is crying over being denied a month-long vacation to celebrate Christmas, New Year and her birthday. In a bizarre twist, most redditors agree that this is an unreasonably long break

The entire thread is a bunch of !foidmoment s

OP

I can't believe I'm crying over my boss denying my time off for a month to spend time with my family for next Christmas 2024 and my 30th birthday January 2025. She denied it when everyone else is getting their extended leave and one week time off every other month. Her reason was 21 days (three business weeks) is the max. My ideal flight day is on the 23rd of December but it takes a whole day of flying to get to my home country (Philippines) and the 21st day falls on my birthday (January 12). I don't want to be flying on my 30th birthday. That's the first bday I will be celebrating with my friends and family and it's the 3-0. It's a big deal for me.

I just want to spend Christmas and New Year's with my family and also my 30th. I've been celebrating it by myself for 9 years. For once I want to be surrounded by loved ones. I haven't been celebrating the holidays with them since I moved to the US which is 9 years. Part of my sadness too is I'm just so tired of being a good employee to her but she can't give me this. I have covered for my coworkers when they are away for vacation almost every other month. I only asked for a month so I can spend time with my mom who's getting older and older everyday. She requested me to come home on Christmas this year but I can't come unfortunately. She's 67 this year and has been complaining about her health problems. I don't want to be that daughter who will just come back to her country when someone is already dying or dead. knock on wood I asked for Sabbatical leave and she denied it, too.

I'm taking a month because it's hella far. It's not like another state, it's on the other side of the world.

My colleagues have expressed they are willing to sign a petition for approval since my boss' reason is “it would unfair for others” if she approved it.

I just want to cry. I'm so tired. I'm not in a good mental place lately and the time I want to spend with my family is something I have been looking forward to. It's not even this year, it's next year. I can't believe this. It gave me a mental breakdown, a panic attack, and now I'm just angry I'm crying. (Yes, I'm that type of person).

What should I do? I already reached out to HR about Sabbatical Leave. I might reach out to my therapist as well because this is too upsetting for me, all my emotions are in a roller coaster mode.

Sorry, if this is all over. I'm beyond disappointed about my boss' decision and how she shows no compassion to my needs to be with my family.

I don't know a single place with myself or anyone I know who just lets you take a month off.

I had to reread her post - basically, she wanted 4 weeks but the company policy is for 3 weeks, and she thinks it is unfair that her request was denied. I think that's it, and I'm baffled at why she's upset. Seems pretty cut and dry.

OP: I originally asked for a month, then I asked for three weeks and the remaining days will be unpaid time off. Also, under leave of absence.

What is your leave of absence reason? Unless it's medical that can also be denied.

OP: I would look after my mom who's complaining about her health. She's mentioned it a lot lately. And the second one is for my mental health. I have anxiety and maybe depression now because of these fricking comments.
My anxiety is diagnosed, btw. I haven't tested for depression yet but lately I've been feeling it. Hence, the need to be with my family is very important for me.

Just to clarify, you're asking for time off NEXT Christmas, 12/25/2024, not this Christmas 12/25/2023?

OP: Yes. Christmas 2024 to NY 2025. She's already asking for Prime Time requests off for next year.

your manager is seriously unreasonable.
this is plenty of time to plan around this.

She's not unreasonable if the company policy is 3 weeks. It's unreasonable to expect them to re write the policy for her. If she doesn't like the policy of her work place, she has a year to find a new employer.

This pissed off a bunch of r-slurred children.

A month off in the US is out of the norm. Your boss sounds generous giving you 3 weeks off. Can you work remotely from the Philippines for a couple of weeks or something?

OP: No, unfortunately not.
My bro took three months off for his wedding. He got approved without hesitation. He also works in the US. Came back without any problems.
My previous boss/employer approved me for a month off without any questions too. This was back in 2019. It's LOA. Came back happier and more in touch with reality.
I was asking for FMLA, she said it have to be a medical leave. Goodness gracious. I told her I'll do Sabbatical, she said no as well.
Gaddddh I wish I was rich

That is not what FMLA is for lmao. You cant just use it to take a long vacation and go visit family. Honestly, 3 weeks will be fine. You're likely just depressed, overworked, and homesick.

Very stable and sane. These are the kind of foids I want working in healthcare

She's not the one who moved all the way around the globe away from their family they say they NEED to be with. Sorry but that's just how it is.

OP: It wasn't my choice to moved here. Don't even start me with that.
The fuq is wrong with you people??? Corporate America has taken y'all. It's so sad. Also, family sounds like not much a matter to you?? I hope one day, they won't NEED you at all.

There's 1000+ comments of this shitshow somehow https://old.reddit.com/r/work/comments/16gccey/im_so_done_i_asked_my_boss_for_a_month_time_off/?sort=controversial&context=8