Hell hath no fury like a suburban soccer mom cucked, I guess.

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What is "semen retention" it sounds painful and like some bluepill bullshit.

This

daddy kubrick

Praise Nolan

funny enough its the redpill crowd that overlaps with the nofap crowd

Semen retention is unironically an ancient Chinese secret to long life, mystical powers, and possibly immortality.

It's a Classical Chinese literary trope that some she-demon or other, usually a qt fox spirit, will try to steal the semen of a shy nerdy scholar by fucking him rapaciously night after night. Usually the scholar dies, or finds out before the fox is able to make her immortality potion out of his cum. Quite often the tragic angle is played up, where they both genuinely love each other but can't fug because scholar dude's gonna die.

She's retarded and he's obsessed with her. They should get married.

Since then I asked her what her problem was and said its because she isnt attracted to me because I am not productive, lack meaningful conversations and live like a pig. But if I fixed these things, than maybe we could sleep together once in a while. Since then I kept my place really clean and she told me it's not enough that I need to fix everything else.

ayy lmao

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fuckoff

But if I fixed these things, than maybe we could sleep together once in a while.

If there were online betting markets for incel chances, I would short the fuck out of this.

being either a skinny fat or a fat fuck probably doesn't help

So she got her autistic rapemerican basement-dwelling roommate to clean up his nest by promising him gussy, what a champ

Is this roommate actually Jordan Peterson in a blonde wig?

Are we sure this isn't Jordan Peterson in a wig

How is she retarded?

rooming with someone who will undoubtedly eventually murder her

If even half of the stuff about her hanging around with a dude who was going to cheat on his wife with her is true she's a fucking idiot

nah shes just a fukken thot

some1 needs to warn this gussy xe has a cuck about to go mayo-american on xer 🔫🔫🔫

YIKES 😬😬😬

Lmao, even r/Semenretention is calling him a loser:

What a kuk boi lol

What is this millennial bullshit?

It's semen retention bro. Learn to conserve your life force, old man

No wonder kids these days are so miserable.

Someone watched Dr. Strangelove and took the insane ramblings of that military dude seriously

It really is hilarious how apt those scenes are for this phenomena.

Tbf it's pretty much the most quotable movie

"You can't fight in here! This is the War Room!"

"Doomsday machine? Hell I wish we had one of those!"

Look. This is like Taoism 101, ok nerd? You don't squirt, and you lick that pussy like every drip and drop and drab is adding a day to your lifespan, because it is.

Now bring me my opium.

Incels trying to cuck themselves?

I think it is a combination of combined puritan stayovers where "all sex is wrong," guilt at their own masturbation, trying to get some semblance of control over their situation, "I'm sexually frustrated by choice," obsession over pseudo science and testosterone and what they think it means to be a man, and a good old fashioned people jumping on the bandwaggon for the lols to see how many people they can get to be more frustrated and upset at themselves for their own weakness.

Not to mention a chunk of "Women, er, women sense my power, and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, Mandrake...but I do deny them my essence." Tossed in.

Semen retention is chinese at the start but chinamen that did it were chad and still fucked women, they just didn't gave them their sperm.

That sounds worse than being an incel

t. incel.

incels think nothing is worse than being an incel, so maybe ur the incel

n-no u

Weak.

Sounds like a description of your spindly incel arms.

My combat noodle are not incels like reeeeeeee

If they're so desperate for test, why don't they just hop on a cycle

It's old thing but it's died for reason. Ofc retards in internet started to do it.

Time for them to die off too, nature finds a way

Imagine a world where Hentai exists and you decide masturbating is bad lol

Weebs raus

>low iq: fapping to hentai
>mid iq: not fapping at all
>high iq: not fapping but still read all hentai you come across

Jesus I thought that sub was a circlejerk version of r/nofap unless I got baited, they literally talk as if not nutting made them start making 300k a week after working at McDonalds

The they are right. I haven't nutted since November and during this period of time I have completed a lot of projects that I have been putting off.

Yeah like jerking off

since November

You realize it's currently November?

since November of 1980

How dare you call her a thot! She is Muslim and she is pure. You are haram, may you have many failings in your day inshallah.

She is not pure seeing as she banged the married dude once, and the cucked semensaver twice

sorry a thot can't be a pure Muslim unless she married the local sultan

What the hell is wrong with these complete retards?

I immediately texted her and demanded that I needed my blow dryer (I didnt) I just wanted to disrupt whatever they were doing. About 20 mins later I hear them come downstairs and him quietly leave. She gave me the blow dryer and made me a sandwich

This all made sense until this part. Then it made no sense. She made you a sandwich and you hasn't even fucked her yet? Bullshit story

Look in his post history. He had sex with her twice.

LOL, what the fuck is he complaining about?

Literally EVERY femoid ever 🙄

Oh man that makes it so much more hilarious. She keeps him in the basement like a rarely used sex slave or some shit. Except he's a sex slave that buys her pizza and pays rent.

I might let you fuck me like once in a while maybe if you rub my feet buy me food and stop being such a slob.

OK I kind of see what kind of person this girl is now.

A smart person that takes advantage of some retard

Way to go, sister

...this has been a huge blow to me, its extremely depressing that I since we moved in have bought us pizza like 5 times, gave her footrubs and lent her money

I fucking bought 5 whole pizzas why wont the thot blow me REEEEE

pretty sure 5 pizzas are more costly than one blowie too :(

Depends on the size and if you got a special but you're still looking at around 50 bucks.

Yeah, the size matters. If she is around 300 pounds, the bj will be lot cheaper, but much more dangerous.

You just need to feed her a couple of pizzas first. When satiated fatties are relatively safe to handle and wont bite even if you touch their tongue, if you know what you're doing. https://youtu.be/xkDzR1cMdVk

The diabetic coma is the modern-day roofie

Don't hate on this bitch's hustle.

Her pussy game so strong she stumbled into a sugar daddy without even flashing her titties.

getting this riled up about Muslim booty

Muslim gf

Perfect tradwife material

GET

FUCKED

also what the hell is semen retention lmao, I see the first few posts and it looks like a circlejerk sub for r/nofap

It's similar, except these guys legit believe that by not wanking they "reabsorb" their semen, which cures cancer and gives them special powers.

Powers other than massive sexual frustration and self-loathing, I assume.

That sounds completely asenine

Look at things this way,if you are feeling glum just look at threads like that and realize your life isn't that pathetic.

Giving her pizza and some more eyebrows doesn't mean you get to have sex with her. How badly did that OPs parents fuck up raising him.

I don't think the kind of person who posts on a sub about semen retention had parents to raise them. Or any peers to socialize them. Smart money is on them being abandoned as a baby in the forest and being raised by a family of beavers or porcupines.

semen retention sub

I actually thought this was a joke, but it's literally the name of the subreddit.

The absolute state of white, Western males.

How do you poor losers find this shit?!

Holy shit this noFap trend is dumb as hell.

It's like shitty millennial horoscopes or something.

Eeeeh. Reading a bit more, they already fucked a couples of time and he is just angry that she will not do that again after doing what she wants.

He is an insane moron and she is a bitch that is using his desire for sex with her for benefits. I guess they're a cute couple kek

Good lord

Not a Dr. but I'm comfortable prescribing castration.

Um sweaty semen isn't in the balls it's mainly in the seminal vessicles and the prostate sweaty.

r/Semenretention is too stupid to realize you can retain semen levels by swallowing your own jizz after you're done.

how is it different to nofap?

Our precious bodily fluids