geocities is no longer a thing.

343  2018-08-24 by IAmAN00bie

190 comments

You have to see the website for yourself. It's so bad it's fucking hilarious.

It's a thing of beauty. Brought a tear to my eye

I’m fully erect and don’t really know why

v a p o r w a v e

I'm pretty sure that site is satire. It looks purposely bad. Gives me a hypnospace vibe.

You could say that about the entirety of the Qult. It's all too retarded to be believed.

It won't seem retarded when you wake up with Don Lemon pointing a gun to your head

...again?

I had flashbacks of my first angelfire website.

This confirms to me that that sub is LARPing.

While this is definitely satire, I'm going to guess that it actually took a lot of effort to intentionally make it look that hilarious.

Nah, all you need is a pirated copy of MS Frontpage 97.

Look up Yvette's Bridal. It is the ultimate shitty website.

On the opposite end of the spectrum for 'types of shitty', yet still shitty, I give you the legendary: http://timecube.2enp.com/

The wild don't changes combined with gibberish vaguely resemble English make reading it hurt.

It was built by a 72-year-old! Let them have their fun. They're not hurting anyone.

Kys

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Would that I could.

does that mean knights in satans service?

Get out cracker

no kys comments. banned.

[removed]

Except when they crawl out of their retirement homes to vote

That should be stopped, absolutely.

makes me want to throw on hit up AOL chat, maybe later throw on my jnccos and rollerblade up to the store for a Dr pepper... dammit sniff

Dr pepper.

I think you mean Surge/Kick

the thing about Dr pepper at the time is you could look under the cap and find free ones without opening them if you knew how

And it still loads faster than the average js-filled webshit page.
The insecure connection warning on resources tho...

It takes ages to load, it's plastered with images.

On my old laptop it takes ~6 seconds to become usable, even if many images and vids still are loading.
Big newspaper websites can easily take 20 or 30 seconds because of obscene amounts of blocking js.

Of course, on a faster device they both take a lot less.

Sorry, thought you meant time till fully loaded. Tbh the website loses quite a bit without the images.

There's no way to make something that perfect without a ton of skill. No way he is a boomer.

I was pretty sure it was a poisoning-the-well attempt by some TopCucksofReddit user, but no, it's actually a legit site probably made by some domain host wizard. Tragic.

The large text is great. So easy on my eyes.

Noobie! How are you.

And what's Spicer going to say, "Oh yeah, it's all legit!" First of all, he's not even one of the 10, and you can tell Trump wouldn't let him in on it. And second of all, if he did say that, it would just make tons of people bombard him with more questions about it, which he really knows nothing about. This is top level Military Intel at the highest level of Classified Clearance.

Snapshots:

  1. This Post - archive.org, megalodon.jp*, removeddit.com, archive.is

I am a bot. (Info / Contact)

haha what the fuck. That site is something else. I'm shocked it doesn't have a "visitors" tracker on there too

Or a top 8 friends and an annoying autoplay unclosable ad..

definitely needs one of these on there too

Someone should hack the website, put that baby gif in there, then start a thread on GA claiming the website is a psyop run by pedophiles trying to indoctrinate Q followers.

needs more dancing alien

There was one on r/ayylmao

ヽ༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ ノ Raise ur dongers!

Dongers Raised: 37199

Check Out /r/AyyLmao2DongerBot For More Info

It does have a 3D "We Salute Our Veterans" guy on the top of the 'Q-codes'.

Ummm NO! THE QANONS ARE FIGHTING THE LIBERAL PEDOPHILES! A DANCING BABY WOULD PROBABLY BE ON SOMETHING LIKE CNN!!! (Children Nadmirer Network)

SAY SOMETHING!

WAWT?!

an annoying autoplay unclosable ad.

Sorry sweaty but,

This web site is AD FREE just a patriot trying his best to Red Pill as
many as I can before it's too late.
From a 72-year-old veteran

Inshallah he shall lead the masses towards Trump's Holyhead.

and an annoying autoplay unclosable ad..

Thats not really 90s, 90s would be a bunch of popups.

Spinning fire skulls

Top left corner my dude. It's no surprise you can't follow the breadcrumbs.

hah oh shit. Normally there's a big header pointing it out

Where's the visitor tracker? All I see in the top-left corner is this.

under_construction.gif

Needs more webrings.

This has to be a troll. I think half of these Q people are just going along with the boomer meme.

Which I fucking hate because I drink Zero Ultra White.

Yesterday on the way to work, I saw some ~65 year old lady standing on an overpass holding a giant green sign with a huge purple Q on it. These people are completely insane.

Of course, I honked at her. Gotta keep the lolcows going.

Of course, I honked at her. Gotta keep the lolcows going

Thank you for your service

Braver than our troops.

boomers love that shit dude. my parents, who are about that age, read a front page washington times article about that shit and are now completely on board. dad asked me if i knew what /pol/ was the other day.

Gotta keep the lolcows mooing*

ftfy

I actually really like that website lmao

It reminds me of what things were like back in the day when there was a big element of exploration to finding and clicking through websites. Because nobody knew how design one competently.

I dunno, I'm not sure I'd file every website looking the exact same under "competent".

If you're providing an online service then people need to be able to accomplish whatever task they're trying to do as easily as possible, with some caveats and exceptions depending on the circumstance, e.g. if your target userbase is hardcore Linux fans then they're not going to like a distro that works like an Apple product.

It reminds me of something I would’ve seen on Portal of Evil

What is it about this particular conspiracy that's so attractive to geriatric types? They didn't all hop aboard Pizzagate like this

It's all the Cheesus parallelisms, I think. Pizzagators huffed and puffed about Satanic black magic pedo rituals in basements, but few went as far as to compare Trump with the second coming of the All-Mighty. Q crossed that line.

It's the 90s style satanic panic angle. Boomers generally (there are exceptions) don't get involved in generic neonazi /pol/ tier WW2 revisionism or MDE style ""post-ironic"" humor, but they can't get enough of weird new-age Evangelical Christian Dan Brown stuff.

It's the 90s style satanic panic angle.

Isn't that more or less what pizza gate was?

Yeah, which is why Pizzagate is fully integrated into the Qonspiracy.

Pizzagate didn't annoying Trump gods chosen. With Q all these mediocre fucks get to larp that they are gods warriors doing the work of the gud book

It was missing the thriller, conspiracy mastermind angle.

That is... really well put. Thanks.

Its like epic sudoku or crosswords for them so they can feel important again and pretend to themselves that their withered boomer brains are still sharp.

It's all the leaded gasoline fumes they huffed as children finally kicking in.

It is a Grand Unifying Conspiracy Theory (GUCT). It combines many different conspiracy theories with mentions of Deep State Secrecy, Evil Corporate Elites, and Satanic (aka non-boomer religion) Influences in pop culture. The biggest draw is the idea that you can join the fight since "the storm is coming" and your irreverant support to President Boomer himself and purchasing merchanise with obscure acronyms on them will end the war on Christ.
Remember, Liberals kill their babies to save them from embarassing themselves, while Conservatives let them grow old enough to learn how to make a webpage and produce amazing content like these.

The Q shit is literally a part of Pizzagate.

You should ask /u/snallygaster.

I’m more impressed than anything tbh; the fact that a boomer was able to piece this together shows they’ll be able to make Web 2.0 pages when 2030 rolls around.

BOOMER YEAH!

This has to be a joke or a troll or something.

Shitty little things like disabling right click, and Hiding the registrar info behind a canadian privacy company.

Tons of broken JS and elements, and shit that keeps trying to load.

Yet all made to look like it was made by an idiot.

I wouldn't go back and certainly wouldn't click on anything there.

Another one of these Sacha Baron Cohen sites?

Really has that look about it. Something this bad has to be intentional. Anonymous DNS registrations is incredibly common though.

Ehh That or something else possibly malicious.

And yeah Anonymous registrations are common but this site is so poorly designed and you'd think the designer would almost be too stupid to realize registrar data was searchable.

Some registrars will offer anonymous registration by default and for free these days.

Thanks daddy GDPR

Yeah he's put multiple misaligned gifs of filing cabinets but managed to embed YouTube videos? I mean it's not hard to embed a video but it suggests a familiarity with the internet in the last decade.

Russians?

I didn't take too deep a dive cause I have actual work to do but my guess would be someone with a little actual web dev experience trying real hard to make it look like a boomer put this together so they could troll the Qultists.

I want to say this is too advanced for an actual idiot but theres a lot of exception idiots out there now.

I would be inclined to agree, however this guy has post history and doesn't seem like a troll.

Registrar privacy is pretty common on most hosts, no?

To be honest I haven't worked in that area for a while and in a previous job we had clients who required any site they worked with to be clear and open about who owns it. So that little qualm of mine about the site is probably just my bias.

Plenty of other things wrong with that site though.

This makes me want to make a react site but style it terribly.

Doesn't look like it was made by an idiot, just someone who's used to older web pages and didn't use a template

This has to be a joke or a troll or something.

Yes, qanon is a joke/troll.

I REALLY wish this were true. I browse through GA fairly often just out of pure intrigue. It's unreal how out of touch with reality the majority of people over there are. While truly believing they are helping to expose the greatest conspiracy in history. The hardest part for me to stomach though is they REALLY believe Trump is a genius. How anyone can come to that conclusion while having access to his Twitter(or just the Internet) feed blows my mind.

He's saying qanon is a troll not the retards who fall for it

Ahh, damn, it was very obvious when I reread. I REALLLLY hope it's revealed that SBC is indeed Q.

Here's an archive of it.

http://archive.is/HLX7y

Nice site patriot. Looks well put together.

oof

Oof indeed! You have oofed 1 time(s).


I am a bot. Comment ?stop for me to stop responding to your comments.

oof

Oof indeed! U oofed twice. Cunt.

oof

Oof indeed! You have oofed 3 time(s).


I am a bot. Comment ?stop for me to stop responding to your comments.

oof

Oof once, oof twice, oof once more - three more oofs to rhyme with dicks.

Oof indeed! You have oofed 6 time(s).


I am a bot. Comment ?stop for me to stop responding to your comments.

Thrice oof, thrice twice, thrice again, put them where the sun don't shine.

oof

oof

woof 🐶

YIkes...

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Great username, btw.

You're guaranteed to shed pounds within hours.

Was it southbronxparadisediet related?

Yes! Aqua Teens for life!

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No you 🤡🌎

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I know ya'll need your programming practice, but this bot is the most retarded one I have seen yet. Can't you come up with something useful?

I was 100% convinced that was in a subreddit that was mocking GA. Can't say I was totally surprised when I realized it was actually in GA though. That's a special breed over there.

This is the best! The videos, links, etc (including ominous placement of nazi/punisher-esque skulls "Are we the baddies?") make Q look like a movement of insane villains bent on destroying America. Are Boomers really this retarded?

Nice site patriot. Looks well put together.

This is what I said when I first logged on to Reddit dot com.

Use old.reddit.com

You had to go back 4 days to find them doing something dumb and embarrassing?

Hey guys I found something dumb and embarrassing from an hour ago!

N-no! You're the dumb and embarrassing one, not me!

It was posted in the comments of /r/topmindsofreddit.

This is the best website I've ever seen. Unironically. Reminds me of 1998 again.

I legit hope I die from natural causes or doing something heroic before I become like this.

There's always suicide

He already said doing something heroic

Seeing this makes me miss Stickdeath.com.

Stick... what?

Heh... not surprised you haven't heard of it, normie. It's a site where we watched the most bada$$ flash animations of stick people ninjas fighting and killing each other.

:')

The xiaoxiao ones were the creme de la creme

look at me i'm so smart because i was born in 1996

I refuse to believe this is real. That entire sub is trolls egging on a handful of mentally ill posters

That's pretty much reddit described as concisely as possible.

Remember that episode of the Simpsons where Homer made a website?

Seems like the rumors about Sacha Barron Cohen being Q are true.

What Is Satire ?

Something qtards are incapable of grasping.

I thought Gene Ray was dead...

Made by a 72 year old veteran

This can't be real.

there is zero chance this website was made by a boomer. It has to have been made by a creative troll to look like a hyerbolic boomer creation. Which i applaud as it it is brilliant.

This is wonderful fuck the haters.

There is neocities, though.

It's not a badthing.

Oh my god. This is perfect. I love the animated gifs, like the "videos" and "We salute our veterans." They are straight out of a 90s website. Where the hell did he even find them?

Jesus Christ the amount of 3rd party domains hooked up to that thing.

It's a 21st century website with a 20th century aesthetic

Makes me think this is all a rather smartly crafted ruse to appeal to a certain kind of mindset.

what are the prophecies?

http://www.slidewizards.com/

just going to the domain is even worse

It's one snoop dogg gif away from being a really complex blingee.

Bookmarked.

I was on that site for 30 seconds and i lost 5% of my battery

source is hella interesting

It's real!

It looks like they're out of Colorado / Red Rocks Church in Littleton, CO

Our guy?

Why do all schizophrenics and mentally ill conspiracy theorist's websites look close to the same? A hot mess of jumbed bullshit.

This site actually crashed my browser

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL 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You can type 10,000 characters and you decided that these were the one's that you wanted.

I am a bot. Contact for questions

The only time you've been a good bot

Democracy was a mistake, everyday our world become more like GTA V

best viewed in netscape navigator

...and thats a virus...

Don't u dare bully my 72-year old grandpa, he's a veteran and worked very hard on this.

When you learn site design from Matt Drudge to own the libs epic style 😎

Timecube eat your heart out. It's Chaturbate 2.0

I think I may have digital aids now

Oh nice I didn’t know they brought back Time Cube

Geocities is still a thing Whang! Has made a video on it. I would link but on phone

I downloaded something from one of the link. I feel like I am going to wake up with "WWG1WGA" tattoed across my face.

YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID!

TIMECUBE!

Many Are Getting Arrested

Are we sure this site isn't satire? It's freakin beautiful.

I want to believe.

How is someone that dumb allowed to vote? It looks like they need adult supervision to go to the bathroom, much less make websites.

Im not convinced this isnt high level elaborate satire

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST MY EYES

From their abbreviations list:

ASF - - - Apache Software Foundation

Like, a dumping ground for dead Google projects is somehow a big deal?

When I saw Q code list as the title I thought it will be one of those awful ham radio websites.