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:boomerportrait: Wow, you're "politically active"? You must really care about your community :marseysmug:

:boomerportrait: I mean you must be one of those people that donates to local charities, right? I bet you donate a significant amount of your paycheck.

:boomerportrait: Oh, you don't? Understandable, you do work at McDonald's, after all. Well, I bet that you spend a lot of time volunteering though. Like serving homeless people at a soup kitchen or cleaning up litter.

:boomerportrait: Wait, seriously? You don't do that either? I just thought with all your free time you would. I would, you know, but I have a wife and kids haha. Well, at least you are a generally likable person, and try to get along with other people, right? Like you are probably the kind of person to help your friends out in a time of need, or bake cookies and give them to your neighbor.

:boomerportrait: You don't do that either? You are, in fact, a bitter, antisocial incel? Wow, could've fooled me. But, I bet that because you are "politically active" you spend a lot of time doing research and growing your understanding of political issues, so you have a better grasp of what's going on, right?

:boomerportrait: Okay, now you're yanking my chain! You're telling me that you only read books and blogposts from your own side of the political spectrum? You don't try to deepen your understanding of any of the issues you are advocating for outside of surface-level rhetoric. You were always such a gifted kid, I expected better... at least you engage in meaningful political activism.

:boomerportrait: You just sit on your computer and spout slogans all over the internet? Seriously? That's kind of path - I mean, probably advancing some needle somewhere, I guess. Well, I mean I at least you have other hobbies.

:boomerportrait: That's the only thing you do in your freetime?? This has been a beautiful week and you spent it inside? Don't you get bored or depressed?

:boomerportrait: Okay, well at least I got one thing right. Hey buddy, just remember that your mother and I love you very much, and that you are such a sweet and special young man. I just wish you would get out more. Enjoy life, you know? You don't look that bad, you could probably catch a girlfriend if you took a little better care of yourself. Let me tell you, having you was the biggest blessing in my life, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I just wish - ah forget it, your old man is getting soft

:boomerportrait: *closes door*

*shitposting resumes*

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