Need sandwich advice

!goyslopenjoyers

Okay, so I just got back from subway, and I ordered my normal sandwich (footlong BMT), and I got it with provolone and mustard and ranch sauce and olives and pickles and banana peppers nad lettuce and onions and tomatoes and also bacon, and an extra large soft drink and 2 choco (thats what i call chocolate) chip cookies, and the cute latinx girl behind the counter was trying to look away from my face and also holding back laughs. I realized I had just ordered what my stomach asked for and not what society would deem a sandwich with manners. Why people have to judge sandwich etiquitte is beyond me. Frick those people. So anyways, my sandwich was apparently very unacceptable because everyone was staring at me when I went to get my soft drink from the fountain.

In a last ditch attempt to save face, I said my soft drink choice out loud while I poured it at the fountain. "Diet coke! I love diet coke because im watching my health!" and I made sure to suck in and lift up my chest harder than normal while I walked out the door.

So basically, I'm looking to start learning how to build a goal-oriented sandwich that shows that I have class and taste, I am tired of my dining habits preventing me from picking up the Ladies. For instance, what is a good kind of bread to start with, and what meat looks the best on it? Any help is appreciated.

Thanks!