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I thought being plus sized in ameriKKKa was hard..
But then I went to Paris and I can’t even imagine living here as a woman my size. The chairs are small, elevators can barely fit two people my size, and the scale in my hotel room only goes up to 260 lbs. Yet, I see a lot of women around my size walking around (US size 16/18). My question is for all plus sized women living in Europe: how do you navigate everything not being made for you? I guess in the US I got lucky since the average woman wears a size 16 ish there so most things fit me fine with no problem, but here I feel like a giant lol.
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And I'm just devastated. She's SIX YEARS OLD. I'm racking my brains to think if there's anything in any of the cartoons she's been watching that's exposed her to this twisted misogynistic idea that she must be skinny, or maybe somethings happened at school?? We've always been so body positive in our house.
I'm also FURIOUS at the world she's going to have to grow up in. At the world we all grew up in. Setting our standards by MEN. I'm sure I'm not making much sense but I'm just so angry that my beautiful little baby has been made to think that she's anything less than perfect.
Can anyone give me any advice on what to say to her to help stop her thinking like this? I've mansplained why that's silly and that skinny is unhealthy. Husband took her swimming. Am now sobbing in bed and hating this world.
poor kid, having fat redditor parents
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Trans Women Are Women (not)
@AmbyTheGoblin say this as a feminist ally (TERF)
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!thinFAT FOID COPING AHEAD
You will never get over him saying this. It will play in your head as long as you're with him. He doesn't deserve you.
There are men who will love you and who'll think you're hot exactly as you are. Leave this prick and look for a real partner.
This. My then fiance left a workout DVD on the seat of my car one night so I'd find it when I left for work. That was 20 years ago, we split up a long time ago, and that shit still bothers me.
•
Ask him. "What kind of a response are you expecting from me? Because this is pretty manipulative. Your negativity is yours to fix, not mine."
Yeah, it probably won't go over well. But with a dude like this, who cares? Do you want him trying to manipulate you into "yes, sir, I'll change my body for you" for the rest of your life? He is showing you who he is. Believe him.
Call him out on it. His response will tell you if he's worth making it work.
I would absolutely end this relationship because of this. You deserve a man who is attracted to you 100%, not someone who feels like they are settling. You're going to think about this every time you see him and you'll never know if you're good enough for him. I don't see a future in a relationship where this is an issue.
caring about your partners health = manipulative
One word. Bye.
Actually, 2. Bye, bitch.
Lmfao best comment
He is 100% trying to manipulate you. He’s pretending he thinks he’s the issue, putting himself down, while also shaming you so you’ll feel guilty and change for him. Don’t.
•
Your reply is “this is a you problem, not a me problem. You want someone skinny, go find one.”
Oh snap!!!!! This!
SO MUCH THIS!!!
It feels manipulative to me. Saying you’re wife material, but… Then adding in he feels like he is pushing you and you don’t really want it. I think he wants you to be swooning by the “you’re wife material” so you will say “no I do want it, I do.” Then if you succeed he got what he wanted but it was you who wanted it or if you fail it’s your fault he isn’t marrying you.
I could be wrong, but this is what it feels like to me.
this is the result of women in ameriKKKa being referred to white woman therapists who charge by the hour to talk to you like a friend and validate your experiences and assure you that nothing in life is your fault
Sounds like he needs therapy. You are not the person to help him process his feelings around attraction and weight.
Can you imagine saying anything like this about someone’s body, regardless of their relationship? It is not appropriate and no one else’s responsibly to work through what he is feeling.
The social norms regarding weight and beauty are harmful. They harm everyone in our society.
Your value is inherent.
see, just what i said.
This reads to me as gaslighting and abuse. You're somehow not good enough and need to try harder because he just can't find you attractive as you are? What's next? Where's the line? My reply would be "I will box your shit up and you can come get it at (date and time). Miss it and it goes to the dump." I also have a zero tolerance policy for this stuff because it's a thing I have struggled with my entire life. That cycle just demands me with romance. So soften as needed if you're going this route.
Is he perfect? Why do you need to change but he is just fine? Why isn't he applying this to his own issues? If you're so great and perfect your body should not be a barrier. This is a cop out and disgusting. You deserve better
heckin GASLIGHTING
From one of my favorite TikToks: If I'm too much, go find less.
And follow up: DUMP HIS ASS.
I think this is when you do your hair toss, check your nails, and get the frick gone. I am so very very sorry you had to read his words. I’m sorry you will remember them even for a minute. I’m sorry he hid that from you for so long. I hope with all my heart you can let any of that attachment fall away because you know you lost nothing really and chose you with extreme prejudice. Love and peace to you Goddess!
Ewww. He sounds like one of those men that is attracted to big girls and is embarrassed about it. You deserve SO much better, period. 🩵
ACTUALLY you do want to frick us
Here is your reply: "Baby, I have tried my best to deal with this myself and just ignore it, but I just can't anymore, and I have to be honest with you finally. Your peepee is so small I can't feel anything. The only way I get off is by using my toys, and I know it's a ME problem, but I couldn't keep lying to you anymore."
obligatory small peepee “joke”
MY JAW LEGIT DROPPED UM
how could he say that
- ACA : she should try Philly's spreadable cream cheese
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I went to my Dr. recently. I said I had been watching what I eat, and she said, off the cuff, "not closely enough".
I did a double take and laughed uncomfortably. I have been eating nothing but hard boiled eggs and slices of cheese since. It just dawned on me that I haven't eaten anything in 2 days. Welcome back ED! 😁
Look chud, either I stay obese or I fast in the desert for 40 days. Now look what you made me do!
hard boiled eggs and slices of cheese
also what
A REAL doctor would never tell me to quit smoking.
"Mommy why does that hippopotamus smell so nice?"
This makes me mad and makes me recall why we want low body weight removed from AN criteria.
"NOOO!!!!! STOP DIETING!!! Don't you know it would be dangerous if you were skinny instead of 300 pounds?!!"
"I'm sorry, ma'am, I'm afraid the tests came back positive for.... STUNNING and BEAUTIFUL!"
"Thanks, doc."
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He is 100% trying to manipulate you. He’s pretending he thinks he’s the issue, putting himself down, while also shaming you so you’ll feel guilty and change for him. Don’t.
The guy does deserve a fat gf tbh for not being straight forward.
Lose a few pounds. By dumping the loser
You will never get over him saying this. It will play in your head as long as you're with him. He doesn't deserve you.
There are men who will love you and who'll think you're hot exactly as you are. Leave this prick and look for a real partner.
Never change fat slob redditor queen, he doesn’t deserve you. Find yourself an enabler
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this is the body of a CHILD and if you find it attractive you’re a dirty pedo
this is my favorite part in the thread. fatcel doesn’t realize that normal sized (esp short) women in ameriKKKa have to shop in the kids section because all the adult clothes are always catered to the obesity fandom
!fellas !biofoids is being attracted to short women pedophilia?
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I have:
About half of these subreddits are moderated by /u/mizmoose and /u/DeathToAvocados, who I suspect is just her alt.
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Thread complaining about rDrama and le dox:
Her profile:
https://old.reddit.com/u/mizmoose
Her Instagram with the exact same username, and photos:
https://instagram.com/mizmoose
Does she have any idea how Internet privacy works? Find out on next week's episode of Dramaball Z!
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Lots of people are making excuses about why Bongs aren't living healthier lives. Long covid, depression, gyms are scary, running is too expensive, healthy food is too expensive.
No wonder the government is vehement about returning to the work place. A fit, healthy and happy populate is hard to brainwash and control
Stupid comment. An unhealthy population is one that cannot work, pay taxes, or grow the economy.
They really don't want to talk about the consequences of long covid.
What consequences
Only if you let it.
Well sure. Exercise is still possible. But you're not forced into it the way you are with going to work.
In other words, it's a you problem, not a work from home problem.
No?
If you have to walk a mile then you're walking a mile. No getting out of it.
If you don't have to walk a mile then you have to make an active choice to do so. Its extra on top of the bare basics of living your life.
"If you have to walk a mile then you're walking a mile. No getting out of it."
Yeah so you are actively making the choice not to exercise using the time you save when WFH. That is undeniably on you.
"If you don't have to walk a mile then you have to make an active choice to do so."
That is usually how it goes yes, if you want to be healthy then you have to make those choices. If you don't make healthy choices then that is on you, that isn't WFH forcing you out of healthy living.
Another person who doesn't understand basic psychology here. Having to do something tends to make for a habit that is far easier to keep than choosing to do it.
Yes. You could choose to go for a half hour walk in the morning anyway. But do you seriously think everyone will keep that up as well as if they had to do it to get to work?
What do you mean I have to make an effort
Do you believe the attitude of 'blame everything except myself' is an issue?
There's only so much one's self can do.
One could run for 20 minutes 2 or 3 times a week though right?
Most people don't though.
In my office there are loads of fat people who are eating takeaways multiple nights a week and driving 20 mins to work when they could bike it in 25.
Better on physical and mental health, better on the wallet and better on the environment. I guarantee you people crying on reddit about the same thing will be in the same situation and don't want to improve things themselves.
It just seems so futile and cruel to look at something that clearly affects the majority of people, statistically, and instead of saying "WHY do people not eat better and exercise more--what are the deep underlying reasons that this happens?", just taking an attitude (as many do) of "this is a moral failing and these are less worthy people."
You can say "just eat healthier and exercise" all day long, but the fact is that for most people that won't change a darn thing. So asking questions about why, with compassion and curiosity rather than judgement, is essential to finding out what it is we CAN change.
Honestly, at the very deepest level, the answer is likely to be that we are still animals, beholden to instincts and programming, and humans aren't programmed for the lifestyle of abundance and lack of necessary movement that we have today. People are following deeply ingrained instincts and desires inherited from a time when those made sense. You can't just magic that away by informing people that it's bad. People KNOW that. Some people are better at overcoming it then others, but there are a massive number of factors that are going to make people revert to those instincts because doing what our brains are programmed to want to do feels good. People who are depressed are going to seek what feels good because it staves off the dark feelings a bit. People who are tired are going to seek what feels good because they don't have the energy to hold out. People who have adhd are going to seek what feels good because it compensates for what their brains are not giving them. So on and so on. Looking at it from the perspective of "these people need to shape up and get better habits" is the wrong approach. How do we empower people to overcome these habits ingrained from millennia of evolution is a better question to ask, though it's a really fricking difficult one without simple answers.
If you won't help yourself the don't expect help from others.
Also people are poorer and there us less out there. My local pool have been closed if you enjoy swimming it's 30 min drive to next one now so that is 2 hours out of your day so you don't bother. My local gym went up from £25 to £45 in space of 2 years. Etc. As options are more limited then you bother less and less
A lot of parks have free outdoor gyms, all you really need are pullup bars, dip bars and a set of resitance bands and you can do so many exercises. Here's a map of outdoor calesthenic parks in the UK. Maybe there's one near you.
The weather in the UK is too crap to exercise outdoors
If you're always looking for excuses not to exercise, you'll always find one
Over 10 years of jiujitsu and lifting since I was 21, I’m not making excuses, I’m just not doing chin ups in January in some random park. You do you though.
Sounds like you can afford access to a gym. If you couldn't, would you sit on your fat arse complaining, or make the most of a bad situation?
I’d make excuses, ain’t no way I’m getting mistaken for some guy doing parkour because I’m swinging about on bits of kit in the park.
You can do this at home too. Once it gets warmer then it's no problem.
Working out from home is hard to get motivated and in the summer it’s too ‘ot
Do you have a book of excuses for this, or what?
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- birdenthusiast : Looks like a downie
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Top posts of the last month:
https://old.reddit.com/r/xxfitness/comments/12oynkd/working_out_primarily_for_happiness/
Working out primarily for happiness
Tell me I'm not the only one. Or tell me what prioritizing mental health looks like for you in terms of fitness!
Context: Some months ago, I decided that I'm done working out for aesthetics (after a bad breakup, attractiveness didn't feel achievable or useful). I was sick of all the mixed messaging on what we need to do for overall "health". I decided that fitness was just going to be a treat to myself, so I can go as slow as I want, not stress about being "fat", set zero goals other than showing up and being happy, and just be kinder to myself.
I've very consistently attended fitness classes for years but this mindset has been incredible - I'm not making gains at the maximum pace I could be, sure, but after an awful COVID slump, I feel like my old self again. Fitness has been keeping me sane in a very stressful and emotional time. I wanted to put this into the world and find out if anyone else feels similarly - I'm okay if progress takes years, this isn't my job. I'd rather be happy and healthy than be totally drained trying to keep up with Caroline Girvan every day. (SO MUCH respect to those of you who can do it, you inspire me constantly, I just need to go at my own pace!)
Anyone else happy in the slow lane? Have you discovered anything interesting?
I am supermorbidly obese. I've just started walking at least a mile three or four days a week. Last week, I was thrown off by the week-long rain. What are some exercises I can do inside with little equipment? 
I live on the second floor. I moved in a year ago and I was totally out of breath after four steps! I live in a very hilly area and I have to walk up stairs to get to the parking lot or to go back to my units. So that has been inevitable! I didn't walk much last year because I was self-conscious at how I'd get straight up lightheaded and stumbly after going up a modest set of stairs. Now I can carry up a ton of groceries and then go down and do it again!
Anyway, they say April showers bring May flowers, right? This April has been extra wet. I really felt it when it rained all last week and I only got in a two hour walk on one day. It still doesn't take much to work me out and I recently bought two resistance bands to start to prepare for rainy days! What are some exercises I can do indoors?
I'll be straightforward: I'm 5'6" and 315lbs. I started at 355lbs. Keep that in mind. But also keep in mind that I am still very flexible, so stamina will be the biggest issue for a while still. (I'd love help with that now too, but that's not my primary issue.)
Thank you! I'm excited to try some new things.
Edit: WOW! This response is amazing and so confidence-boosting! I just came in from a long walk and I'll be reading everything y'all have said. Thank you!
https://old.reddit.com/r/xxfitness/comments/12nhgr6/do_planks_ever_get_funner_than_miserable_how_do/
Do planks ever get "funner" than "miserable"?! How do you breathe?! How do you pass the time?! 
Hello frans,
32F, 136lb, life-long skinny-fat (until recently). I'm very new to working out and am learning to really enjoy it! Been doing a lot of dumb bell exercises, and trying to strengthen my core now. I'm doing straight-legged deadlifts and bent over rows, which are becoming fun, but... planks SUUUUCK.
I started with 3 sessions per week 2 weeks ago with 3 sets of 30 second planks, I've slowly increased to 35 seconds. Goal is to just gradually extend by 1-2 seconds each week. I'd be really proud to even reach 60 seconds! However, by 15 seconds I'm just so miserable and time passes SO slowly. I tried to put on a show today to distract myself, which kind of worked, but then because it was slightly easier to do I don't know if I was in proper form. I also find it's hard to take deep breaths in what I believe is proper plank form.
Questions:
1. Do planks get "funner"? Please tell me it gets funner...
2. How do you pass the time?
3. Is it normal to only be able to take shallow breaths during planks?
TIA!
Edit: Thank you SO MUCH for all those that've responded! I haven't been able to respond yet today, and can hardly stay awake at the moment. Just wanted to let you know I see your productive feedback and am so grateful. Can't wait to look into all of these recommendations!
https://old.reddit.com/r/xxfitness/comments/12kkbyf/is_my_pt_bad/
Is my PT bad?

For some context, I’m 160 cm/5’2 height and weight 56kg/124.5 lbs. I’m not very active and I work sitting at my desk 8 hours a day. For the last 2 years, I always feel tired and weak. My knee start to hurt for no reason, I have no energy during the day. I’m insecure about my body and it’s been affecting my mental health. So, I decided to go to the gym to get healthier.
A week ago, I registered at a gym near my house and booked a female PT for 1 month. Even though this place is small, they have female trainers which make me feel a bit more comfortable. Well, I've been having mixed feeling after just training with her for 3 days.
First 2 days were alright-ish. She never ask for my experience or my goal, she never mansplained which muscle the exercise is targeting at and just told me to copy her. I though this was weird but she did correct my form so I just brushed it off. She gave me an eat ‘clean’ meal plan which basically half lean meat and half vegetables. I can have carb but only about 2 slices of bread a day. She also told me to cut oily food which make sense. Though I mostly agree, I also told her that I don’t have time to cook and I eat meals cooked by my family but I will do my best to cut carbs and fat.
On day 3, she asked about my meal and I told her honestly that my family had some fried chicken for dinner but since I know it’s oily, I removed the skin and I ate a whole bowl of salad with it. I was so full from the salad that I only able to finish 1 drumstick. She suddenly flipped. Saying “even if I removed the skin and ate a bunch of veggies , it’s still fried in oil and will make me fat. This will ruin all my efforts in the gym.” She then point to a middle age woman and said, “see that woman, she has been training in the gym for half a year and hasn’t lose any weight”. I was so shocked. I can’t believe what she just said. I get that she was angry with me since I didn’t follow her meal plan but why did she feel the needs to body shame other woman!??
She is asking for my body picture so she could compare after a month but now I don’t feel comfortable to send her, I afraid of what she will think of my body. I don’t even want to go to the gym tomorrow…
Ps: English not my first language so I’m sorry for any grammar mistakes.
https://old.reddit.com/r/xxfitness/comments/132gctg/scared_to_start_exercisingtactics_to_start/
Scared to start exercising/tactics to start exercising 
Hi, I (F16) want to start exercising, and I will start to go to the gym in the summer, but I'm really scared. I'm scared because ever since I was in elementary school, I've been really bad at things like running and I have really poor stamina so it was always embarrassing to do anything physical (I was the kid who was always picked last and always got last: i.e. the time my P.E. teacher left before I finished the mile because even though I was trying to run the whole time, I was so slow it took me 15 minutes) and when I exercise it just makes me feel plain tired and gross. I'm scared to try because I always give up on even really small goals if it's not going my way, but I feel like I really need the exercise to be healthy. Like now I get winded really easily, and any time I try to run I almost immediately get a stomach cramp and have to stop, and when I do things where I have to bend my knees, they start aching and hurting really quickly. I know I need to do it for my health but I'm scared I'll just give up.
Would something easy to start (in the summer because I'm too busy with school to go to the gym and I can't drive by myself) be:
- Walking my dog everyday to get walking in
- Playing just dance because it's fun and also good exercise
- going to the gym with mom when she goes and learning how to use the machines and stuff
- eating less processed foods (when I can start to learn what's good to eat and how to cook when I have time in the summer)
Would some more fun activities like playing just dance help ease my body into exercise more while not giving it a bad association? I just am curious if it is good to try and start exercising like this. Thanks
============================
And so on
Foids smh
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How many times more is this going to be posted?
https://old.reddit.com/r/nhl/comments/137vql6/lizzosized_lunch/jiv6q6k/
Honestly the only thing I’ve heard about any of this is the multiple posts a day on this sub all week.
https://old.reddit.com/r/nhl/comments/137vql6/lizzosized_lunch/jiv7b3t/
Her entire schtick is being a big bitch. Now it’s time to get offended?
Her entire schtick is being a pretty talented musician [-33]
https://old.reddit.com/r/nhl/comments/137vql6/lizzosized_lunch/jiv9jvh/
She is but goddarn it's rude as frick to go around casually calling people fat. [-30]
https://old.reddit.com/r/nhl/comments/137vql6/lizzosized_lunch/jiv5vhp/
This just in: fat people eat more which is why they’re fat. If you’re comfortable with eating a lot and being fat then there’s nothing wrong with this.
https://old.reddit.com/r/nhl/comments/137vql6/lizzosized_lunch/jiv4kp6/
That's not the only reason why people are fat. Some fat people have metabolic disorders. Some fat people live in food deserts. Some fat people have gut microbiomes that contribute to the problem. Some fat people do overeat. It's not a simple issue and making it out to be one is disingenuous. [-5]
https://old.reddit.com/r/nhl/comments/137vql6/lizzosized_lunch/jivc3xu/
This comment section is disgusting. There are many factors that contribute to weight gain, even more so for women. Obesity isn’t as simple as calories in, calories out. This is some ignorant BS right here. She could eat regular healthy meals and still have weight issues. That comment is soooo out of line.
And telling someone they deserve to be ridiculed for their appearance because they ‘put themselves out there’?! You mean overweight and obese individuals disgust you and you don’t want to see them so they should hide themselves away from the public. If they have to go out in public should cover themselves so other people don’t have to see it. What a disgusting mindset. You’re shaming people for their bodies. Could you be any more immature?! As a medical professional I must say, if looking at someone else’s body disgusts you, that’s a YOU problem. Fat people should be allowed to lead normal lives, go out in public, wear swim suits etc without others shaming them for their appearance. This is just a bad excuse for being nasty and hurtful to others.
This goes for disabled persons as well.
You people need a serious paradigm shift. Someone’s weight is none of your business. Making jokes like this is NOT funny; it stereotypes and ridicules fat people.
I guarantee none of you are in a place to judge other people. Y’all need to work on your EQ. [
]
https://old.reddit.com/r/nhl/comments/137vql6/lizzosized_lunch/jivf79b/
I’m fat. It’s not healthy and I’m trying to do something about it. I don’t mind some fat women, especially black women can be sexy when fat. Lizzo is an exception. [-16]
https://old.reddit.com/r/nhl/comments/137vql6/lizzosized_lunch/jiv7ja8/