Meet your Egg Decorating Overlord [Easter Egg Contest Winner Thread]

Excuse the alt but some butthole banned me EVEN THO I have the most important job in the entire world to do today: Announcing the Egg contest winner.

I know for a fact that all of you have been literally dying over the results of the Easter Egg Contest. The race was tight and none of us could possibly have foreseen the results BUT worry no longer as I have the results and I am happy to introduce you to your Egg Decorating Overlord.

The Prize:

First Prize: 5k MB

Second Prize: 2.5K MB

Third Prize: 1k MB

YOU ALSO GET A FRICKING BADGE OMG

The Winner is OBVIOUSLY THIS ONE

This is the most beautiful fricking egg I have ever seen in my entire life. The artistry required to create this Egg is astounding and Thomas Kincaid himself is surely looking up from Heck in anguish knowing that he could NEVER create an egg this beautiful. This is the most deserved winner of any contest ever in the history of all contests. Bravo to you and thank you for sharing your art with us.

Second Prize:

You're a lazy b-word. This is just literally marker on an egg. I give you props because that egg is obviously from a bougie cage-free hipster farm and possibly locally sourced but otherwise you are what is wrong with Egg-related art contests. BE BETTER.

Third Prize:

Idk why you got third since you put more effort into your Egg art than the second prize winner did but maybe it's because the eggs are blue? Did you dye the eggs or do you just have weird mentally unstable chickens laying blue eggs? IDK but I am giving you the same amount of MB as the second prize winner because you obviously put effort into this and I appreciate that.

Dishonorable Mention

Sir what the frick is this? The lighting and wood grain tells me that this is at a bar. If this is your home then please make your home not look like a bar. Fricking alcoholic mess. The orange thing is cute tho so props for that. You get a badge.

Other Mentionables

This is sublime. I know you missed the voting thread but I know for a FACT that this would have been a strong contender for first place. Your effort is not ignored or forgotten and due to the amazing job you have done with your eggs I am giving you the second place prize amount of MB as well as the badge. Also you get brownie points for using a turkey egg because I honestly never really considered that turkeys lay eggs? Do turkeys lay eggs? I know way less about turkeys than I thought I did.

This egg is not rDrama related and is probably just some random Easter egg you saw at your mom's house BUT LOOK AT THAT EGG HOLDER. As an elderly woman on-the-inside I loooooove frivolous tchotchkes and this is a fine specimen. Old women would club each other to death to buy this at the Goodwill. For being related to someone that owns this adorable frivolous piece of trash you get the badge!

There's something very unsettling about this submission. Something sinister is happening with this egg. It evokes a visceral negative emotion that I can't quite put my finger on. It reminds me of that photo of the girl that was taken by her murderer shortly before he killed her.

This has very similar vibes to that. I have never experienced a photo of an egg that has major serial killer vibes but this manages to do that. Bravo for making an egg look dangerous. You get bonus points for promoting the mayocide but I think you may also need serious therapy. Good job!

Prizes will be doled out tomorrow when usernames are back to normal!