the right cant meme

The Christian Broadcasting Network is Pat Robertson's old company. They've been around since the 1960s, producing The 700 Club and... I'm honestly not sure what else.

In any case, here's the article in question.

Witches are targeting Trump again. In the photo on the right, Trump speaks at a campaign rally at Madison Square Garden, Oct. 27, 2024, in NYC. (AP Photo/Evan Vucci)

Witches Report Their Spells Against Trump Aren't Working: 'He Has a Shield'

BENJAMIN GILL

10-28-2024

From dabblers to hard-core practitioners, witchcraft has been on the rise in the U.S. in recent years. It has become so trendy that there's an entire TikTok hashtag dedicated to WitchTok, and it's got billions of views. The occult has gained popularity in the political realm as well, once again on display during this election season.

With the presidential election right around the corner, witches are trying to cast spells against Donald Trump, but this time around they're reportedly frustrated that their spells aren't working.

The Toronto Star reports on one example in which a group of roughly 100 witches has been gathering by Zoom to attack Trump in the spirit realm. "Armed with orange candles, tarot cards, and a not-so-flattering photo of the former president, they cast a spell to block his return to the White House. The final words of their synchronized ritual — 'You're fired!' — echo as Trump's image burns to the ground," the Star reports.

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The group is led by a woman with 25,000 subscribers on her mailing list, and she has invited all of them to join her in hexing Trump before the election.

But other news outlets are reporting that some witches are publicly bemoaning the failures of their spells against Trump.

An ABC News outlet in Alabama reports one witch wrote on the Reddit forum that her spells won't work like before, saying she believes it's because many people are praying. "Therefore he has a shield, a flimsy one of course, but a shield nonetheless (I am trying to figure out a way to create spells that can bypass that, but it's difficult)," the witch reportedly wrote.

Another posted, "I hate to say this, but don't do magic against him. He has a form of protection surrounding him that feeds off of magic done against him. You will have better results if you focus your magic on helping his opponent or protecting yourself and others."

Also writing on the WitchesVsPatriarchy thread on Reddit, another witch agreed that something appears to be protecting Trump from their spells.

"Some other witches have mentioned that doing spells directly against Trump are not as effective as we might hope as he seems to have some kind of protection around him," she complains.

Trump has publicly acknowledged God's protection of his life on multiple occasions since he was nearly assassinated at a rally in Butler, Pennsylvania in July.

Witches seem to be obsessed with trying to hex Trump since he entered politics. As CBN News reported throughout Trump's presidency, witches were publicly trying to bind him and even his Supreme Court picks, casting spells against them, especially in the lead-up to the 2020 election.

The trendiness of witchcraft on social media makes some young people believe it's just a harmless hobby. But people who used to be practitioners of witchcraft warn it is real, and it eventually destroys the person practicing it.

CBN News has spoken with an ex-witch named Jenny Weaver many times in recent years. She's now a Christian minister, but she reports her teenage dabbling led to darkness and terror.

"I had such a fear that gripped my life. It crippled me. The next thing that I knew, I was seeing things, hearing things, and I was being tortured by demonic spirits that had come in through the use of witchcraft. It was a very scary time. I didn't even want to close my eyes to wash my face. I was that terrified. If you think that it is innocent I am telling you it will take you down a road you do not want to go down. And I had to ask the Lord Jesus Christ to forgive me."

Weaver encourages others, "If you are practicing witchcraft, I am asking you today to give your heart to Jesus."

!dramatards, !effortposters, as you can see, it's similar to the posts about WitchTok and /r/WitchesVsPatriarchy we make right here on rDrama. The only real difference is that CBN are such enormous Christcucks, they, much like the witches they're mocking, think witchcraft actually exists.