For those who can't beat the paywall, some excerpts:

WASHINGTON (AP) - Former President Donald Trump has announced a shocking plan to defeat unemployment and improve the declining birth rate in one policy decision.

Critics of Trump's anti-immigration rhetoric have warned that without immigration, essential jobs will not be performed and the population will decline.

Trump has answered these critiques with a "revolutionary" new plan to fight both: decriminalizing, but highly regulating, r*pe.

Under the Trump administration, citizens will be allowed to buy "r*pe vouchers" for $5,000, which they may turn in to any police trying to prevent them from raping someone. Each r*pe requires a new voucher. Individuals impregnated in a r*pe in which a r*pe voucher was used are not permitted to terminate the pregnancy, nor are they entitled to any financial compensation from their male feminist.

Individuals who commit r*pe without a voucher are subject to normal criminal penalties.

Trump claims that the promise of r*pe will motivate "disillusioned young men" to re-enter the labor force. Quote: "We have the best young men in America here, don't we folks? Our young men can do more than the young men of any other country, and I don't say that lightly. My program will make it clear to our young men just how much we appreciate them."

Feminist groups have criticized Trump's rhetoric surrounding the program, saying that his failure to mention that women can r*pe and impregnate people too is "backwards."

I know this is true because Trump is my great-uncle, for the record.

this actually might be good, im kinda stoked

!khive

While other fake news organizations like the Washington Post and L.A. Times refuse to save democracy, we at the Babylon Bee are proud to do our part. Today, the esteemed Editorial Board of the Babylon Bee has officially voted to endorse Kamala Harris for President.

In 2020, the Babylon Bee famously endorsed "Dave" for President, discovering only later that Dave was a role played by actor Kevin Kline in a movie that hit the box office in 1993. This year, we resolved to endorse an actual person, and that person is Kamala Harris.

Why Kamala? Take a look at this incredible list of just a few of her achievements:

• As a young San Francisco lawyer, broke into politics by using her stunning intellect to win the favor of 60-year-old Mayor Willie Brown

• Ran for President in 2020 and earned zero votes, proving beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was in it purely for the love of the game

• After Joe Biden announced he would select a woman of color as VP, she was a woman of color

• When Mike Pence was trying to turn America to fascism, bravely intervened by saying, "I'm speaking."

• Was such a popular Vice President that over 12 million people hiked thousands of miles from South America to come meet her

• She is brat, which we believe means that she is as cool as a bratwurst

• So beloved that she became the first person in history to win a primary without receiving a single vote

Wow. How can you put into words the greatness that is Kamala Harris, other than to say that you have to witness its significance over the passage of time? We are just simple folks here at the Bee — but we know there is great significance to the passage of time.

We are grateful that when America is on the brink of losing its democracy and probably everyone becoming Nazis, the person standing strong against the forces of darkness is Kamala Harris. We at the Bee are proud to stand behind her. We will not be like the Washington Post, destined to be a byline in democracy's requiem, should the nation fall.

@Mummyvann still feel good about banning links to the Babylon Bee?

https://babylonbee.com/news/the-babylon-bee-editorial-board-officially-endorses-kamala-harris-for-president

I can't even CSS embed the link.

The Harris-Walz volunteer discord server just banned my account.

We expected this. That's why we quietly archived the server over the past week and are now releasing the files to the broader public.

Deadman's switch.https://t.co/0Sud1WxbqQ

— Reddit Lies (@reddit_lies) October 30, 2024

!nooticers

Given at least a quarter of UK adults have had an affair, it stands to reason that cheaters come in all shapes and sizes.

According to new research however, there are a number of features that unfaithful people share --- and middle-aged bald men are among the most likely to stray.

In a study by MrQ, Brits who've been cheated on were quizzed about their disloyal partner's looks, with cutting-edge AI technology then recreating what the 'typical' adulterer looks like.

Over a third of men admitted to cheating on a partner at least once before compared to 24% of women, which tallies with divorce statistics showing women are 33% more likely to file for divorce due to adultery than men are.

People aged 45 to 54 play away most, with more than one in three in this age group having done so, while autumn is peak time for infidelity, going up 22% as the weather gets cooler.

As for the stereotypical male cheater, findings put him in his 40s, with blue-grey eyes, small lips, short facial and neck hair and little to no head hair. Topping off the look is a larger nose and visible frown lines.

In contrast, the stereotypical woman who cheats is said to be dark-haired and in her early 50s, with a small nose and a medium-sized pout.

And across the board, those who did the dirty were described as sporting a slim build and having 'staring eyes'.

Researchers highlight that these images are based on statistical analysis and 'won't apply to all individuals,' as 'people's behaviour is defined by their decisions and actions, not what they look like.'

Loyalty is an important factor for Brits though, as two-fifths of respondents who'd been betrayed split up with their partner straight away after finding out (although an astonishing one in 50 people went on to marry them anyway).

As well as physical traits, there are also trends revealing the locations where cheating is rife.

Manchester emerged as the affair capital of the UK, with 43% of Mancunians having had at least one, followed by Sheffield at 39% and Cardiff at 34%.

Meanwhile, Edinburgh is home to the most faithful residents, with more than half (55%) claiming to have never cheated on any of their partners or been cheated on themselves.

And if you're planning on two-timing someone from Bristol or Glasgow, you shouldn't expect your relationships to last if caught, as these cities have the least tolerance for unfaithful lovers.

The survey found that 64% of Bristolians and 60% of Glaswegians dumped their partner as soon as they found out, which correlates with lower rates of cheating in both.

The UK's affair capitals (% of residents who admitted to cheating)

1. Manchester (43%)

2. Sheffield (39%)

3. Cardiff (34%)

4. Leeds (32%)

5. Norwich (30%)

The UK's most faithful cities (% of residents who have never cheated or been cheated on)

• Edinburgh (55%)

• Nottingham (48%)

• Liverpool (44%)

• Birmingham (44%)

• Newcastle (42%)

She found this post, and I am now single

She said it was an attempt to embarrass her more. It wasn't, but telling her otherwise made her scream

From now on, I am only going to date psychologically mature women who can take feedback. Feel free to follow and DM me if that's you

— Coach Bruce (@OX_DAO) October 31, 2024

!chuds !trump2024

https://old.reddit.com/r/JoeRogan/comments/1ggk14k/joe_rogan_experience_2221_jd_vance/

>I'm soooo tired of men on dating apps hitting me up on some weird shit. I'm tired of men calling me a BBW. I'm tired of men telling me that they've always wanted to hookup with a fat girl. I'm tired of men telling me that they only like big girls. I'm tired of those same men throwing my weight in my face or making me feel uncomfortable with the amount that they talk about me being fat. I'm tired of being called nicknames like big mama and fluffy marshmallow (yes, you read that correctly. wtf), and so on.

>I'm so tired and annoyed and I just wanted to be treated like a normal human being.

!foidmoment

This was Zuly during her Bad Girls Club season:

This is Zuly now:

We know she got a micropeepee, but you're not supposed to say these things. Unlessssssss the is a Trumper.

She's not really a if she votes for trump

oh dear this is heresy.

What a confused individual.

hmmm confused about what?

Chosen name is a giveaway

Making fun of their chosen name?

she's a sexual predator

She was a lesbian hooking up with women, but now she's a male feminist. ok

It must be a kink

This is the new Reddit excuse for people not getting mad at what they get mad at.

Deadnaming

oh noes deadnaming!

God dammit they jannied the one calling her a little peepee butthole lol

MAGA is big mad that Mark Cuban told the ladies on The View this about Donald Trump:

“You never see him around strong, intelligent women. Ever.”

🍿 pic.twitter.com/6BRQi6m1Vd

— Art Candee 🍿🥤 (@ArtCandee) October 31, 2024

!nonchuds !khive Where's the lie?

https://steamdb.info/app/1845910/

All is lost...

Was anybody here into the olddragon age games? Something I didn't think about until now was that everyone I knew who were really into inquisition were either college commies or full blown shitlibs. I wonder if they knew what they were doing and were actually pandering to their base with all the stuff.

In either case, I think we all owe Biomoidware a few barves.

Trying to pronounce his name would get me in trouble with the tongue rights groups, so I will not do it.

Here's the white woman warning people about him:

Advice: Do not trust, work with, or work for Oghenechovwe Donald Ekpeki. He is a con artist. He lies about who he knows and how well he knows them. He blames his mistakes on others and when he gets caught doing something unethical, he plays the victim.

Apparently, he was already known for being a dramatard in the community:

Not to mention the hussling people for funds....

Indeed. The man who once proudly proclaimed he would never get a job has certainly enjoyed the fruits of other people's labor with his many GoFundMe campaigns.

Not gonna lie, proclaiming that you would never get a job is pretty based.

I've long suspected he was a conman after he managed to use attending an event to spend 6 months living here for free. The many, many GoFundMe campaigns raising thousands of dollars for him to attend conventions and pay for his visa and so on were also red flags. Thank you, Erin.

This guy sounds more and more based by the minute.

And here's some person who's most certainly not obsessed trying to pull Fatrick into the conversation :

Same goes for Patrick S. Tomlinson who has vehemently defended Ekpeki's behaviour in the past... especially when it comes to bullying women. Tomlinson is another toxic butthole no one in the industry should deal with (hence why he's getting banned from all the cons)

TBH, dunking on Fatrick is always justified and, generally, a positive thing to do.

Thanks to @CopyrightOffice, McDonald’s franchisees now have the right to repair their own ice cream machines.

In March @FTC filed a comment in support of this change, and we’ll keep using our tools to protect people’s right to repair. https://t.co/vzLV15dUEk https://t.co/r13FaYHoIp

— Lina Khan (@linakhanFTC) October 30, 2024

Oda’s Special Q&A – The 9th Question WOW pic.twitter.com/EEhuL3YnpJ

— Pew (@pewpiece) October 31, 2024

Mysterious event revealed, now everyone wants it to be a movie lul

!deathtomicks

A few years ago, I discovered this video from the youtuber Bald and Bankrupt: Inside the Belarus Chernobyl Zone. The combination of unusual destination and the fact that the youtuber was fluent in Russian was enough to pique my interest, and so I followed his content for a few months. At that time, he was pretty much exclusively posting content from Russia and the former Soviet Union.

One day, however, I found out something very interesting...turns out Bald and Bankrupt is a bit of a lolcow (no kiwi thread sadly ) There is a whole subreddit,https://old.reddit.com/r/BaldAndBaldrDossier, dedicated to this guy (and apparently some less famous travel vloggers in his orbit) and they have a compilation of links in a pinned post accusing him of being a s*x tourist and a PUA, in a kiwiesque writeup

Is Bald & Bankrupt really a s*x tourist and a prolific pick up artist?

At this point, I was intrigued , the videos I had seen didn't seem to point that way, and I wondered if redditors were just jealous someone else was having s*x I have copied the text here below, but I will sum it up, for your convenience.

TL;DR Bald was a user on the rooshvforums, a PUA forum, which appears to be active to this day under a new URL https://rooshvforum.network/, under the username Vorkuta Here's a link establishing the connection and here's another forum user making the same conclusion:

He apparently used a variety of aliases, including Arthur Chichester (Wikipedia lists it as his publishing pseudonym) and The Ligurian. There are apparent similarities between a book by Chichester and the stories told on the forums by the Ligurian, outlined here Most notably, a story about paying a Belorussian girl for s*x after picking her up for as a hitchhiker! https://archive.fo/huHUZ Hopefully it was just coomer fantasy

A woman in her twenties sat at a cracked concrete bus stop that had services to God knows where. She was wearing shorts and a t shirt which exposed tanned shoulders and legs. I stopped the car and wound down the window.
"Where you going?" I asked. She said a name, I nodded pretending to know it motioned for her to get in, she climbed in the back door. We set off further along the road through the forest past blue fenced graveyards and grey concrete memorials. "So what do you do" I asked after a few minutes of silence, genuinely interested as to how a young woman could survive in this bleakness. She was working for the local government farm in some capacity I didn't understand. Could have been the manager or an udder puller. She smelt of damp grass. It wasn't unpleasant. She was friendly and interested in my journey. I felt the first stirring, I wanted to stick my peepee in her mouth. "How much do you make a month?" I enquired. The reply was pitiful, about what we spend on a decent night out. There was no point number closing or inviting this chick for a coffee, I would never see her ever again. I suppressed what I wanted to say. We drove on chatting about life but with the sun beginning to set and a young tanned woman in my car my latent exploitative nature surfaced, "Would you like to earn some money?" I asked making eye contact with her in my rear view mirror, the question asked before it had been fully rationalised. There was no reply. "We could find a quiet place and rest together for an hour" I continued. Silence. I drove on over the cracked road, the radio the only sound between us, myself feeling a mixture of disgust at my own seediness and excitement for asking and what possibilities hung in the air. We drove past a long lake surrounded by tall green grass with more radiation signs. I imagined fricking her in it. "How much" she asked eventually with a steady voice. I offered her what local currency I had in my wallet, a 100,000 Rouble note ( $6 ). Silence. I drove on avoiding potholes and eye contact. Eventually she spoke, "turn down here". And so I headed down a sandy track past the radiation warning signs towards the lake, and after a short time emptied a fortnight of frustration into her mouth and onto the irradiated ground.

However, that's just ONE time he's been accused of being a sexual predator! Ever wonder why he's "bankrupt" in the first place? He was accused of r*pe on the Isle of Wight (Benjamin Swift-Rich or Benjamin Rich is his real name btw, also on Wikipedia). I should note, however, that he was cleared of criminal wrongdoing here.

After this event, he went abroad to start being a professional sexpat

There are an absolute shitton of links in that post and in the linked posts on that post that have even more accusations, but those two are the big ones. I also remember posts of him talking about how slavic women are his personal fetish and that basically he learned Russian to frick them. However, I'm unable to find the links to those posts Honestly, I do have to respect learning another language just to frick, it's really going above and beyond.

Instead, Here's an archived post where he does an analysis on where to coom in Russia based on poverty level and demographics, where he does mention places with a lot of slavs as being more desirable.

Now, what happens when a man like that is BANNED from his dream country?

That's right our man Bald was actually banned from Russia, during a West-to-East tour for his channel no less! He was arrested breaking into a spaceport Article

Later, he was banned from the country. Bald says it was for supporting Ukraine in the recently escalated war, but maybe the arrest also had something to do with it

Video discussing the ban:

Since that video, he's been forced to diversify his channel, going to south america, other Eastern Euro countries, Africa and the most horrible country of all: the UK He also recently went back to India, where some of his earliest videos were posted from. (He made a troll video once talking about things he hated about India )

The more recent video, I Visited India So You Don't Have To, caused a shitstorm of blowback against him by Indians. Indeed, if you check the https://old.reddit.com/r/BaldAndBaldrDossier/ front page, the recent posts are full of Indians seething at him

The funny thing is, all this controversy doesn't seem to have affected him at all, he still gets millions of views on his videos and seems to have plenty of fans so he still has lots of money to frick third worlders with!

TL;DR

-Bald Bankrupt has a history of being a sexpat and has some, uh, controversial s*x stories in his closet

-He was banned from his prime hunting grounds for slavic beauties either for breaking and entering or saying Slava Ukraini

-Even after all of this, the haters can't stop him from sexpatting around the world and making tons of cash

@BWC discuss foreigners coming into Russia to frick their women

@ACK-A discuss a fellow coomer being unjustly hated on by redditors

For the record Im a #proud squeaker and I have a mask so I can sound and look like a child, so passing wont be a problem. Was just wondering if the dignity think is worth it

TLDR: They have a cap of 3,000 medical students per year. Of course letting immigrants in to do anything but the dirtiest jobs is unthinkable. So with an aging population (especially in poorly-served rural areas) the number of doctors is kept artificially low to reduce competition. That's pretty insane to begin with, but it gets worse. Somehow there's a quota for the number of total medical students but no quotas for how many have to go into different fields, so most of them choose to become dermatologists. It turns out that in a skin-obsessed culture you can make a lot more money that way than by delivering babies in some village out in the mountains. (Also some of the "dermatology" clinics are just places where rich people go to get shot up with propofol. They're literally just drug dealers.)

So President Yun Seok-Yul tried to increase the quota to 5,000/year. The doctors went apeshit and went on strike. That was back in February and they still are refusing to back down. The public is starting to realize that doctors are a cabal who've got a monopoly on health care and intend to squeeze the most possible cash out of it. The doctors are also pissed now that nurses are being allowed to take over some duties that used to be theirs. Well maybe show up and do the work if you don't want someone else to?

It's a good thing doctors in other countries aren't exactly the same...

Top Drama

Relative Drama (takes into account the size of the subreddit)

autodrama: returning jobs to dramneurodivergents. Ping HeyMoon if there are any problems or you have a suggestion