I'm converting to Atheism, what are your main spiritual books that you read to get a better understanding of it?

What are some of your main sources of religious or spiritual literature to help me understand thinking from a materialist perspective?

I've always thought of Atheism as "Don't think about God until you are on your death bed and then pray reverently to try to comprehend the unknown as it is staring you right in the face" is this the case?

I mean, non-existence is kind of a terrifying concept for me, how to you rationalize believing in non-existence of consciousness when facing death?