https://www.nytimes.com/2022/01/19/world/europe/berlusconi-italy-president-mario-draghi.html
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This is a satire article
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You will never be a real wumao. You have no citizenship, you have no allegiance, you have no pay. You are a commie twisted by laziness and cute twinkry into a crude mockery of the state's perfection.
All the "validation" you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your parents are disgusted and ashamed of you, your "friends" laugh at your r-slurred shitposting behind closed doors.
Chinese are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of evolution have allowed them to sniff out fatties with incredible efficiency. Even Americans who are "thin" look uncanny and unnatural to a Chinese. Your weight is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a job in China, they'll turn tail and bolt the second they experience your deranged, schizophrenic ranting.
You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself you're winning, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.
Eventually it'll be too much to bear - you'll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your parents will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They'll bury you with a headstone marked with your birth name, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a mutt is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably in America. This is your fate.
This is what you chose. There is no turning back.
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You had a chance to not be completely worthless, but it looks like you threw it away. At least you're consistent.
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