5'4"

it was over before it even began for this poor lad

Never began for you

Brutal.

Commenters acting like they aren‘t the bigger jesters...

Your best chance to sleep with a woman would be to transtion

wow

Unironically true.

Lmao at ThouShaltHearLight, what a chad.

Also honorable mention to the "I didnt know they stacked soy that high" comment.

The dude is definitely not going to be the type who smashed a lot during his single days. But, de-dorkify himself, learn a steady, good paying trade, start going to church and he can marry some landwhale who knows she's not going to do any better. Even as a short dude. It's a cliche that big fat redneck women end up with little stringy guys.

LOL. How do you assholes come across this shit? What’s the process??

I'm subbed to four or five "crazy" subs (i.e., r/femaledatingstrategy, r/gendercritical, r/breakingmom, r/witchesvspatriarchy, r/loveafterporn, r/gangstalking). Occasionally I'll see a post on my front page from one of those aforementioned subs that is so outlandish I have to crosspost it over on r/drama. If I'm feeling festive I'll go to one of those subs, sort by "controversial", pick the craziest story of the week, and voilà!

I’m banned from all five. I have no where to go :-(

Thank-you for your service

Honestly if I was him I would've necked by now so props to him for being so autistic he literally can't see what everybody else sees

I'd feel sorry for him but he had to say MAGA christian lmao. Imagine part of your identity is MAGA . Just say virgin loser bro.

This, but unironically.

Snapshots:

1. Absolute chad confused as to why no... - archive.org, archive.today

I am just a simple bot, *not** a moderator of this subreddit* | bot subreddit | contact the maintainers

Just use Christian Mingle bro.

If only I were 10 years younger 😩

Like any of us could have been worthy of this king's seed😞

Will you be my gf

Sure ♥️

Send pics of your feet

[deleted]

Do you have a vagina

into men

posting on r/drama

You know the answer to that question already.

I met my gf on drama she's great.

What's your secret?

Every gf i've had I've met online other than 1 I met at subway.

Honestly I kind of just say absurd shit and make fun of women and end up with girlfriends.

Looks like I'm on the right track.

tfw no late 1990s gf from your high school who you started talking to through AOL Instant Messenger anymore 😔

She cucked him with by having phone sex with a fucking brit of all things, lmfao.

She fucking cucked with a pedophile brit, you absolute loser.

Repeating fake news the 400th time doesn't make it any more relevant.

Go back to ordering panties from the vending machine your done here

Shut up incel

I am gay, and thus can't be an incel, fag.

Ew you like touching dicks with other men 🍆🥒🤢🤢🤮🤮

touching dicks instead of tonguing buttholes.

Even when given the answer to having fun, hets can't help themselves but find the literally worse possible activity.

Can we lick each other's buttholes

[deleted]

Send bussy so I can check.

I am not licking the asshole of a drama user I have some self respect

Fair

transformers, fast & furious, MAGA christian, gaming, memes

we have found the motherload

You forgot

5' 4

Short men are terrifying to me. What are they doing down there?

Tokyo Drifting

Scheming.

Hunting for berries, like the garden gnomes we are 🍓 🧝‍♂️

Transitioning.

Someone already said scheming.

Rubbing their hands together

[deleted]

I'm 5'2. Still wouldn't.

I mean, even without all the other cringey shit.

I'm 5'2.

So you're saying Masterlawlz has a chance?

No.

That's pretty brutal for a woman small enough that even Masterlawlz could kidnap.

Would you really put your money on Lawlz in a fight?

No, I imagine that if he could even get you into a car boot, he'd probably have a heart attack immediately after.

boot

speak american please

CALORIES.

thanks

okay but what about a total Chad 5'7" drama mod

theoretically

total Chad

5'7"

Pick one.

 

total Chad

drama mod

Ditto.

I feel like you're implying something but it's going over my head

Do we have sex now? Is that how this works?

shitpost world pride wide

Not enough stamps on your nice guy card to redeem yet.

Oh shit, how many doors do I need to hold open for you before I get laid?

hey im 62 wanna send piks

[removed]

Yeah he should work on his personality in therapy.

A reddit jannie calling someone unfuckable. That's a bold stance.

I’m a woman and I’m not fat.

Sounds like he should consider transitioning

I am honestly very surprised to find that this user doesn't post in r/shortcels

transformers, fast & furious, MAGA christian, gaming, memes

But why tho?

Autism and being a virgin who has never been on a date.

[deleted]

Muh "familia"

The Messiah

This has to be some based troll

Unfortunately for him it isn't. His post history goes on forever about his hobbies and lack of success.

Oh for fucks sake. How do these people always have 0 self awareness

What's he supposed to do? Grow 6 inches and completely change his entire personality? No way. Sure he won't get his dick wet anytime soon but when he finds the aspergirl magathot car show groupie of his dreams, you know they will be together for life

The Venn diagram of Car Show Thot and aspergirl that could date a manlet will never overlap

He needs to switch to weebshit or become a troid in order to attract a hammie.

Honest talk here - I stumbled across this thread by hitting random on the front page a bunch... and I'm struggling with the massive amount of in-group lingo. WTF is a "troid" or a "hammie"? Pretty sure I understand "aspergirl" and "manlet," but I could be wrong. Is there a glossary somewhere out there?

Look up your bussy for the answers to your questions

bussy

Wow, you all are fucking out there.

Are you gonna cry and piss your pants? Maybe shit and cum? Open up your bussy for everybody to move in

Sorry friendo, you're going to have to regress a little to keep up.

Troid is a derisive term for "transgender person", which is, in turn, derived from the dehumanizing incel-born term for a woman: "femoid" (female humanoid).

Hammie is short for "hamplanet", in this context denoting a "woman with a BMI of other 30".

So, to parse the sentence:

He (the poor inelegant fellow in the linked thread) should change his hobbies/preferences to anime and/or manga OR transition into a woman in order attract an overweight female partner.

The logic here is that his current passions (car shows, etc.) do not lend themselves to finding a woman who would accept his social ineptitude and short stature. Thus, by switching over to more socially maligned interests (as typified by Japanese cartoons and comics) or by even going so far as to actually become a woman (a ludicrous proposal, hardy har har), only then would he possibly be able to attract, at most, a heavier women with lower standards.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk. fag lmao

[removed]

“Troid” = trans woman, “hammie” = fat person, “aspergirl” = woman with high-functioning autism, “manlet” = male under 6’8”.

, “manlet” = male under 6’8”.

It never even began for ricecels 😭😭😭

Thank you.

Fuck off we're full

Don't worry. Not staying.

Awww.

That was the traditional greeting of his people. Don't be afraid, he bites only hands that feed him

What mick said

Car guys need to pursue their true female equivalents: horse girls. He should find a nice, mousy horsegirl, with thick ankles, the faintest blonde mustache, and a mildewy scrunchy in her ass length hair. Wife that bitch

Jealous tbh

with thick ankles

😩👌

Years of Irish dance

Oh the days of the Kerry dance, oh the ring of the piper's tune. Oh for one of those hours of gladness, gone at last, like our youth too soon

sip those were the days

Depends on the horse girl. Farm girl? Sure. A girl who does well in shows? Not so much. Bill Gates and Bruce Springsteen's daughters are both horse girls.

Neither. I’m talking about the kinda girl that doodles unicorns all through algebra class, and the teacher lets her do it out of pity even though she has a c in the class. I’m talking the kind of girl who wears Payless running shoes with her faded jeans and airbrush T shirt even though she walks the mile in gym. I’m talking the kind of girl who wears rimless glasses and nervously smiles when rarely called on in class, revealing braces full of bologna sandwich. I’m talking about the kind of girl I am going to marry

Oh yeah my sister actually rides and had one of them stalking her in high school. And congrats on the upcoming nuptials. She’s a lucky gal. 🤥

a nice, mousy horsegirl, with thick ankles, the faintest blonde mustache, and a mildewy scrunchy in her ass length hair.

Throw in a mid western accent and you pretty much described the ideal burgerwaifu

He needs to aim lower, the urban equivalent of the horse girl; the pit mommy.

Height isn't everything. I'm 5'5 but I slay mad piss all the time

based and watersportspilled

What's he supposed to do? Grow 6 inches and completely change his entire personality?

Yes.

You seem to be serious posting but short people get vagoo all the time. He just looks like a goblin on top of being short. Rule 1 is don’t be ugly.

What's he supposed to do?

• Haircut
• Muscle mass
• Clothing
• Better glasses
• Not being a political sperg (guess what, being a maga fag is just as unattractive as being an sjw)
• Interests that aren't consuming media (i.e. get some actual constructive hobbies like music, art, fkn crochet even)
• Just not coming across as a bitch in general

And then anywhere else I'd say being a christcuck is probably losing 90% of potential candidates but that's probably not as applicable in lolmerica

constructive hobbies
music, art

how are those constructive? unless ur really good (in which case u make money... meaning its a job) ur basically not doing anything

Wait, are you unironically doing a "if it doesn't make money it's worthless" meme or did I misunderstand

no but... if ur not really good no one else will want to listen to it... so its like ur just making/doing stuff for urself u know... so then.. hows it better than video games or other stuff... isnt it just wasting ur time?

I mean all human endeavours are ultimately a waste of time; but in the context of attracting a partner a creative hobby shows intellect and emotional intelligence, as well as an ability to get good at something

Basiccels will cope at this but it's been true since the dawn of time, artists and musicians get girls

Because it's a real skill that people give a shit about? Are you asking how musicians and artists get laid because if you don't understand that concept I'm not sure there's help available for you.

no he said those r constructive hobbies , which i think of as like... making stuff... u know what i mean ?

[removed]

Dude band chads are a real thing. Music dudes get laid a lot more than ICTcels even though they are broke as fuck.

i guess that is true actually. U are right they have value

The key thing he was missing was a meaningful father figure. I think a significant % of incels are just people who are trying to put their identity together with no guidance, and coming up with dumb fucking answers.

If he had a present father, he would tell him that profile made no sense. He'd make him go to speed dating or something else stupid that would at least force him to interact with real women.

To quote Brad "Chuck Plank" Pitt: 'We're a generation of men raised by women (who are men pretending to be women' PBUH.

What's he supposed to do?

exercise.

What's he supposed to do?

Not call people libtards and talk about how he loves transformers on his tinder profile for starters. That isnt a personality change, it's knowing when to show and tell.

Home schooled autism school shooter

Theirs no picking it’s all the same

whose alt is this

Kaiser's

*main

yet another gigavirgin reminding us why the internet is the biggest mistake in world history

This is the kind of king energy that will ensure the US will survive the simpification we have been suffering for the past decade.

This has got to be a joke right?

Never underestimate ledditors.

if this is for real the guy is absolutely tone deaf

This is who calls you a soyboy on the internet

Literally

Now I don't feel so bad for this kid anymore

Damn he's bloombergpilled.

I’m just now realizing that half the people arguing politics on this site are halfwits like this kid....

Yeah it makes me want to kill myself.

I’m actually feeling much better. I was scared people actually wanted to turn this country into USSR circa 1970.

Even if they do, mini mike will frisk them to keep us all safe. He's so based it makes me want to cry.

Not sure what "based" means, but dude cracked me up when he said he "bought" seats in Congress. For what it's worth, that was the funniest shit I've ever seen in American politics and that includes the Trump years.

I so wish stop and frisk didn't become such a big issue because it's one of those things that only New Yorkers (on both sides of the issue) can really understand. There was way more unity around it than people make it sound like. I don't know what you've heard, but the majority of black New Yorkers are law-abiding citizens that are pissed off about the crime on their streets, and S&F was an efficient way of stopping that crime.

I agree with all of that but this is a drama sub so I can't be serious.

Apologies, broke etiquette there. I'm not sure what's in bounds on this sub so i'll leave the shit talking to u

Ok now spread those cheeks I need to check for guns.

Nah, that was me. Sorry.

Aww man Gvegas is full of thots. Not gonna have better luck elsewhere I'm afraid. I feel bad for these dudes more than anything.

christian conservative

this is who calls you a beta cuck on the internet

It's a mudering spree for this poor boy. Hopefully all the advice and maybe a better education can save this lad.

save this lad.

...more like the other lads on his university campus.

It's cuz ugly

imagine falling for this bait

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he kind of looks like the ITS TAPE kid from the katana unboxing video

Yikes sweaty

My gut said its turbo-bait, but it seems too real. The quintessential redditor. I couldn’t help myself, I had to give advice. May Allah forgive me.

Absolutely based and lackofselfawareness-pilled to even post that here.

4) Lack of self awareness, yeah that’s true to an extent.

Well not anymore, now is it?

Its a ridiculous person/profile but theres no drama

I, like almost everyone else here, define "drama" as "anything that makes me feel better about myself", so I disagree

With low enough self esteem, anything can be drama!