r/drama: The original virgin vs. Chad

The original virgin vs. Chad

253 2019-02-26 by MasterLawlz

106 comments

1 SnapshillBot 2019-02-26

Are you a literal NPC? First you had trouble counting to two, now you're just copy and pasting your replies. Do you need some time to update before you can type anything new?

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1 sokolovey 2019-02-26

But you're been THE eternal virgin since birth. Are you saying you were born after 2004?

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

You make me out as some kind of religious figure in that sentence

1 sokolovey 2019-02-26

Only the hand of Allah could keep a man as far away from gussy as you have done.

1 HardIsLife 2019-02-26

Both are kids 🚨

1 Seattle_Bussy_Lmao 2019-02-26

That’s the man right over there, Officer. Yes, with the grainy face and Pat-like demeanor.

1 ElonMuskarr 2019-02-26

Except Josh is chad now. And I have no idea what the fuck Drake Bell is up to other than tweeting controversial shit.

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

He's done a little bit of voice acting but not much else, it must be weird being a flash in the pan teen icon and then not doing much afterward

Zac Efron is one of the few that managed to make it out and still stay relevant

1 sixty_nine_69 2019-02-26

Unironically have you been successful dating and in tinder? Because you seem like a genuinely funny and good person but your shit posting makes me question about your success. And I'm rooting for you.

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

Two years ago I met up with a girl on tinder and got a blowjob out of it pretty much out of nowhere

and that was the only success I had with any kind of app or online dating lol and I haven't been dedicated enough to really try again, at first I thought it was awesome because I was hoping everyone would be that slutty

1 escebar_ortez 2019-02-26

she was a landwhale wasnt she

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

hey man it was better than nothing and I had nothing to do that evening

1 Chernozhopyy 2019-02-26

Plus fat chicks give the best head.

1 Welcometony1234 2019-02-26

Do they actually?

Also how much better are we talking? Enough to make it worth it?

1 Chernozhopyy 2019-02-26

Honestly yes, but you don't wanna let anyone find out.

1 Wheretheflowersgrow 2019-02-26

Nah that whole "fat girls fuck better" is a myth, their cardio is shit and less people want to fuck them so they have less experience.

1 Chernozhopyy 2019-02-26

What kind of degenerate do you think I am? I'd never stick my dick in a 🐳. But a blow job is a blow job

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

1 KingWayneX 2019-02-26

They dont fuck better, but they often suck better.

1 CCAlkie 2019-02-26

I'm unironically rooting for you Lawlzy.

1 RandolphCox 2019-02-26

you look at that as a fond memory but she prob looks at that as the lowest point in her life

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

one man's peak is another man's valley

1 RandolphCox 2019-02-26

you are wise masterlawz. i will give you that

1 kdbisgoat 2019-02-26

So you're saying it was a man

1 CirqueDuFuder 2019-02-26

Oh man, she was a trans too.

1 sixty_nine_69 2019-02-26

If you put in work and try to actually get to know them you can have some good experiences. Don't expect anything like that from a first date all the time and you'll have some success. Just have a positive outlook on it.

PS can you spread your ass cheeks and sticky a picture of your asshole I would really appreciate it. K luv u buh bye

1 SchizoDramaTard 2019-02-26

Would you consider yourself ugly?

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

idk I imagine I'm probably alright

1 SchizoDramaTard 2019-02-26

FUCK OFF LWLZZZ 🤬🤬🤬🤬🖕🏾🖕🏾🖕🏾🖕🏾🖕🏾🖕🏾

https://i.imgur.com/WLMJ6D7.jpg

1 jewdanksdad 2019-02-26

I look forward to your relevance being over.

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

You waiting for that day to come: https://media.giphy.com/media/Ts4dedatClXB6/giphy.gif

1 uniqueguy263 2019-02-26

When did it begin (

1 jewdanksdad 2019-02-26

Its more of the fact that certain people on this sub see the virgin as important

1 elephantofdoom 2019-02-26

It never Evan began for modcels.

1 DoesntSmellLikePalm 2019-02-26

Drake Bell’s music is super big in Mexico and Latin America. He’s always touring in Brazil and shit. Check out his insta and like 70% of the comments are from Hispanics

1 Subbs 2019-02-26

Drake "Taco" Bell

1 serialflamingo 2019-02-26

The biggest pop star in the world rn is literally a former Disney teen icon.

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

Yeah, Miley Cyrus and Ariana Grande have done well but in all fairness let’s not act like Miley’s dad wasn’t a huge part of that lol

1 serialflamingo 2019-02-26

Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake...

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

I’m not saying that there haven’t been successful teen celebrities, I’m just saying for everyone of them there’s 10 that didn’t

1 Pickled_Kagura 2019-02-26

People ignoring the hottest of them all: Selena Gomez.

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

Gross

1 Pickled_Kagura 2019-02-26

For someone that jerks off to Gwen, you have bad taste.

1 check_fugazi_bro 2019-02-26

He fucked up his hand so he can't make music anymore

1 theHennyPenny 2019-02-26

I once saw Drake Bell hanging out and sort of pacing right in front of TAO Asian Bistro in LA, clearly hoping the paparazzi/someone would notice him. That guy had no reason to step out of the restaurant and it showed. It took a good few minutes (and a phone call he placed) before anyone showed up to dutifully take photos of him before he went back inside.

So yeah, Bell is up to stuff like that.

1 fretit 2019-02-26

Drake Bell is

He looks 50 now

1 AssuredlyAThrowAway_ 2019-02-26

This is what Drake's been up to lol

1 Pickled_Kagura 2019-02-26

This is why we need the mayocide.

1 Runzatic 2019-02-26

2011

1 Coonass_alt 2019-02-26

>drake bell

JUST

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

He was in a recent YouTube video with Josh and looks perfectly fine

1 Coonass_alt 2019-02-26

>he's unJUSTed himself! i swear!

C O P E

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjYV-OrN8gM

1 Coonass_alt 2019-02-26

>those tattoos

J U S T

1 jaja10 2019-02-26

yeah, they both look good honestly

1 automated_russian 2019-02-26

The original peaked in highschool vs. “Chubby kid who got hot in college.*

1 Femicide 2019-02-26

is that real? holy shit he aged 40 years in a decade

1 KingWayneX 2019-02-26

He looks old, but hes still handsome. I think he'll be fine.

1 Shalabadoo 2019-02-26

Drake Bell’s Wikipedia page might honestly be more depressing than most genocides

Bell was arrested on December 21, 2015 for driving under the influence in Glendale, California at 2:45 AM after police officers witnessed him swerving and driving well over the speed limit.[138] He was subsequently released on $20,000 bond and pleaded not guilty.[139] On September 3, 2016, TMZ reported that Bell had been found guilty and sentenced to four days in jail and four years' probation and would be required to attend an alcohol education program; Bell served only one day for good behavior.[140][141] Bell had previously been charged with driving under the influence in 2010, in relation to an incident in San Diego in 2009.[142]

Bell was nominated for a Young Artist Award twice, once in 2000 for his role in The Jack Bull, in which he won,[161] and another time in 2006 for Yours, Mine and Ours. He has won 10 Kids Choice Awards, 3 in the United States and 5 internationally for his role as Drake Parker on Drake & Josh.[162] He also won a Kids Choice Award in 2007 in the United Kingdom for Best Male Singer, winning over Justin Timberlake.[163] He was also nominated for Best TV Actor, but lost to Nat Wolff.[164] Bell has also won a Teen Choice Award in 2008 for his role as the Dragonfly in Superhero Movie.[165] He was also nominated for an award in 2014 in the Capital Twitter Awards for biggest Twitter feud with Justin Bieber.[81]

1 LongPostBot 2019-02-26

Have you owned the libs yet?

I am a bot. Contact for questions

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

That really isn't that bad (aside from the DUI). It just seems like his career never really took off.

Now you wanna see a true depressing career? Mitchell Musso: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uj-Jo-5J6VI

1 miranda865 2019-02-26

Is that real?

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

yes, it's so cringy that it comes back around to being surrealist meme art

1 miranda865 2019-02-26

Omg they made the movie 😱

1 XhotwheelsloverX 2019-02-26

He looks like he wants to die

1 1029384756-mk2 2019-02-26

Comments:

So, who's career is more miserable?

Drake Bell's or Mitchell Musso?

3 years ago

Coincidence?

1 The_Pandemonium 2019-02-26

Wtf is going on here. One of my friends had a fling with drake bell after a concert, and he dropped her off in some random town at a bus stop i believe. My other friend was actually talking to Mitchell Musso on Instagram after she apparently had a dream of him and dm'd him.

1 Peetrius 2019-02-26

Drake Bell’s Wikipedia page might honestly be more depressing than most genocides.

/r/BrandNewSentence

1 -Steve_French- 2019-02-26

You need to leave

1 DarqWolff 2019-02-26

Removed, thank you for bringing it to my attention

1 -Steve_French- 2019-02-26

Just doing my part

1 mitochondriaistphotc 2019-02-26

I think there was a reddit comment taking about how he has a band that performs at highschool proms and about how hes an a hole or something

1 The_Pandemonium 2019-02-26

Can somewhat confirm second hand. My friend hooked up with him after a concert. He dropped her off at some random gas station while her phone was dead and pretty much said, "get home safe bud". I actually just looked up his concerts and found he's performing in a town over from mine. Might have to go check it out.

1 Wraith_GraveSpell 2019-02-26

Still probably has a more fulfilling life than Amanda Bynes.

1 OniTan 2019-02-26

Amanda is straight crazy.

1 KingWayneX 2019-02-26

Itd be worth it

1 Momruepari 2019-02-26

To be a true dramatard, you must be willing to stick your dick in crazy

1 whenweriiide 2019-02-26

Fuck dude I bet he still grieves over that '66 Mustang. What a terrible loss.

1 ChingChongMaoZedong 2019-02-26

FRIENDLY REMINDER DRAKE BELL LITERALLY LIVED ON THE GROUNDS OF DISNEY

1 BeiberFan123 2019-02-26

Josh turned into a chad for the last two seasons though. Apparently stayed that way.

Drake looks like he tried heroin once and decided to go back to meth.

1 IHeartCommyMommy 2019-02-26

OK so considering all of the child stars who grow up to be hot and how many sexual predators fill Hollywood they have to have someone who is an expert at determining if someone will grow up to be hot (and therefore more profitable long-term), do you guys think that one of Hollywood's ~~professional pedophiles~~ child casting directors saw Josh Peck and said "If he loses 200 pounds than hes gonna look really good when he's 20, let's hire him and make him into a long-term investment"?

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

I'm pretty sure they cast him to be the butt of most of the jokes so I highly doubt it

1 IHeartCommyMommy 2019-02-26

Have you ever considered trying to become a Chad? I want to see what would happen if instead of having thst ~~fucking goober~~ super neato discord picture you have now you swapped it for you smashing guts. I feel like it would be a pretty decent drama post tbh.

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

I have, I even wrote a song about it: https://old.reddit.com/r/Drama/comments/7390z7/i_wrote_a_theme_song_for_rdrama/

1 IHeartCommyMommy 2019-02-26

OK so what's stopping you now?

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

autism

1 IHeartCommyMommy 2019-02-26

Actual or proscribed by a faggot on reddit/4chan?

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

actual lol

1 IHeartCommyMommy 2019-02-26

Well God damn it I don't know how to teach actual autistic people how to communicate. Tbh I imagine in person you guys don't really use words so much as grunting sounds and clapping your hands like an excited seal.

Although you could diet and lift, do that enough and some Stacy will probably be able to look past your aspyism and swoon over your killer abs and shitposts

1 charming_tatum 2019-02-26

Who are these people?

1 MasterLawlz 2019-02-26

Drake and Josh

1 charming_tatum 2019-02-26

Oh, are they your friends from high school or something?

1 SociopathicCamper 2019-02-26

Begone vile Boomer

1 SithisTheDreadFather 2019-02-26

t. zoomer

1 check_fugazi_bro 2019-02-26

^ retard