This Britney Spears thing is unironically super fucked up and makes me feel bad for her, I genuinely didn’t know it was possible to have your freedoms restricted this much legally.
Somewhere out there in Whocares, Texas, MasterLawlz persists in the sweltering heatwave, patiently obeying Greg Abbott's pleas to not use the AC for the sake of the poor overwhelmed monopoly electricity companies. He sits down snugly on his XXL chair made from sweat-stained, sticky vinyl "leather" that he got at a yard sale. After closing the shades of the sole tiny window in his $750/month apartment and putting Cartoon Network reruns on his $350 720p TV, he cracks open his work-provided Lenovo laptop ("multitasking"!) While deviously conceiving his next dull sticky tailored for the bespoke purpose of mildly annoying two dozen as-of-yet-unsuspended dramanauts + Zozbot, he reads a news article about Brittany Spears. And Lawlz thinks to himself:
I can understand why this could be allowed in some situations but you would need to be totally, absolutely batshit insane and a constant danger to yourself and others to justify this level of oversight. Even if there is more to the story, there’s no way the situation is bad enough to justify this.
The only reason Britney Spears is currently sitting in a mansion making TikToks and not pushing a shopping cart down the side of the road somewhere is because of her conservatorship.
That being said, I think a free Britney might be good for drama coin so #FreeBritney
35 comments
118 MasterLawlz 2021-07-01
This Britney Spears thing is unironically super fucked up and makes me feel bad for her, I genuinely didn’t know it was possible to have your freedoms restricted this much legally.
Also, she’s still super hot I gotta say.
93 JanetYellensFuckboy 2021-07-01
Somewhere out there in Whocares, Texas, MasterLawlz persists in the sweltering heatwave, patiently obeying Greg Abbott's pleas to not use the AC for the sake of the poor overwhelmed monopoly electricity companies. He sits down snugly on his XXL chair made from sweat-stained, sticky vinyl "leather" that he got at a yard sale. After closing the shades of the sole tiny window in his $750/month apartment and putting Cartoon Network reruns on his $350 720p TV, he cracks open his work-provided Lenovo laptop ("multitasking"!) While deviously conceiving his next dull sticky tailored for the bespoke purpose of mildly annoying two dozen as-of-yet-unsuspended dramanauts + Zozbot, he reads a news article about Brittany Spears. And Lawlz thinks to himself:
"Damn, I feel sorry for that girl's life."
95 MasterLawlz 2021-07-01
I like that in this scenario I’m still employed and living independently
56 jcvfcvujyhhtif 2021-07-01
Now this is sadposting
I'll commend you for this one
26 InnerBlackberry6 2021-07-01
LOL love ya king
38 tejanx 2021-07-01
> Whocares, Texas
> sole tiny window
> $750/month apartment
coastaloid detected
7 JanetYellensFuckboy 2021-07-01
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3 Elite_Club 2021-07-01
It never even began for urboids
13 GeauxHouston22 2021-07-01
Really really good post. I logged on from vacation to upvote this fyi
If doing so wasn't the g@yest thing imaginable, I'd give you a heckin reddit awardino
4 InnerBlackberry6 2021-07-01
You do realize your namesake is a lesbian correct?
18 JanetYellensFuckboy 2021-07-01
You do realize so is your mom but that didn't stop me
4 AlecOzzyHillPitas 2021-07-01
She’s married to another preeminent economist who I’m pretty sure is a bio-moid.
3 brinkworthspoon 2021-07-01
6/10 didn't mention the chair being covered in dried semen
19 AugustinesBitchBoy 2021-07-01
I assume there's gotta be something we don't know about Britney's situation. Like some sort of fucked up medical diagnosis.
34 MasterLawlz 2021-07-01
I can understand why this could be allowed in some situations but you would need to be totally, absolutely batshit insane and a constant danger to yourself and others to justify this level of oversight. Even if there is more to the story, there’s no way the situation is bad enough to justify this.
22 nybbas 2021-07-01
Right? And anyone THAT bad off, shouldn't be fucking doing shows in vegas. There is no justification for what's going on with her.
5 busslordlowkeybussin 2021-07-01
This is unrelated but imagine how many people around her are scheming.
17 g-throwaway-g 2021-07-01
The only reason Britney Spears is currently sitting in a mansion making TikToks and not pushing a shopping cart down the side of the road somewhere is because of her conservatorship.
That being said, I think a free Britney might be good for drama coin so #FreeBritney
14 MasterLawlz 2021-07-01
This will sound corny but there really is more to life than money though.
Is it worth being rich if you can’t do ANYTHING autonomously? What’s the point of having money if you aren’t free to use it
3 Additional_Bar_6512 2021-07-01
Bill Cosby would cool her off in a tub of Jell-O
-4 InnerBlackberry6 2021-07-01
Nah bro she got fat
15 MasterLawlz 2021-07-01
Lol no for someone that is nearly 40 she unironically looks great
She’s not quite as fit as she was at age 20 but I still think she’s really attractive
52 boxeir 2021-07-01
A testament to just how hard dudes rock
18 Additional_Bar_6512 2021-07-01
Rohypnol, Puddin Pops, and Oops!.... I did it again
Coming to MLK Drive near you in 2021
I'm not that innocent 😇
3 Lehk 2021-07-01
Quaaludes not roofies
7 Additional_Bar_6512 2021-07-01
There isn't Quaaludes in 2021
2 [deleted] 2021-07-01
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3 Additional_Bar_6512 2021-07-01
Ok, well at my imaginary MLK block party there's Rohypnol, Puddin Pops, and a Brittany Spears performance.
11 TheOverSeether 2021-07-01
#LeaveBrittanyAlone
The kym link is broken :(
9 goodbehaviorsam 2021-07-01
Mashallah.
9 Lysis10 2021-07-01
God damn patriarchy.
3 busslordlowkeybussin 2021-07-01
We've heard Tariq's take but what about Dr Umar's.
1 [deleted] 2021-07-01
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