Ladies, this is how you do it

queen shit :marseynails:

94
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how do i make this work as a man :#pepemath:

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Pretend to be a single cardiosurgeon

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they wouldnt believe :marseyparappa: me :marseyst#inky:

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I think Maxim magazine used to have articles on how to fake a profession. Check around 1998 Yasmin Bleeth episode.

!coomers !oldstrags !genx

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>tfw visibly white trash

:marseyknowthatfeelbro:

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Peak rancher :marseycertifiedangus: physique tbh

Remember she ain't a lady if she ain't 280

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I can get skinny chicks, I just cant fake having a modicum of class :marseyindignant:

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Buy a stethoscope :marseydoctor: and a white :marseyokaymilk: coat like Malachi Love-Robinson

Any !dramatards or !oldstrags remember this king?

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/doctor-deception-how-florida-teen-allegedly-faked-being-m-d-n531726

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Poor kid was just trying to be Doogie Houser and they have to shut him down. :marseysad:

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https://media.tenor.com/UlWgg8a56EMAAAAx/mr-bean-mr-bean-ok.webp

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I am a marine biologist

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https://i.rdrama.net/images/17298159879872737.webp


https://i.rdrama.net/images/1728611539221579.webp

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fake a sexual emergency and :rape: someone

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shit your pants and ask if anyone on the plane does laundry

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>Attention everyone!

>is there a viet, a KO rean, or possibly a hassidic jew on board?

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At least ping PantsPoopers

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If it were that easy, why haven't you done it? !slots100

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Practice fainting so you can attract a young stud to give you mouth to mouth.

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Women can be doctors too chud

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The majority of medical students now are women. Some of them have never even had a peepee.

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which is a disaster because the AMA limits the number of new doctors and women retire earlier :marseynoooticer:

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Be a doctor dumbass

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Pretend you are drowning and make the hot lifeguard give you mouth to mouth


:chad!black2: :marseybear::marseyrefrigerator:

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By pretending to drown at a public pool

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Lifeguards are mostly scrotes in my experience.

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The only foid lifeguards I've ever known were highschoolers, too

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:marseywoodchipper2:

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I mean that as a point against pulling a sandlot, r-slur

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:surejan:

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!JANNIES HE'S BREAKING THE RULES

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Ok I banned him

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In what way? Long live the CCP

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Me? I'm not the one trying to give tips about how to get pubescent lifeguard foids to "give you mouth to mouth" here.

:marseywrongthonk:

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Perhaps go a few times to see when they have a female lifeguard on shift

This is the only way to ascend

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they use anti hepatitis or whatever masks when they give you CPR

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Santa isn't real I can't believe this. Has it been this way for a while?

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yeah since like the 90s

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You say it like it's a bad thing :marseyconfused2:

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Pretend to be Gary Chess

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A lot of doctors are gay.

So you still got a good chance.

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A Taiwanese Twink I know pretends to be Korean to lure SEAsians to him. Maybe that can work for you? :marseyshrug:

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