Wife is out doing hot girl shit. Im here with my ‘apparent' offspring. Lmao hahahaha. jk they are mine. Its a joke. Chill. Anyways… AMA
Or dont. Idk. I cant sleep. They are already asleep bc im not like a dad who jumps on the furniture and stirs them all up. No. I show them reptiles on google images and teach them how to tie their shoes or whatever. But i will probably get yelled at tomorrow bc “shoes are filthy! Omg did they wash their hands” or “you taught my babies how to tie KNOTS!?” Then later she will apologize and cry because she couldn't get them to figure it out and she was just jealous or some shit. Up down up down. The key is to always love one another. Never keep score! God i do love her. I wonder what she is doing. I am uncomfortable without her here because we never really leave one another. Sikeeee. Except me leaving her 14 hours a day (thats what she would say if she were here). We are always apart tbh. It sucks butt. I cant express all of this IRL because its super clingy. I pretend i dont even care. She has no idea i am so attatched. I hate how i cant fall asleep. Like why am i so dependent on another human's presence? Thats so gay. Omg imagine if we broke up. How do people even do this? Wtf. Can you imagine? The house is quiet. Even my dog is asleep. Two kids. 2 dogs. 3 cats All fast asleep. Im watching a youtube video on fricking CITY WATER TREATMENT Steps. Its super boring but this is how i will Mansplain later when someone goes on and on about tap water or something. Late night Data harvesting.
Anyways. Its her friend's birthday. Guess im waiting for her to get home. Idk. Dont worry i havent even messaged her. I keep this all in my head. It can never spill over. Im supposed to be all stoic and shit.
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