What's an average day in your life like (as a registered s*x offender)?

Hi, everyone. I was just thinking about how much a conviction initially shakes up a person's life, but how many people here have had success rebuilding relationships and careers while dealing with restrictions.

Regardless of where you're at in life, what's an average day look like for you? How does your conviction (or your partner's conviction) affect you on a daily basis?

I know that for my partner and I, life is pretty normal and on an average day we aren't directly affected by restrictions. Usually we have coffee together before work and spend the evenings hanging out watching shows or playing video games. Sometimes we're busier and have friends come over, work on projects, or get errands and chores out of the way. It's mundane in the best way possible.

This wasn't always the case for either of us, so I'm curious to hear where others are at in life.

Some of the comments:

Every single day is affected.

He can't come to my house, I have to go there. It's an hour each way.

He can't move closer because finding something to rent is virtually impossible. He's put in many applications and never hears anything back.

He has a 6pm-6am curfew on weekdays. If anything needs to happen after 6pm, that's on me. When I had a flat tire two miles away he couldn't come help. When I was rushed to the ER he couldn't come there. When I was incredibly sick he couldn't come stay with me. When a close family member died he couldn't attend the funeral. He can never go to anything like my friends birthday parties, weddings, Friendsgiving. He can't spend holidays with us, he spends them alone and I get there as soon as I can.

Trying to buy a house is maddening. When we find one we like we immediately call to get the address okayed. That takes days, at which point the house is usually under contract by the time we get an answer.

Going out to dinner is a rarity and he has to get permission so it's generally not even worth it.

Pretty much all outdoor activities are off the table due to restrictions.

Basically he goes to work and goes home. He drives almost an hour each way because finding a job where he lives was impossible and finding a place to live close to where he works was equally impossible.

Thankfully his PO will let him be late sometimes so he can do the basic things humans need to do (like get groceries, pay bills, etc…). Otherwise, he's mostly relegated to the shithole he has to live in because finding something else is impossible.

So, typical day for him is:

Get up Go to work Work Go home Shower PO might come by Go to bed

I don't have a typical day anymore. It's madness, chaos, always behind on something, way too much driving, calling his PO to get permission to do something, looking at houses, working till 2am, researching the heck out of everything, reading case files, talking to attorneys, sheriffs, state police, DA's, etc… to try to put an end to this. He can't do those things himself due to his work schedule. Taking care of pets, medical appointments, managing my employees, attempting to finish getting my house ready to sell (with no help).

It's a lot. There's not much of anything that isn't affected.

Whenever we've spoken about this it's absolutely broken my heart. If you need anything, I'm just a call away ♡

Thank you 🥰 I appreciate you more than you can imagine.

I think you have told me but I forgot, is he still on probation/parole? How long has he been on/how long does he have?

Just 9.5 more years. 😩 they give insanely long probation times here.

That's so crazy. A couple years or 5 years is hard enough. 10 on top of prison is just crazy. Do you think as he gets further into probation that his restrictions could get lifted?

Nothing is automatically lifted, you have to take it to court. That's why I spent so much time pulling and reading cases - finding ones like his where they were given much shorter sentences, where they've been allowed to go to unsupervised probation, where they've had pro thin terminated early, etc… I've found people long done and removed from the registry already who were sentenced the same week because their sentences were so much lighter/shorter. So, we'll see.

I hope all your hard work pays off at least in one way or another! Don't stop fighting!

Thank you! I won't stop. It's just… a lot.

I am in tears after reading what your average day is like, it's insane they still punish people for so many years after prison. I have a family member who is in prison now, he will face the similar situation after the prison. I admire your sacrifice for your loved one, it's very inspiring, also thank you so much for your advice and shared info in this sub, your hard work on research has been helping me a lot, I am sure it helps other people too, greatly appreciate it. Take care, hope the situation of you two gets to improve in the near future.

What a struggle this libertarian has to go through

Mine is fairly boring. I wake up, have breakfast, a few shots of espresso, pack gym clothes and go to work for 7:30/8am. I usually take lunch around 1 or 2 and go to the gym. Then back to work until around 8 or 9pm. Then when I get home do some meal prep, laundry, etc. Repeat this.

Weekends sometimes I work. I have my son every other weekend. Then after work on weekends sometimes I'll go out with a lady friend. I also take care of most of my cooking, and household stuff on weekends. Have a cigar and a drink here and there.

Fairly boring.

That sounds cozy. Boring is good, IMO.

Not for my personality type.

Aw man. I hope you find some adventure and stimulation, then!

I think adventure and stimulation may be where a lot of his problems stem from...

Normal. I'm up for work , kid at camp , daughter in day care, coke home , cook, clean , bed time. Rinse and repeat. Sprinkled in are fun time, movies , parks, day trips , farms to pick fruit, etc.

Beach vacation 1 week are year , typically a beach in SC.

Only shitty part us school events and registering every 6 months. In MD by the way.

I watch my kids all day during the day. When my wife gets off work I go to the gym. Then I play video games for a few hours and then I lay in bed and watch streamers on twitch til I'm ready to go to sleep. On my wife's day off we usually go do things. Recently we went on a boat ride through a cave. That was pretty cool. It'll get difficult when my 5 year old goes to school in August. At that point I'll have to go back to work. Been a stay at home dad for the last 5 years. I have no idea who will hire me. The registry rarely comes up in my house anymore. I have arrangements with my kids schools so I can go to school functions. Life Is pretty normal. Sometimws I almost forget that I'm on the list. I hope everyone who reads this has a good life or a life that gets better. Take care yall.

Been off probation since 2018. That's when life got mostly back to normal. I'm lifetime registrant.

It made me really happy to read your comment. You're giving others so much hope; I'm proud of you for getting through your probation!

Thank you. There was a time when life was heck. And my wife told me she would never have a kids with me. I thought about divorcing her so she could find someone else and have a kid later. Having the guilt of robbing my wife of motherhood was worse than any of the registry restrictions. But if I divorce her when she said she wanted to stay with me is just tak8ng one more choice away from her. So I stayed. And things got better and we decided we could have a kid after all. And he is a treasure. He is starting kindergarten in August and he is so excited.

Wtf is with this wife who said she wasn't going to have kids with this registered s*x offender and then immediately changed her mind

My life sucks

I contemplate suicide everyday. I mostly sleep as much as possible and even when I wake up I just lay there with my eyes closed trying to go back to sleep. The restrictions are insane and make improving my life or succeeding virtually impossible. I just sleep, work, and pray to god that I won't wake up again. No friends and too poor to afford anything.

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