https://old.reddit.com/r/BeAmazed/comments/1igwfz1/same_people_50_years_apart/

tw: ed and mentions of weight changes, exercise, body dysmorphia

hi all! coming on here for some advice before i have a chance to speak to my therapist next week. i have been in recovery for about 4 years now. when i was actively in my eating disorder, i did lose some weight but restored and then some in recovery. thanks to therapy and coping skills my recovery has been holding pretty strong, but like everyone i can still struggle with intrusive thoughts about food and my body. when i'm anxious i have noticed that i engage in more disordered behavior like calorie counting/body checking, but it has never become the consistent habit it was when i was actively in my ed. the journey isn't linear and i always try not to let the disordered thoughts win.

over the past 18 months, i have started strength training consistently, and about a year ago i started going to orange theory fitness (many in my family are super into it, this is what motivated me to try it, not weight loss). i genuinely enjoy moving my body and getting stronger, and i like the social aspect of the otf classes. i think for the most part i have adjusted well to becoming more physical active (i take rest days, never workout without eating before and after, etc). i still go out to eat, enjoy fun foods, etc.

recently i started to notice some of my clothes fitting differently, however before then i didn't really see a change in my body. in the past month or so, multiple people have remarked that it looks like i have lost weight. these comments can really trigger disordered thoughts, especially because i really have no perception of when i have gained or lost weight. yesterday someone said "you really have lost a lot of weight haven't you?" i have not stepped on a scale in years and don't intend to. however, i'm really scared of this weight loss in a way. my eating disorder is already having a field day with these comments, and i have noticed in the past few weeks that urges/thoughts are higher. i feel pressure to maintain this version of my body in a similar way to when i lost weight during my ed. has anyone here gone through this? would really appreciate some advice. my recovery is everything to me and i don't want to lose it.

Lately I've been seeing so many memes or posts making fun of fat people (mostly women), acting almost as if we're some alien species. Jokes about fat women eating people, being compared to animals, being portrayed as completely desperate or s*x-craved, a regretful one might stand, doing unhinged things like having Oreos in their drawers instead of condoms (recent one I saw lol). Yet being overweight is so common— surely these people interact with fat people all the time and can see we're not that different from themselves? Surely they have fat relatives or friends or coworkers in their lives who regularly prove these stereotypes wrong? In daily life I see so many fat people in relationships so I don't really understand why people act as if fat people are inherently unloveable/unfrickable?

Idk it's probably my fault for using Twitter still and interacting with this stuff so the algorithm keeps showing me similar posts. It's just depressing as heck to be constantly viewed as a disgusting joke and makes me wonder how many people I interact with irl share this kind of sentiment

!foidmoment

"Gimmie my money."

i saw a clip of a german comedian and he has a segment where ppl from the audience are blindfolded and go on „a blind date".

and the guy was asked what he doesn't liek and he just went „i hate fat women"

when i tell you guys the comments where Vile.

i've never rlly went on a date or had a boyfriend and this makes me never want to have one. im literally terrified of someone making fun of me this way, especially behind my back as it so often happens.

it makes me wanna bawl my eyes out.

!foidmoment

My friend. I watch movie "les miserables". I'm finally understand why sIut in America so obesity and no shame. Answer: their ancestor all obesity sIut. Their gene say they be shameless sIut.

Imagine this. You in 1500 England. You walk down street. All fat obesity sIut like first… pic.twitter.com/ygJaepDbgi

— Wei Wu 吴伟 (@WuWei113) January 31, 2025

Never felt more attractive since moving to the US

For context I'm from Puerto Rico and moved to the states about 8 years ago. I've always been a fat girl and experienced a lot of hate for the way I looked. Mostly from the adults in my life, including random strangers and teachers. Back home, people are really open when it comes to criticizing your appearance. I've had people literally come up to me to criticize what I'm eating. Literally complete strangers. Or tell me how good I'm being for eating a salad.

And this happens even is you are thin! And don't get me started if you have darker skin or curly hair! We may be a diverse island but our bigotry is equally colorful. We just hide it behind jokes and get offended when called out. Saying "that you are taking it too personal or it's a joke" when in reality it's a problem.

Long story short PR isn't very body positive even if most of our women can be considered a size 12 and up. Physically I'm a very proportionate fat girl, I have an hour glass figure and carry my weight pretty distributed. And I have a pretty face because people back home always keep telling me that and then follow it up with "you should lose some weight".

I also was a "weird girl" so it was an atomic bomb of bullying. I was too smart or too creative. Too fat or too excited. I really had no room to just be my true self because everything was attached to how I looked.

And being stuck in that cycle of not feeling good enough made me want to change everything about myself just to be felt alone and not bothered for my existence. Before moving to the US I lost a significant amount of weight and it made everything even worse if you believe it. People were now looking at me like a lab rat. Asking if I will lose more and made a game out of my weight loss journey.

When I moved to the states I gained almost 30 pounds of it back. Because the food here is really shit and the native vegetables and meats I really loved go for triple the price here. And I also was dealing with a massive wave of depression from things that happened before I moved.

And I got to say that men really do love fat b-words here! I've never gotten so much male attention in my life or as many compliments from women that are actually genuine. And it took a long time for me to actually get comfortable with them after years of hating myself. And I know that it may come across as shallow for me to find worth in others, but when you have been called worthless for so long you can't help but feel relief in a strangers kind words.

Men have stopped me in the street to compliment me and even offer to buy me stuff. And women always ask me what hair care products I use or that I look beautiful in my dress. I even started buying whatever clothes I wanted because I didn't have the guilt of being too fat to wear them.

I finally stopped looking at that stupid tag at the back of my clothes and actually bought the size that fitted me in that moment. I stopped with the "when I lose some weight I'll wear it" crap. I stopped being afraid or get upset with the work "fat". I stopped caring about if I was too loud or too strong with my opinions. I stopped putting that little fat girl in a cage and decided to let her be free.

Even if I miss my country I can't help but feel so comfortable in myself here in the states. People here just mind their business and are not breathing down peoples neck. I've never felt so confident in who I am and that doesn't only apply to my body. I feel like I have a voice here, even with all that is happening right now.

I'm just so happy that I can finally be my true self and say frick you to the word! I'm proud to say that I'm a fat Latinx girl that finally took up space!

Nature is healing

Sorry if this post is vulgar but it's the truth. Anytime a guy DMs me (i never message first) doesn't matter what app they treat me like a frick toy. Any man that ever shows interest in me seems like they only care about s*x. Sometimes they're misleading because they'll act totally normal then all of sudden start talking sexual which makes me extremely uncomfortable to the point I feel like throwing up. (S*x absolutely repulses me to the point I think I may actually be asexual.) it's gotten to the point I can't even have a descent conversation without being asked something sexual

A few times I have decided to mention that I was almost r*ped in high school to a few of these men to see how they'd react- one apologized then immediately started asking me sexual questions. The other told me "I'd enjoy it".

It's mentally draining being treated like this and it's starting to make me feel icky. I want to date but people either hurl insults at me or treat me like all I'm good for is s*x, and it's starting to really really frick with me. It's like they're brainless zombies that can only think about s*x.

!foidmoment !moidmoment

When I was in school from 2001-2013, my lunches never looked anything like that. I actually really enjoyed the food we were served.

Thanks, Obama. (It must be because of Obama and not because he went to a different school.)

Lookin a lot like a jail tray (minus the fruit cups)

How dare they serve food on a tray!

What's mildly interesting about this?

Shh /u/EasyAsPizzaPie it's a circlejerk thread, those are exempt from being on topic.

They used to be better. Like actual food. If I had a kid and their lunches were this, I'd start packing their lunches myself.

Actual food doesn't include meat, vegetables, fruit or potatoes apparently.

The same corporations that supply the prison system with food appear to also supply the public school system.

If this is what prison food looks like, jailcels need to shut up about food forever.

According to the video, Blanding paid Lyft for a ride from her residence to a party at her cousin's house.

About 10-15 minutes later, a Lyft driver arrived in a Mercedez Benz sedan.

Blanding walked towards the Lyft driver's vehicle, and the Lyft driver locked his doors and started to drive away.

She asked the driver what he was doing, and the driver told her that she was too big to get into his car.

The driver claimed that Blanding was too big to fit into the backseat of his vehicle and that his tires could not support her weight.

The Lyft driver also said that he had this problem in the past and that overweight people need to order Lyft XLs.

Um private company sweaty, they can deny service if they want to?

The junkie is fat! Fat! Fat!

>Imo diet talk is on the rise everywhere right now and it's not entirely unrelated to how right-wing crap is increasing in popularity right now.

Diet talk is right wing is my favorite new redditor talking point

>Tbh I tried to get on RedNote after the initial exodus and I saw a non-zero amount of Chinese ED content in the first half hour. I don't have TikTok on my phone anymore and now I don't look at either.

You mean they eat like normal people instead if the average american?

>Yes to the distraction. Additionally, the rise of diets, "thin is in" and all this type of content are intertwined with the rise of fascism. Ranking bodies and deciding what is "in" vs "out" has always been political.

Fascist always sent the fats to the camps and let the thins go, this is well documented of course

>"No violation found"

reporting someone on TikTok because they aren't 300 pounds

Hi all! I'm a 24F and I've never had any of my partners make me orgasm. None of them are aware of this since I've faked it. For starters I'm extremely self conscious about my body…I'm a bigger woman who doesn't find herself attractive/sexually appealing. I have a hard time letting go and allowing myself to enjoy the moment since I'm constantly worried about the way I look. Yes , I am in therapy.

The men I've been with in the past have all reassured me that they found me attractive and but I didn't believe them. I've tried so hard to enjoy s*x but it just doesn't feel pleasurable for me.

Currently I'm coming out of a two year dry spell where I've become best friends with my vibrator. With that being said I'm worried that I won't be able to enjoy s*x now that I'm so accustomed to orgasming one way. I met a new man who's been extremely reassuring and etc but I can't bring myself to have s*x with him since I only have negative experiences attached to s*x due to the lack of orgasms. I'm not sure what to do for how to even approach this. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

!foidmoment

Proudly stolen from @autodrama

I'm 27(f) and my parents have been fat shaming me for years now, the situation hittig an all time high around 3 years ago. Every single time they see me they will call me fat and just ridicule me in front of everyone.

I started gaining a lot of weight in university. Was depressed. It was covid and I ate as the only way to keep myself sane. I'm not completely overweight (maybe a size UK 14 to 16) but I do have trouble fitting clothes and I admit that I have fat around but steadily it's been getting worse.

It got bad when I had my graduation and I wanted to wear a dress but for months my mum kept insisting I should wear my work clothes aka pants and a shirt. I really wanted to wear a dress and went to buy one eventually but when my mum finally cracked that she thought I would look fat in it I nearly flipped. I felt so mad about the fact she wanted to take away one of the most important things in my life all because I had belly fat.

Then comes visiting them for a family vacation and every single moment my dad would nag about my weight. I would drink juice and he said I would be fat. I couldn't even buy things with my own money especially food and the entire trip I just spent wishing I could go home. He wouldn't stop even though I screamed at him to mind his own business. Ever since he had a healthscare he became a health nut, lost a lot of weight and always wanted to force me and my brother to slim down but if anything it just made us not care even more.

Now I'm visiting my brother for his graduation and the entire time he and my mum kept criticising me about looking fat. My mum even went back to the whole wanting me to wear my work clothes which I loathe to the max to keep my fat hidden. I twisted my foot the day before too and my dad kept putting it down to me being fat instead of the fact the curb was uneven and I was trying to move out of someone's way when I stepped to the side and slipped. I gave up arguing with him and he kept droning on and on about how I should lose weight. He even made me promise to lose weight which I told him I am not making empty promises I will not keep and that's on top of him nagging me to change jobs and me not being ambitious enough for the future.

My family members are generally on the thin side so I do stick out when it comes to weight. I abe tried everything since I was young to lose weight but whatever I tried doesn't work, if anything it gave my body more problems like feeling even more exhausted or sleep deprived of trying to do running before class and not having enough to eat. Weight is just one of the aspects my parents always compare me to with my parents and I absolutely hate it.

I am so sick and tired of being fat shamed. Makes me hate myself so much but I do not have the energy after work to go run or do work outs because of my work schedule making me hard to fit time in to do it. I already cut down my food and my partner has been trying to help too but right now I just feel I rather die than have to deal with my parents health bullshit. I had a period where I was so stressed with work I didn't eat and lost quite a bit of weight and when I told my parents how miserable I was, they gleefully told me they're happy I'm losing weight and that I should continue like this when I was losing my mind and contemplating suicide. They were so disappointed when I was happier and gained back the weight I lost after that which was why I never call them and pretend they never existed.

This hasn't been the only aspect my parents tried to control. They would force me into religion that I had no love for and force me to do things like hang out with people I absolutely hate. My parents have been comparing me to their friends or females in the family especially when it comes to accomplishments and looks. I always had the sense they were ashamed of me and wished I could be the holy smart beautiful daughter like everyone else. It's a miracle I even have a partner who loves me for who I am and even said I am beautiful despite everything my parents paint me out to be and joining in trying to lose weight with me.

The only plus side is I live in a different country for work and it gives me an excuse to not deal with my parents by not calling but whenever I have to meet them in person, this shit happens.

What do I even do? I'm so so so tired having to balance everything in my life and right now my main focus is my job and my weight isn't the main concern on my mind.

!foidmoment