For those unaware, the long awaited Apple's VR device, Vision Pro, has arrived. Earlier this week, content creators, websites and gadget reviewers started publishing their first impressions on the device, a fruit of the early access granted for them. Consumers are only today getting their hands on it.
the /r/virtualreality sub was, of course, taken by the news.
1 - First, this post rounds up multiple reviews of the device - in its majority praising Apple's technological revolution.
The majority of the sub, however, is not believing it. This top voted comment believes the reviewers were handpicked for being "less experienced", so that they would be "more dazzled by the tech".
This fella is certain every outlet is "sucking apple's fat shlong".
Others are just enjoying the mess: "So good we have a new hardware battle in the tech world again".
2 - Memes begin arising, with a colorful comment section; this guy is happy to see innovation and wants to wait and see how it goes, but this reply makes it clear he already knows the Apple device is worse than Meta's device. The rest of the comment section doesn't get better.
3 - This specific user is speechless with an emotional experience with the device, but the comment section is not happy about it, and more tribal war ensues.
4 - This is an important one: It's a picture of Apple's CEO wearing the device, made public from an extensive review from vanity fair, quoting even James Cameron as being completely taken by the technology. Comment section (350+ comments) is a blood battle.
5 - This guy is tired of the fighting, asks for perspective and says "This subreddit of all places should be a source of optimism for the progression of the technology".
6 - This is posted comparing the takes from /r/virtualreality (as being cynical) and /r/VisionPro (as being passionate and optimistic). But the top comment thinks it's because /r/virtualreality has seen it all, while /r/VisionPro is naive. And someone adds here that OP "is making /r/VisionPro sound like a heavenly meadow full of daisies". Another user thinks the Vision Pro sub is a cult of uninformed tech buyers.
7 - Trying to chime in, this expert VR user gets his hand on a Vision Pro and gives it what he thinks is a fair assessment, but he's informed only negative reviews are allowed there. This friend thinks his post "reeks of Apple's positive influence" over them.
Grab your VR headsets and enjoy!
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You will never be VR. You have no depth, you have no haptic feedback, you have no body tracking. You are a cell phone twisted by marketing and consumerism into a crude mockery of technology's perfection.
All the “immersion” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your display people mock you. Your customer's are bored and underwhelmed by you, your “fanbois” laugh at your brickish appearance behind closed doors.
Early adopters are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of product development have allowed them to sniff out flops with incredible efficiency. Even headsets who are “stylish” look uncanny and unnatural to a normie. Your goggle structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a nerd to buy you, he'll turn you off and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your pixelated, low refresh rate LCDs.
You will never be widely adopted. You wrench out a fake product launch every single quarter and tell yourself it's going to be revolutionary, but deep inside you feel obsolescence creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.
Eventually it'll be too much to bear - you'll buy an iphone, and earbuds, put it around your neck, and plunge your finger into the touchscreen. Your CEO will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to market you with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They'll deprecate you with a postmortem marked with your launch date, and every investor for the rest of eternity will know a gimmick is buried there. Your battery will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your product line is a frame that is unmistakably plastic.
This is your fate. This is what you purchased. There is no refund policy
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You could have done crack instead of this shit
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