lol Google. More like Poorgle. Codecels take another L
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cyberdick
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/h/slackernews SETTINGS /h/slackernews LOG /h/slackernews MODS /h/slackernews EXILEES /h/slackernews FOLLOWERS /h/slackernews BLOCKERS
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I think my biggest issue with big tech companies is when they don’t dog food their own shit.
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Agreed but chromebooks are for kids and grandma not workers
But let's be honest "management" / marketing / HR ain't doing real work
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It blows my mind how much ewaste ego generates. I fixed some 8-12 year old laptops this week and as far as word processing and email writing goes you'd never guess how old these things are, they'd work fine for most any manager, but managers want to feel important, want to look important and most of all want to be able to goof off on their work computer so god forbid it can't play 2k video from chrome
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I get a new laptop almost every year cause I always accidentally spill water or wine on it at some point
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foids are pretty hard on laptops
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I’m not a foid
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tbh twinks are the biofoids of men
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Who else would drink wine? Wine aunt erasure.
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I would conveniently spill something on my MacBook right before the end of year tech budget just to get a new one. Once we got downgraded to shitty Lenovos I never spilled again
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I don't even like PCs and I have 3 quality ones, 2 crappy ones, and a MacBook and I've only paid for the cheapest and oldest one.
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it is becoming more and more apparent to me that you might be the most based poster on this site
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trans lives matter
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Chromebooks are establishing a niche previously occupied by thin clients. Think banking, customer service in retail, etc.
Still would be insulting to go from an expensive windows machine or Mac to a Chromebook
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My friend bought a chromebook and it has deleted everything on itself (including D&D character sheets) maybe 3 times
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I think Google is famous (more like infamous) for employees not using gcp and instead a private internal cloud platform. Makes sense why gcp lags so far behind in marketshare to aws and azure.
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Apple uses WebEx and won’t let their employees WFH. It’s pretty funny.
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Facetime is not a replacement for Zoom
I won't pretend webex is defensible tho
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If a company already has Cisco phones (like the physical phones at desks) then they get WebEx for free. Pretty sure that's most of their customer base, companies that were effectively already paying for it when COVID hit and all of a sudden everyone was scrambling for video chat services.
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Yeah this is enterprise sales 101 so I get why they use webex. I just like to pretend Apple is different and cares about stuff like software quality
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Based masochism
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GCP is a deal right now. Google is desperate for cloud market share and will cut insane deals
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And then their blackbox AI thinks your account is spam and shuts down all your production cloud stuff in the middle of the night, with no way to contact customer service and no recource
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There may be some downsides to their neurodivergent desire to remove human interaction from their cloud business
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IMO their interface is shit compared to AWS or even Azure. It's not intuitive. But that's common for engineers driving customer-facing products. They have no ability to understand how to build for laymen.
Krayon sexually assaulted his sister.
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Amazon is still working towards migrating to native AWS
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everybody ive known whos worked at microsoft fricking hated having to use ms stuff lol
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I unironically think that M$ dog fooding is what lead to https://massgrave.dev
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holy shit imagine showing up to your job and you're given babby's first laptop
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I code with a Chromebook
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Why are we put here? Just to suffer?
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Moar like Cringebook!
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Google, more like Frugal lmao
I hope they all die of starvation
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That was way better than OPs joke
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OP should kill xemself for missing this
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hahahaha get fricked
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https://uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/officespace_111.jpg
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bahahah this is who I thought of when I read the stapler part.
Krayon sexually assaulted his sister.
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Holy shit big tech really isnt handling this downturn well after over a decade of a roaring market
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They fear fricking with their babied kushy job image they spent years building so instead of doing actual changes they jew you on staplers
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Startups going to be looking really nice when interest rates start going down.
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There's so much waste at corporations when a few coders and business people keep things afloat.
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Money was practically free for 10 years. You're darn right they won't be able to survive it
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How does this happen to a multi-multi billion dollar company like Alphabet?
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KKKRAPITALISM IN ACTION
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Downsizing your employees free 3000cal lunch, instead of your next months grain stockpile to buy more yachts, to buy more yachts
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Food is a kkkapitalist invention. Socialists photosynthesize like God intended.
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Instead of 1000 farms, imagine if we just had 1 farm and forced city kids to work the fields. Imagine the savings!
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Is this before or after we kill those thieving sparrows?
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Google has had an infantile mentality for a while, one based on momentum from its early years and the idea that Google is and always will be best of the best when it comes to innovation. Turns out it's hard to pivot when you scale up and up and throw away good will.
Search is worse than ever. Telemetry. Removing the YouTube dislike button. Half-assed projects no one cares about. Stupid, reddit-tier interview questions that spread to the rest of the industry. What exactly does Google offer these days besides drinking up ad revenue?
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Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can't lose.
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My uninformed schizo opinion:
1. economic downturn partially from covid era frickery by the fed and the silicon valley bank failure are slaughtering tech corps that are vastly overstaffed and have fricked up management bureaucracies composed of people who haven't dealt with any major economic struggles before
2. google hasn't progressed in 10 years - the stagnation, combined with reduction in quality of their major services like youtube and search (try searching anything even remotely technical without appending 'reddit' or 'stackoverflow' these days)
3. bing of all fricking things eating their lunch by actually improving and innovating on search (with bing surpassing google in the app store for a while), then the subsequent failure of bard has them really scared
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The amount of decline in the quality of Google search can not be overstated . My brain is fully trained at this point to outright ignore the first four or so results of any search, because those spots are now reserved for Ads and SEO bullshit pretending to be what you searched for but actually are also just ads. One would think a search engine would pride itself on delivering what you were searching for as near the top as possible.
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I...hope you meant
Otherwise that's a pretty big L
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I worked for a mid-size (not tech thank god) company during the 2008 recession and the answer for us was that our company was leveraging its sales revenue to get massive bank loans, and when the shit hit the fan, the banks started dictating what the company would do internally. And the orders from the banks were a ton of layoffs. As big as Google is, I suspect some of the same shenanigans are happening even there.
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Yeah, I posted a link to a letter Blind dug up from one of their investors that told Google they need to cut more people and engineers aren't that valuable and need to be paid less. lol
Krayon sexually assaulted his sister.
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Link?
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Here you go. https://rdrama.net/h/slackernews/post/141897/investors-send-letter-to-google-to
Krayon sexually assaulted his sister.
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I doubt it's that. Their debt is lower than their current assets. I bet a lot of their cash is locked away in rather illiquid instruments (ie treasuries/other bonds) so it's either cut costs now or say goodbye to billions in cash.
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"Cutting costs"
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((Accountants)) running the show instead of cowboys
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Money isn't real
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This was basically true for giant companies when interest rates were bottomed out. created a big asset bubble that they can leverage for capital anytime they want. Now things are getting a bit more real
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LOL
the humanity
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I'd rather kms than ever code on a remote vm
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Google is just going to turn into the office equivalent of a potluck. Everyone bringing different office supplies to share.
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I wonder how much per year google was spending on tape and staples. This how to be rounding error for them, right? Unless....poorglers are stealing office supplies. But why steal tape and staples?? Well, google literally had to take away your scotch tape because the were stealing it to tape back their scrotums and schlongs. Please, please let us start this rumor.
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I regularly steal tape, pens, staples etc. I ain't buying it on my dime when I can take it from work.
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"oh, and slip cyanide in 1 out of every 3000 Keurig pods"
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BUT WHEN ELON DOES IT
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Why do they have more employees than Nissan? What do you even need them for? Why do tech companies just grow like tumors, with no direction or purpose?
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During the latest hiring binge they had to dig deeper into the talent barrel, so to speak. Now they have an army of unproductive morons who still have Big Tech Employee salaries, self-esteem, and entitlement. So yeah, it’s more of this or more layoffs, but probably both. Not sure how they’ll keep the actual talent if they start charging for food or something though.
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It's like that XRA skit where they lose millions in stolen staplers. Except now it's not a joke
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Snapshots:
archive.org
ghostarchive.org
archive.ph (click to archive)
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