Two weeks ago my mom called and I told her about my worsening suicidal ideation. She said I'd get 1500GBP if I did my chores, went for a walk once a day and didn't attempt to commit for 2 weeks.
It's been two weeks and mom took me to Costco today to cash in my gets.
IT'S SO FRICKIN GOOD 
Gonna spend the rest of the night drinking malibu and playing Undertale 
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I used banana split, only tasted that until the second spoon, then the poop hit me.
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