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antonio
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tech/science swag.
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/h/slackernews LOG /h/slackernews MODS /h/slackernews EXILEES /h/slackernews FOLLOWERS /h/slackernews BLOCKERS
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This redditor agreed:
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Why is agile bad?
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The inherent belief that dedicating roughly 40% of your work week to pointless meetings means that you'll somehow be more productive.
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On the plus-side, if you're not expected to have cameras on, you can get a lot of hobbies/rdrama done.
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Literally me playing Nier during a pointless 2hr meeting today.
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I played Elden Ring during every meeting last March. Had to triple check that my mic was muted, but otherwise was very comfy
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Yeah I have to watch out for that. I also have two keyboards between my 3 computers (personal desktop, personal laptop. work laptop) and sometimes I catch myself typing on the wrong keyboard. Worse thing that I ever did with that was write what I was betting on during a premier league game in my work slack channel instead of my friends group chat. I just had a few people laugh at that so not so bad.
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Dude buy a KVM switch or one of these keyboards that can switch between Bluetooth adapters
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Well is there to keep check on the workers that they don't waste their time. Because in 90's developers would create a lot of stuff but most of it was useless for end project.
So instead implemented these fricking meetings to reduce wasted time. But the meetings somehow became more wasted time since there were a lot of people that doesn't need to go to these meetings.
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That's not Agile. That's corporate bullshit and SAFe.
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My understanding is it was some corpo speak initiative that somehow morphed into a role that's a fusion between a tech middle manager and an HR person.
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We can discuss that in today's stand up meeting.
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No, that's not the time for it. We can discuss what went wrong in the retro and adapt our process.
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Because even though it's supposed to help unblock strike teams, it's usually just there to report progress up the chain and accrue technical debt with sprints always pushing to an MVP.
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It really is not surprising how much better a projects codebase turns out when you aren’t doing daily builds
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Yes Mr. Manager I have just the thing for you to understand code monkeys and knowledge work, you just have to pay for a certification course that will teach you strange esoteric rituals that supposedly improve productivity. You don't have to understand "why" you just have to do it because everyone else in the industry is doing it.
\
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It really is just carrying around a tiny notebook of things needing done and when
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One of the government program offices I work with implemented agile and scrum and they had a mass exodus of all their top engineers, all the contractors are gone and the only people left are the government employees near retirement.
Shit that happens when the people with PMPs start outnumbering the folks with CCIE's.
Good job security for my field engineers.
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Can't say that about the help any more, massa.
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Realize you cannot place middle managers in actually relevant and important jobs challenge. (impossible)
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Most of "my peers" in government are folks that were never technical, retired at O-4 or O-5 and their leadership experience consists of getting 19 year olds to brush their teeth in the green zone.
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sounds half right
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It's called a hustle chud.
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Why is scrum and agile seen as bad?
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a "scrum master" is only useful for one hour of the week. they are 100% replaceable with virtually anyone who can also do the work the team they are managing is supposed to be doing.
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every job ive had the team members take turns doing it each week, cant imagine it being an entire job, its more like a chore
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I hated doing it so I’m glad my manager does it this time around. A project managers job should be to shield the team from unnecessary meetings and defend the project from the company and the client to keep the grift going for as long as possible.
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Alot of dudes aren't paid what they deserve and they in it for mission, but you start introducing gay shit like sprints and then the juice ain't worth the squeeze and you leave.
I get paid good and love what I do, but if some non-EE with a PMP and a agile certification came in and tried changing the way I operate I'd be out fast as gas.
Starlink, Hughes or Inmarsat would hire for $50k+ more than I make now, but I don't want to do that because I'd be on the business development side of the house and that's gay.
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I'm not too familiar with EE work, but it doesn't seem like something that Agile should be used for. Agile is preferable for software. However, scrum masters tend to be relatively useless in general.
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The only thing a scrum master does is add a meeting to your day to ask you if you did a thing and if you didn't ask you why not and when it'll be done, which is the same meeting as the other three meetings you've had for your agile standup, conversations with your team, and emails from your boss.
Krayon sexually assaulted his sister.
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Every one I came into contact with was some butthole who thought they were leading a military and everyone just hated them. And the arguments were always over filling out a stupid fricking spreadsheet. Absolute waste of money and space human beings.
Krayon sexually assaulted his sister.
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Probably retired e7
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The professional meeting team got laid off
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What the frick? How do they have 1100 Agile leads? We hired one of these morons on accident once and he was the fricking worst, like six hours of meetings a day to move things around on a board. He didn't understand shit so his whole job was basically asking people a trillion questions about every decision and then moving a Jira ticket in response. Productivity increased after he left, because the TPM started doing it and didn't have to ask "what does the database do?"
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100% of a scrum master's job can be automated with chat bots.
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Most PMs are white women with few skills
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Scrum masters make PMs look useful
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You can read all about their journey creating the Agile Developer Lead on this now redacted blog post
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Another euphemism for "middle management".
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Wasn't 'scrum' supposed to rid the middle managers, and have programmers manage themselves?
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Codecels will be begging for middle managers back after experiencing scrum masters
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I have a scrum master, a manager and scrum coach.
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Amazing grift
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Can't leave code monkey alone. There needs to be a handler
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Yes but that would mean 30% of the office workforce would be deemed unnecessary.
Companies can't have that.
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I have someone with a similar meme position on my team and I genuinely have no idea what they do outside of occasionally attend meetings where they might ask some barely relevant questions
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Well their job is very important and it consists off:
organizing the zenhubthat nobody needs to check or update
sending messages to the teamthat pretty much everyone is already aware of
keeping messaging channels openthe ones that nobody uses or bothers to check
agrees on software and communication platformsthat are the most inconvenable, but is paid to shill
makes sure the product owner is in the blueand the customer has no clue what the frick is going on
makes 100s of pointless meetingsmakes sure 20% of all the hours of programmers are wasted by being physically present in pointless meetings
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a good scrum master is a dev who tells management to frick off and helps with onboarding and documentation for new devs
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they don't exist
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scrum masters are the most useless people in an entire dev environment. Absolutely no reason to have one.
Krayon sexually assaulted his sister.
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As long as it doesn't affect my credit card rewards I'm fine with it
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Neighbor what the frick is a agile delivery lead
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I thought agile was meant to rid pointless middle managers and lead positions
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management, uh, finds a way
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If anyone bothers to explain it, you're going to immediately start asking why ANY company would have 1100 of them at any point.
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I always believed AGILE was bullshit. Just corpo speak for we will make you do multiple tasks instead of just one.
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In an ideal world, agile meant less wasted time because it involves pushing to production and scrapping projects faster. But it’s like raising inflation to create more jobs, eventually people realize the jig and you fall back where you started with unnecessary staff.
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That ideal world version still sounds dumb. Just have a project head who actually understands what's going on.
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It’s not just a project lead but an organizational thing. The goal is to have test builds for certain features ASAP so you can recycle them if they don’t land with the audience. That’s why it’s used in tech and why you’ll get demo features on most social media platforms that get pulled fast.
It saves on the massive launches that completely bomb. That said, most places it bombs because it requires competent middle management and upper level management to understand what’s going on.
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oh okay that makes sense I guess.
lol.
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Who is the SCRUM master on rDrama.net
Follower of Christ Tech lover, IT Admin, heckin pupper lover and occasionally troll. I hold back feelings or opinions, right or wrong because I dislike conflict.
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Me
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You're more like the c*m master
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BARD BOT ALERT! Reset the counter! Current counter was: 0 days 00 hours 37 minutes and 46 seconds
Record is 1 days 03 hours 34 minutes and 29 seconds by Shreddedmanlet
longest streak broken in the last 7 days was Russia which was 0 days 11 hours 57 minutes and 35 seconds
Best friend is aminobastard with 35 mentions
rdrama is currently running at 205.244 µBardyhertz with 2091 total mentions since 2022-09-24
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These layoffs are traumatizing to me as a dev. These people cozy up to me because they have no deliverables so when they lose their jobs I feel bad for them
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Women should not have the right to choose who to mate and breed with. That decision should be made for them by rational men of intelligence. If women continue to have rights, they will only hinder the advancement of the human race by breeding with degenerate men and creating stupid, degenerate offspring. This will cause humanity to become even more depraved with each generation. Women have more power in human society than they deserve, all because of s*x. There is no creature more evil and depraved than the human female.
Snapshots:
https://web.archive.org/https://www.teamblind.com/post/Capital-one-layoffs-CBBBfsuO
ghostarchive.org
https://archive.ph/?url=https%3A//www.teamblind.com/post/Capital-one-layoffs-CBBBfsuO&run=1 (click to archive)
thelayoff.com's thread:
https://web.archive.org/https://www.thelayoff.com/t/1kKf9jXi
ghostarchive.org
https://archive.ph/?url=https%3A//www.thelayoff.com/t/1kKf9jXi&run=1 (click to archive)
r/nova thread:
https://undelete.pullpush.io/r/nova/comments/10g15mh/capital_one_layoffs_agile_division_1100_employees/
https://web.archive.org/https://old.reddit.com/r/nova/comments/10g15mh/capital_one_layoffs_agile_division_1100_employees/?sort=controversial
ghostarchive.org
https://archive.ph/?url=https%3A//old.reddit.com/r/nova/comments/10g15mh/capital_one_layoffs_agile_division_1100_employees/&run=1 (click to archive)
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