I honestly don't understand how people are so upset a woman is sexual and not just in a self pleasing way, and it's actually searching for what she wants
It's because of the way you're framing it. You do not NEED s*x. You might find it really important and fulfilling but it is not a need. Food, water and oxygen are needs. I promise you can and will survive without s*x.
I'm a biologist, I'm aware of my hormonal cycle and get tested often, I know s*x is deeply wired in us and often our brain translates it as a need. That's a biological fact - reproduction is a need for species survival and our brain makes us want to have s*x to the point in which it seems like a need. I don't want children, but my sexual side is very important and I really want to fulfill it. Ofc it's not a need in the sense that I'll die without it. I need it to feel like my life is full, though, because it is one of my priorities. Not everyone is like this, but I am.
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