@Gruestletoe's comment on 'A redditor feels guilty after encountering the world's most masculine pooner'

https://old.reddit.com/r/lgbt/comments/174vep5/am_i_transphobic

The other day at work, I was helping this young transgender man customer and I didn't know he was transgender until he corrected me very rudely after I said “It would be in the next aisle Miss” saying “ugh why does everyone misgender me? My pronouns are he/him, can't you tell?” And whispered to his friend “cis people annoy me” and I'm not even cis? (I'm a demigirl)

TLDR: A transgender man got upset I assumed he was a woman and I accidentally used the wrong pronouns but I apologized and afterwards addressed him with the proper pronouns . Am I transphobic?

Some choice replies:

Sounds to me like he was worn out with multiple incidental misgenderings and lashed out, doesn't make you transphobic for making a mistake as long as you correct yourself once you know better.

We're won't punish you, as long as you educate yourself, sweaty.

Your not transphobic, but I'm going to go against the hugboxing and say, gendered language is pretty dumb, and easy to avoid. What's wrong with "it's in the next isle" ? Unless you are talking to an old AF person who will get mad if you don't bow and kiss their feet, you will never get in trouble using gender neutral language.

Mhm! I am trans, and would rather someone not call me sir/ma'am, and just say, "It's in the next isle."

You should be rude to people and avoid polite titles because you might offend the permanently offended.

you're not transphobic. maybe stop using the gendered terms though so it doesn't happen again

:marseyeyeroll:

No but he's allowed to be upset about being misgendered and vent to his friend. We non-passing people are allowed to vent and correct people on misgendering us. Passing shouldn't be a prerequisite for not being misgendered. Next time, use less gendered langauge and don't eavesdrop on private convos

While you may not be transphobic, you're a horrible rude prick anyway!

:!marseysoyjaktalking:

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egg_nogger they/them 1yr ago #5151453

Of all the inexplicable, self hating tendencies these NPC have, this kind of self flagellation is both the most confusing and pathetic of them. I can't even understand it. I could count on one hand the number of times I've apologized at work in the last ten years, working management the entire time. “Sorry” isn't even in my lexicon. This is part of being an adult, unironically.

I can't even fathom going through life being constantly sorry for committing the original sins of being White (normal), not :marseytrain: (normal), straight (normal) and male (we are actually a minority)