I was happily running up and down the beautiful suburbia hills in my neighborhood enjoying the runners high and the burned calories when I got a call from the salon that their power is out and I can't get my hair done today. I get my hair done in the city because nobody in this slack-jawed yokel town knows how to do hair, so I had to seek out a gay man. Only gay men know how to do hair. But today, I was told that they have no power and a bullet was lodged in their computer so they can't even schedule a new appointment.
My whole day is ruined. Just ruined.
I've come here for comfort and advice. Sometimes, my white privilege can't help me and I'm kinda bummed I can't use it today.
Krayon sexually assaulted his sister. 
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Running for no reason at all. Men fought and died in countless wars they sacrificed their lives to create the modern world to invent the power of the known universe in your hand all so we could have these musings bestowed upon us by a pampered class of listless oatmeal pussied sluts.
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I run and I eat cold oatmeal every day. But youโre welcome to stuff your colon full of fast food pork and and jiggle aggressively at your betters.
Youโre slow, fat, and weak. You disgust me. Your time will come.
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This sounds like the second coming of Jon of Ark this is the matriarchy I wanna subscribe too. Can you scold your pool boy for his less than tight abs? Oh god Iโm so horny right now
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As if I would ever fricking hire a pool boy whose abs werenโt absolutely shredded.
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The only mistake in this post is that I prefer scrambled eggs for the protein, not oatmeal, like a good privileged white woman.
Krayon sexually assaulted his sister.
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Eggs are way better
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