can't handle at the gym

Today at the YMCA I finally had enough. This is the 5th time I have had an uncomfortable situation with a man, in which no action was taken in my defense.

Some man with his 2 little boys was leering at me, making kissy faces at me while I was trying to do down dog so I moved to another side of the room and he moved chairs to keep staring. In front of his children

The next incident involved a very flamboyant man doing dead lifts with see through shorts that left NOTHING to the imagination. Reminder that this is a family gym and there were high schoolers looking and laughing at him. Management was informed and no action was taken.

yikes, cool it with the homophobic remarks sweaty

The 3rd incident involves an unsupervised child knocking over my water bottle and spilling water all over my phone but I felt like I would just be considered a b-word if I spoke up

The 4th happened on Monday when a teenager that's a full foot taller and at least 80 pounds heavier shoulder checked me in the hallway! Like, so hard that I hit the wall

As I exit, these two older grandpa looking men seem to coming in so I try to hold the door to be polite. They wave to me that they are staying outside and I move on

one of the grandpas is now pushing the other sled RIGHT NEXT TO MINE even though there's no one else on the patio and lots of open space.

half way through my last run (I'm pulling 100 lbs and walking backwards) I RUN INTO THIS GRANDPA BECAUSE FOR SOME REASON HE'S RIGHT BEHIND ME.

I freak out because I'm startled and I hit my Achilles tendon on his fricking sled so I tell him to watch out. He just like laughs at me? Smiles or something? So I finish my run and go inside to tell management that he's being unsafe

When I get outside I hear the same person I'd reported to MAKING FUN OF ME to 2 teenagers.

he had the audacity to tell me I was in the wrong because the old man is disabled

What do you think? Was I being dramatic?

yes

Y'know, if you're prepared to quit anyway, I'd keep going until someone was a creep again. And then, just fricking unload on him, both barrels. Verbally, of course. It will be cathartic for you and hopefully humiliating for him. What are they gonna do, kick you out?

Bro you go to the YMCA for the gym? Mistake number 1😮😮😮 always a fricking mistake.

It is never someone's mistake for being harassed or assaulted. Your comment has victim blaming all over it. We should not be accepting that we should just avoid certain public places because they are poorly run. Yes of course we should take our business elsewhere and report it, but what I mean is it should not be acceptable behaviour ANYWHERE.

victim blaming??!?

The Y is a christian organization, hence the misogyny. Good luck.

The YMCA is an evangelical Christian organisation, I don't want to be negative but it'll be full of small minded patriarchal attitudes. I worked for them 20ish years ago and remember the homophobic comments from one of the directors. You're better to give your cash and patronage to somewhere without this background.

the Y is a Christo-fascist organization

I don't like that you said “flamboyant man” to describe the man.

While most people look at the Y as a gym, look at its name. It is the Young Men's Christian Association. It is theoretically religious in nature. If they feel it is their religious right to discriminate or disregard women, then they can legally do so. I'm not defending them. Just pointing out their buttholery. There is something telling when you look at their mission statement as opposed to the one for the YWCA. Unless you find something specifically in the rules for the YMCA which states their behavior towards you was against those rules, you are screwed. As for the YWCA, their mission statement specifically states that women have the right to be safe and chose the direction of their lives. I didn't see anything like that for the men's.

I've never had as many awful experiences at a gym as I have at the Y, I don't know what it is about that place. The absolute worst was the time I caught a guy masturbating while watching me work out.

That is sexual assault!

All of these are male aggression, even if they are smiling and talking softly, and whatever they spin it as: "just being friendly", "paying a compliment", and the stinking "men can't help it", etc. This is not even about you personally or their sexual gratification. It's about power and misogyny. They see a woman and immediately decide to play their sick dominance game because they think they are entitled to do so to any woman. They want to make you uncomfortable and feed on your nervousness and internal struggles. Don't ever let them make you doubt yourself and your demand

Just yesterday in some gym-related post I've seen a ton of gaslighting comments about how women exaggerate gym creeps problem and how no one cares about you in the gym (unless you're wearing 'attention seeking' clothes, then apparently everybody is allowed to stare and harass you). Bullshit.

Why are men so unwilling to even entertain the idea that they might be in the wrong??

Be sure to give them negative reviews on Google Maps, Facebook, Twitter, etc.

I just went to a steam room at the Y which is coed. Older dude kept trying to talk to me. I gave a couple short responses and eventually left to wait for my bf to come in with me since I just didn't want to deal with it. When I came back (my bf was on his way) dude kept talking to me asking crazy shit “are you in high school?” “Which Y do you go to?” WTF I couldn't believe it. This is out of pocket or is it just me?

Co-ed steam room? I don't think those exist, she probably just ran into a