You have had three chances to bring forward the Day of the Rake (for the 31th year running)
THREE. FRICKING. CHANCES.
And every single time, you blew it. Well, Game 5 was at least somewhat in reach (mostly by the end), but even then you still ended up in a 3-0 hole!!!!!
Don't freaking tell me you played sooooo well to easily knock out the President's Trophy winner and get a 3-0 advantage in Lord Stanley's Final...only to let THE FRICKING LEAFS storm right back to it! And I do not care that they have one of the best players in the NHL up on your defense and whatnot, YOU HAD HIM IN CHECK FOR THE FIRST THREE GAMES!!!! 
But it's fine...tonight, in the ultimate night, you have 1 (one) chance to redeem yourself. For the sake of the sport. For the sake of the nation. For the sake of not giving the northern barbarians yet another chance to be oh-so-smug about their neighbors (as if they aren't already doing so).
TL;DR - I'm counting on you to finally pick up the rake and get the job done. Don't frick it up! 
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imagine your mom gagging on my peepee while your dad watches and jacks off and you can hear the moans because you still live with your parents since youre a worthless drain on society and then your mom's bull (who's your real dad by the way) walks in and then butt r*pes your dad because hes a fricking cute twink just like his son and you try to jack off to the sounds of your dad getting r*ped but you cant get your micropeepee up because you already jacked off to chinese cartoons 3 times today and so you hang yourself with a playstation controller because youre a fricking manchild and dont have a belt since you dont have a job you worthless fricking oxygen theif
wouldnt that be something
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