I'm tired of being called a BBW - /r/plussize

Some history before she made this post:

https://old.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/1fvbmej/i_can_breathe_again/

It only took a year of therapy, a shit ton of self help books, a million reddit posts, and an endless amount of mental breakdowns, but I did it.

I was nine months into the breakup and still feeling a tremendous amount of angst. I found myself asking what was wrong with me, if these feelings would ever subside, and if I were going to end up alone and miserable with only my cat to keep me company. It seemed as though every single time that I thought that I was over my ex the universe would knock me back down. I was stuck in an endless loop of anger, sadness, grief, and self-pity.

For months I had dreaded the one year mark in anticipation of the tsunami of emotions that would come with it, but 365 days had come and gone, and as I stared at the calendar on that date I realized that I was okay. I would be dishonest if I said that I wasn't a little melancholy, but not nearly as much as I thought I would be. I still cared about him, part of me thinks that I always will, but the ache in my chest that accompanied the thought of him was no longer there. I remember him and the time that we spent together fondly. I think about the times that he sang to me in the car, and the way that he would kiss me at every redlight, and how he would stroke my hair until I fell asleep.

I truly hope that he's happy. I hope that he heals, and grows, and that he lives a fulfilling life. I hope that he succeeds in his career field, and that he travels the world, and that he learns to love himself in the way that I always did. Sometimes I even hope that one day our paths cross again and that we're both mature enough to maintain a friendship.

I don't know who needs to see this, or if anyone even will, but I just want you to know that everybody's healing journey looks different. Rome wasn't built in a day and rebuilding yourself after a breakup isn't any different. You're allowed to be sad for however long that you need to be, and just because it feels like the pain is going to last forever doesn't mean that it will. Things will get better, and each and every one of you will be okay. Just give it some time.

https://old.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/1fxv6ge/i_really_need_someone_to_talk_to/

Why do people want to play house so badly without being exclusive? And why do I keep putting myself into positions like this?

I always end up falling for men who want to do every single thing that a couple does but have no interest in being exclusive. Most of the time they won't even actually be seeing other people but will adamantly say that they don't just want to stop seeing other people. It makes me feel sad and angry and like I'm never good enough to just be chosen.

Due to all of this I told the guy that I was seeing that if things didn't change soon that I'm going to end things and wholeheartedly meant it. He kept trying to hold me and to tell me that he didn't want things to end, but whenever I rebutted that I wanted him to stop seeing other women he didn't have anything to say. He asked me if I would really go no contact and whenever I told him yes he acted upset and asked me why he wouldn't be allowed to at least see what I'm up to in life. I told him that there would be no point.

He nonchalantly told me that night that I wasn't leaving or blocking him and that even if I did it would only be temporarily, and has continued to say that. Even whenever I told him today that I was truly done he said that I wasn't and that he'll see me Tuesday. That night things settled down and we were cuddling and kissing and he told me that he wasn't doing any of those things with other people and at one point I thought that u had head him say that he loved me but brushed it off. Today during our conversation he said it again and I told him that he didn't. He said that he cared about me and I told him that that wasn't the same thing as loving me, and he said that he had love for me. He also told me that other women respect the fact that he doesn't want anything serious and that I should be able to do the same and more or less kept blaming me for everything that's going on between us. Eventually I told him that it was over. He kept telling me not to hang up the phone and for a while I stupidly kept staying on the phone until I realized that he didn't actually have anything to say. I was honestly mean and blunt towards him and eventually told him that it was over before hanging up.

I'm honestly devastated and fighting for my life not to reach back out to him. Why the frick do I always do this to myself? :/

https://old.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/1fxw9r4/why_isnt_losing_someone_enough_to_change/

Why is it that people will swear up and down that they care about somebody over and over again with their entire chest, but refuse to change? Why is it that someone would rather lose a person that they claim to have feelings for than do better? If I care about someone I do it with my whole chest and I'm willing to make sacrifices for that person, but they're never willing to do the same. Nobody has ever been afraid to lose me, ever. Not my parents, not my friends, not the men that I've dated. I'm never chosen and I never seem to be enough. I'm so mentally drained tonight.

https://old.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/1fzgj69/why_would_he_say_that_he_loves_me/

I ended things with a guy that I was seeing, but I can't wrap my head around his behavior.

A day before I ended things I had told him that I was reaching a point of wanting to end things if they didn't become more exclusive. That night he asked me if I would really go no contact and asked why we couldn't be friends on social media if things ended. Then he told me nonchalantly that I wasn't going to leave him or block him. We were cuddling and kissing later that night and he causally said that he loved me (something that he's never said before) but I thought that I misheard him so I brushed it off. He also reiterated that I wouldn't leave and that we disagree but end up making up.

The day after he said the same things. When I told him that it was over he said that I would never leave or block him and that if I did it wouldn't be for long, and even told me that he would see me on Tuesday. He also told me yet again that he loved me. I told him that he didn't and he said, "I care about you a lot." I told him that that wasn't the same as love and he said, "I have love for you"

What the actual frick is the point of him casually throwing out something as big as "I love you" but yet he isn't willing to commit. I guess it doesn't matter either way because I ended it, but this is bothering me so much.

https://old.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/1gd03w3/i_checked_his_snap_score_and_ruined_my_whole_night/

I ended things with the guy that I was seeing exactly three weeks ago and the last time that I checked his snap score it had barely budged, but within the past few days it's went up significantly and I'm spiraling. I know that I fricked up by checking up on him and that I should've let it be. I really thought that I was fine with everything but now I'm in my room hyperventilating and crying over this. He doesn't use snap much and I'm feeling like he's either snapping multiple women or snapping a ton to one woman, and it hurts my heart so much. I feel like I'm so easily replaceable and like he never gave a shit about me at all. I just want to find a hole and crawl into it. I'm so sad over this.

Also, before anyone comes for me, I didn't want to end things with this man. I tried so fricking hard to make things work but he didn't want to commit and I couldn't keep waiting for him to decide to. If it weren't for that I would still be seeing him.

https://old.reddit.com/r/BreakUps/comments/1ggejrg/you_deserve_better/

My ex said this to me, and the more that I read posts on here the more that I realize how prevalent that that phrase really is. What's with every single person saying this? It feels like such a cop-out. If you truly think that someone deserves better then why not just be better?

I'd ping her but I legit feel for her, relationships are always hard