You've identified that you're a PickMe. Congrats, one of the first steps towards being a goddess is knowing that you are part of the equation of your cyclical misery. For those in the back, I said PART OF. You can't fully blame yourself, that's still practicing these feeble behaviors. Yes, we're here to take responsibility for our current mindset leading us to where we are right now. However, realize that you have been surrounded by men who exhibit microaggression towards women, you have been brainwashed by other PickMe's. But now you know the truth: You are worth SO much more than anyone ever said you were. YOU determine where you go from here. Being a woman, you have been through so much. Think about the men who try to control our bodies, who use us to fulfill their sick fantasies, the statistics on violence. The media celebrates this and fuels this grotesque reality that we are meant to be meek, feeble and to endure abuse.

1. Promise to yourself "never again". Never again will you be manipulated or abused. Never again will you quietly endure your discomfort.

2. Realize that AMALT (All Men Are Like That). Thinking "Not all men" is DETRIMENTAL to your safety. "Not all men are male feminists". Fine. But if I gave you a pack of gummy bears and told you one was poisoned, wouldn't you treat each of them as potentially lethal? Let them prove to you that they are "not like the other men". Do not prove to HIM that you are "not like the other girls". One of men's biggest worry is to get "divorce r*ped" but are they ever worried about ACTUAL R*PE? NO. So don't give them the benefit of the doubt, make them show you through ACTIONS. A HVM will have no problem with this. A scrote will act offended and immature and just not worth your time, this is because he doesn't respect you. Which brings me to...

3. Define your standards and warning flags. You need to write this down. 5 is a good number to start with Comment this below if you must, I want you to be CRYSTAL clear on what you will NEVER tolerate ever again and what you will NEVER tolerate ever. For example, I will never be with a man who cheats on me. I will consider repeated arguments a huge warning flag. If I need to repeat myself more than twice about something that is clearly important to me... boy BYE. (If you choose to comment, it also helps other women identify red flags and help them define their standards as well.

4. BLOCK THAT SCROTE/ EX/ STALKER. Stop being nice to him. He sucks and has zero value to you. You know he just wants to sleep with you. Block him now. You will feel so cleansed. If they try to reach out again, say that you have been really busy and focusing on yourself. They may call you a b-word for "leading them on". You can tell them to go to heck. You don't owe no one an explanation.

5. Read the sidebar. Take your time with it, it's a lot to take in. But it will equip you in the long run and there's plenty of good stuff.

6. Take care of yourself, starting today, starting now. Say no to something you don't want to do. Don't pick him up, don't make him a sandwich if he doesn't deserve it. Begin breaking out of your PickMe routine. Don't adapt to his needs now because it will be "worth it in the end". Honey, it's not worth it. You deserve to be happy NOW. Another way you can practice this is to take care of your hygiene and your environment. Be proud of your appearance and your surroundings because you did it for YOUR well-being. Most PickMeishas are externally motivated, they just HAVE to get that "good job" sticker. Nothing wrong with being externally motivated, but pining for a man's approval is just pathetic. Do it to make FDS proud, do it for YOU. (this will take time, I'll make another post on it someday but try your best! We're rooting for you!)

7. Realize that there are high-level women out there who will support you. Maybe even on here. We're all just trying to look out for each other, but no one can help anyone that doesn't WANT to realize their own self-destructive behavior. So if you think your situation "isn't so bad". Sorry, this wasn't the post for you.

I will try to update with more suggestions as I get them.

@Neon_Needles @TED_SIMP

!goyslopenjoyers this one's for you.

Take notes ladies, this is how you land a high value man.

!coomers !cuteandvalid !cuteandinvalid !titsorgtfo !thotpatrol !thotpatrollers

foids are !r-slurs

>buh its not fair!!

https://old.reddit.com/r/unitedkingdom/comments/1fhywmj/young_british_men_are_neetsnot_in_employment/

this is why men deserve less!

Shanghai – During her final years of high school, Chinese teenager Xu Yunting found an unusual way to make some pocket money — transforming herself into male video game characters and taking their female devotees on dates.

The trend, called "cos commissioning," has gained traction in China recently, with social media posts garnering millions of views as an increasing number of young women use their purchasing power to engineer a meeting with their dream man in real life.

One early morning in Shanghai last month, Xu carefully inserted contacts to enlarge her irises and adjusted a tangerine wig to transform into Jesse, a character from the romance quest mobile game Light and Night.

During her final years of high school, Xu found an unusual way to make some pocket money: transforming herself into male video game characters and taking their female devotees on dates.

A tall and sensitive musician, he is one of five characters that woo players throughout the game — and for client Feng Xinyu, a vivacious 19-year-old, the ideal partner.

"I don't have a boyfriend because I'm not interested in 3D men," Feng says, using a term for real-life men as opposed to those on the page or screen. "I like anime characters a little bit more. They're more appealing to me."

Light and Night, made by tech giant Tencent and aimed squarely at young women, promises a "brand-new interactive experience of highly immersive love." Players like Feng, who form strong emotional connections with characters in such games, are known as "dream girls" — and cos commissioning takes the immersion to the next level by dragging those 2D beaus off the screen and into the real world.

The Shanghai office of Chinese tech giant Tencent

Feng has commissioned Xu twice before for a fee of around $70 (about ¥9,900). Last month, she spent $2,800 (about ¥400,000) on a multi-day trip with another Jesse cosplayer to a different province.

But she decided she preferred Xu's portrayal and hired her for a third date. "We really click," Feng says. "She's just like the character from the game. It feels like we were meant to be together."

'Reconstructing gender rules'

Feng was waiting for Xu at a metro station and grinned in unabashed delight when she spotted her. The two appeared relaxed, holding hands and chatting happily as they headed to their first activity.

Their date — all planned and paid for entirely by Feng — lasted all day, beginning with tea and ending with a hot pot meal and a romantic stroll. At both a doll-painting workshop and cake-decorating class they attended, they were one of many cos commission pairs. Staff at the latter business say they have noticed more and more couples coming in over the past year — sometimes dozens on busy days.

Cosplayer Xu Yunting (right) waits at a metro station before a 'cos commissioning' date in Shanghai.

Part of the appeal, experts studying the phenomenon say, is that it gives young women a way to perform an idealized heteronormative relationship. Conservative social attitudes towards women remain widespread in China, often reinforced by state media and popular culture.

Aside from assuaging safety concerns, hiring a female cosplayer ensures a level of equality and understanding not necessarily guaranteed in a real-life relationship.

"I don't think it's important what gender the person being commissioned is," Fudan University's Tian Qian says. "What is important is that (the cosplayer) is a vessel because the client needs a vehicle for their emotions."

Xu Yunting (left) and Feng Xinyu are seen at a metro station during their 'cos commissioning' date in Shanghai.

Another academic, Zhou Zixing, wrote that cos commissioning allows women "to gain a voice that is fully respected by the opposite s*x ... responding to, breaking and reconstructing the gender rules of the real world."

'Low-quality guys'

At the cake-decorating class, Feng leaned over the table, fondly watching Xu pipe generous amounts of icing onto a sponge cake. Afterwards, Xu gently helped Feng remove her apron, modeling Jesse's gentlemanly behaviour.

"The guys in the games are all quality guys," says Xu. "I think (clients) will be able to improve their requirements in real life in terms of what they want from a man so that they don't settle for low-quality guys."

Her mother Fang Xiuqing admitted her initial reaction when she learned what Xu was doing was: "How could this happen to my daughter?" But she has since come around to the idea.

"I don't think it's a profession — it's a hobby," says Fang. "She gets enjoyment from it, and she also brings joy to others."

Fudan University's Tian says cos commissions can act as "emotional sustenance." "Although this is a paid interaction, it still gives a sense of being seen, which has a certain healing effect to it."

!asians !weebs

This is something I deliberately don't tell ppl publicly. I've left enough clues to figure out that booking me functions as a test of compatibility in itself https://t.co/bfcC2aAikv

— Aella (@Aella_Girl) September 14, 2024

She picked a real winner with this one

Sexpats are expatriates who move to foreign countries primarily for sexual tourism or to engage in romantic relationships with local residents. They are often drawn to the perceived exoticism, lower sexual consent age, and less stringent laws in their destination countries. Sexpats typically focus on countries in Southeast Asia, Latin America, and Eastern Europe, where they believe they can find more permissive societies and more accessible partners.

Passport Bros, on the other hand, are a group of individuals who seek to acquire multiple passports and citizenships to enhance their global mobility, freedom, and financial opportunities. They are often digital nomads, entrepreneurs, or investors who take advantage of various citizenship by investment programs, residency by investment schemes, or ancestry-based citizenship options. Passport Bros are motivated by the desire to optimize their tax obligations, access better business opportunities, and enjoy a higher quality of life in various countries around the world.

Passport Bros may be interested in moving to a country where their values align with that of the society, including attitudes towards gender roles and women's behavior.

!moidmoment

She did the Helen keller and talked with her hips. With another man.

Dear Prudence,

I am a straight man in a marriage with a wonderful woman whom I love dearly. I would never dream of being unfaithful, either physically or emotionally. However, she has discovered my secret.

I sometimes write gay erotica anonymously on the internet. It is complete fiction and just something I do for fun and to blow off steam, and because for some reason I find it very fascinating (my stories are really focused more on the cerebral/power balance dynamic and less on the physical acts). My wife is extremely hurt and convinced that I am writing about actual experiences I have had or am currently having. I feel awful that she is believing the worst, and I don't know how to make her understand. What should I do?

—Speed Kills

Dear Speed Kills,

You have to start by explaining why you kept this hobby a secret. I mean, really think about it, maybe even write down some notes for yourself over a period of days and weeks, and bring her a full and thoughtful explanation. Whatever you express needs to be more compelling than her assumption, which is "Because it's an expression of a secret life." And it sounds like you can come up with a meaningful narrative about how you got here, while being totally honest. I'm sure there may be many factors contributing to your choice to keep your writing private. Perhaps these include things like your keen awareness of society's homophobia, a history of being made fun or criticized for interests or behaviors that fall outside the norm, a deep fear of being rejected or misunderstood, the thrill of having a secret, a preference for avoiding hard conversations, or maybe even some of your own (unnecessary, but real) shame and embarrassment. Perhaps you're generally conflict-avoidant. And if you simply were being a bit lazy by avoiding a conversation that you knew would take a lot out of you, own that, too!

Whatever you say, the more reflective and detailed and raw you can be, the better. It will also help to reassure her that her concerns aren't unreasonable or invalid, and that if you stumbled upon her secret body of work about something that sounded like it could be her fantasy life, you'd have concerns too! Acknowledge that it is unusual to keep an entire hobby from a spouse, and be clear that, while the writing itself was not wrong or bad, you did set yourself up for this scrutiny. Ask her what she might need to rebuild trust. If she can't come up with anything, offer couples counseling and a lot of patience, and the willingness to answer all of her questions multiple times as she continues to process everything.

IMPD: Uber driver admits to raping, killing Indy woman before dumping her body

INDIANAPOLIS — Police say an Uber driver recently arrested in the death of Chanti Dixon admitted he r*ped, shot and killed the woman after picking her up from work Sunday morning.

Francisco Valadez, 29, was arrested Tuesday morning by IMPD homicide detectives and preliminarily charged with murder.

Valadez reportedly admitted to police that he shot and killed the 30-year-old Dixon in a fit of rage after picking her up as an Uber driver and attempting to r*pe her in the back of his car. He then said he dumped her body in an alleyway in a wooded area near the victim's home.

"This is just disgusting all around and it did not have to happen," said IMPD chief Chris Bailey.

Court documents filed Tuesday in Marion County Court detail how officers were called around 1 p.m. Monday to the 1800 block of Wagner Lane after a woman's body was found in a nearby wooded area. IMPD arrived to find a woman naked, unresponsive and lying on her stomach.

The victim's family said they tracked her phone to the woods behind her home where they found her body and called police.

The woman – later identified by the Marion County Coroner's Office as Dixon – was pronounced dead on scene. After the crime scene was processed for evidence, it was discovered that Dixon had suffered a gunshot wound to the left side of her head.

Chanti Dixon/Photo provided by family

A woman near the scene told police that the dead woman was her daughter who had been missing since early Sunday morning. The woman told officers her daughter had gotten off work around 3:30 a.m. and ordered an Uber to get home. No one had talked to her since.

IMPD crews reportedly found two cell phones in the wooded area near Dixon's body. Both phones were identified as belonging to Dixon. The victim's mother gave police the passcodes for both phones, which would eventually lead them to Valadez.

Investigation into Valadez

Once back at the homicide office, detectives found that Dixon had ordered an Uber at 3:34 a.m. from the 2300 block of W. 16th Street. She reportedly made one stop along Washington Street in the Uber before being taken in the same car to her home address on Earhart Street.

According to data stored in the Uber app, Dixon's driver drove a BMW with an Indiana license plate. Detectives searched further into the driver and identified him as Valadez, coming up with an address on Aristocrat Circle.

Detectives then went to Valadez's home and began questioning him about Dixon. He told police that he did pick up Dixon on Sunday but then began to tell a story of how an armed Black man came up to his car and tried to rob Dixon.

"[Valadez] added that the suspect shot [Dixon] in the thigh and that she kicked herself out of his car and he fled the scene," police wrote. "He also said that he had cleaned the blood out of his car."

Police also reportedly spoke with Valadez's mother, who told them that her son owned a gun that he regularly carries. She added that he had recently cleaned out his car and that the items were still inside. After seizing the items for evidence, police took Valadez in for interrogation.

Admission and arrest

Detectives took Valadez to the IMPD homicide office where he was reportedly read his Miranda Rights and signed a waiver agreeing to speak with police.

After telling several stories about what happened to Dixon, Valadez reportedly admitted what actually happened.

"Mr. Valadez told two different stories as to what happened with Ms. Dixon," police wrote.

Detectives said Valadez admitted to raping the woman in the back of his car. While raping the woman, Valadez said she insulted his body. This reportedly caused him to become enraged and shoot Dixon in the head.

Valadez told police that after the shooting, he drug Dixon out of his car and placed her lifeless body behind a concrete barrier at the dead end of Wagner Lane. The Uber driver also admitted to trying to have s*x with Dixon's dead body, police said.

The dead end of Wagner Lane where Dixon was found (via IMPD)

Valadez was then taken into custody by IMPD and later booked into the Marion County Jail on a felony murder charge. IMPD officials said Tuesday that more charges can be expected in the case. An initial court hearing has not yet been scheduled in his case.

'Disgusting, disturbing': IMPD reaction

Indianapolis police officials held a news conference Tuesday afternoon discussing Dixon's murder and the arrest of Valadez.

"This is disgusting, it's disturbing," IMPD Chief Chris Bailey said during the conference. "No one deserves to be treated this way in our community and I am so sorry to her family that we're here today."

Bailey then touched on the effect this has on the victim's family.

"This is a family that's been ripped apart," he said. "This woman is gone from the world unnecessarily by an evil act, and I'm glad that we were able to find this individual as quickly as we did so that he didn't have an opportunity to perpetuate violence further in our community."

IMPD's social media accounts posted a photo of a gun seized in relation to the case, shown below.

Gun seized in Dixon murder case (via IMPD)

Bailey indicated that more charges were forthcoming in the case and stressed that the Marion County Prosecutor's Office would make the final charging decision.

"Women, girls, mothers…they have a right to exist freely in our community without fear of something heinous happening to them," said IMPD Assistant Chief Catherine Cummings. "They have a right to walk, bike, order a rideshare without fearing something bad will happen to them."

While they insist the murder is an isolated incident, IMPD said ride-share users can always share their location with friends and family and that women should trust their instincts if things feel dangerous.

"Rideshares continue to be an excellent and safe option to use when you're out in our community," said Cummings. "This is a family's worst nightmare. We're disgusted by these allegations."

Bailey said IMPD wants to know if Indy residents have had other suspicious interactions with Valadez as a rideshare driver or in any other capacity. He urged people to contact the IMPD Homicide Office at (317) 327-3475. To remain anonymous, call Crime Stoppers at (317) 262-TIPS.

In a statement sent to FOX59/CBS4 on Tuesday, an Uber spokesperson confirmed that Valadez has been banned as a driver from the Uber platform.

"Our hearts break for Ms. Dixon's family and loved ones in the midst of this tragedy," Uber said. "The details of this act of violence are atrocious and we will assist Indianapolis police however we can as they continue to investigate."

Uber went on to say that the company is deeply committed to safety and has invested heavily in making its platform safer for customers. These safety measures include hiring teams of law enforcement pros around the globe and adding an emergency button for in-app users, Uber said.

In addition to adding the emergency button feature, Uber also said that users have the option to record audio during their trip to ensure safety, can share their trip information with family or friends and can seek "live help" from a safety agent in the app.

https://fox59.com/news/indycrime/impd-uber-driver-admits-to-raping-killing-indy-woman-before-dumping-her-body-in-an-alleyway/

Which isnt to be confused with Scaphism, aka the final solution for the scrote problem

https://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scaphism

also this is fricking totally not another indicator of the fricking crazy inflation lately