I have a machete I keep under my bed for home defense. It's shaped like an old Roman gladius. Its blade is high carbon steel & it's EXTREMELY sharp. I could absolutely kill a man with it if he's not wearing armor.
Am I going to have to start carrying it around Dallas?
Holy shit I love larpers that get got with the reality of their hero fetish. Pro tip kiddies from an old pro: real life violence is nothing like the movies.
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I haven't found a screen shot for it yet but he was ranting about how Christians are so oppressed these days and how Catholics needed to form an army to serve the pope.
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70 comments
2 ComfyCoconut 2020-05-31
Where is snappy when you need em 😢
2 OniTan 2020-05-31
1 alphetaboss 2020-05-31
This is legit the funniest thing I've read. He charged a mob with a sword to protect his watering hole. Man's got lots balls and little brains.
1 bakedcheetossuck 2020-05-31
I can’t believe it wasn’t even his bar just a place he likes to go
1 ClementineChime 2020-05-31
He did it for free.
1 Sasanka_Of_Gauda 2020-05-31
TBH I can see him getting a lot of free drinks if the bar ended up safe once the 'rona is done. Or at least not having to pay the bar's cut.
1 ClementineChime 2020-05-31
That's true. Remember the bong who attacked the terrorist with a narwhal tusk.
1 DieShakeMilton 2020-05-31
Second ammendment-cels btfo once again. Looks like carrying a narwhal tusk around does the same job as carrying a piece😎
1 -Sulla-Felix- 2020-05-31
the funniest thing about the tusk dude is he isn't a bong, he's a polack who worked as a chef at that bar.
It makes sense upon reflection, no modern Englishman has the stones to charge at a terrorist, especially Londoners.
1 Damuel 2020-05-31
Considering the state of the rioters I'm sure they purposely have or are going to go burn down and raid the bar just out of spite.
1 dankius_memeius 2020-05-31
Yah but he might have to drink through a tube now.
1 GeminiRocket 2020-05-31
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EZW2-OEXQAESPqz?format=jpg&name=900x900
😂
1 ScunneredWhimsy 2020-05-31
This guy just went from the stupidest of fuck to someone I unironically respect. The plot-twist during these riots defy all expectation.
1 Can_The_SRDine 2020-05-31
Never come between a drunk and his watering hole
1 cipherdelic 2020-05-31
Slav genetics
1 Corporal-Hicks 2020-05-31
Really bad idea but props for standing up to the mob
1 Whaddaulookinat 2020-05-31
Lol
1 ClementineChime 2020-05-31
Tweet he made the day before:
Oh, my sweet summer child.
1 Whaddaulookinat 2020-05-31
Holy shit I love larpers that get got with the reality of their hero fetish. Pro tip kiddies from an old pro: real life violence is nothing like the movies.
1 TaysSecondGussy 2020-05-31
Couldn’t even foresight slash and tried his luck against tempered horde. No sympathy.
1 Whaddaulookinat 2020-05-31
Should've upped his blink ability 😅😅
1 Shitposting_Skeleton 2020-05-31
He got stunlocked lol, should've taken Steadfast jewels.
1 Sc00t_Sc00t 2020-05-31
Smh not glorious Nippon steel
1 omegalolpoggers 2020-05-31
Nippon steel wouldn't have let him down 😒
1 VanillaReign 2020-05-31
Gotta have those thousand folds man.
1 dwqy 2020-05-31
using a gladius means he's a badass gladiator upholding the lineage of the roman empire
1 RollUpMySpliff1 2020-05-31
What an absolute fucking clown, goddamn larpers man
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1 WeWuzKANG5 2020-05-31
Darwin has now taken over the timeline. There will be awards at the end of the year.
1 respaaaaaj 2020-05-31
Don't forget this one
https://twitter.com/HarrierMagnus/status/1083549729974378497
1 ItsSugar 2020-05-31
https://www.reddit.com/r/Drama/comments/grqqei/irl_version_of_the_simpsons_whitey_ford_on_the/fs0rtwy/
1 texanapocalypse33 2020-05-31
Can't see his tweets. Can someone copy paste?
1 Can_The_SRDine 2020-05-31
What did it say? The tweet couldn’t behave.
1 respaaaaaj 2020-05-31
I haven't found a screen shot for it yet but he was ranting about how Christians are so oppressed these days and how Catholics needed to form an army to serve the pope.
1 Sc00t_Sc00t 2020-05-31
Wait wtf he didn't even have financial stake in the place? He did it for free?
1 Maximum_Cuddles 2020-05-31
Mod this man! Completely based @utist, j@nnies need someone with high-t on their team.
1 Welcometony1234 2020-05-31
Ancaps are literally fucking insane.
1 BroughtToYouBySprite 2020-05-31
Simping for a bar? Lmfao
1 Sc00t_Sc00t 2020-05-31
This bar better be at least two steps up from a Bdubs
1 Can_The_SRDine 2020-05-31
He's a Tradcuck, alcohol is the only vice he's allowed.
1 Amour_cok 2020-05-31
Is he a Trad guy?
1 mohkohnsepicgun 2020-05-31
So a "machete shaped like a gladius". Is that like this one?
1 respaaaaaj 2020-05-31
Lol check out the twitter header for the magazine he writes for.
https://twitter.com/terrorhousemag
I'm now very very upset that this dude is still alive.
1 gilmore606 2020-05-31
what?! it says "TALES OF DWARF ABUSE" right there in plain text. wtf i love sword guy now
1 reptilia_remastered 2020-05-31
Bio:
1 Can_The_SRDine 2020-05-31
I agree with that part.
1 LawTalkingGuy06 2020-05-31
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1dnqKGuezo
1 okdaydreamer 2020-05-31
Why would someone want to be defined by "it"?
1 ItsSugar 2020-05-31
Self awareness
1 rakrakaon 2020-05-31
Didn't include the most disgusting part, it's an Aussie.
1 reptilia_remastered 2020-05-31
Why do Aussies and bongs care so much about US politics?
2 texanapocalypse33 2020-05-31
Because their countries are boring, and if they disagree with the govt, they go to gulag
1 2Manadeal2btw 2020-05-31
ours is very boring.
Most are apathetic about politics here.
1 pandeyji_ka_ladka 2020-05-31
Poor porter robinson
1 600_lbs_of_sin 2020-05-31
bruh
4 NervousTomatillo 2020-05-31
I'll take "failed legal defenses to a statutory rape charge" for $500.
2 600_lbs_of_sin 2020-05-31
"but your honor, i identify as a thousand-year-old dragon who is also a twelve-year-old schoolgirl"
2 dwqy 2020-05-31
just time dilate
1 [deleted] 2020-05-31
[removed]
1 Tzar-Romulo 2020-05-31
This is why M@yocide Exists. Reject m@yohood embrace Cagotism.
1 ason 2020-05-31
His bio says he's a commentator for Autistic Mercury. This was literal weaponized autism.
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1 ason 2020-05-31
His bio says he's a commentator for @utistic Mercury. This was literal weaponized @utism.
1 i_Chapo-d_my_pants 2020-05-31
i hope this was one of you
1 shhh_im_ban_evading 2020-05-31
If #PRM or #LandLordRights trended I would be so happy.
1 ItsSugar 2020-05-31
Imagine simping for a bar to the point you end up with brain damage.
1 Welcometony1234 2020-05-31
this is why we need haram.
1 Can_The_SRDine 2020-05-31
He's a tradcath, he already had brain damage.
1 DisoderlyaSsHoLe 2020-05-31
He has balls.
1 kermit_was_wrong 2020-05-31
Goddamn, he really did straight up ask for it, and got what was coming to him.
1 Supersamtheredditman 2020-05-31
I thought he was dead lmao