mutenoct/urnal 9mo ago#5920928
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Surprisingly
to who? people that have never talked to a woman before????
During a recent dinner at a cozy bar in Upper Manhattan, I was confronted with an age-old question about gender norms. Over bowls of ramen and sips of gin cocktails, my date and I got into a debate: Who should pay for dates?
My date, a 27-year-old woman I matched with on Hinge, said gender equality didn't mean men and women should pay the same when they went out. Women, she said, earn less than men in the workplace, spend more time getting ready for outings and pay more for reproductive care.
When the date ended, we split the bill. But our discussion was emblematic of a tension in modern dating. At work and on social media, where young people spend much of their personal time, they like to emphasize equity and equality. When it comes to romance and courtship, young people — specifically women and men in heterosexual relationships — seem to be following the same dating rules their parents and older generations grew up learning.
Contemporary research, popular culture and conversations I had with more than a dozen young Americans suggest that a longstanding norm still holds true: Men tend to foot the bill more than women do on dates. And there seems to be an expectation that they should.
double standards ? in my modern reformation of gender roles ? It's more likely than you think !
if she's got reasonably good genetics $30 a month for makeup, shampoo, lotions etc is plenty to look pretty, plus another $60 every two months for a haircut. I'm happy to copay that. anything beyond $60 a month is self-pampering.
My last gf wore just lipstick usually, if we really dressed up she would put a decent amount on and get her nails done professionally but I wanna see what I'm getting on a casual coffee or lunch date or whatever
50% of the effort is just normal hygiene and skin care that should be expected from everyone, and nails are something women do for themselves
Makeup is an example of a very bad equilibrium. Woman waste ton of time and money to stay competitive, while also comparatively raising their value (looks) compared to men. It benefits hookups and short-relationships, once you commit as a man, you will get the makeup free version and have to like that too. Everybody loses.
it might be true, but i'll let heck freeze over before i pay a fricking shoe and makeup tax to a foid for the privilege of allowing me to go on a date with her
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to who? people that have never talked to a woman before????
double standards ? in my modern reformation of gender roles ? It's more likely than you think !
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I don't have a problem with women expecting men to pay for dates but I do have a problem with them making up cope excuses like this.
actually the getting ready for outings thing is a legit point but the others are not.
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Um I spent $75 at Sephora last week so I deserve free food
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Would you rather women not wear makeup?
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Yes
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Little bit of eyeliner, everything else is smearing shit on your face to hide that you are actually a goblin.
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if she's got reasonably good genetics $30 a month for makeup, shampoo, lotions etc is plenty to look pretty, plus another $60 every two months for a haircut. I'm happy to copay that. anything beyond $60 a month is self-pampering.
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My last gf wore just lipstick usually, if we really dressed up she would put a decent amount on and get her nails done professionally but I wanna see what I'm getting on a casual coffee or lunch date or whatever
50% of the effort is just normal hygiene and skin care that should be expected from everyone, and nails are something women do for themselves
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wrong, colored nails make my peepee hard
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Yeah but you are homosexual so it's a bit different.
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Makeup is an example of a very bad equilibrium. Woman waste ton of time and money to stay competitive, while also comparatively raising their value (looks) compared to men. It benefits hookups and short-relationships, once you commit as a man, you will get the makeup free version and have to like that too. Everybody loses.
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it might be true, but i'll let heck freeze over before i pay a fricking shoe and makeup tax to a foid for the privilege of allowing me to go on a date with her
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