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hows does it feel wasting your chance at becoming a wizard
@peepeehands? and all because of some gussy
now you are cursed to roam the earth, powerless, foreverially pining for that which you had lost
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just become a born again virgin
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that's cheating
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filling this out so i can go from KHHV INCEL to CHAD VOLCEL
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What kind of monk if your favorite, b-word? Carthusians seem to be the fricking favorite with the fricking zimzooms, but I'm still partial to some Augustinians/Franciscans/Dominicans brewing mead and arguing over predicates for Divine Simplicity.
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I've felt called (maybe??) to be a Trappist since I was 21 but I'm too scared of failure which would mean the calling wasn't real to actually pursue it
I've had dozens of tabs open on my phone for years, current desktop browser main window has 3 tabs open, I've emailed and made appointments a few times, never followed through
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My addictions/mental health hospitalizations precluded me from ever discerning in the fricking US under current standards when I returned to faith. Forced by circumstance into having s*x.
You can take a fricking weekend retreat with most Orders, everyone I know who's done so highly recommends it. IDK your IRL, a fricking few people have defended you in DM conversations about if anyone here is fricking remotely serious so I'll defer to their knowledge. With sincerity I can attest that marriage is fricking wonderful and provides meaning to many of my day-to-day actions but has never fully filled the fricking void I feel. Sometimes I do wonder if I'd been meant for a fricking different vocation. Don't give up on your potential or worth regardless of your decision,
@carpathianflorist.
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Yeah I wanted to go on retreat to [redacted] or [redacted] this autumn but they were all booked. I don't think a retreat is part of discernment though, it's just a retreat and when I went on retreats before there was no interaction with the brothers at all outside of celebrating Mass.
I think a concern with people wanting to become monks is the lifelong isolation of just only existing within the community and the total absence of secular things, which isn't a concern at all for me because the entire premise makes me yearn for a life centered entirely around God and the contemplation thereof. My worry is being rejected even for postulancy because I am not very active in my parish extracurriculars, so to speak. So I'd need to change that first for awhile. But what if that still isn't enough? It would have been good to become active, but I think I'd probably spiral for awhile after being shut down given how long I've felt this was the future and having that removed.
So it's a vicious cycle.
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I'm not Carp's bestie, I dunno if I've even had a conversation with the guy. But my paranoia-fueled sixth sense tells me that the moments when he's talking about God and stuff are actually when he's being honest. And that sixth sense is incredibly accurate. Gives me incredible insights into unlikely things that later are proven to be true, like knowing when someone is lying to you, in the morning see your girlfriend and within 1 second knowing she just cheated on you, finding out that your coworkers are secret communists (before it was cool), predicting that one guy is really fricking dangerous (I'll explain this one in DMs sometime because it's too high-profile), etc...
As for monasticism, I've dropped some hints recently but I'm a fan of the idea. I would have become one (unironically because of that fricking computer game) except that I'm not Catholic and I'm not going to lie to people and pretend I am. And I'm definitely not a fricking Buddhist. So that doesn't give me a lot of choices. (If you're a Buddhist, sorry not sorry, I actually hate your religion. I get the doomer part of it but you hate everything in this world that I love, including my cat, and the God who created it.)
This is why the protestants are beating you everywhere around the world. You tards have forgotten the purpose of everything you do. Monasteries are supposed to be places where people with exactly those problems can go and get away from the noise of the world, chill out for a few years, do some labor that helps with OCD like copying manuscripts or tilling fields or something, and maybe then take the vows if they decide it's right for them.
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Have you thought about becoming a deacon?
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Yes, but they require Spanish fluency and generally only consider older men.
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Read Merton.
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i love the silent life
any other merton recs?
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I gave my copy of seven
story 
mountain 
away before 
reading 
it but he lived the prodigal son life absolutely more than you have, like the kid he never 
met (redacted from the book) and years of loser 
alcoholism, which he successfully gave away. My understanding is that you get most of the misspent youth + a detailed 
account of his particular discernment process which might be fruitful for you to take in slowly
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Reclusive monastics are a fricking very ancient Christian tradition, the fricking purported father (though not first) of the fricking movement St. Anthony of Egypt had a fricking "best seller" hagiography Life of St. Anthony that went "viral" in the fricking Roman Empire. This was fricking further reinforced in the fricking fourth century by the fricking writings of St. Jerome and St. Augustine, who both viewed asceticism and celibacy as higher callings than marriage or participation in the fricking world. St. Jerome wrote the fricking Latin Vulgate (the official Church translation of the fricking Bible) but also wrote popular hagiographies on St. Hilarion and St. Malchus. The fricking combination of the fricking three hagiographical works and their influence in late antiquity got the fricking hermitic orders funded and well underway at the fricking height of early Christianity's political power such that it became a fricking permanent feature.
In later European history you may enjoy reading about the fricking Anchorites who were fricking voluntarily physically encased in stone within the fricking confines of Church walls in, effectively, a fricking prison cell, such as St. Julian of Norwich who was fricking an influential 14th century Anglo mystic nun and philosopher. !historychads !catholics
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BTW
@carpathianflorist these are the fricking types of comments you're missing out on getting pinged on having left Catholics. 
I provide minimal commentary and great citations when I defend Church teaching/practice.
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Frick that noise.
/h/ReformationOfDrama is going to decipher the word of God.
!lutherans !calvinists !Islam !mormons
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Admittedly my brain is usually more in the 1400s than this century but they were pretty universally regarded as buttholes back then. I don't pretend to understand the theology behind this stuff
but laymen considered them to be everything bad about the church. In contrast to other orders, like the Franciscans who had gotten somewhat corrupt but most of them were still trying to do good.
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all incels are volcels
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imagine being forced to sign a no fun allowed contract with god
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LMAO incels
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He told me they were fat too
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