I have a vampire/vore (blood) kink which my partner happily acts out on me. I would like to take things to the next level by adding mild to moderate pain when they pretend to bite my neck.

Dear How to Do It,

I have a vampire/vore (blood) kink which my partner happily acts out on me. I would like to take things to the next level by adding mild to moderate pain when they pretend to bite my neck. I know from YouTube and similar sites that prosthetic fangs are available but I assume that realistic (pointy) ones will run the risk of causing an actual puncture injury (my dentist tells me at every visit that the jaw is the strongest muscle in the human body).

I think short, non-pointy "nubs" made of plastic or rubber would work for the task. Are there commercially available ones as far as you know? My partner has three spare identical low-profile orthodontic retainers so I've contemplated going the DIY route on one of them to see if I could achieve my "inner Etsy."

But is there an alternate way to do this that I've not considered? Or is there no safe way to do this that won't risk getting me featured in an episode of

"S*x Sent Me to the ER"?

—Have a Drink of Me

Dear Have a Drink of Me,

There are definitely rubber vampire fangs out there—a quick internet search will get you what you're looking for. But Father Sebastiaan, a fangsmith once dubbed by the New York Times magazine as "the Vampire King of New York," has a message for you: Don't use fangs for biting.

Granted, the custom fangs that Father Sebastiaan makes are "medical-grade quality," and formed out of dental acrylic. These days, they're mainly 3D printed. He's been making fangs for 30 years (his first pair was a Christmas present for his mother)—and his grandfather was a dentist, as is his aunt. "The fangs I make are good for nibbling, kissing, and blowjobs," Father Sebastiaan told me via Zoom. Blowjobs? How does that work, I wondered. "Very carefully," he responded.

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"I think that the fangs and the saliva are a dangerous mix for infection. You've got to nibble," said the man who has been active in the vampire subculture since 1992. He said he's (accidentally) broken skin when kissing with fangs in. And so, through his years of experience in the community, Father Sebastiaan has come to conclude that, "using things to bite people, I think that's dangerous. You can break the skin, you could break an artery. You can bruise someone. You can hurt someone really bad."

To be as safe as possible here, I'm going to recommend that you keep things at a nibble, regardless of the material you're using. "As the most famous fangsmith in the world, I've seen it all," he continued. "I've been making fangs for 30 years. I know all the different techniques to make fangs. And I will tell you that it is stupid to drink blood with fangs. It's irresponsible. It's not funny."

Incidentally, Father Sebastiaan has tasted blood before. "It tastes like iron," he reports. He did not do this with fangs, but with a lancet, like the type that's used for diabetic blood tests. "When I did it, I just used the lancet and put a couple holes in the person's back, above the shoulder blade. Never in the neck!"