I was looking for shit to do in my free time and I figured a cooking class could be fun. I looked around and apparently, the Art Institute of Dallas charges $30,000 for you to get a certificate (not a degree, mind you, but a certificate) for how to cook pastries.
94 2019-07-30 by MasterLawlz
Imagine racking up $30k in student loans and all you have to show for it is being able to cook mediocre tiramisu. That's how much it costs for just a little over a year of schooling. I kinda wish I could sit down with the parents who are apparently bankrolling that program every year and ask them at what age they realized their child would amount to nothing.
60 comments
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1 TonyDanzaClaus 2019-07-30
Who are the ad wizards who came up with this one??
1 goldfish_memories 2019-07-30
Certainly not the ad wizards who do it for free
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1 TheRootinTootinPutin 2019-07-30
Wait, are you unironically go1dfish?
1 Fletch71011 2019-07-30
I can't believe MasterLawlz of all people has been compromised.
1 charming_tatum 2019-07-30
On the job experience is always the way to go with cheffing. Find a catering company or a banquet hall that does upscale events and work for them 10-15 hrs a wk. You'll get paid and get good experience. If you feel like you have to go to culinary school go to CIA or another top notch school with top tier job placement
1 MasterLawlz 2019-07-30
lol no way would I want to cook for a living, I just want something to do to be less bored and to also maybe meet lonely housewives
1 charming_tatum 2019-07-30
You're gonna meet more people working somewhere than you would in classes and women who work in the hospitality business are usually slutty
1 MasterLawlz 2019-07-30
if you work for less than $50k per year then you're basically letting your employer fuck your wife
1 trapochaphouse 2019-07-30
At your age, yes. At my age $50k would be like letting the boss fuck my wife and my daughter at the same time.
1 CantWakeUpJPG 2019-07-30
*Hits pipe*
1 MrGoodieMob 2019-07-30
Dont you live with your parents and watch kids cartoons all day?
1 MasterLawlz 2019-07-30
No and no
1 MrGoodieMob 2019-07-30
Dont lie to me
1 RecallRethuglicans 2019-07-30
That’s why it’s time for a real living wage
1 collectijism 2019-07-30
Because they like to please others and found a way to profit from it. Now your calling them literal prostitutes? I cant believe how msyoginistic this sub has gotten
1 charming_tatum 2019-07-30
Lets unpack this. Nothing wrong with being slutty, not having a sex positive attitude is very problematic, sweaty
1 xlhat 2019-07-30
BUY👏YOUR👏DAUGHTER👏A👏DILDO👏SHITLORD👏.
1 Jas0nJewnova 2019-07-30
I think your best bet is to hang around abortion clinics
1 MasterLawlz 2019-07-30
Brilliant
1 Oh_hamburgers_ 2019-07-30
Go to one of those amateur painting sessions. They're like 50% divorced women looking to find themselves in a paintbrush and bottle of wine. They bring their crazy friend who will push them to do something out of character and "live a little" which is exactly where you come in and sweep them off their feet for a wild night of Ben 10 marathons and disappointing sex.
1 MiltonFriedmanisbae1 2019-07-30
I don't think lawlz would get to the sex stage. He'd probably be sticky posting IRL until she suddenly realizes she forgot to feed her cats.
1 Oh_hamburgers_ 2019-07-30
You never know, she might have some hidden inner autism that makes Lawlz sticky posting drive her wild. He's got that puppy to distract her from her cats too. I believe in him.
1 MiltonFriedmanisbae1 2019-07-30
Is Ben 10 getting old?
1 MasterLawlz 2019-07-30
no he's only like 16
1 MiltonFriedmanisbae1 2019-07-30
Too old for your taste
1 lilalaber 2019-07-30
Spoken like a true Friedmanian.
1 Feanorfanclub 2019-07-30
Lawlz half of this subreddit had seen your picture, if you want to get laid learning how to make more food should not be on your to do list. Maybe hit up that day of cope guy for tips.
1 Ardvarkeating101 2019-07-30
I do feel like assassinating people via drones is a good way to get critics to give me a good score
1 goldfish_memories 2019-07-30
Still better than being a mediocre telemarketer 🤭🤭🤭
1 MasterLawlz 2019-07-30
hey, I'm a very above average telemarketer
1 acidoverbasic 2019-07-30
Take a cooking class at Sur La Table and meet some milfs too.
1 Ill_Regal 2019-07-30
Dude you can learn how to cook without paying any money. PDFs of some in-depth cookbooks are public domain. The fuck is the point of a certificate
1 [deleted] 2019-07-30
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1 Ill_Regal 2019-07-30
I mean obviously not the same as practical experience but you don’t need to be spending exorbitant amounts of money to understand concepts in cooking.
1 seenten 2019-07-30
Watching britbongs bake on Netflix is sufficient, right?
1 [deleted] 2019-07-30
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1 collectijism 2019-07-30
Stirring sugar all day makes your teeth rot in a few years. So youll be in debt toothless and fat
1 bareballzthebitch 2019-07-30
Why can't you just collect stamps like normal people?
1 trexmundi 2019-07-30
Do they still make Toaster Strudels? I haven't had one of those in forever it feels like.
1 just_sauce 2019-07-30
They're just as good as you remember them being, I promise.
1 [deleted] 2019-07-30
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1 MzCherryBlossom 2019-07-30
Tiramisu isn’t a pastry. 🙄
1 Burnnoticelover 2019-07-30
www.masterlawlz.com
1 snallygaster 2019-07-30
iirc art institute is a for-profit school/mostly a scam, so you might be able to find cheaper alternatives at a community college or something. All good cooking/baking classes are pretty expensive tho, you'd be better off learning on your own through trial and error. If you can't learn how to make good food on your own with practice then you're a doomed cook
1 THOT-AUDITOR 2019-07-30
Yeah a bunch of their campuses abruptly shut down earlier this year. Turns out scamming middle-class kids out of their federal aid grants isn't a sound business model.
Thankfully, though, the one near my office closing means I don't have to stare at obese mayos, walking around looking like a tumblr zombie threw up on them, during my lunch break anymore.
1 snallygaster 2019-07-30
Damn, are they actually in trouble? I thought the for-profit schools were making bank but it must be harder for the art schools because they do actually have to buy supplies and shit.
I honestly feel bad for them; I know some people who went to art institutes (none of whom graduated 🤔) and it sounds like the recruiters are experts at telling directionless teens anything they need to hear to get their loan money
1 seenten 2019-07-30
They shut the one near me without any notice to the students. So they were left halfway through the semester with an untransferrable uncompleted degree.
I'm sure the people running the place are now retired with no repurcussion from the feds.
1 snallygaster 2019-07-30
Jesus christ, that's evil. Do you know if the students filed a suit?
1 seenten 2019-07-30
Never saw any followup news articles. I wouldn't be surprised if an attorney wouldn't touch that either.
1 MasterLawlz 2019-07-30
I didn’t actually know much about the larger company until you guys inspired me to google it and apparently the majority of their locations have been sold or shut down and only eight are left.
They’ve also been sued by teachers and students a ton of times but I can’t say I feel too bad for the students because if you didn’t realize the place was a scam then you kinda deserved to get scammed tbh
1 snallygaster 2019-07-30
The recruiters for for-profit schools are snakes that are taught to appeal to prospective (mostly troubled) students' hopes and dreams or vulnerabilities and it's even worse for aspiring artists because most programs are more or less money holes. There's a reason why unsupported teenagers, vets, and low-income students are their main prey. Their targets don't have the support, capacity, or experience to fend off the rhetoric of the recruiters at those schools. I mean, you even did research into the art institute and didn't figure out that it was a scam until someone told you on reddit. If somebody who was desperate for a career did the same research as you and talked to a snake recruiter, would you fault them for considering the same shit that you were?
1 MasterLawlz 2019-07-30
Considering it is one thing but when I checked it out back in high school I still thought the thing was overpriced and stupid, I just didn’t realize the scam was this high-level until now.
I get being misguided but if you look at a dessert cooking course with a price tag of $30k and think that’s a good idea then that’s on you tbh. I can sympathize with the student loan problem to some degree but I find it hard to feel sorry for people that took dumbass programs that a single google search would have told you would not have been lucrative and then went to a major university for it because they wanted to party.
There’s a part of me that’s glad college isn’t totally funded by tax dollars because then my money would be going towards Jimmy’s degree in photography that he’ll never use
1 Redactor0 2019-07-30
They must have improved their tactics since my time. Back then it was a 19-year old girl sent to our high school class who was clearly really nervous to even be speaking in front of high schoolers. She somehow managed to volunteer the information that she had accidentally shaved off one of her eyelashes once while trying to trim her unibrow. As soon as the kids started making fun of her I could immediately see that she'd given up.
That's an experience burned into my memory for all time.
1 elephantofdoom 2019-07-30
Cooking is one of those life skills that lacking usually means your parent's didn't give enough of a shit about you.
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1 Ingelri 2019-07-30
What do you mean nigga just mix some ingredients like follow the recipe
1 shitpersonality 2019-07-30
I kinda wish that too!
1 Metatron58 2019-07-30
There are decent cooking channels on youtube. Binging with Babish is good and he has a few videos on basics that are worth a watch.
There's no substitute for experience though so like someone else mentioned, taking on some part time work for a catering company is a good way to get a handle on it.
Biggest obstacle for people who don't know how to cook is fear. Fear of the kitchen, sharp objects, hot objects and how it's treated as a joke in media. I mean how many times on a TV show or movie have you watched a character somehow burn the food they were making for comedic effect?
Recipes are a blueprint for how to cook something. I've told people who are afraid of cooking a thousand times, just follow the damn recipe. It's not that hard. Yes, practice and experience matters but a good recipe you follow will generally net you acceptable results and you'll get practice at the same time.
1 MinerHornet 2019-07-30
Central Market offers weekend classes. I've taken a few. They are fun. https://centralmarket.com/cooking-school/